I actually used to be fat. When I was 12 years old, I must have been something like 5'4" and weighed approximately 170lbs, almost entirely fat. When I hit about 13-14, suddenly all the fat dropped off at an incredibly rapid rate. Now I am 5'9", and weight 158lbs on a good day.
It's really hard for me to gain weight. I drink a bag of homogenized milk everyday (approximately a L), every single day I eat 5 pieces of bacon, 2 eggs scrambled, a tomatoe and two hash browns. I'm always drinking milk at work, I eat multiple calorie bars a day. Sometimes I'll just order a double big mac combo in the middle of the day if I need food fast. I would say I eat about 4 solid meals a day, something upwards of 2500 calories daily. I would say it's really rare I eat less than this amount, usually I eat more. It's normal for me to constantly be eating as often as I can.
Despite this, I never seem to gain weight. Believe me, my current weight is due to a concerted effort to gain by eating more and lifting. At one point 2 years ago or so, I was about 128lbs. I felt disgusted by myself. I know my own mother thinks I'm unattractive. Even past girlfriends have commented on how skinny I am. When I eat people comment sometimes on how bizarre it is that I'm eating a meal twice the size of everyone else and I'm the skinniest person there.
I hate it. I'm always hungry. I'm always eating. I don't even like eating anymore, it's a chore. Food doesn't taste good to me, I literally eat food based on shoving as much fat, protein and carbs into myself as I comfortably can while doing everything else I need to do.
I don't like being like this, no one likes a skinny man.
Also I don't need or want sympathy from females telling me they'd date me regardless. Even if it's true, I don't care. I'm not happy with my body. I want it to change, I've been trying to change it and I don't know how.
Are there pills or supplements or something you can take to increase your weight or slow metabolism?
>>17363002
You're probably not even done growing yet and are still at the stage where your body hasn't caught up. Give it a few years of normal eating and exercise relative to your current weight and height and once you start really working for a living you'll put on the mass you're after.
Both myself and my father were skeletons up until our early 20s, when we stopped growing. He was much taller than me, but it was the same process.
You probably hate yourself for how skinny you are, whatever, get over it. You're either going to end up packing on unnecessary weight you'll have to burn off later when you want to get swole, or you'll gain a tiny amount of muscle which you'll lose because of the forced effort involved in keeping it. Relax and give it time.
Provided you're still attractive face-wise and lean rather than just gawky, you can probably pull of skinniness.
I was 5'9 and barely 65kgs at 17, now I'm a much healthier weight after lifting heavy shit for a living for three years
See pic related, all Euro models who're like 5'11 and featherweight but pull it off
>>17363045
I'm 25 years old.
I'm not a teenager.
I was 128lbs at 23. This is not normal. Many, many people comment that I always look too skinny. I hate it.
I don't want to be a European model. I'm not a 17 year old boy. I'm a 25 year old man with a hard working job. I should look like a 25 year old man with a hardworking job. Women don't look at me like a man, they see a boy and it's actually hurt my dating life a lot. Many women say I look handsome at first and then think "wow you're so skinny..." and shortly after lose interest.
I need advice from men, not boys thank you.
>>17363060
I'm in the same boat as you. Sure enough, some people will often comment 'you're skinny as hell, eat some more' even though I eat enough per week to bankrupt Somalia.
I don't let it bother me, though. I'm happy enough I can stuff my face and not grow into a fat bastard.
I fucked up so hard and I'm on a emotional edge right now.
I quit smoking two weeks ago after a year of casual smoking. I also started running those two weeks back, I felt my stamina increase over those two weeks and felt I was progressing well.
Today is Saturday and I just had a relapse and smoked a ciggarette. I'm angry/scared/upset and near a rage frenzy because I feel I have undone my hard work.
When I continue my fitness regime on Monday will the cigarette have noticeably set me back. Will I feel the ill effects?
I worked so fucking damn hard.. And I fucked it up.. Please, I don't know what's coming over me..
>>17362973
Its only one, doubt it will affect your workout, just dont relapse again, i stopped mid march and havent touched them since, it gets easier with time, also if you smoked casually it wont matter much in your stamina, i smoked like half a pack or more a day for the last 6 months of my 3 or 4 years of smoking and I already feel more or less recuperated staminawise so you should have no issue
>>17363054
This has calmed me down so much, thank you anon. I won't relapse again, I promise. Today has shown me how much I regret I felt for potentially undoing my hard work, I be beaten by petty addiction.
