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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5793. page

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I've tried other forums online, but they are slow to respond if at all, at least here I know people are active and jump in, so let's begin


what is a fool proof measure of suicide?

By way of background, I have 5 herniated discs in my lower lumbar region. I am suffering with constant chronic debilitating pain, 24 hours straight, for the past year and a half.

I have been to doctors who refuse to do any kind of surgery, and only prescribe weak ass drugs that don't do anything for me, despite me telling them flat out that they do not work.
per day i'm on:
1800 mg of neurontin
1500 mg nuabumetone
400 mg tramadol
not to mention weak ass sertraline 100 mg which only makes me feel worse.

these do absolutely fucking nothing, and if I take extra, the pain remains but i get sleepy but can't sleep.

I'm alone 90% of the time as my 12 year old is always at school or friends house, so I have plenty of time to set up.

I'm not sure about hanging/asphyxiation because its possible that it won't be adequate to kill me and i'll just suffer brain damage

I have no gun, no access to any serious medication

Any helpful suggestions on how to swiftly and permanently end this shithole pain filled life I'm trapped in?

Please don't waste my time with "you have so much to live for" or "things will get better" or any of that bullshit. It's not true. I just want some serious, helpful advice on easy and permanent suicide solutions using easy to access items.
18 posts and 2 images submitted.
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You have a 12 year old? You know killing yourself will ruin your kid's life, right?
>>
Unfortunately those two methods are some of the easiest and most effective. Do not overdose on medication, it is why females have such a low suicide success rate.
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>>16942581
he can go live with his mom
his life will be better without me

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Every time I shit there's a little bit left inside that doesn't come out and my ass stings and itches all day. Should I change diet
4 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16942550

- wipe with wipes instead of tp, they are better for digging into your butt after the turdling (dont put wipes down the toilet though)
- shit right before a shower and fish that little puppy out with your fingers
- have some patience on the can and keep pushing till you get the whole thing out
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>>16942550
usually, when I feel a shitstorm coming, i try to wait as long as possible before i hit the toilet


if i were to shit at first onset, it would be all loose and watery... however, if i wait a few hours, it gets all tight and compacted and slides out smooth as silk with a clean break

but definitely use wet wipes instead of tp... its fucking 2016
>>
>>16942550
Fuck that, I sit on the toilet until that little shit comes out.

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i'm a 23 years old guy with a hawk nose like adrien brody (pic related) and i have always considered myself as "ugly af".
i don't have serious self confidence problems,but i definitely don't rely on my physique to get close to girls.i'm currently at university,and i feel like i'm being "liked" by few girls in my entourage (they initiate conversations,laugh at random things that i say,etc).two hot girls already told my that they like the way i talk and move.i have been also in a situation to have eye contact with a girl that was staring at me.
so is it possible that a girl like all my other physical features (tall,soft black hair,small eyes,ectomorph with broad shoulders,deep voice),and find me physically attractive,knowing that i have a big disgusting goblin nose ?
18 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>16942540
hey man, no one can be perfect just be glad its just ur nose, notice how the women liked the way that you talked
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>>16942540
The appropriate term is "Jew nose." "Hawk nose" is offensive to hawks. They don't have noses anyway, they have beaks or bills.
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>>16942540
As someone with a suspiciously kike-like nose I can tell you everyone I've ever been with fit into one of three categories:
1.) They were attracted to my nose
2.) They didn't like it, but came to love enough that they stopped caring/found it attractive
3.) They didn't notice/give a fuck
Stop fussing. Big noses build character.

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I was thinking of buying a cheap spring shotgun to get into airsoft. iv already played a bit with rented guns and i like the game alot. Im just not sure if i should make the jump for a $300 AEG or play around a little more with a $40 shotgun.?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16942519
the shotgun sucks and doesnt hurt as much as the pistols, not the lame battery operated kind either.
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Don't
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>$40
guaranteed shit

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I dont know what to do guys, I just dont know.
Im currently a majorless freshman at a community college. I want to be a teacher. I just talked to my counselor, she said, being that Im a guy, I would have the best chance at finding a job if I go into math/science.

