I have a boyfriend and the end of the month is our one year. I love him, but the only problem is that I am starting to feel a little more then friendly love towards my best friend. Whenever I get near him I get sexual frustrated like ever time I am near them, is this normal? Should I just try to kill my feelings for him away?
>>16942054
>I don't know what to do with my life
end it, remember, you need to be above the 7th floor to guarantee death when you jump
I will remember that when I completely die on the inside.
>>16942054
If it was the other way around and your bf, who you love, had feelings for a close female friend - would you want him to leave you for her or stop talking to her altogether? Be honest.
Hey, /adv/, just want your opinion on something. So I have a very low libido, apparently. Or at least, one that needs a lot of work to turn on. This situation is partially what ties into my not really having a sex life with my bf. See, I'm not sexually attracted to him. Like, at all. He is really attracted to me, though.
I have tried helping him out in various sexual situations--although I have put my vagina and ass off limits, I try to give him oral, hj's ect.. However, a lot of them haven't resulted in him cumming or anything like that. He, most of the time, ends up going soft. And I'm pretty much disinterested in him trying to do anything sexual with me. I really like the kisses and stuff like that, but thinking about him putting his mouth near my vagina is not appealing. He's tried using his fingers but literally every time he's done it wrong--no matter how much I've tried to help him in that regard. That's getting kind of frustrating.
Anyway, regarding the sex stuff...he says that it's because he feels his body's waiting for piv sex first. Eventually, I offered to give it to him (We're both virgins, and I was going to wait until marriage but this issue has been going on for a while) once I graduate college in less than 2 months, but I keep getting cold feet about the whole thing. I worry about the possibility of pregnancy (I don't take birth control, for obvious reasons) and if I could support a kid--I don't want to do an abortion. My bf is kind of between jobs atm, but he's promised me that if anything happens he'd do his best to support me.
I kind of want to hear what /adv/ has to say about this. You guys have helped me out a lot. Should I stick to my moral principles and wait? Or should I give it up? Or should just I do my best to get better at oral/hand sex for him?
I really care about him, he's been like a best friend to me. I just want him to be happy.
Why do you have such a low interest?
>>16942031
Generally, I'm not all that sexually attracted to anyone. Some movies like Magic Mike have had an effect, and I do seem to get "the tingles" a bit when I look at nude women, but I've never "gushed" or anything like that over people in real life. Never wanted to ride the cock carousel, as /r9k/ would say, which definitely helped with my personal abstinence pledge.
But related to him, a good part of it is because of his appearance, I think. He's always been overweight (short too, but as I'm 5'2 it has never bothered me). He doesn't look like he takes care of himself all that much, I guess?
>>16942023
>See, I'm not sexually attracted to him. Like, at all.
That's weird, you know that right?
It suggests to me that you don't really see him as boyfriend material. When I read your story it sounds like you more see him as a cute needy kid than as husband material.
Are you older than him?
>/adv/ considers the /r9k/ stereotype to be a universal truth.
>all the people who suck at romantic and sexual relationships are exactly like the stereotype
How can you develop a healthy mindset if you believe this?
>>16942007
Adv is the polar opposite of /r9k/
Adv believes in dating single mothers and bringing up other men's children.
>>16942007
>>/adv/ considers the /r9k/ stereotype to be a universal truth.
Not quite. The /r9k/ stereotype only becomes universally true once the redpillers get their claws into a person and bitterness sets in.
People who suck at relationships, but have not yet become embittered, are a diverse lot. Their problems are still self-inflicted; that much IS universal. But there are lots of different problems one might have, and just as many ways to fix them.
But once bitterness sets in, the way they got there ceases to matter. The bitterness very quickly overpowers all other factors, and that's thr point when the stereotype becomes a universal truth. You cannot fix the problems of an bittered person without first fixing the bitterness, which is why we focus on that.
>How can you develop a healthy mindset if you believe this?
This IS the healthy mindset.
>>16942027
>Adv believes in dating single mothers and bringing up other men's children.
/adv/ sees nothing wrong with doing this, but it's quite a logical leap from seeing nothing wrong with the idea to "believing in it". To be the polar opposite of /r9k/ in this regard, we would have to actively encourage it. We do not, though we do not discourage it either. It's just another dating pool.
Crossthread from /fit/ for more application-based advice
My local town is looking for volunteer firefighters, and this is something I very much want to do. I'm 6'5 and large, I want to give back to my community and be of service to others. To do what Woods said, to be willing to do what others cannot.
I have a good mindset for this position. I approach things very tactically and with energy directed where it's needed- a real almost polarized 'N' type- and many people confirm that I'm one of the best drivers anyone's ever seen at 18, good ability at knowing the situation around me and seeing what could go wrong. (From flight sims for the past 11 years.)
I'm very good at supporting others so that they can achieve their own assignments faster, and building everyone else up for better performance. And I'm anal about communication, good at it.
(I'm pretty sure I can get a reference from my old Sup, who I'm on very good terms with, as to these things. He was ex-military, and I'm probably close to military in my mindset.)
