Ok so last night I asked out a girl to come to the aquarium with me on Sunday, it will be our first time going out. Anyway, what do you guys suggest I do for the date to make it the best possible?
I plan on suggesting to change the time to the morning so we can eat at one of the restaurants in the aquarium for lunch instead of getting kicked out at 5 pm (when they close). How do I do that? I plan on saying "Hey, are you ok with me coming in the morning instead, like 9 AM?". (btw fish land opens at 9 so that will be best time to get there.)
Also, how do I make it clear that this is a date and not a couple friends hanging out? I don't know how to initiate hand holding, I'm afraid I'll make her cringe or something, plus I've never been in a relationship or even held hands with a girl before. I'm not sure if I should feel out the situation during the date or if I should be very explicit about it. I did offer to pay for her ticket there, but I'm not sure if that is enough.
All right I chose to be explicit, lets see how this goes. Still waiting for the reply.
>>17087818
Quit waiting around for her reply. Go do something productive. God you aren't even in a relationship yet and you seem needy as fuck.
Well you made it clear its a date. Now focus on reading her reactions during said date. Then you can progress from there. Also no thinking, this will come naturally to you. The more you think percentage of failure will increase.
Also good job taking my advice yesterday and growing a pair of balls.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xppg2plHqB4
>>17087818
Don't text too much. Talk and ask her things in person.
>I don't know how to initiate hand holding
Just brush your hand against hers, see what happens.
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><Random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. This is something that cannot be explained. You either have learned to intuit this or you have not. If you have not, the only way to learn is experience--there are no shortcuts. So it comes back to: Just ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>Brandon, that one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
>fart guy
lost
glad he's included now
Girls (Or guys for that matter)
Would you ever trust your gut if it is telling you that you will end up with someone who rejected you not even two weeks earlier?
(Note: In my case, my gut is saying that it will all workout with her in the end, though she rejected me already. I know it won't work out, but my gut is saying otherwise. It is just saying to be friendly with her, and everything will fall into place down the line.)
Ladies, say you left your partner of six years to live in another country.
Say you told him that you are still in love with him, and want him etc, but don't want to come back to the country he lives in because no bad association with original country.
Say you want to be single for a while because you were in and out of relationships most of your life and you want to know if you love him for him or for everything he has done for you.
Say you told him that he should try and date other people to see the same.
What would you expect the guy to do? Accept shit and just move on? Or would you want some show of resolution and move to the country as well after a year or two?
As a side question, how much of those reasons stated above are typically bullshit (from a woman's point of view)?
It's obvious that the online dating pool is catered to Caucasian males. I recently performed the following experiment.
With my real profile, I would send out very detailed replies, sometimes even referencing the specifics of a female's profile, so that she knows I've read everything. Additionally, my profile is equally detailed. After literally hundreds of messages sent, I get no replies; just 1 or 2 fatties and maybe a 1 or 2 on the 10 scale.
On the other hand, I recently created a profile of a good looking Caucasian male with limited profile information. Nothing too detailed. I don't even send detailed responses with it. Just a "Hey" and maybe a smiley face.
What's sad is that even those females who specifically state they won't reply to men who say one or two words, or even one spoken word of ebonics.... they still message me back.... with extreme enthusiasm on top of it. In fact, 85% of the females I send messages to reply and they're excited about potentially meeting up.
If this isn't proof of sexual racism, I don't know what is. Online dating for me personally if extremely difficult... but I guess not for white guys. baka. I could probably make a good blog out of this one.
It's like, some of these profiles are low key designed to weed out black people who are thought to be uneducated... but even when a really educated one like me responds, they pretend like they never even seen my message.
"these girls are not into me, RACIST!!!!!!"
>>17083312
You should probably do some real research. The results are out there. If you look on okcupid, overwhelmingly so, the minorities are typically the only ones who mark off that ethnicity doesn't matter.
I don't know what to tell you other than the fact that you're delusional about the website itself being racist or out to get you. The girls you're talking to just aren't into you or prefer white guys. I'm sure you're a great person at the end of the day people have preferences about what they want in a partner, and race is one of those for a lot of folks.
Either keep putting yourself out there, or go to a dating website specifically made for people of your ethnicity, you'll likely have more success.
48 year old man
Married 24 years
six kids, 2 grown and out of the house
won and lost, succeeded and failed enough to know a few things
Ask away
[had an end-of-month meeting cancel]
>>17085865
do you get happier as you get older?
If you have an adult daughter can you set me up with her?
>>17085865
I'm trying to move into networking-based marketing (I sell life insurance) to generate leads. Any tips on that?
I have cheated on my current GF with my ex.
It has been two days, and all I feel is constant regret.
I love my current gf, she is so sweet and cute, and the only reason I did that was that I got drunk as hell to the point I had no control over what I am doing.