The thing is, I hate math and sciences. Ideally, Id want to teach history, but when it comes to secondary education it is apparently better to dual major, I want that secod major to be something that has a good job outlook if teaching doesnt work out.
Right now Im heading down Biology, but Im not sure thats what I want.
I dont know what to do guys, this is my future here, I cant fuck this up.
4 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Your counselor is sexist. You can be whatever kind of teacher you want.

Just try classes all over the board (within reason) and see what you find most interesting. You can't force a long-term interest. It will eat at you if you do.
>>
desperate bump
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>>16942516

The worst thing is to study something you hate. Then the odds are against you and even if you finish it, you will hate your work too.

If you want to study history with teaching in mind, combine it with something similar or with something else you like.

> I hate math and sciences
> Im heading down Biology
You gonna hate it after 1 semester.

Try to find online how many jobs for teachers are currently open in your country / location. This can give you clear idea which path can pay off when you finish study.

Don't study something what you hate.

Being with gf for 3 years.
Started contacting scorts like 4 months ago for new experiences.
did it like twice a month until Febr. That last time girl was specially nice and her look 8/10. I really could not took her out of my mind.
Wanted to hired her again but she told me she was not in the business anymore. Sadface.jpeg. kept on with my life. Two weeks ago I found her while walking down the street, She smiled and I smiled back. None of us said anything. That night she whatsapp me "I saw u today :)" (surprised me knowing she had kept my number). We started chatting along and had a date next day. Not necessary to say that gf knows nothing about this. Been knowing the girl more and she's actually not working as a escort anymore. Got a job at a hair salon and is doing fine.
After dating her three times we had sex. It was wonderful, no money involved. She said she liked it and wants to repeat it.
We have fun together and we spend lots of time on the phone.
Guys I think I'm falling in love with this girl. What to do? Pic not related.
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>>16942439
>falling in-love with a literal whore
lmao
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>>16942444
Can't stop it.
>>
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>>16942447
its easy actually
just delete her and you're good to go
fuck your gf hatefully and you'll forget everything

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My neighbor has been sun bathing after swimming recently. She so fucking sexy and I've honestly jerked off to her from my window while she sun bathing.

How do I tell she I like her without making myself look creepy. She's 6 years younger than me.
12 posts and 2 images submitted.
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You don't tell people you like them. There's nothing they can do with that information. Instead you give them an opportunity to like you too. Talk to her when you see her around, tell her about some fun stuff you plan on doing and invite her to join you. There's something she can actually do with an invitation.
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Wait until you turn 18, then take your birthday confidence and confess your love.
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i need to see some ID??

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Alright /adv/ it's story time. Got something that's been kinda fucking with me for the last 15 years. Will green text, of course.

>Be me
>9 years old
>Bit of a nerd
>Act a lot like Double D from Ed, Edd, n Eddy
>Little brother is 7
>summer time
>Used to live next to a park with four T-ball diamonds
>Make friends with this 15 year old neighbor girl
>Hang out just about every day
>Mostly playing PS2 or riding bikes
>Little brother has a T-ball game
>Bored because little kids suck at baseball
>Girl suggests we go back to the house and play
>Mom is watching game
>Sneak off to house
>Decide to play truth or dare
>Get dared to show her my dick, which I do
>Dare her to make out, which we do
>Truth time
>Asks me if i would ever fuck her
>Panic while spilling spaghetti all over bedroom floor and say no
>Continue to make out
>Hear a knock at the front door
>Throw girl off of me and run downstairs
>It's my grandma wanting me to go to the game with her to see my brother
>Leave with grandma while girl is still in my room
>Girl sneaks out a few minutes later
5 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16942430
Cont.

