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How do I start improving myself? I want to be stronger and smarter, but I always just end up drinking beers, smoking pot, and browsing 4chan. I've been through a few major depressive episodes and feel pretty good about life now, but feeling better and being better are two different things.
How do I start on the path of self improvement (and stick to it)?
Personal experience, recommended reading, or anything else on the subject are all greatly welcomed.
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>>17327428
Start lifting. Seriously. Or any exercise for that matter, as it will dump good feeling hormones in your brain. Eat better, lift more and read good books that interest you. Find a hobby you enjoy and do it, with or without others approval or company. Be your own person, grow as an individual.
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>>17327477
Nice dubs anon, and thanks for the response.
I want to do all of that, but I'm having a hard time breaking the behavioral patterns I've set up for myself. Overcoming the initial anxiety of "going out and doing" has always been an issue for me, even though I'm fine once I'm there.
You got a favorite book?
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>>17327510
I just read "ready player one" and was enthralled by it. Fantastic read to get away from life for a while.
I know full well the struggle of not being able to get out. I have anxiety that gets worse and better sporadically, but you have to just realize that no one at a gym is going to judge you for trying to improve yourself. If they do, they're a waste of oxygen. Just get out, meet some gymbros and lift to good music
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For some reason I keep finding myself living with bad roommates. Each one is always for a different reason.
Four most recent
>first dude
>met at a work gig
>tried to sleep with my ex
>she rejects him
>he blamed me
>was forever bitchy with me afterwards
>rich and entitled
>rarely worked, lived off parents money
>was constantly screaming at me, other roommate, and his three cats
Next roommate
>girl I had been best friends with for years.
>boyfriend hates that she lives with a guy
>this creates tension
>she starts going crazy dramatic over every little thing
>constantly scheming to find ways to get me to move out
>always bitching me out for little things
Next roommate was a good guy friend of mine
>extremely dirty
>always eating all my food
>always smelling disgusting
Current roommate
>chatty and opinionated as fuck
>shoots down any opinion or thought I have, regardless of the topic
>always criticizing the way I clean and do chores
>I almost always feel tension from her
So, four roommates that all suck for very different reasons. What's going on here? Is it possible that I'm the problem? I've tried to be friends with all of them, but I always end up in a situation where we hate each other. I don't know what I could've done to all four of these people to create these unideal environments.
What am I missing, /adv/?
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>>17327415
>living with friends, acquaintances, and/or colleagues
it's like you don't know what you're doing.
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I wouldn't say you're necessarily the problem. It sounds like each person had legit bullshit a roommate would have to deal with. Every person does. You don't know someone until you live with them. You just need to find a way to let the bullshit roll off your back. Don't let yourself feel too aggravated. If they want to be hostile, let them. If you keep trying to be considerate and friendly, eventually people will see the other person as the asshole.
tl;dr turn the other cheek. All roommates suck. Just try to be the roommate who doesn't suck.
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>>17327420
I forgot to mention that the fourth was a stranger I met through an apartment finder website.
But if friends, acquaintances, colleagues, and strangers are all bad choices than who the fuck am I supposed to live with? I can't afford to live alone.
Anonymous (ID: !0NoFpzDMyo)
No passion 2016-07-05 21:46:58 Post No.17327393
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No passion 2016-07-05 21:46:58 Post No.17327393
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No passion
Anonymous (ID: !0NoFpzDMyo)
2016-07-05 21:46:58
Post No. 17327393
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I have no passion, no drive, no skills or trades. No real future goals to aspire to. I know there is more to life besides work and sleep, and even then, my job isn't spectacular: it's just retail. There's more to life than Walmart. At the same time I am a strong, capable worker, willing to learn, eager to work, and with reliable transportation.
Why can't I move up and beyond in life?
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>>17327393
the autism probably doesn't help.
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>>17327393
Try getting a different job. Wal-Mart will suck your soul dry.
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>>17327393
>no drive
Are you not a real human being? Maybe take up an instrument. It doesn't force you to be creative, just dedicated to daily practice.
Hey /adv/ need some help. I had sex with my girlfriend awhile back and at the time we didn't use any protection. She forgot to take her birth control two days in a row and didn't tell me. I didn't finish in her but I think I pre-cummed in her. I was wondering if anyone on here knows or can guess what my odds are that I accidentally made her pregnant. She takes oral birth control and has been on it for at least a couple months.