>>17363076
Np anon, just make sure you quit now, its much easier now than a few years from now when you are smoking a pack a day and panic when you're out and its late so theres no place open to buy it and you have to walk miles in the cold so you can get that last fix before you sleep
So I have had a gf for about three weeks now and we have hugged and kissed on the lips but haven't made out so how do you do this as I am not a seasoned alpha ?
Put tongue in mouth.
>>17362940
Make sure you open your mouth before.
>>17362930
If you're not confident about it, avoid making out all together. One of the most common reasons for an early breakup is bad kissing. Few things are more offputting for a girl than a bad or insecure kisser.
I just received this what am I supposed to do
Lube up
>>17362844
enema
More context needed.
Legit question - where do I find women? I think I tried about everything and all to no avail.
I heard they're outside sometimes
Just kidding, I'm also having this problem and at this point I'm so mentally fucked I can't initiate anything with strangers
>>17362833>>17362835
Dating sites? School, work, hobbies like sports, the gym, in the city....
Well they're everywhere?
>>17362840
Dating sites are too overwhelming for me. I mean, a lot of sites have bots for girls to start with, and the legit girls are being messaged by about 100 other guys and it just seems way too plastic to me.
I do plan to go to the gym when I have some more income, but right now that's not really a possibility. I work mostly with girls and I think it'd be a bad idea to try and establish something there 2bh. I have extreme social anxiety from lots of years of bad experiences, but I think I'm ok looking and I have a pretty good heart and decent personality when I can get comfortable around people. The problem is I get frustrated with myself and sometimes try to quicken the process with alcohol, so I used to be known as a bit of a drunk.
Where might a man find community of people who
>live together or very near
>Grow their own drugs
>Make grand bonfires in the woods, get naked and consume mushrooms
>Grow their own food and have some animals like cattle
And most importantly
>Would welcome major fuckups among their ranks
Where is that place in Europe anons, there must be some places like this dont tell me NOBODY lives like this anymore.
Some place i can go to tommorow or even today, knock on the gate or something, get taken in told to do something and in return be given place to sleep and drugs or food
>>17362821
You will find these communities in some bad 1960s fiction and noplace else.
>>17362821
Looking for a normal small community that you can just join with is unlikely enough. There's no way you'll find one that not only accepts drugs but also grows them. As far as running away and starting new, it's not 100% but you could visit rural farms (pretty much anywhere) and offer your services as a farmhand in exchange for food and a place to lay your head.
Small communities don't rely on drugs because they are not a bunch of depressed wimpy city boys to begin with.
Time for ultimate question /adv/? How to live?
Should you be asshole and care only about yourself while using others or is there a reason to be a "nice guy" or a "good guy" or even a "white knight" and stick to the rules while treating others the way you wish to be treated like.
So how is it /adv/?
An asshole wins duels. A nice guy wins wars.
>>17362807
If you exclusively pour out into others, always give, never take, then you'll find yourself very empty. Living selfish is shitty for everyone involved, too. Be a decent person, give some, take sparingly. Find a small/mid sized group of good friends and be very giving with them, build relationships with good people.
>>17362807
I think the best way us to hide your bad feelings. Tbh i absolutely hate everyone I know but I appreciate how useful it can be to have friends so i try and act nice when i can
Since I'm shy and not good at socializing,being funny etc I try to compensate by being nice and helping ppl but now it's gotten to the point where everyone just talks to me asking for favours, knowing I'm too dumb to say no. People who never talk to me will come asking me to do stuff for them and they're only "nice" to me when they need something. They even get my phone number from someone else and text me asking for favours. Idk how to say no without sounding rude or having them say im a bitch for not helping, but I'm sick of being used and not having any actual friends. How can I change this?
The cool thing is that you have no obligation to these people and most of them you'll never see again. Just cut off anyone that's using you, block them and never think about them again. It's rude, but at the same time they're not really your friends so why bother? For getting new friends you need to at least a little outgoing, join a club, sport, or group-based activity and just talk with those there. Build relationships where you can.
>>17362793
Practice saying this word in front of a mirror until you get it right:
No.
You're stronger than you think man. Yeah, cut all ties with people who use you. You need to just socialize more, maybe that can be people from your upcoming semester, workplace, wherever. Visit old friends maybe?
Also, just be honest with yourself. Do you really want to do favors for some cuck who doesn't care about you? Nothing wrong with saying no, you shouldnt care what they think.
Why do people keep telling me that "oh its ok other people have had depression or anxiety its k mate"
I dont want to be like those "other people", alright?