What kind of fitness requirements do you think they will require for me to be available, and how hard would it be to get there? I'm wanting to start training very soon. I'm strongfat right now but I do a lot of physical work for a living, 5 days a week, 4.5 to 5 hours a day. Cardiowise, I think I'm probably close.
Thanks.
Pic not related
>>16942004
Well in my country the basic fire fighter test is 2km run pull ups and push ups .
>>16942004
pretty much, could you pick up someone with equal or more body weight than you?
but i would do a little research...
>>16942353
If I had to.
I have done research but never found specifics, that's why I'm here.
>>16942081
>2km run pull ups and push ups.
You don't sound very coherent.
From this it
>implies
that the requirements are that you be able to do a pull up and a push up.
This is murica, I don't think it's that bad. I've heard from /fit/ there are volunteers who look like walking heart attacks already, the dept. was desparate enough to put out a big banner for recruitment.
I don't see one of these active right now, so.
I am someone with a pretty well off life. I have been accepted into medical school, have responsibilities within my life, a solid group of friends, engaged, and I pride myself on my personal logical consistency.
Give me your problems, and I will give you advice.
>I don't see one of these active right now, so.
Look harder. Can't be bothered to broach my problems to some kid who can't even skim the catalog.
What do I do about the fact that everything I try in life seems to be an attempt to stave off the inevitable boredom and apathy which naturally comes on with age, hormonal changes and the loss of libido?
I'm haunted by the notion of the male ego which has given up, yet acceptance seems just as hollow. I feel like fighting against it is basically denying the reality of ageing and the loss of potential and possibility brought on by the competitive nature and insecurity of youth.
I accept that the leading cause of death in men under the age of 50 is suicide and I can kind of see why. I suppose the only reason why it stops after the age of 50 is because it self selects either those who have come to terms with existence or have found something I have yet to find.
>>16942009
Difference between being in the catalog and being actively posted on. Married oldfag started his thread up again at about the same time that I posted this, so.
But it seems like your problem might be some obvious unnecessary aggression, and you should work on finding healthy outlets.
>Girl I like
>She knows this, no question about that
>No idea if she likes me -- I'm getting some next level shit of mixed signals from her.
>Jump to this weekend. She invites me to this spinning/fitness class she's running (to join/check out her class basically)
>Don't go
>Apologize latter that night on fb with your standard excuse.
>Seen
>No response since yesterday
What should I do? Should I just act like I don't give a fuck and leave it at that? Or should I beg for her forgiveness on my knees or something? Does she even care?
Ask her out to make it up, for you not showing up on spinning class.
Being slightly cynical, don't forget the idea that she might've invited you to that class for the sake of having people in there.
>>No idea if she likes me
I have an idea. The answer is no.
Do you not realize that women also experience the feeling of enthusiasm? Think about how you'd feel if you knew that a girl you fancied was also into you. You'd jump on that straightaway. It would be obvious to everyone.
See how she's not doing that despite being well aware of your feelings? She's not into you. End of story.
What should I get my wife's son for his 7th birthday?
Previous we just bought him stuffed toys and a few board games, but I feel this is the age where we should move on from that, although clearly he's too young for a smartphone and stuff like that
>my wife's son
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=appropriate+gift+for+7+year+old+boy
My son is 5 and since kids change their mind so often at that age i just resort to taking him to toys'r'us on his bday. Usually he chooses lego. Maybe some lego technic or a science/experimenting set?
>>16941982
Some kind of build-something kit that will be a little challenging but not too hard
so I worked a 10 hour shift yesterday (11am - 9pm) and was out all night. had a few beers at the local bar and ended up doing a bag of some white girl one gram approximately. Haven't slept at all since and now I have another 11 - 9 in a few hours due to my coworker calling out. I'm exhausted and still wide awake. what can I do to help me from not passing the fuck out and feeling like shit which I already have started.
>>16941976
stop working at dunkin donuts
>>16941976
get more coke
duh
>snort pepper
>go to work sneezing your ass off
>you already look like shit from being up all night
>now you look like you have a cold
>show up
>boss takes one look at you and sends you home
>go home, sleep it off
>stay away from coke in the future, it's not good for your body
Hey guys so im asking this girl to prom and i was wondering how you guys think i should ask her shes into star wars alot
>>16941958
Come back when you're 18, you know the rules.
>>16941958
dont do a grand romantic gesture thats loser type stuff just casually ask her in a conversation
>>16941960
I am 18
My parents regret having kids and my depression is killing me. How should I commit suicide?
>>16941941
you are not their only kid, right?
>>16941959
yep. but they seem to regret all of us so honestly I don't think they'd be too upset.
It's not your fault they're bad parents.
Do I have a problem /adv/?
I've just come out of an intervention set-up by my roommates and my gf (of one week). Turns out they weren't happy with my drinking habit. I was doing a 700ml of scotch-whiskey and a six-pack of beer every day for the past three weeks because I was stressed out with work, but haven't had anything to drink the past three days.
I feel like going to a bar/pub after hearing all that sad shit.
You tell me. Is it a problem?
