Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5655. page

Silly question honestly. It's entirely dependent on the person. The best answer for you is to stop thinking about it and just do it. Set up something reasonable. I'd say you need an hour minimum a day, and deviate once you know how much you need. Don't start off trying to jog a year of material into 2 days.

You're not going to benefit from it. You're going to quickly forget everything you memorized. You're going to not retain nearly as much. Take it slower if you have to.

Especially with something like math, take it in steps and give yourself practice problems to do daily. Rather than setting time per day, try to set LEARNING GOALS. If you hit that learning goal early, do practice problems til you have mastery.

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>>16996962

depends what you are doing. stephen king insists you have to write or read for 4 hours a day to be any good at it.

as far as math goes, take the classes, and learn. then go an extra half hour to reaffirm everything in your mind. but if therei s a course you dont need to do anything more than get an A to get good at it.

I dont remember. Or the next time, or the time after that. I'm terrified of physical touch so I ended up being totally blackout drunk the entire time.
Yes
Yes

You can still have a husband.

>>16996719
Why are you terrified?
Are you embarrassed?

If you were giving head and the guy told you "tell me it's big" would you be turned off at the insecurity or think nothing of it

>>16996553
The first one.

Well, after laying off dating for over half a year, I started dating again. It wasn't going to work out - and I think we both sensed it. She was moving to another state for grad school, and I'm going to be moving to SF for work.

My priorities are to find a job first and foremost. Girls, should I have fought harder for this? I mean, we both liked each other, but the stresses from being preoccupied with work and grad school would have been too much.

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>>16996471
bump.. with /adv/ approved tits

>>16996471

>So why do I hear these things?
Probably just dreams. Just most people don't remember them so they won't have to ask /adv/ about them :-D

>lucid dream
It is when you realize you are dreaming and then you can direct your dreams to your liking. Pretty hard to achieve.

>making these things happen again
Google sleep stages and then you can try lucid dreaming.

But most of it is just not so scientifically explored area full of myths and hogwash. Hell we still don't know why do we sleep and for what exactly is it good for.

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>>16996514
There is a TED talks about sleeping and why it is important, here it is, just the bits about why it's important that we sleep. Something to do with having to restore energy and brain function after hours of working. I believe the 'fun' starts at 5:00
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWULB9Aoopc

If lucid dreaming is hogwash, then only those who have experienced it claim that it exists. Like those weirdos who claim they can think themselves into orgasm.
And if dreams are so vivid, and the sounds we hear are just in our minds then why do I wake to them as if they were a childhood nightmare? I mean. I'm an adult now, these dreams have no images relative to those I had as a child. In fact I dream of images less often. Just sounds.

>Liking estrogen fueled numales

>>16996632
Why is that a problem? At a certain point it's just drugs that increase the size of overly muscular humans.

>>16995705
Several reasons for not allowing photos. The most likely are

1. Flash photos can damage fragile paintings, fabrics or wall hangings

2. The site has an exclusive official photographer.

3. They want you to buy postcards in the gift shop

4. And just what is gained by a photo of your wife in a particular spot - proof to you that you actually were there and it wasn't a hallucination?

>>16995705
more of your wife dude

That's actually a pet peeve of mine. I cannot stand that contradiction. You can take a picture of the Mona Lisa but not this castle. I usually try to sneek pictures anyway.

Im sorry OP,

I dont really have questions, I feel upset now I've been reading this..

Cancer is a motherfucker. Why haven't we cured that shit yet?

>>16995584
I am very sorry to hear that this has happened to you. If you don't mind me asking, how are you coping with the idea that you are going to die pretty soon? I have run into a crisis in my life where i'm confronting that i'll have to die someday and its haunting me and taking over my life. I'm scared of dying.

If it makes you feel better I have had some experiences happen in my life that i'm pretty sure were super natural. So maybe there is another side.

If you're able to then you should talk to your sister about this. She should know that violence like that is extremely bad in any relationship. If you can convince her this is wrong it will make all the difference in her future relationships and her life.

I have doubts she will listen to you though and if she doesn't then you go talk to the boyfriend. Because if she listens to you and STILL wants to hit him and finds this behavior ok then that will give you more incentive to talk to the BF and save him.

Some people will disagree with me and say let these people live their own lives and learn from their mistakes. I think stepping into other peoples lives can actually make a big difference and make this world a better place. So sorry.

I'm thinking talk to him. Say she hits him regularly and logically he's going to hit her back at some point, then it's over for him probably. What kind of way is that to live, flinching and shit.

i'm the most lost i've been in a while

my ex and my best friend secretly fucked multiple times behind my back. i'v been together with her for a year.

her reasoning is i had been cold to her because apparently i was treating her like shit and being cold not responsive to her. she thought i was about to break up with her
i wasn't. i was just depressed

they saw 4 times in 3 week period. i've read their chat logs. they conversed that they what they were doing was horrible and expressed regret and hatred towards themselves

she is currently breaking down, freaking out, saying she doesn't deserve me and is begging me for forgiveness . she is threating to end herself and is cutting herself and shit

i've already beat the living shit out of this friend.
he's also cried to me out of guilt and forgiveness and claims he did it out of vulnerability because of how horrible he felt that his recent gf broke up with him.

she tells me she was vulnerable, blackout drunk, and weak everytime. he would enable her, manipulate he with affection and get her drunk.

i've never had this happen. i'm confused.

i still love her as an individual. she's the closest person i have. and i'm the closest person she has. these are facts

i hate the fact that she is still my 'distant partner' for the time being as i'm figuring out what to do

i don't know what to do
i'm so confused
can this be salvaged???

