Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 632. page

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I've been dating a coworker for a few months and at first it was all new and fresh. Now I'm starting to think the only link between us is work and that he lets me drive his car. He's a normie but he seems to secretly like the thrills whenever I speed away like a nutjob.

In any case, I've asked him what he likes to do in his freetime. He doesn't like videogames, isn't into music, reading books, sports, movies etc. although he's always 'on the move', needs to do something. So instead, he cleans, irons clothes, cooks, watchs tv to fall asleep, cleans again, maybe travels but mostly by car. He is passionate about his work though, can talk hours about it.

I'm only slightly flattered whenever he acts interested into buying a book or going to a concert with me eventhough it's out of his world and clearly would be doing something else. Most certainly wouldn't enjoy it either.

I don't know why he does this? He says he's adaptable? Am I in the wrong to feel irritated and prefer he liked the things I did and not 'like' or show interest in them for my sake? Is he empty? How should I approach this without insulting him?
Does this have a chance of survival? Should I 'open his world' or keep him out of my business?


tl;dr
>dating coworker
>his life revolves around work, no other hobbies
>good husband(waifu?) material
>intrudes on my life, interests and hobbies just for my sake
>doesn't particularly enjoy them, at best acts interested
>has no part in my world, he's like an impostor
>claims to be highly adaptable, does whatever the crowd he's in does
>reads to me as having no personality (i too am adaptable if it's to my interest but i have a core that doesnt change)

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How do you flirt/attract a woman cca the age of 50?

There's one I have been crushing on and I just don't know how to approach this.

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I've been on medication for about a year now and although it helped tremendously with my intrusive thoughts, I still feel apathetic and "supressed".
As if as soon as I stop taking it everything will come rushing back or I'll fall into depression again. The reason I think this is because despite the therapy I've been through with my psychologist, I'm not getting any closer to accepting myself and being able to trust other people.
I constantly worry that I'm not good enough for any situation or that anything positive that happens in my life isn't deserved. I also believe that there are things I'm simply not destined for because of how horrendously bad I am at them or how alien them seem to me. Intimacy or basic relationships seem like an insurmountable task due to how reliant they are on things like blind trust or sacrificing aspects of yourself to be with someone else and being successful at any job or task that requires responsibility seems impossible. Even something basic like working at McDonald's is daunting to me due to the million ways I could fuck it up.
Anyways I feel like despite somewhat understanding these issues and where they stem from, I can't overcome them and be happy or accept myself. What do I do?

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>constant dreams about my ex who I haven't seen in about four months lately

What did my subconscious mean by this?

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Step one is admitting you need to improve. What is it you want to improve on?

Personally I want be more punctual and more productive. I feel like I'm always late and I don't get enough done in a day. What's your crutch?

I apologize if there's already a thread for this. I'll delete if it's redundant.

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Hey /adv/, hope you can help me on this
I'm still in higshchool, but as you know, in september we go back to school to a new year.
In my country, public higshchools are really damn popular, everybody wants to get in every year, even if they already had a school to go to the last year. This ex of mine did her exams and she passed them, in theory, she should've been elegible to enter the school she wanted to, right?
We were this kind of couple that would be breaking up and getting back, and she was too jealous, it was not healthy. I decided that I would change school, but I would remain in a private school, because it is easier to get in and we can afford it. And out of nowhere, she texts me saying that she was going to the same school as I was. I wanted to start completely fresh, because the first year in my former school was terrible. And she picked the same study plan as I did. That school doesn't have too many students so we may even be in the same class. I don't want to talk to her, she hurt me too much. She told me she would talk to me because I'd be the only known person to her. I can't change school again. What do I do? Why do you think, out of all private schools there are, she had to choose the same as I did?

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Should I just move back in with my mom and give up on life?
I don't enjoy anything. People and social interaction gives me a headache.
I can't be out in public for too long or I get completely fatigued and feel really tired.
There's no way I could handle any sort of interpersonal relationship.
Obviously my rotten personality would deter any female from wanting a relationship with me anyway and my standards are laughably high considering what a loser i am.

Years ago I actually started a course but fucking hated it and dropped out almost instantly.
So I got a job and bought all the shit I wanted. It's been a couple years and I'm still working but wondering what the point is.
The money is just piling up now and there's nothing i care to spend it on. Already have all the shit for my cat and a $4000 gaming pc.
VR is still at least a decade away from being decent and even then i don't really care.

I feel like I'm still be waiting for my life to start. A cute anime girl will fall from the sky and change everything and I'll become a normal person capable of loving other people instead of a retarded degenerate misanthrope faggot.

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Is your wife also supposed to be your best friend?

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I've had so much anxiety this past week or two about potentially losing my job that I can barely function and barely have any appetite at all.

After being unemployed for so long this job was a God send. It finally let me feel like I could function properly in society, empathise with people who also worked full time jobs and just not feel like an outcast in general when with friends or family. If I lose it, I don't even know if I'd be this lucky again with work.