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>>17327379
>missed pills
>fuck raw
>didn't come inside
i'm going to go with a 5% chance.
go get a test you idiot.
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>>17327379
What if I did cum in her, but it was a weak pump. Am I still good then?
Also I'm going to get a test within two days. I'm curious now though.
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>>17327471
meant for >>17327388
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I have anxiety and depression. I can't keep a job mainly due to that. I'm a single father and I have my son the majority of his waking hours. We live with grandma who is an aggressive emotional old woman who won't let me parent my child without getting in the way and shitting on me about anything I do. How do I get out?
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>>17327341
I really need help. I've been contemplating just offing myself.
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k
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>>17327341
how do anxiety and depression stop you from holding a job?
you have a person that is willing to house you and be there to look after your son when you're at work and yet you're here posting on /adv/.
secure a job and income. look for a partner to share life with.
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Recently my girlfriend broke up with me, but it was on good terms. She lives 180 miles away from me and we broke up because she didn't want to have a long distance relationship.
Do you think I should wait and maybe try again in the future or should I just give up? I'm shit with women and don't think I could get anyone else.
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>>17327340
hit the gym and halt communication. pursue other women.
waiting around for someone that has explicitly stated that they aren't interested in a relationship with you is about as cucked as you can get.
thank me later, friend.
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>>17327340
quicker you admit it is over the quicker you move on
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I'm in the same situation. I texted her for a short time after and went to therapy. It's totally aggravating when you tell people that your girlfriend is 2-3 hours away and the first bit of advice is a LDR when she doesn't want one.
Move on. It's going to feel very, very slow though.
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I'm 24 now and ever since I was around 16 I've had anxiety. All the general shit you'd associate with it like feeling dizzy in large crowds, being twitchy as fuck, lack of confidence, feel like you're boiling inside when trying to talk to people etc.
The worst however is any time I eat I get the sensation that I'm choking and can't breathe. This shit happens a lot especially when I try to eat meat or large meals. I went out with friends the other night for dinner and after eating only 2/3rds of the meal, which wasn't that large to begin with I felt like I couldn't breathe and was choking. The pressure then builds up and you panic and panic while trying to act like everything's normal and then make an excuse to run to the bathroom to freak out like you're dying in some stall, or you wake up in the middle of the night unable to catch a breath feeling like you're choking on phlegm.
It's honestly gotten to the point were I kinda just want to shoot myself. I literally cannot eat a fucking meal without this sensation of being unable to breathe, feeling like the food is caught in throat or chest or whatever. I've had camera tests, blood tests etc done and everything came back normal so multiple times the doc has just said it's in my head. I've tried anxiety medication and it just fucks with my head and makes me feel sick and shit.
Even when I'm sitting there telling myself it's all in my head and not real, it still fucking happens. I just had a cup of tea with a few biscuits, then spent the last half hour walking around my flat light headed to the point where I feel like fainting and any tiny amount of light feels like a flash of the sun and I get dizzy because I feel like I can't fucking breathe.
I wouldn't wish this shit on anyone but I fucking hope there's at least someone here that's had this who can offer any advice.
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>>17327306
You need therapy and medication OP. CBT and an SSRI works for this for most people. They might give you some more potent meds for panic attacks until your anxiety becomes manageable. I'm dealing with this same shit right now. It can get better I promise.
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You should probably look for professional help, OP.
While i struggle with anxiety myself those choking sensations sound fucking dangerous. Btw. with professional help i dont mean any more fucking doctors or any more meds, that shit obviously went nowhere.
I doubt anyone here can really help you out since we have no clue where your anxiety started and why it grew to such proportions
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>>17327306
What medications did they give you?
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So, this here box of 40 ore-ida bagel bites works out to about 2100 calories.
And for lunch, I had about 20 of these bagel bites.
Spend 7 hours on the computer.
Now lets say, for dinner, I had an additional 20 bagel bites.
That's 2100 calories right? So that's a healthy day of eating?
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2000 is the average for men, 1800 for women. You went 100 over. If you had any liquid calories besides these bites then you're over. A diet consisting of bagel bites only would raise your blood pressure through high sodium levels and getting no potassium would keep it high.
Does it matter for 1 day? Na you're fine. But multiple days of this kind of diet would show body weakness.
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>>17327316
>2000 is the average for men
>manlets
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>>17327316
>>17327303
why do autists think that the "based on a 2000 calorie diet" daily amount% is somehow a benchmark/suggestion that a 2000 calorie diet is normal?
and you're spreading the "high sodium intake increases blood pressure" meme too.
it's like you get all your nutritional information from your fucking mom.