>Fast forward about a month
>Girl, brother, and I are hanging out at empty T-ball park, trying to break into closed concession stand to get candy
>Can't get in
>Bored
>My fucking 7 year old brother suggests we have sex
>Girl says ok
>Start to spill spaghetti again
>In my best Double D voice, stammer, "If you tell anyone, I'll never speak to you again!"
>Walk over to this big set of bushes behind the park where girl used to go hide so she could smoke
>I'm first
>We get naked
>Start to rub dick on her pussy
>Never stick it in
>Girl says she can't feel anything
>Spaghetti is literally pouring out of me
>Say I can't either
>Get dressed and walk away
>Little brother's turn
>Motherfucker actually fucks her
>Only with her a few minutes
>Comes out from bushes grinning ear to ear
>Tell him let's go back to the house and play PS2
>Girl leaves
>Don't see girl again for three years
>See her at a Ryan's steakhouse
>Lock eyes for a few minutes
>She looks horrified
>Runs out of restaurant
>Never see her again.

So, /b/, that was the day where I almost lost my virginity at age 9, but my alpha as fuck 7 year old brother fucked a 15 year old.

Been thinking about this a lot lately, and I'm starting to wonder if it's the reason why I've always had issues talking to females and why I think I may have a pron addiction. Thoughts?
>>
It takes a lot to muster up the guts to spill something like that. My advice: make sure you get it /all/ out, no matter how embarrassing or disgusting you may feel (remember: you are not expected to feel these feelings, but they are a thing nonetheless).

Perhaps that girl took advantage of you. She was the older one, and was probably (assuming from her age) either going through or already past puberty.

I had been sexually abused as a child (age 3-12) on a regular basis, by the same man (I'm a female, just so you know). When I was 13 I promised myself I would take that secret to the grave. When I was 16 I became more intimate with my boyfriend, and told someone.

I'm in my late 20's now, still picking up the pieces. My current partner knows pretty much all of what happened (though I did not recount each and every 'episode' as there were so many).

I felt 'dirty' for a long time, and 'ruined,' but today I feel like an actual, autonomous person. I've let it go, for the most part.


Holding onto the past, I've found, only keeps you from being in the present.
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>>16942460
I'd suggest seeing a therapist...but not longer than you feel is necessary. Just enough time to get it out.

Working with a meditation teacher has helped me process a lot of difficult thoughts and feelings.

Maybe you're suppressing the negative feelings you have about this situation. I'd say, focus on those and feel those (only with intention), and let them pass through your body. Sounds cheesy, but it's worked for me.

Ages 7-13 are quite important for young males.

Maybe try reading "Sex at Dawn" by Christopher Ryan. He talks about that stuff a lot.

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I'm addicted to masturbation, like today alone I've done it 4 times, it's 2pm here. what are good ways to not do this? I want to make sure I'm not having sex for 3+ hours with my girlfriend when we do have sex so I need help.
12 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>16942425
trying to remove a bad habit ends in failure
instead try to grab a good habit that'll take the time
what are you interested in? how do you spend your time?
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>>16942425
dont touch your dong
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>>16942437
I play video games, work, study for college, and friends.

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How do I clear my head?

I have countless doubtful thoughts, view & review things from multiple angles, and think myself in circles...to the point where it's debilitating. I have difficulty making up my mind.

This all started when I was a kid. I was the youngest of four (by a large gap), and was continually ignored. I was also taken advantage of by my stepfather, during which I would remain silent and escape mentally through dissociation. It's almost as if I have learned to think in dualities...as in, I'll be present and perhaps having a conversation, but also analyzing--in the back of my mind--how the words are coming out of my mouth, or thinking about all of the things I have left to do, or wondering what the other person is thinking, or whatever's happening around me.

One of my therapists had said I have 'learned ADD' though she did not suggest how to unlearn it. I'm thinking there's something to this...I have /tried/ meditation, and I have read countless books, essays...watched movies and videos otherwise, as well as listened to lectures on mindfulness.

It's as though I'm capable only of observation. Friends have tried to suggest things to me...telling me not to think and just to do...I always find myself back here, thinking myself in circles...I feel like I just haven't found the right 'key' yet.

how2fokus?
17 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Hoping to get an answer on this as well.
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>>16942421
I make it sound so extreme. Truth is, the only times I have been able to calm my mind down is by doing drugs. LSD, MDMA, and marijuana have helped me 'normalize' my brain to the point where I'm thinking singular thoughts...I haven't done a whole lot of the first, two drugs mentioned, but there was a period of about 4 years in my later teens during which I would rarely go a day without smoking weed.