Not to sound too fucking rude, but I want to do something in my life, I'm not planning on dwelling throughout the ages
Fuck, this is why I don't feel normal, yes, sure, a specific amount of people might be having these moments too BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN ITS NORMAL
>>17362771
>Why do people keep telling me that "oh its ok other people have had depression or anxiety its k mate"
Probably because they want you to feel better? What is your question, exactly?
I think what OP means is that they want a solution that they can apply to the problem rather than being placated with statements they have probably heard over and over.
Living with mental illness can be extremely inhibiting to someone, especially depression.
Telling someone they aren't alone doesn't always resolve the issue, especially when it comes from someone who doesnt personally experience mental illness.
>>17362771
Yes, it is normal. Everybody (almost) have it to some degree. And it does not have to cripple you.
You develop strategies to cope with it and get to know yourself and what triggers you. I have dealt with panic attacks and some degree of generalized anxiety for many years (have also previously had depression). When I panic and feel my nervous system go bottom-up, I recognize instantly what is happening and what is triggering me. I know that it will pass and I know what to do to bring myself down. That helps me wind down faster, in a matter of minutes mostly now.
With generalized anxiety (fear of family or friends dying, me getting ill / losing my mind), it helps to develop a sense of humour to keep some ironic distance. Again, you get to know your own mind and eventually you can recognize the reoccuring irrational thoughts and brush them off with a laugh.
I am a Uni student and I am very succesful. So trust me, anxiety is not a death sentence. You just need the tools to deal with it, a healthy degree of self-irony and above all else, you need to be open towards what you are feeling.
Depression is a process and it needs to run its course - hopefully with the help of a skilled and humanitarian therapist.
Good riddance, bro. I know what it's like to feel all sorts of fucked up.
Hi, I'm just wondering if anyone else had a similar experience to me. I'm 27 and I've felt gay my whole life but I have always wondered if something happened to make me gay or if I was born gay.
When I was younger like 3-5 years old, I used to experiment with kids in my daycare in the bathroom (it was a christian daycare lol). There was like a group of 3 or 4 of us boys I can't remember. I remember that one of the kids showed us how to play with ourselves and then we all kind of went along with it.
Fast forward to me being like 5 or 7 and I'm showing my older cousin (he's like 8 or 9) how to kiss and suck dick. And go on to teaching neighborhood kids what I learned in kindergarten.
Again, fast forward to freshman year after the homecoming game and I'm 13 and my best friend is sleeping over. I tell him I'm gay and try to seduce him? Anyways give him a blowjob and he pretends to be asleep.
When I turned 20 I finally had sex for the first time with a drunk straight guy who literally raped me (I was definitely bleeding), but for some reason I loved it. Helped him get home after he freaked out for having sex with me and slept in his bed...the next morning was so awkward.
I feel like all the guys I go for definitely don't want a relationship. They just want me for sex and then get rid of me. I think that's why I like straight guys, because I feel like I don't deserve love. Has anyone been through any of this or can relate in any way? Haven't told anyone any of this...
kids experiment u fucking faggot
just dont do it so manyu times, ok thats weird
>>17362773
ok :(
>>17362766
The scientific data is still unsure whether there is a gay gene or it has something to do with early experience. But one thing is clear - if a homosexual person is "damaged" psychologically it is always because of shame, fear or mistreatment for being gay. That is, they are NOT gay because they are damaged, they may be damaged by social forces after being gay.
What are the risks of telling my therapist I'm suicidal? I mean on one hand I want to stop seeing him. He says I'm not ready but I guess I can still just stop going. He doesn't know I'm still suicidal (ever since over 1 year ago we never talked about this again). But on the other hand, this is exactly what I'm paying him for, right?
Maybe he's just not that good as a therapist. And I'm afraid that if I tell him I'm gonna be stuck with him for longer or that he's gonna take some sort of action, I've no idea what therapists do when someone claims to be suicidal. I'm often afraid I might actually kill myself but I guess it's not a real possibility if I haven't killed myself so far, right?
Suicidal thoughts come in varying degrees. Honestly it depends how vivid and how likely you are to act on them that determines how they react. Being suicidal isn't necessarily a ward sentence
If you feel like you need to hide something from your therapist, you should seek a new therapist.
And suicidal thoughts / ideation are to some degree always serious, regardless of how "actually" suicidal you feel. Take yourself / your psychological health seriously.
>>17362739
Suppose you broke your arm and went to a doctor, and for some reason he treated everything but your arm. Wouldn't you eventually say "Hey! I've got this broken arm, remember?"
So I've been dating this girl for a while and things have been going great, no problems or anything like that.