Soon I'll tell some random girls to slap me hard.
How would you assess the chance that they will do it?
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>>17327295
just make some T-shirt captioned SLAP ME and grab some random girls ass
if you want it to be from someone you know just ask her politely, might be working a lot of easier if she's drunk
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If you're ugly and you make it sexual, she probably won't do it.
If you're attractive and it's for fun, she'll slap you immediately without hesitation
Any chance to get into Hollywood/L.A. Business?
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>>17327262
Easiest way is doing support stuff background stuff. Getting coffee's and stuff
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Ohh ook I get it
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I just jerked off 4 times before class.
How do I not be a piece of shit?
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>>17327234
Stop jerking off so much.
Go a few days without it. Occupy your time with something more productive like studying or learning how to play an instrument.
If you do it a lot it will fuck with your brain's internal reward system and leave you feeling shitty.
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>>17327252
Not OP, but how much is too much? Is 1-2 times daily going to fuck with my head?
Does nofap work?
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Bumping/hijacking thread.
Anonymous
In Love With A Guy Who's Engaged 2016-07-05 20:51:35 Post No.17327214
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In Love With A Guy Who's Engaged 2016-07-05 20:51:35 Post No.17327214
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In Love With A Guy Who's Engaged
Anonymous
2016-07-05 20:51:35
Post No. 17327214
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So I had a fwb I was seeing for a while who was in an open relationship; I'm gay he's bi. We agreed when his fiancee came back it'd end. I was in it for the sex, but he wanted to spend our time doing domestic things like doing laundry, grocery shopping, taking long walks, going out to restaurants. At one point he told me he loved me and I said it back. He pretty much ended up dating me which was not part of the open part of their relationship.
He said we could keep being friends even when she came back, but the first time we hung out alone he kissed me goodbye when i was leaving.
I moved in with him and his fiancee and we've been living together for a month. Their relationship is shit and everything I know about him tells me he won't break up with her.
I'm thinking about writing him a letter telling him I fell in love with him, and that his relationship with her is bad for him.
Should I do it? What should I say? How do I give it to him so no one else sees it?
I move out in a couple of days so if I need to I never have to see them again. I think he'd be happier with me but I also think he'd just be happier with not her.
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>>17327214
woof i remember reading about this before i think a month ago or something but its certainly changed a bit since then.
dont bother with the letter.
just tell him. tell him you want him to leave with you and start a new adventure together. you want to be his and you want him to be yours.
thats all you can do. if he agrees, yay. if not, you start a new adventure and get him out of your life.
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>>17327214
You saw their interactions when you where a third wheel. People act differently when they are alone as a couple.
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>>17327214
You won't win with pussy, anon. Sounds like he used you for sex and a tampon for emotional needs without taking the thing seriously, and you stupidly let him. In my opinion writing a letter will only scare/disgust/burden him down. If you two were already kinda dating and he still got together with his girl, it means that he rejected you.
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I live in the southeastern USA and I'm currently in school to become a paramedic.
Should I go for an EMS job or be an ER technician in a hospital? Can any EMTs tell me about their experiences in these fields and the pros/cons of both?
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>>17327205
Im not one but i hear EMT's make shit pay for a lot of work and stress.
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>>17327239
In my city they actually make pretty decent money. $20-$30/hr depending on who you work for.
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Are you in school to be a paramedic or are you just getting your EMT-B? There's a big difference
anyone done a vasectomy? I'm thinking about it but i'm curious how it affects you.. i read you can get chronic pain and lose your sex drive.
scared about the "surgery" too, i don't like the idea of being cut open while you're awake.
so if anyone has done it, please share your stories.
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My dad got a vasectomy. It was a rather quick procedure and it's effective. He was a bit sore for a couple of days, but after some bedrest and proper care he hasn't had a problem with it.
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Research says that vasectomy increases the likely hood of prostrate cancer in men
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I just took a drug test for a job, but used my friends piss because I smoke a lot of weed. It showed up positive for amphetamines, and being a retard, when she asked if I took adhd medication I told her "yes" and now I have to come up with a prescription or I won't pass. Am I fucked? What happens if I don't give them a prescription? Could the law get involved?
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>Could the law get involved?
No. But you're not gonna get the job.
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lmao just ghost them, man
you already fucked up twice
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>i am retard: the thread