All I want to do is distract myself or sleep - I just don't want to be alone with my thoughts for long. I've never felt this awful in my life, it feels like I could just start crying or panic at any given moment. Obviously I'd settle right back down if I don't lose this job, but if I do I'm not sure what sort of reaction I'll have.

Anyone just had an overwhelming sense of dread like this before? How did you deal with it?

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During the last five years, maybe a little more. I've had really big problems with some of my friends, the situations vary from people to people but I think the most common theme among them is that I feel under appreciated by them.

Just this year I've cut ties or distanced myself form four people I used to talk to regularly and that I trusted the most. As I said it's an issue that comes years prior to this one, but I'm getting a feeling that it doesn't matter what I do or what I don't do I can never please anyone.

I don't consider myself to be a shitty friend, actually quite opposite. I'm the type of person that will hear you when you're down, or look up for you when you're going through stuff, I would buy stuff for you if I'm going to another country, among other things. Yeah, I have my flaws, but I don't feel they outweigh the good stuff.

Usually the people I cut ties with are inconsiderate to my time or feelings, selfish, are not willing to talk if something goes wrong, etc.

I just find myself in a position in which I can't trust other humans, they all turn to be the same. And I really try to be this caring person to other people, but I just don't feel it anymore, I don't feel like the positive emotions to actually care for someone else or do things for them. If they talk to me I really don't care, I don't worry for them.

I'm becoming lonelier each time and I think that I won't be able to find people to talk to anymore.

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Im not really sure what I'm hoping to get out of this thread, whether its just a vent thread or if someone can actually help, but here I go

>take class online for the summer
>notoriously bad at online classes
>I actually do very well with the quizzes and assignments
>I keep up with the subject matter for the most part
>start to get more slack on studying
>quiz grades still stay the same though
>take the final
>get 95%
>last thing to do in the class is write a final paper: 5 pages
>for the life of me, I can't think of a compelling subject matter to write about
>end up finishing the paper a couple days late
>its a bit short and bit rushed, but I turned it in before the cutoff time (I think)
>without the paper I still "pass" the class with a ~60%
>now I just wait for it to be graded
>and wait
>and wait some more
>the paper is still ungraded and my final grade in the class sits at a D
>in my student portal, the final grade in the class says D
>I just emailed the professor about it

Am I fucked?? Can I do something about my grade? Even with it late, and short, I should be able to at least get a B or at maybe a C+ at worst

What should I do?

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>3 people looking to rent, going through a letting agency
>we put an offer on a house on basis of "we are happy with the house as we saw it" - mainly relating to the pre-existing furniture
>agents say the landlord is happy to leave all the furniture, except for the obvious (TV, speaker systems)
>offer accepted by landlord (who currently lives there)
>take a week to pass all the referencing for the property, set to move in soon

I got a call today from the letting agents saying that the landlord now wants to take all the furniture out of the property.

To what level should I make a fuss over this? Ultimately letting agents / landlords hold all the power, so I don't want them to end up rejecting our offer (would they do this over the matter of furniture? seems like a lot of hassle for them).

But it feels incredibly fucking unfair that the offer we put forward was under the assumption "happy as seen", and now they're changing their minds? I want to dig my heels in but I do not want to lose the house.

Any advice?

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Four months ago I changed careers, will this impact the mortgage qualification process?

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Hello, /adv/

I've contemplated opening up a bouldering gym here in my town. I didn't know whether to ask her or /biz/. Really just looking for tips on starting up a business as I am still young and have never had experience with businesses. I currently work in the healthcare field as an EMT. Rock climbing/bouldering has been a passion for me. My current idea is to start small. Get a loan. Open a small bouldering gym. Build up a clientele then slowly expand. It's a somewhat college town I live in. Closest rock climbing gyms are two hours away so I feel like there's somewhat of a demand for it. Really just looking for tips/business suggestions. Any advice is good advice.

Thank you.

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Hi! I'm kind of stumped on what I want to do for a living.

I'm a very creative person. I enjoy the fine arts, I'm a dancer, actor, I play various instruments and part of an orchestra. I also like creating content, like graphic design or AV production.

The thing is, I don't know if any of those would be a good career choice, seeing as they are creative jobs. You know how it is, you get a degree in any of these and you'll end up without a job for a long time. Even if you do find a job, it won't be something stable probably.

So I want to know what would be a good career path to take? I suck at math, if it matters. I'm very social though!

My girlfriend and I are looking to move to a big city in the future, and she's gonna study to be a psychologist. I'm pretty sure that's also one of those jobs where you'll have a hard time finding something stable for a while.

At this point, I'll do any job that requires a degree to make good bank. Even jobs without a degree are cool. I just don't want to be under financial stress, basically.

What can I choose?? Thanks for the help!