Will that feel ever go away, or did I fucked up this relationship for good?
>>17085590
obviously I have not told my gf, and I am not even planning to do so.
>>17085590
It will go away. Just don't ever tell her, and channel those terrible feels into being the best boyfriend you can and never let that happen again
>>17085590
First, screw you...
Second, It'll probably go with time if you stop contact with your ex and become a better boyfriend, and obviously don't tell her what you did otherwise that'll end the relationship.
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><Random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. This is something that cannot be explained. You either have learned to intuit this or you have not. If you have not, the only way to learn is experience--there are no shortcuts. So it comes back to: Just ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>Brandon, that one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
Girls, would you just cuddle a guy?
Or is that reserved for fwb or bf only?
No I'm not Brandon.
>>17083462
I used to cuddle with one of my male friends. We were super close but never been interested romantically.
It's not something I'd do with a random dude tho.
how do you go about having sex with someone who has been abused? could use advice from either gender.
They were fairly young when it first happened but i think it happened more than once, im iffy on the specifics but i believe them cause they freaked out once when it seemed like we were going to make out.
I just want to make her comfortable.
Question about HAIR:
are you born with "pretty" hair or is it a matter of taking good care of it?
Can you recover from the damage of bleaching and/or dyeing your hair?
pic related: slavic hair, my absolute favorite.
I know there are obvious structural differences between, say, curly and straight hair, black and blonde hair and so on, but within each category, is there room for improvement?
>>17082013
>Can you recover from the damage of bleaching and/or dyeing your hair?
reminds me of pic.
Also if you are too worried about damage of bleaching/ dyeing perhaps just shave your head, the new hair will be healthy.
>>17082013
"Pretty" is subjective. What type of hair do you have, and what's wrong with it?
So last night my girlfriend was laying on the couch in some nice lacey lingerie. I come home from the gym thinking she wants to fuck, so I come onto her and she keeps pushing me off, telling me she doesn't want to have sex. I keep kissing her and she is laughing and playfully rejecting me and then she says "seriously I don't want to have sex".
So I leave her alone, and I call her out saying she just used me for attention. She of course denies it.
Then just now we go upstairs to clean up before dinner. She lays on the bed doggie style and playfully wiggles her ass. I come onto her again and she rejects me same as last night.
This fucking happens all the time. And she is such a jealous little bitch. If I mention or look at another girl she gets irritated, not like she makes a big deal out of it, but she doesn't like it.
We rarely have sex anymore. And I get rejected like 10-20 times before we actually do have sex. The only surefire way to get her to want sex is when she is drinking, and honestly she annoys me when she is drunk, and it's kind of off-putting that she only wants sex when she is drunk.
Other times we have sex is when I'm distant because she has made me upset. This doesn't always happen, but if I'm distant a whole day by that evening we usually have sex. And sometimes when I get rejected by her I get upset, and then she blames me for making her feel guilty.
Honestly this shit pisses me off so bad I just wanna say fuck it and cheat on her. She seems to have virtually no sex drive anymore, even though it was like a fucking porno when we first started dating.
She's using and abusing you. Dump her.
>>17080743
I dont think it is quite that dramatic.
Every other aspect of the relationship is quite good. Just getting sick of her having low libido.
>>17080749
DUMP HER OP SHE'S CHEATING
How do you get over realizing that women are with you because of what you can do not who you are? Basically that women objectify men?
Every girl, my current included, has said she loves me for me but this is obviously false. When I get a promotion, suddenly the complaints about how broke she is start. When she gets a promotion, the whining about how she's doing all the work starts. With every girl it's always a power struggle about what SHE is getting.
it's always about her. It's always about them. What's the point to being a good partner when i can treat them like I don't need them and get better results? In the case of my current girl - when I act like a truly equal partner - disaster. When I act like an alpha male... well I'm sitting here smoking her weed, eating her food, fucked her as much as I want this past weekend. How? I dumped her. What the fuck is wrong with women?
>>17082308
>because one woman's traits= all women's traits
Phew lad, lay off the woman-hating redpill for a while.
>>17082321
I'm not able to give an exhaustive list of my personal experience here. It's extensive. And almost all of my experience points the same way.
I've dated many types of women. when I've let go of judgement and encouraged the truth, it's always the same story.
Women love men for what those men will do for those women or what those women expect those men to do. I intentionally disrespect women to their faces now and they fuck and date me more, not less, because they see me getting promotions and winning at life. They "love" me because of what I do, not who I am. I could be the most callous piece of shit and after whining for a day or two theiyre right back to me. But the more I commit, the less they give.
It's kind of sickening.
I think you ought to re-assess your interpretation of how your problems in your relationship come up. Is it really just about them, what they want and what you SHOULD be doing? Or is it the way you're seeing the issue by not looking at the whole context?
