Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6058. page

Visit all of your family for the whole week and eat at their place.

>>16862181

several options

>scrounge up lose change
>by a 5 pound bag of carrots for 2 bucks
>eat a pound of carrots a day

also alternate with ramen. not spuer healthy but you'll make it to friday with nothing but maybe a cold. ramen and carrots are the two cheapest things out there really.

>BUT NO CHANGE

seriously just go walk around and see what you find. even pennies. ramen is extremely cheap.

also
>ask for an advance

my boss fronted me 150 this week. maybe yours will be as kind. if not

>pay day loan

go to any pay day loan place locally. dont assume they dont exist, they do. google it in your area, you will find one. bring in some pay stubs and they will front you the money. will cost you more later.

>ask a friend or family member

simply be honest, say oyu get paid friday and can pay em back then. even if its just 10 dollars that will get you ramen and carrots, yeh?

>get a credit card

not gonna get approved in time now, but this is pretty much the only reason you should have a credit card or line of credit.

>go to parties

know where a lot of parties are? go there and gorge.

>are you a girl? go on a few dates

even if its take out or fast food, better than nothing

finally,
>sell something

if its at a pawn shop you might even get it back.

>>16862181

I'm in this exact situation and no clue. Mostly just bum off my friends. Payback in favors and money once I get it.

>>16862139
Get to know her a bit better irl, then ask her out

if this is serious you could just say if she does want to see a film

>>16862139

yo girl let's go see deadpool

So you don't have any friends, and interactions with family are awkward and fizzle out?

>>16862128
Correct. Am I just totally boring?

Life is pretty infinite, there's always current events, some stuff is good often, and there's memories too. You're always thinking about new stuff right? it's as easy as that. Besides it takes a year to go through all the sex positions.

Stop trying. The harder you try, the more desperate you come across. No girl likes desperate guys

>>16862120

I was a virgin for quite a long time. finally I got around to hanging out with a girl regularly, and all of a sudden I was in bed with another girl.

YMMV, but maybe you should look for a girl-friend before you try to get a girlfriend

>>16862120
>>16862122

>no girl likes desperate guys

to a large degree, this. buy why?

well think of it this way. there are lots of men asking most any worthwhile girl out. so they have options. but thats a double edged sword. they realize that they may be the 5th girl you asked out, or at least attempted to get close to this week.

the reality is that guys hit on just as many girls
as girls get hit on by guys.

so why would a girl think you ACTUALLY think she is special? why would she think you are anything authentic? by your own admission you just 'want a girlfriend'. and ur only requirement is the vague 'doesnt suck too much'.

what girl wants to think
'WOW I CANT BELIEVE I DONT SUCK JUST ENOUGH TO BE ANONS GIRLFRIEND!'

there is nothing special about that. there is nothing special about your relationship. there is nothing special about you.

if you can treat a girl like she is special, she might actually feel special. and she might reciprocate those feelings.

but if you treat every girl you think you have a shot iwth like you think you have a shot with them, then what you end up being is a 'nice guy' slut. you're nice to all the girls. so why would they think you only have eyes for them?

and isnt that what we all want?

the second issue here is an extension of the first one. but you essentially treat girls like an appliance
>i need to get a toaster
>as long as it makes toast, its okay!

thats pretty bad logic. humans want to have an actual connection when they connect with people. otherwise, whats the point?

you know who wants a boyfriend 'who doesnt suck too much if possible?'

14 year olds in chat rooms who cant get a date in real life, so they ask each and every random person in the chat room to be their long distance bf, and immediately tells them 'i love you' and will never actually meet but 'THANK GOD I GOT A GF or BF'

Just write your crap down, procrastinating can be helpful for some things (it lets you fine tune before you go for it) but now here. It will almost definitely suck at the beginning, you'll need to give it to the friendly writer community and get feedback. Some people are a bit defensive about their work and so never get told why their books are constantly rejected. I doubt someone will publish it in less than a year, unless you pay them to do so (which you shouldn't).

>>16862100

>I HAVE THIS REALLY BIG GOAL FOR SOMETHING IVE NEVER DONE BEFORE AND THAT MOST PEOPLE NEVER DO, THAT I LITERALLY HAVE NO CONTROL OVER
>WHY AM I SO SCARED TO TRY

you will not get published in 2017. your first book is not going to go very far. accept that and you will go ahead and write your story. write it for fun.

and you dont have to worry about if its bad, cuz it will be bad. thats what a first draft is. you go back, make a second draft, one chapter at a time, and that'll make you feel comfortable posting it online, one chapter at a time, getting feedback from a few loyal readers.

>>16862100

ask your highschool english teacher

>>16862074
GO outside! doesn't have to be a bar just go to a mall and browse or get some coffee. Being surrounded by people will make you feel better. sitting inside talking online will make you feel worst even though your instinct tells you you will feel better.

>>16862081
Go outside where ?? Its literally raining/snowraining all the fucking time where i live whilst being cold.

Any place that i could go to would be inside somewhere, and i dont know anybody anywhere - so why would i go anywhere?