I don't do drugs very often these days--mayyyyybe smoke weed once a month, and the others sparingly, if at all--so that's not the issue.
>>
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bump

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Hey,

I have a bunch of empty liquor bottles that I've been collecting mostly just because I thought it'd be funny to scatter them around my room and take some pictures. However, after I'm done this, I don't really have a plan for them other than "throw them in the recycle bin".

Is there anything I can do to get some cash for these guys? There's probably around 50-ish, but unfortunately some of the latest additions have been cheap, plastic bottles because Vlad is cheaper than Luksusowa. My state doesn't have a bottle bill, and I think I'd lose money overall if I drove to one that did, so I'm just wondering if anyone knows something I could do with these.
5 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Not really, no. Maybe some of the plain glass bottles can be converted into art if you have colorful sand and stones laying around. The rest, especially plastic, are worthless though.
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...they're just trash now, OP. Unless you want to do some crazy candle art of course.
>>
Google "Bottle Village"

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I have a really weak stomach. Weaker than a little french school girl. I can't eat every much because at a certain point I just start gagging. I can't do exercises because if I do too much (which is not a whole lot) I start gagging.

Also, I like to sing in the car, but if I exert too much force I start gagging. Usually when I wake up early in the morning my stomach is hurting bad, and it takes awhile for it to settle down, I also feel like I should be gagging too.

Is there a way to improve this? I asked /fit/ but they just told me to kill myself.
4 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>16942363
>I have a really weak stomach. Weaker than a little french school girl.
Most people have weaker stomachs than a little French schoolgirl. Seriously; have you seen some of the things they eat?
>>
Sounds like an issue for your family doctor
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>>16942907
Frenchfag here
Our lil girls are much tougher than your tiny stomach
Also check em

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What are some good opening line(s) to try sending to girls on dating sites when their profile is completely empty? I'm good at messaging girls with stuff in common, but not the girls with empty profiles.
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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ayyyy yo bitch u want sum fukk?
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all bots bro, dont do it
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>>16942361
Hello is usually a good one but anything said with confidence usually works out alright

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How do i get better at sex? gf likes it rough, so do i but ive been really vanilla past few years. can never find the perfect middle. either im too rough and its uncomfortable, doing too much or half ass cant really call it rough.

im loss. rough by my standards is typical choking, hair pulling, hard thrust. but too her its too rough. be more gentle but rough. i dont get it

how do into females idea of rough?
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16942335
Have you asked her what she means by rough? What did she say?
>obvious question is obvious
>>
>>16942335

most people dont ACTUALLY want to be abused, they just want the pleasure with the porno experience.

so you dont actually abuse her, just treat her like you're being rough. grab her by the hair but dont pull it. instead of 'smacking' her, just pat her really hard on the face. hook your fingers in her mouth like shes a little sex toy you're trying to open up.

also, sit down and talk out what she likes and doesnt like.

im lucky enough to be gay. fags love getting abused. ive choked a guy to tears and nearly vomitting and he leaves saying that its 'awesome'. they're always surprised by how brutal i can be.
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>>16942347
Typical female things,vague answers. Like just choke but not really. And grab my hips more. But doesn't really know what else

I thinks she's one of those submissive type, that want to be dominated. Typical 50 shades of grey mode. Except with out all the toys

Maybe I got the wrong Idea of rough. I'm going caveman lust on her when she wants a Christian Grey rough? Idk I'm confused

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Musicfags, how do you adjust to notes if you have absolute pitch? I'm struggling with all the modifiers like sharps and flats next to key and still find it much easier just to learn by ear.
5 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16942295
>has 'absolute' pitch
>cant understand how sharps flats or scales work
buddy youre just bad
>>
I'm envious. I know a few people with what we used to call "perfect" pitch. Go ahead and learn by ear. You can learn the other stuff later or get a teacher to help you.

I had to do the opposite. I was classically trained in piano but I've re-taught myself to arrange by ear. I find it far more enjoyable and I'm a much better player than I was.

In other words it's all good.
>>
>>16942295
The same way everyone else does: learn the system, it's not that hard.
Your pic is either Eflat major or C minor, btw

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