Why do you take research chemicals?
Was this always like this?
What pharmacological effect does those chemicals have on normal people?
Post pic of vag for scientific purposes.

Maybe you're aroused by science. Try masturbating in a lab coat, see if that helps.

one of two reasons

1. Your body has become dependent on the chemicals to help you feel pleasurable sexual stimulation
or
2. Your body is getting a chemical (or producing a chemical reaction) that it normally couldn't produce on it's own due to your own hormone imbalances or what have you.

To get more specific, you may want to break it down into different factors.

Is it a matter of physical, mental, or emotional pleasure?

Do you not feel pleasure from penetration or touch?
Do you not feel pleasure from the idea of having sex or the scenarios you've been involved in?
Do you not feel comfortable with the partner you're with?

Determine what reactions the chemical that you're using causes and try to learn about how that affects the human mind. I'm not a scientist.

From my experience it started from casual talking and having one thing in common. I talked to her like a normal human being and we just hit it off.

The start of a relationship is as overrated as virginity

>>16994574
So you just started having interesting conversations and then sex happened? There must be a few few steps in between.

I stopped playing video games. Like, I just didn't do it anymore.

Now I play games on my ipad sometimes, and that's fine.

I used to be addicted to MMORPGs and other games but now all I do is work, study and sometimes watch tv with my wife or get dragged out on trips

I was happier before

>>16990464

there comes a time when men need to stop consuming and start creating.

i played video games and watched TV up until about 8th grade. then i started writing my own TV shows nd designing my own games and such.

you dont have to be successful or do it as anything more than a hobby, but man feels unfulfilled when hes not creating. its hwy society exists.

only done it a few time but it's mainly cause the girl shows her true colors.

Last girl I was talking to had a huge princess complex. We're almost 30 and she's still pulling that shit.

instantly stopped caring. She now does everything in her power to fish for validation and to see if I'm paying attention to her

Because I'm fat, ugly and she deserved better.

>>16988524
because after the first date I realized she was not what I pictured.
they're always better from a distance

Don't do it

>>16997563
But what if I REALLY want to?

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>>16997595
Hmm that's a tough one....don't?
Why waste 9 months if sobriety and climbing the ladder to just hope off it. Seems like an arrogant choice to me.

>>16997495

they aren't inappropriate. whats happening is a combination of three things
1) you are afraid to hit on a woman, afraid of rejection
2) she is obviously there for a reason, and the fear of (1) is doubled when you think of getting in the way of that
3) some girls rant about being hit on in certain places saying its inappropriate, and you took that to heart.

so lets deconstruct this

>you are afraid to hit on a woman, afraid of rejection

dont be. assuming you have no social ties to this woman, the worst that happens is she turns you down, five minutes later she forgets you exist. nothing bad happens at all. you are fine. so why be afraid? there is on man in a cloak in space with a magic chalk board keeping track of this. you are not a bad person in any sense of the word by getting 'rejected'. its not even a rejection. its just a woman not haivng immediate chemistry with you. that is not the measure of a mans worth. even chads get rejected


>she is there for a reason, and you are afraid of getting in the way of that

and thats polite. but you are being whats called 'pre-polite'. if you see a woman and want to talk to her, simply talk to her. if shes not interested, she will make it pretty obvious. THAT is when you go back to your business. you are not a bad person for taking 20 seconds of her time. she is not that important. no one is.

>women rant about not liking getting hit on.

if you took every single girl ages 18-25 and surveyed them on where they DONT want to be hit on, then made what they said law, men would never ever be allowed to date women. half of women say NOT to hit on them at school for instance, cuz they go there to learn, not to flirt. yet a large number of relationsihps start at school. same goes for the workplace. some girls dont want to be hit on at work. some do.

for hte most part, it just boils down to 1) are you attractive and 2) do you have chenmistry. and you will never know til after the fact.

>>16997560
Thanks. That was the kind of answer I was looking for. To be honest, I've never actually approached a girl/asked a girl out due to these "blocks" that society puts on men.

One thing to note though, the instance where I saw the girl at work, I was the employee and she was a customer. I've thought about asking my boss if this is ok or not before, but I was kind of unsure about it. A lot of cute girls come in and out of my work, and I still get that regret of not speaking to them, even though I know it's probably not ok.

>>16997634

>society puts on men

society doesn't. you put it on yourself here mate. yes women complain and rant, but that doesnt mean they put a block. you arent goign to suddenly be the only man flirting with women. you will be one of the many. these men didnt say 'fuck you society'. they realized there was no society blocking them.

as far as work goes, its generally against company policy to ask out, but not to accept if you have been asked out. where do you work? what do you do there?

as for you approaching the women, assuming you have a reason to talk to them any flirting can be chalked up to business. be a bit ambiguous about it, dont go 'hey you're real cute' or anything like that. but if you talk to them and there is a conneciton, use that connection.

for instance
>work at wal mart
>talking to girl at check out about the movie she is buying
>oh, this is a great horror film, i love horror
>oh em gee, me too
>have you seen the trailer for the new paranormal activity? its supposed to be even shittier than the first 5 combined!
>oh em gee, of course! I am a girl so i find paranormal activity to be ground breaking truly horrifying films
>thats horrible, but hey, I'm going to check it out this weekend if you wanna go.

at the very least you can say
>we should get together and talk about it some more.

and if they seem interested trade numbers. it helps to have a business card you can hand them to avoid awkwardness.

but generally if its at work there should be a genuine obvious interests. dont take risks there.

The grass isn't greener if that's what you're thinking

>>16997436
This. OP, you're literally asking for a relationship with an incompatible bitch who will argue with you all the time. What even.

>>16997436
This, me and I'm sure many guys wish We had it as easy as you OP