Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5827. page

>>16931454
If they're a Freudian psychologist they'll try to ask you questions that you don't like answering and try to get you to confess to having been raped by your father.

The more defensive you are the more they will persist, so the best thing to do is right off the bat let them know that you weren't raped by your father.

Your school might be different, but I went to my school's counselor about depression. There was walk ins on Mondays and I finally went a couple weeks ago. I was generally asked why I went in, she made sure I wasn't in danger of killing myself, and then we talked about my options since this isn't really something that is solved in a few visits. I don't want to talk to my mom about it and get health insurance from her, so I'll be paying per session. I haven't started those sessions yet.

It's not bad OP, you should go, especially if it's free

>>16931479
They're not allowed to tell your parents right?

>>16931406
your boyfriend seems pretty normal. Dreams are weird. Freud was a quack and psychology is a pseudoscience.

You're jealous of the relationship a man has with his mother? It's his mother for christ's sake.

Fuck, I would get super annoyed when my parents picked me up late from school, also. Especially in a time pre cell phones, you just sit there feeling like a fucking chump.

Sleeping in bed with your parents until you're in high school is weird, though, but he stopped that.

Dreams mean nothing, I had a dream, last week, about making out with the grown up version of a girl in my second grade class. I don't give a shit about her and haven't thought about her ever. Where did my brain get that? Who the fuck knows.

Calm down, stop being a judgmental cunt, and have a normal relationship with your boyfriend and his mother and everything will be fine.

>>16931475
He only stopped because she got married and her new husband found that really weird. After that, my boyfriend has really hated his step father. The step dad is really nice, but my bf feels like he took his mom away from him, He's 19, I think he's too old to be thinking that stuff. I don't know, man. I'm not being judgmental, I just feel like he has repressed issues.

why so mad?

>>16931370
If by trap, you mean its a trans girl, just treat her like any other girl and she'll love it.

If you mean a twink or really feminine guy, I can't help.

>>16931363
>Honestly don't know what to do with this info
uh, hire a guy to follow your wife silly. I did and got the evidence I needed the first day. The only reason you wouldn't want to know for sure is you don't want to know and have no intention on leaving

>>16931385
Hire a detective to confirm what you already know. Also call a lawyer to see how fucked you are, and to tell you what to do or not do so you can be less fucked.

Sorry man, that really sucks.

>>16931409
Yea, that was one of my thoughts. Thanks for your time anon

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>>16931345
>he doesn't know about H1B

Yes, getting a job after doing CS is retard-proof.

>>16931347

Elaborate? That's the visa that American companies use to bring foreigners to work for them right? How is that relevant here?

>>16931335

simply say

'why dont one or both of you call the landlord and let him make the decision'

one might chicken out. or they call. you wont go homeless from checking in. you'll lose a brownie point, but its only one brownie point and you can always make more brownies.

>>16931341
I'm just really fucking scare because this is our first place. One roommate just up and left leaving bills and practically all his stuff in his room (he got into weed and became crazy paranoid thinking everyone was out to get him)
Now the female roommate is super adamant on bringing her dog. This house is Victorian and so beautiful that I know this won't fly with the landlord and realtor.
The realtor is coming in to inspect the mess our male roommate made of his bedroom (we've only been here 2 MONTHS and he fucking ruined it). I'm afraid of bring this up, especially since my boyfriend is at the gym right now.

I'm just so tired of this drama. I guess I'll somehow bring this up to her....

>>16931361

you've gotta do something.

the best option is deffering to the landlord. its okay if he says no. that way your bf wins.

>>16931326
Dude, you'd be better off going on craigslist and finding some other white person who would let you co-op on rent or sublet a single room to you. Sure they'll rent to you in the ghetto, but it's the ghetto for a reason.

>>16931329
I'm not even rich enough for that I need roommates and to be in the ghetto

I had a friend who lived in a ghetto public housing building. He was white and had two roommates. I guess you just have to find where you can apply for that.

>>16931277

>being in a committed relationship for their lives.

this isn't really a thing since divorce became uber legal. even those who dont divorce lose that sense of commitment and end up becoming weird roommates who fuck. once passion fades you begin to feel like you are thrown together by circumstance, and try to live your life as best as possible with this person in the background. sure you wont bang other people if you're really good, but its kinda like having a business partner, or a sister you can bang.

all that being said, you are twenty, and wondering if your first real relationship is going to be the last one. maybe stop thinking about girls you date in terms of permanency. why bother? sure a year and a half is a long time, but in the grand scheme of life, its not a big deal at all. if life is a year long, you've been dating her for less than two weeks.

here is another quote for you
>something isn't beautiful because it lasts.

you can spend your life pursuing your goals and ambitions, and just meet great people (Even girls) along the way. you can enjoy them while its still possible to enjoy them, and then part ways once its time to move on, or once they are holding you back.

and that leads us to the REAL question anon. how is this woman holding you back? you act as if all goals and all relationships are created equal. you are creating broad generalization.

what is it that you want to do that she wont let you? how? why?