I dont feel like going to a museum, nor to some other artsy thing. I refuse to get fucked up partying while working, as i am trying to leave an A+ impression during my internship at a big company for added safety after i get my masters in the form of a potential job offer...

Maybe i could go to some music bar to listen to people play? I dont really know at the moment..

Thanks for replying though.

>>16862074

first and foremost

>the bobcat teaches us to be alone without being lonely

its a native american spirit totem. reflect on that. though if i had to guess by your lack of whiny angsty bullshit, you kinda mastered that and legitimately need to make some friends. we all need some degree of interaction, even the lone bobcats.

so my advice
>you study languages
>presumably in some sort of class
>presumably at some sort of insitution
>quite possibly where you can make friends through class clubs, or other extra curricular possibilities

thats where you start. even if something seems only vaguely interesting, go there. any general geekdom will likely have geeks of other types that more closely match your geeky interests. or if you arent really a geek, seek out other clubs that might match what you want.

from there
>meetup.com

lots of meetups in lots of areas that go into many sub groups. again, if there isnt a group that meets your exact interest, go to the next best thing. at the very least you tried something new. at best, you made new friends

>craigslist

creepy, right? but go to the general discussion section and look at ALLLLL the various little things that people post about. choose anything remotely interesting. chat a bit, and see if any are posting meetups. and if not ask people specifically about any meets ups. and if not MAKE A MEET UP!

then transition people you meet here into your own rag tag gang of something or others who meet once a week to play board games or what have you.

You can either continue drawing as a hobby, which is perfectly fine, or sacrifice everything to go to school for illustration. If you really wanted to be an illustrator bad enough, you would have found some way to study it, maybe it's not for you? Either way, Your history thing seems to be going great so I think stick with that, your job doesn't have to be your greatest passion.

>>16862036
Art schools are a waste of money. ANYTHING they teach you is available online for free.

Finish your education first. Far too many people think Art and illustration is something they can live off of. And its not. Get a life together then pursue your true passions in life.

>>16862075
I've done Vilppu's videos, New masters academy, gnomon, cgma classes, and local classes at a shitty studio nearby. They have all (except the last one) helped enormously in introducing me to the method of illustration but I have never benefitted from one on one teaching that i assume is essential to actually improve and figure out what I am doing wrong. I have put a tremendous amount of effort into self teaching because I knew that when I started, it was too late for me to ask my parents to fund my education abroad.

Maybe it had worked for you, but not in my case.

I know I’m not a supermodel looking guy but I think I look fine. In fact I've been told much uglier guys than myself do well and even seen this be the case(although some people still insist it's how I look). But when I ask people for their opinions because I honestly don’t get other people and I know I can’t speak for others they all just tell me my problem is I’m not confident blah blah but I’ve had girls actually tell me I don’t come off as having low self-esteem or low confidence at all. Probably because those things don’t fucking apply to me and I have no idea why this “has” to be the reason. Plus I’d say the two guys I know who have been with the most women are also the straight up most insecure I know even by the admission of some girls they’ve fucked. So I see literally ZERO correlation there.

Started working and saying it was the only way women would notice me more. 2 and a half years later I look different. Women still ignore me and I’m still told I’m below average(in which case it’s like why did I waste all this time and money on fitness only to still be below average? I don’t really care about this that much. Maybe I would if it’d actually made a difference). I know people are just going to say I should be working out “for myself” but I don’t give a single shit about working. Most of the girls I get ignored by when I approach them probably don’t work out.. It doesn’t give me an “enhanced sense of well being” like it does for everyone else I know who does it. In fact lifting weights just makes me feel super stressed out.

I’ve literally only ever had women tell me I’m ugly. Even though both the people who said this have also said I’m cute and really good at holding a conversation so I should have no problem with women. But these are also girls I met via message boards so it’s not like I was going to meet or fuck or date them. They were just people I wanted to speak to because I don’t really have friends in real life and these people told me they felt like we got along or they had a “connection”(another concept I don’t really understand at all) with me and they seemed like neat people who were easy to speak to.

Speaking of which that’s another issue. People tell me I should just get with girls who “actually like me.” But the thing is those people don’t seem to exist since the only time I’ve ever had women speak to me willingly is online. I literally CANNOT get women I don’t already know via someone else to speak to me at all in real life. Much less give me their number(aside from the few instances of someone giving it to me without asking which usually turns into me texting them like twice and being asked who it is even if they already acknowledged me or just not responding at all). I find it very easy to talk to people IF I CAN GET THEM SPEAK TO ME AT ALL. But that latter part is less likely than time travel being discovered in my lifetime.

