Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6017. page

I just went through my bfs phone. He has kik, and he didn't have any active conversations. But I looked at his contacts, and most of them are quite clearly people from 4chan. Now one of these people had a topless pic. Should I be worried? I can't see how he's been interacting with these people, because he deletes his conversations. What are the chances he's exchanging nudes?

How do I get a grip of everything? I spend my days and nights dreaming about certain person, I don't do my work properly and can't do anything school related. I'm tired and anxious.

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First of all if indeed he is acquiring nudes, does this break the guidelines you have set for your relationship? It seems unlikely that this is the case. I believe we should delve more into your feelings of jealousy and insecurity that are coming into light through your anxieties.

stop saying S.O stupid faggot
what gender are you and what gender are they
>inb4 "Genderliquidsquirrelkin"

I'm a woman, he's a man.

>>16890709
You honestly couldn't figure this out? The entire OP post screams woman getting fucked but wants 10 hours of wooing prior.

>>16890312
Explain what he did

>>16890312

its been two years matette. if you did as good as you claim simply say 'thakns for the apology, enjoy your life <3' and never talk to him again.

after all wouldnt htat be great revenge? knowing hes coming back and you acting like its just a cute little apology as if none of it ever mattered at all?

>>16890319
I don't even know where to begin. Lies about almost everything imaginable, involving family members, deceased family members, fucking up my finances, trying to sabotage my job, pitting the whole town against me, trying to.pit estranged family against me, slept with my sister, all kinds of disgusting allegations. Consistently. For two years. There are people when I meet them for the first time who have some kind of impression of me from this guy. He's careful not to do any proveable damage but I have proof of everything anyway. Just for visceral satisfaction I suppose. I want to dx the shit out of him, all his numbers, army records, previous addresses, banking numbers.

>>16890324
You're right. When you're right, you're right. But right now I just feel need to indulge in this.

What do YOU want to do with your life?

Also are you sure this isn't a mid-life crisis?

>>16890247
>rare sweet disposition

this nigga married a pokemon

>>16890247

you got kids, so you kinda shot yourself in the foot there. im all about just starting over and seeking passion, but its hard when you are responsible for these two.

sucks that you dont love em.

It could decrease your erection quality

>>16889973
Pretty sure everything short of surgery is a scam. And even surgery doesn't pay off good either

if there were a good way to enlarge your penis everyone would know

>>16889787
does it make you feel emasculated?

> I don't know what to do.

Fall in love in her.
Travel the world
Get married, or don't.
Have kids, or don't.
Enjoy life.
Grow old together

Why does it matter if she's smarter than you?

>>16889795
Not OP but I tried dating an older woman with a master and while I was able to keep a conversation, I think she never saw me as an equal and went only after guys with lots of studies(I never went to college but am quite handy)

You're literally cucking yourself

I have no advice except to stop doing that

>>16888681
stop being a fucking child and enjoy the blowjob from your girlfriend

fucking insecure beta motherfuckers, goddamn

>>16888681
You just need to get over it man. If you can't get past this you will have this problem with every woman you date in the future.

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>>16888258
Thirsty af

No.

She's probably asleep still m8.
In a couple hours she'll wake up and crush all of your dreams.

>>16888100
They date ugly psycho whores. Go and find one.

>>16888100

if we are to assume that you are so awful that self improvement is the only way to get a gf, and by your own logic self improvement is a waste of time (which is inherently contradictory but whatever) than according to you, getting a girlfriend is a waste of time.

therefore you should not get one.

>>16888100
>I don't want to work on myself, because it's a waste of time.
OP, if working on yourself is a waste of time, then what isn't a waste of time?

>>16887777

>FWIW her dad was highly dysfunction bouncing between prison, homelessness, drugs, etc. wrecking lots of lives along the way.

bingo

It's not genetic, but your personality is pretty much shaped in your childhood, the older you get the harder it is to change

>>16887777
>20 years
>finally dawned
You're fucked homie

>>16887777
>What should I do? Is there therapy that can teach empathy? Or is it 100% genetic?
Nobody knows for sure, and I wish I had sauce, but my best understanding is that the majority of personality is genetic and/or learned before the age of 7. Traits and attitudes learned in early childhood are so hard to change that they almost might as well be genetic.

Short answer: If you can't deal with her like she is now, you need to leave her. If you don't want to leave her, you need to find some way to protect yourself and your kids from her sociopathic shit.

Longer answer: She is not going to change unless she wants to, and no matter how she tries, any true change is going to take years. Even if she suddenly sees the error of her ways and does a total 180, you have to remember that it is all on the surface and inside she is still the same person she was. Even if none of it is genetic and it's all childhood trauma shit from her dad, she would likely need years of therapy and/or self-work to come to the point where her past is not affecting her behaviour.

If you've been married 20 years I'm guessing she's about 38-45. I have known one or two people in their 40s/50s to admit they've been a jerkoff all their life and start turning their attitude around, but it's rare and I wouldn't count on it at all. Usually if they don't do it by 25 or 30 they're not going to. Maybe you leaving will be the catalyst that gets her to change. Maybe not. But don't stick around hoping it will happen in time to save your marriage and your sanity, because it won't.

Yes.

It's even more gay if you try and convince yourself it's not gay because you did it with a single person and you only did it because he was going through a rough patch in his life and you were always on top.

yes.

are you gay? probably. maybe not. but chances are you are going to go through a series of 'well this one didnt count cuz XX and this one didnt count cuz YY'

trust me i feel your pain. there's a large rush of 'im not gay but i have sex with men' because being gay is considered worse than ever. but sex with men isnt. people just dont want to be a faggot.

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probably not, you just happened to do a gay thing

>>16887580
Assuming you're male, why the fuck do you want to be hairless?

>>16887592
No im not going hairless I know that I need to shave my shoulders and back but I just wanted to see how far down i should shave on my arms and how far up on my legs. Like when I say shave I don't mean totally. More like a trim down I am hairy. Like for example I have hair that goes from my arm to the back of my hand is that too much? Should I get rid of the hair on the back of my hand?

>>16887597
Okay, unless your body hair is getting tangled, there is no need to trim. You're a man. Men are supposed to be hairy.

>>16887389
In my experience, most people stay in contact with a couple of good friends. Large groups don't usually stay together unless you all happen to go to the same college.

>>16887389
Of you aren't a normie you can't really make friends after high school. If you go straight to work, no one is really friends with coworkers. If you go to college, the normies form groups within a few nanoseconds and then it's game over. You can't make friends because unlike high school, you aren't forced into proximity with the same people for endless hours on end with nothing to do, so you can't really form any bonds.

>>16887389
well in my case i lost all my friends in highschool when i went to college and i went through a dark time like yours. What I did was find a job where i could get to interact with alot of people (i work for the library so i can adjust my time with people and alone time) and made close friends that way. I also started making small talk in my classes on people that seemed nice and now they've become good buddies with me that I eat lunch with whenever we're all free or something.

point is you gotta start making moves yourself instead of wallowing in self deprivation and loneliness because your group disbanded.

>>16887169
No. There is absolutely no way.

>>16887169
No. Pic related looks like filth incarnate.

>>16887169
My dealer has dreads. He's a cool guy dont hate

/B/ro just chill. Take it slow. It's never too late to make friends. I for one struggled for a while but you can only blame yourself. Find the root of the problem. What caused all this social anxiety?

>>16886827
OP here, my uncle used to molest me on family trips to Colorado. Do you think this might be related?

>>16886827
being really fat

but i've lost a tremendous amount of weight now so I thought it would be easier but it isn't because I still feel like i'm the 300lb guy and i'm now around 160lb