Today I think is when she trusted me with this but it was hard for her to tell. We were watching a movie and she just straight up started crying, I thought I did something but then she told me that she was assaulted two years ago.
It was by this guy whom she taught was a friend and driving her home after which he forced her to perform oral sex.
It was devastating to hear but I still don't know what to do. I told her it wasn't her fault and she said she's gotten over it and is much happier with me. Of course hearing this for the first time I wanted to kill the guy but she didn't want me to know his name or where he lived. At the time before we met she told her ex who was away and no else after.
I don't know what to do. Apparently I mentioned him once in a conversation and her ex knows him too so she told him a fake name that day.
Is it reasonable for me to go ahead and try finding him to confront him and "remind" him about it? I just can't accept that it just happened and he will get away with it.
Nah that's fucking movie shit and might get you in trouble.
Just leave all decisions to her, and if she wanted something done she would have probably done it by now. This isn't the 19th century, you don't have to defend her honor of whatever. Ask her if she wants to file a complaint and then move on.
>>17362707
not your fight OP
>So I've been dating this girl for a while and things have been going great, no problems or anything like that.
That's what she wants you to think.
>Today I think is when she trusted me with this but it was hard for her to tell. We were watching a movie and she just straight up started crying, I thought I did something but then she told me that she was assaulted two years ago.
She was emotional like fuck out of nowhere while just chilling with you, talking about (("assault"))
>It was by this guy whom she taught was a friend and driving her home after which he forced her to perform oral sex.
'Forced' cmon OP you should see what's happening by now
>It was devastating to hear but I still don't know what to do. I told her it wasn't her fault and she said she's gotten over it and is much happier with me. Of course hearing this for the first time I wanted to kill the guy but she didn't want me to know his name or where he lived. At the time before we met she told her ex who was away and no else after.
>"I told her it wasn't her fault and she said she's gotten over it and is much happier with me."
Is much happier with you compared to who? Her "assaulter"? Isn't that a given, and not something she'd comfort you with after telling you she likes to be forcefed dicks?
>I don't know what to do. Apparently I mentioned him once in a conversation and her ex knows him too so she told him a fake name that day.
Better find out the other side of the story bud
>Is it reasonable for me to go ahead and try finding him to confront him and "remind" him about it? I just can't accept that it just happened and he will get away with it.
No OP, not under any circumstance should you try to confront your womans assaulter, as you might find out you're bashing in the wrong head afterwards.
Anyways, IMO she cheated and feels bad now.
I could be wrong ofcourse
is it me, or are women more easily put off mid-sex? One awkward comment or whatever and I find many will instantly decide they want to stop, even if beforehand she was horny and was engaging in foreplay etc.
>>17362699
I don't know, I really cant relate to that because I'm pretty easily put off myself and I'm a guy. It has happened to me a few times that I lose my erection because of something she does or says, and I need to start it up again and focus before I can continue...
Doesn't happen to me often, of course, but it has happened a few times, while I've only had one experience where she was put off.
>>17362699
What was the comment?
"I wonder if your mom's tits look the same as yours" will probably turn her off
>>17362699
Perhaps you're bad at sex
Does anyone else experience random anxiety while traveling? At random times over random things? The last 3 trips I've taken the first 2 days I feel super fucked up. Can't eat, and just feel tense. Then after a few days it starts to fade. But it's every fucking trip and it pisses me off. Like, I flew Business Class for the trip I just took and couldn't even enjoy it because my stomach was so damn flustered.. My vacation is over now and I'm about to head home, when I went through Customs I didn't feel nervous, but I know I acted nervous which makes no sense because I'm not doing anything wrong. The agent was looking at me weird. I'm actually surprised they didn't screen me again based off nervous behavior.
I really hate this shit. It's every single trip. Before I go, I feel ready and look forward to the trip. But once I go, I feel fucked up the whole time. I haven't been able to finish a meal in the past 3 days...
Just seeing if anyone else deal with this shit. I'm fucking tired of this, I can't enjoy anything.. I'm going to try to get a appointment with a therapist or something
I have this problem. Big time.
The bigger problem is that I travel for my job 1-4 times per month.
It's my hobby to do things I really really hate.
The way I deal with it.... is that I just do it as much as I can and the anxiety diminishes with each time.
ocd about a terrorist attack
>>17363505
no, not at all
i want to make a facebook (for the bitches) but i dont want certain people to ever come across my profile and preferably never know it exists. Is there a way i can ensure they never know about it?
They can usually find you through your e-mail, but I think FB has some options to get rid of this. I'd use a new e-mail that never interacted with any of these people just in case though.
block them?
>>17362671
Kill them.