Some more successful guys tried to put me on okc and Tinder and insisted at first they could get me laid or a date at least. Then they try and build me a profile or wingman me or introduce me to girls they or their fuck buddies or gfs know and just in general nothing happens. Even when women try to help me out and insist they could do better because they are women. It honestly seems like nobody is able to help me. And when this becomes clear guys usually default to telling me it’s how I look and it’s like ok but I’m lifting weights already and there’s only so much I can change about my natural appearance. And women are usually less specific but tell me I should just do something else. It’s frustrating because most of the guys and girls saying this are people who go out of their way to get laid or date a lot and act like it’s weird I’m interested in it(and feel the need to tell me so but ignore it when I point out the hypocrisy)

I’m honestly not sure how interested I am in actually “dating” seriously. I’m 27 and only lost my viriginity less than half a year ago to a backpage escort because people kept telling me I should fuck a prostitute and then I’d see sex isn’t a big deal. it was never a big deal I just wanted to get laid lol. But the point is I’m not particularly interested in being the guy who gets stuck with the first or second person they ever fuck and everyone else I know even if they want a relationship still gets to date around to varying to degrees. But when I explain this even to some of these same people I get lectures about how girls aren’t just sex toys or whatever even when I go out of my way to explain that I am still interested in getting to know people to begin with so we can bypass that.

>>16862014
>i'm guessing there's a big percentage of people that are having sex with girls they don't actually have much in common with.
nope.

Most people have sex with people they know or are friends with.

If you just want to fuck . Get a hooker or ask a female friend.

Random fucking is not as prevalent as media would lead you to believe.

>>16862014

>how do i put up with the inane stuff people speak about.

theres your problem. anything you dont like is suddenly inane.

i dont like legos, but i met a guy who builds them for a living. fuck, i didnt even like legos when i was a kid. was never good with building them. always ended up with just a block. sometimes it had wings.

but he loved what he did and i just took the time to listen about it. he took the time to listen to me talk about my 'inane' shit to.

different doesn't have to be boring. on the contrary, other peoples interests can be even more 'interesting' to you if you never adequately explored them.

granted, this guy was exceptionally non-mainstream. he had serial killer tattoos and worked at lego land building those giant fucking lego models and all that.

but the point is that you can learn something new. you are not the center of the world. you are not patrician.

>i dont know if id be able to listen to some random girl speak about stupid shit for like 30 hours before she puts out

then dont. there is no shortcuts, no cheatcodes, or any of that bullshit. getting things you want takes sacrifice. so sorry the world doesn't drop pussy right on your dicks.

>>16862033
>Most people have sex with people they know or are friends with.
i kinda find hard to believe that most people that fuck are genuinely friends.. in the sense i'm friends with my best friend, with whom i've spoken for hundreds of hours and i'm still able to speak to him. i don't know if it's only my case, but i've met a lot of people and i've only managed to have a similar rapport with like 3 people..
>>16862037
>theres your problem. anything you dont like is suddenly inane.
i don't think that's my problem. i usually manage to enjoy myself while speaking to people by asking questions about what they do, or stuff that's happened to them (eg. i think law is boring but i was enjoying myself talking to a female lawyer on friday asking them about weird people they've had to deal with).. but i think most people are going to eventually run out of interesting stuff to say before they start speaking about mundane stuff. so unless they're intrinsically interesting (they're funny or thoughtful or something), i'm going to get bored. isn't it like that?

>>16861985
hazel

I don't think hazel, that's almost green. On a driver's license her shit should say brown. There is some golden color in there though.

>>16861992
>>16862006
Yeah I don't think it's hazel either but isn't it too light for brown?

>>16861963

>how do i build my entire life around marijuana

>>16861970
Not exactly. I enjoy smoking but doing what I do for a city is literally tearing my body up. I'm in so much pain I honestly can't walk right in the morning.

>>16861997

get a job that doesnt tear up your body. then you dont need weed. then you dont need a major that you can toke up with :^)

>>16861959
I have no idea what this vague ass thing you need to say is. BUT if you want to say it and run you should probably say it in person. Publicly if needed.

>but i don't wanna

Do what you want then.

>>16861967
I just need to apologise and growel, something like that can't be done in person because I'm ill and it's not very possible anyway cause the dude runs away whenever he sees me and I'm always too tired or sleepy to chase him. And people would talk.

eh, fuck it all.

up

>>16861956
>I only see her when I´m going back home from school
See her how? Have you talked to her before? If so you shouldn't have a problem "breaking the ice". Just talk to her. Pussies don't get pussy.

Talk to your Sangha

>>16861955
Suffer some serious SERIOUS shit and life is a joke.

>>16861955
What sorts of things have you already tried?

dude most customers escorts gets are lonely guys who just want to cuddle and have a little sex afterwards... well the decent escorts atleast... but would paying a prostitude to spend time with u really help? spend time with family instead or failling that, get a dog, a dog will force u to care for another being and focus on the happiness of sayed dog, also it will make u take walks and ppl love puppies and strangers will start talking to u to get to pet the puppy... if u play your cards right u will get some new contacts and maybe some sex.... long story short: puppy > prostitude

>>16862227
Or fucking ask a bitch out and challenge some fears instead of just hanging your head in resignation saying, 'welp, no use in trying im just bad"

>>16861950
OP don't be desperate. There will be a time you can spend those savings on something you like, or someone who earned your respect. You have worth and on your way in life you'll be able to form relationships if you act now.