Are you looking for an alternative to drinking? Justification for it? Tips to quit? What do you want from us, anon?
>>16941911
Some people need to lose a lot more shit before they sober up. I dont think you've fucked your life up enough yet, go hit that bar, son. Come back when you know you're an alcoholic and your life is a mess you can't handle.
>Get a random facebook request
>Some grill
>Never seen her before
>Save image
>Google search
>Picture is all over the place, the girl is some random edgy looking model
>Know the person that just added me isn't her, since the account was new and had like 30 friends
>"Don't know why you're adding me with a fake account, but whatever"
>They see it and instantly block me after I said that
Weird thing is, whoever they were, they are adding people with the same last name as me. And my last name is really uncommon, and even spelled in the original and even more uncommon way.
Minutes after thy blocked me, they tried to get into my account. Facebook gave me the IP, and it originates from right around where my crazy ass ex lives, like the exact block. We broke up, because she essentially had a mental breakdown, went nuts, ran away with some dude, then reality hit her and she came running back. Only I didn't want her back after she had been with that dude.
So should I confront her about the whole, making fake accounts and trying to log into my facebook thing? She is pretty unstable most of the time, so I don't know.
I think you should sue her desu, this is creepy
>>16941900
Identity theft is fucking serious. Confront her. Also, use a strong password. I like LastPass, now my passwords are just a random string of characters.
>>16941910
All my passwords are 20+ characters and hidden in a small book inside my desk, that she hasn't ever seen. I'll call her today.
How honest can you be with people, knowing most people aren't as dickish as some of the people on here?
I have social phobia and I'd like to just tell people to stop them jumping to conclusions, so they understand and hopefully are more forgiving of my awkwardness.
What you get online is basically people without the filter that social convention applies.
Their internal thoughts are likely just as dickish, but how they express those thoughts publicly are moderated by their fear of how others with perceive them and the resulting loss of status or validation.
Also people often aren't as great at having to feel bad as they think. Words, inflection, body language etc all apply a significant amount of non-verbal communication which will modify their initial or subsequent actions.
As you start to remove the consequences or separate the empathic human connection from interactions the filter can fade a little. Like you are unlikely to point something out directly to a person, but you might shit talk them when they go to the bathroom amongst the group because they are no longer there.
In terms of 'honesty' this is all subjective. I'd advise not disclosing things which will make you feel uncomfortable to people who will make you feel uncomfortable. I don't know the theory of it all, but other people go on about safe spaces.
I can't tell the asshole guys at work anything because they'll fuck me over with it just for fun. Some might say "what a shame", but seriously, it'd be my own dumb fault to give them any ammunition.
Equally some of my super PC friends are actually quite insidious and vulture like. They crave connection and inside information and act in a certain way to prompt disclosure in order to gain information which validates their perception of being super friends. That sucks more than the assholes at work.
>>16941913
>I'd advise not disclosing things which will make you feel uncomfortable to people who will make you feel uncomfortable
This seems like a pretty good rule of thumb.
Thing is, everyone makes me uncomfortable. The better I know them, the less often they do, but they still do.
>>16941888
There is no need to tell people your problems.
If you have a friend you're comfortable with, and he suggests going someplace (a party, or group) where you're likely to be uncomfortable, you can say something like "I'm really uncomfortable in situations like that. I'll come, but stick close to me until I begin to relax."
Ok so I'm a useless piece of shit. I am studying a bachelor degree, I want to join the army as a rifleman when it's over.
Any tips on how I can get into the mindset to do so? I may have autism so it's likely I'll fail
Any army stories?
>>16941880
Join the reserves as some kind of officer or something.
Only Forrest Gump types do well in field environments. If you're autistic, shy, and timid, you will just get in the way.
Nearly every single person I've known who joined the army did so because they thought it was a cure for being an insecure worthless piece of shit. Nearly every one of them came out just as insecure and worthless, but filled with all kinds of obvious lies attempting to make themselves seem self big and important due to having been in the army. Quite a few of them then resort to "the army is the reason why my life is such a fucking mess".
I knew one dude who joined the army and made it work and I think he'd have been a cool dude irrespective of what he did.
I think it is a common issue for young men who lack direction and think you can find direction through the self image of another. As usual I'd advise dealing with the root issues instead of trying to mask them or cover them up.
Nothing wrong with the army either, just as long as you make the decision based on the actual pro's and con's for you within your situation instead of some fantasy.
>>16941880
Join the Army. Travel the world. Meet strange and exotic people. And kill them.
Is a 4 year bachelor's degree in statistics a good thing to have?
It's really the only subject I have any sort of "passion" for, and the only one I truly care about.
My ultimate goal is to work in the finance sector, preferably in banking or as an analyst of some kind, but I feel more compelled to pursue a B.S. in statistics than I do in business or accounting.
Thoughts?
look into becoming an actuary
>>16941871
That's also another career I'm considering because there are so many different opportunities in it, and it has much faster than average job growth according to the BLS.
>>16941871
>>16941879
Do you think a BS in statistics would stand up to a BS in mathematics or computer science?