Maybe you just date shitty women. Maybe you're shitty and attract shitty people. You need to provide a little more detail before you start making a big oversimplification.
I enjoy leading on fat chicks and then ghosting them. It's shitty but it's fun.
man you are terrible at painting.
I would literally have to be hitler with my finger on the button of the gas chamber and be shooting a gay person with the other to be as bad as you try painting me.
everything that happened, happened for good reasons. the fact that you're in an echo chamber and are completely content with not even entertaining any other way of seeing things because it would mean admitting that you were wrong, is not my fault.
Have contact with multiple girls yet i keep thinking about that one person who wont even reply to my messages, i want her more then anything but what's the point if she cannot even show basic respect towards me?
I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself.
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><Random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. This is something that cannot be explained. You either have learned to intuit this or you have not. If you have not, the only way to learn is experience--there are no shortcuts. So it comes back to: Just ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>Brandon, that one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
Girls,
I'm sick and tired of manly smells and would like to start using more feminine shower gels like orange flower, vanilla and maybe even lavender.
I am 6'4, skinny, normal looking guy but usually slow and a bit clumsy. Would you think I'll of someone smelling like this?
>>17079982
Why not buy unscented ones? I don't think those smells will appeal to most women in terms of what they'd like to smell in a guy.
>>17079982
I'd think you're a lesbian.
Seriously though, don't do that - at best girls will think you're taken
My partner has BPD.
I know he loves me but i feel like he hates me a lot of the time because his emotions rule him and he gets scared and insecure because he's afraid of me leaving him.
What can I do for him to make him feel comfortable? I feel like I already do everything to help him but it is not enough. I also don't feel nurtured by him but I love him so much I don't want to leave.
>>17077270
Leave him, there is 0.000000000000% chance he will ever change.
>>17077282
Why do you say that? do you have a similar experience?
>>17077292
>Why do you say that? do you have a similar experience?
Yes. You think when he feels emotional, you "did" something, and can "fix" it; because this is what would happen if YOU were to have those same emotions.
He's not like you. You can't change him. You'll never make him happy.
He needs medication, just being nice will be 0% effective.
Sorry.
I've tried tinder, okcupid, plentyoffish, meetme, bumble, happn, badoo, clover, pretty much every dating app you can think of
And I've had no luck meeting a nice girl, I don't think I'm even that ugly so honestly IDK what the hell is going on (I can maybe post a pic)
Does anybody have ANY advice for me? I'd appreciate it for sure
Does anyone know any other good dating sites/apps?
>>17080853
This is one of those things where you're going to need to provide a buttfuck load of more detail if anyone's going to have a chance of identifying what you're doing wrong.
>>17080921
I wasn't sure what kind of details would help.. ask and I'll give details
Why do women have such an easier time getting relationships than men?
I'm not kidding. Pretty much every girl I know is in a LTR and has a huge social circle. This is such a common thing that millions of guys believe this. What I'm saying is, it seems to happen often enough that guys irl and the Internet think single women don't exist.
What is with the massive disparity? Why do girls have it so much easier? And don't even start with the "only neckbeards are lonely" line, any honest person will admit they know average guys who are lonely.
The truth is that I don't think I've even known any single women for years. Haven't met a single one, except maybe the girl who was so ugly that she could pass as a tranny (assuming she was even a woman).
-high-quality men are in relationships with multiple women
-women with visibility are approached by men very regularly, whether they are in a relationship or not
The "girls you know" simply are in demand because they are visible. There's a ton of single women out there, especially the ones stuck in jobs that hire mostly women/is female oriented.
All the girls at work I know are in relationships, but considering 80% of the place is male im not exactly surprised.
If you become a hairdresser im sure you'll meet plenty of single women
>>17080092
Because all a woman has to do is not act slutty (they can be a slut but just not act like one) and not be fat (even then) and some guy will date her
Women also aren't the instigators of relationships so even if they're socially inept wierdos they can get dates
Long question, if you're not interested that is okay. I am trying to be a less judgmental individual. I have a girlfriend of about a year whom I care for very deeply, the only issue is we don't see eye to eye on a few (I think important) things.
First off we like similar music except for she "loves" country but only listens to it when I'm not around. My thinking on the matter has always been either stupid people like country or country makes people stupid, it's more vapid than 80's pop.
Second she is a deist and can't explain it, I wouldn't mind if she could... but fuck... "I don't know, faith can't be explained" is just some bs. She isn't a christian even (though she did use the what if a day isn't 24 hrs bs argument in support of Genesis.) She's a molecular biologist; I don't get how she can be so logical in the rest of her life but just not apply it here.
She is perfect otherwise, gorgeous, has opinions, is somewhat experimental sexually without being a slut, probably the funniest girl I've ever met, very similar interests...
How do I keep from being such a pretentious ass? Ask me anything if need be. Dumping QTs for a few hours.