Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5937. page

>>16905795

>I have an accountability partner with whom I share my struggles and victories with, and who does the same with me. We're pretty close friends with like-minded motivations, so I know I can trust him.
>I look at gay porn about 50% of the time.

You guys should just be a couple

Be honest with him, give it to him slowly on a good day. If he's truly your friend, he'll be understanding. Best to tell him and have him hear it from you than to find out another way.

>>16905827
Haha, because of gay right?

>>16905829
I have a good week to figure out what I want to say to him - he's out of town for a while. I just felt convicted for somewhat lying to him. I know he'll be understanding and non-judgmental, but I'm super afraid he'll think differently of me afterwards. Like I really am gay or something, and the worst possible thing - that I'm attracted to him or something along those lines.

Just as another question, though, is what I'm doing typical of a person who may or may not have an addiction to pornography? It seems so weird to be into this kind of thing and not actually be gay. It's been going on for a while now - at least five years. When I was a teenager, I used to think I might've been gay, but when I realized I wasn't, it just left me more confused.

Now I chalk it up to the poison that is pornography and the way it twists the mind and sexuality, but that doesn't make it easier to quit. Hence my need for an accountability partner.

I don't know - I'm rambling. Thanks for the advice. I'll be honest and open with him.

Laws are applicable to your state. Check the Internet. Assuming you're in the US, and annotated code of your states laws should be freely available. Look for things involving wrongful firing. Although if they were self inflicted and are preventing you from working, it'll be tough man. Good luck.

>>16905774
>right to work state
no rights

But really, depends on what you mean. Self-inflicted like you put yourself in the hospital cause you took pills or are an alcoholic? Probably fucked.

Although some places will allow you to stay if you seek treatment.

>>16905786
It doesn't really PREVENT me from working but I understand how the whole perpetual flu and randomly dripping blood is probably a health risk, considering I handle food packages.

>>16905796
Self-harm. I've got cuts on my ankles and legs that keep rubbing open under my clothes, and like 3-5 of them are always kind of inflamed.

>>16905759
>I go to a counselor but i get too afraid to speak up about a lot of things.

So you like wasting your money?

> I have one friend who kind of helps me but i feel like our friendship will end soon

With the information you provided, it seems this is all in your head. Talk to the counselor about this AND the abuse.

OP, seriously man.

>>16905772
My mom put me in it
I'll talk to him about it.

>>16905759

ask yourself what you're trying to escape from.

ask yourself why you're afraid to talk to a paid professional listener.

ask yourself why someone who doesn't give a shit about you would yell at you for underperforming and pay money for you to talk to someone other than them about problems you probably have with them instead of talking about it with them in the first place. Seems like alot of effort for someone to not give a shit about you.

>>16905755
It doesn't matter if it's okay to anons on /adv/.

>implying I study

>>16905753
I just did the homework assignments multiple times a week. It worked OK.

why do people ask questions like this but never EVER post pics of themselves? How the fuck am I supposed to answer this when I have no idea what you look like?

>>16905737
Im generally considered unattractive. But makeup lets women overcome this so I believe I might be able to as well.

>>16905766
Expect that anything aside from very basic foundation is very noticeable, more so to women, and not considered attractive. So yeah, its "unfair" but you can't do shit about it. Life amirite?

>>16905692
own it.

"Be the tallest guy in the room and brag about how long your butt crack is." - The Prince of Persuasia

OK wear tight ass underwear, then boxers then swimming trunks and then wear fuxckin shorts then cargos then pants.
Or you can use a belt an be smart

I wouldn't spend any money on furniture, besides a bed.
Spend your money on shoes and your bed.
1/2 your life you'll be on your bed, the other half in your shoes.
Go hit up every single goodwill second hand stores for : a cheap coffee maker, microwave, dishes and cookware.
if youre a student, get a desk and a lamp, youll need it.
you don't really need furniture, unless family or friends decide to hand some down to you.
You get furniture when you can spend money on new and nice furniture that you don't plan on moving for a long time. aka you're married, started your career, and living in a home, not an apartment.

>>16905687
>>>>>/diy/

Nice bed, nice desk, nice kitchen supplies.
Its really not that expensive if you're working.

I'm currently living in an apartment with a blowup mattress and a lamp. Its honestly depressing to save your money for no good reason and live in a self imposed prison cell. The only reason I haven't gotten anything was because I'm moving in a month. But for the year I've been here, I should have made this feel more like home.
In other words, don't be greedy. Its not that much money in the long run.

She just wanted to fuck

>>16905672
so you go on the dates described, you walk her to her door where you exchange an awkwardish hug, and then what happens? please tell me you don't wait by your phone waiting for her to setup the next date

Women...there is no understanding or reason with their ways

Well obviously an apology or two to the people that got the worst end of shit stick. Theres a chance maybe like a couple might hold a grudge or some that'll remember you being a jerk and just be like "oh its that dick wonder if hes still the same" if you want you could just ignore it ever happened unless you bring it up to them I mean really theres a possibility that nobody remembers you at all.

>>16905654
Forgot to change /b/ to /adv

>>16905654
Got any more context? Why do you think you changed?

Based off the initial info, I'd say you need to go hang with people some more. Get out, do stuff. Try and boost your self-confidence. Be a more social person, practice with people you're comfortable with at first if you feel like it.

Nigga.

You haven't even met this girl in person yet? And it's been two months? And you're afraid of things moving too FAST?

Nigga.

If you really think it's a problem, turn off your screen and go outside. Really.

>>16905664
I should have mentioned she lives in NY and I live in CA and she's talking about me flying to visit her and I'm broke as shit since I had to buy a new car.

>>16905641

>I've been talking to this girl for a couple months now
>she is kind of getting too attached too soon

It sounds like you have no idea what you want, and you're just completely wasting her time. Not really a cool thing to do

>>16905589

Does she have stalkers or something?

If not, it's like, do you also worry about getting hit by a crazy drunk driver every time you get in the car? Do you worry about getting mugged every time you walk down the street? Do you worry about getting struck by lightning every time there's a rainstorm? Shit happens, do you best to be smart but don't let fear run your life

>>16905617
No it's just she's kinda ditzy and does stupid shit sometimes

But you have a very good point

>>16905589
Get into concealed carry and get her into guns problem solved.

If you consider this i can help you out, i did it for my girl and felt much better. She was all for it though and you may be in a diferent situation than me.

>she has just become more active

How, though? Like does she actually do substantial things to help these causes, or does she just talk about it all the time and scold people for making "offensive" comments?

>>16905592
Both. She goes to more events hosted by groups, asks me to come along, etc.
Shit comes up every day.

>>16905598

Try to work out some kind of compromise, maybe. Agree to go to an event with her every now and then, if she agrees to try not to "bring it home with her" and let politics wreck the mood when you're trying to spend time with her.

I mean, really at the end of the day it's just usual relationship stuff. Your partner has interests that you don't really care about, you go along with it a little bit just for the sake of sharing with them, and ideally they do the same for you