>>16931277
>Can a person have a fulfilling personal life, while being in a committed relationship for their lives?
Yes. In fact, it's not uncommon for people to find fulfillment in their relationship with their significant other.
>however some things about the relationship make me feel as if it's holding me back
Yes, sacrifices have to be made in the real world. You can't have your cake and eat it too. If these things are truly incompatible, and you can't make these things work, then you need to make a decision. Pick one, stick with it, and don't dwell on "what ifs" because it will only get in the way of your enjoyment of life. If you picked the right thing, you probably won't find yourself lamenting about the life you didn't have.
>Can you really have a mix of both /adv/? Or am I signing my life away to a lifetime of mediocre security and stagnancy?
Yes, look at nearly every successful person in the world, and you will see that most of them are married, or have been. You can also have neither, and be a boring lonely person who has done nothing with their life.

You know, the more I read, the more I think the issue stems with you. Have you once talked to her about your goals? Is she dissuading you, or actively getting in your way? Are you coming here because you've exhausted all your options already, or are you wanting someone to make your decisions for you?

Well it's really just socially that I feel held back, sometimes I feel like I have to hang out with her all of the time, like she would be understanding though if I want to do something with someone else, and I just have dreams of traveling the world, and she says she wants to travel too I suppose that's good

>fucking sluts
Don't bother.

You're a slut too, fuck you.

Generally you want to use photos of you taken by other people. Mix up pictures that were planned with pictures that people just took randomly. The big issue is that most people don't have pictures like this, and you can't really fake them. You have to go do things with your life.

When talking to people, keep your conversations really casual and fun. Don't try to get all deep right away. I'd rather say something like "Whoever invented corndogs was a goddamn genius" than "Who do you prefer, Camus or Sartre?"

Also don't take it too seriously. A lot of chicks on Tinder don't really have any intention of meeting the people they match with in real life. It's just fun to talk to strangers sometimes. I like to think of it like Omegle except you're always talking to attractive people.

There are tinder help threads on soc all time, you're better off asking there.

>>16931178
They sound like pricks OP, utter and total pricks. They sound like assholes who still think women can't play tabletop games and need to keep to doing they're hair or sucking dick

If they don't want to play games with you cause your a gitl you have 2 options
1-stay on, show them what you can do and tough it out, maybe they'll get better
Or
2.drop these bastards and make your own gaming club where all are welcome, the better option

I'll never understand groups of gamers who dislike female players, I'm sick of only playing with other dudes and these assholes are the reason for it.

Drop these dicks and then blow their shot club out of the water

>>16931215
Ignore the name I'm a dumbass amd not OP

Forgot to become anon

>>16931215
Sounds good Anon will do

>>16931161
Just do your god damn homework.

Jesus christ.

>>16931452
I'm not in school. I do blue collar work.

>>16931161
just say you are depressed and check into a mental ward. you'll meet some pretty interesting people and if you play your cards right youll get laid with the one 6/10 psycho chick

>>16931142
tfw simplest thing but no help
:-:

all by myself

o_0

Start training her for a life of domestic servitude. She sounds well suited to it.

>>16931130
Even if she was, we wouldn't be able to afford doing that. I don't have the money to support two people, and the job I have now is realistically the best I could get under my circumstances and the one most likely to allow me to get promoted and eventually make more.

There isn't much in the way of other things I can cut out, either. I already live frugally.

As someone who also was in a long distance relationship and just moved across the country to be with my boyfriend, I'd be pissed if he decided to break up with me a couple months later over something like this. If you'd break up with her so soon, you weren't serious enough about her to warrant her moving in the first place.

I'm not saying she's not in the wrong at all, if the reason she got fired was her attitude she needs to straighten up, act like an adult and not let that be an issue at her next job. But while you may not be married, there is a level of commitment now that she's left everything behind to move in with you. Don't be a douche and kick her out already, try and work through it first.

I get money is tight, but maybe you should have thought about that and saved up before she came, don't you think? I wanted to move in with my boyfriend several months ago, but realistically we knew that would be stupid and so we waited so we could each save up a lot of money. Because if I wasn't able to find a job immediately, we wanted to be able to be okay for a few months until I did.

But there's nothing you can do now about the fact that neither of you seem to have properly prepared for this. You need to either decide she's worth it, be firm with her (but still supportive) about getting a new job ASAP or if you really care that little then alright, send her packing and don't get into another relationship until you're able to deal with things like this. Shit happens, but don't drop her over that. How would you feel if the roles were reversed and she left you for losing your job? Wouldn't you feel like she was only using you for your money and saw no worth in you beyond that? Like if you couldn't split the bills with her you're useless? That's not a relationship.

Talk to her, make it clear this is serious and she needs to do something about it as soon as she can. Even a minimum wage job is better than nothing while she looks for something better.

hold breath

>>16931099
Basically take longer building up to it. If I drew a chart expressing it there'd be pretty much a 1:1 ratio between the pleasure and intensity of an orgasm and the time I spent working on it.

Exercise is good too.

Are you male or female? Are your orgasms unsatisfying.

>>16931091

not unless I'm in fucking grade 5

>>16931091
it hurts a bit I wont lie but its weird, one of the pics my gf took like that is now my favorite pic of her

I think theres probably something in a guy that erases all the bad stuff once he likes a girl enough

By bad do you mean just unflattering or something like a photo of you shitfaced at a party? If the former, I guess it depends on the photo but I might get a bit suspicious that you're hiding something with makeup. But it's probably fine, if I like you as a person then it doesn't matter a whole lot if you don't look pretty all the time. If the latter, I will lose respect for you and probably won't be interested in you anymore.

Why don't you just take down the photo if you hate it so much?