File: 1464146041668.jpg (170KB, 809x960px) Image search:
[Google]
170KB, 809x960px
My girlfriend is the love of my life, I can't imagine my life without her
But she's emotionally and even sometimes physically abusive. I can't stand the constant threats to cheat when she's upset or jealous over the littlest things, constantly telling me she doesn't love me then rarely rectifying it and saying she does
I know she loves me deep down inside because of she she still logs in to Skype and messages me saying sarcastic mean things, but I know inside she's hurting and feeling hurt but she loves me but she also wants us over. So confused
How do I leave my emotional abuser when I know she still loves her, and I love her enough to still care about her feelings of missing me?
29 Posts / 2 Images
View this topic
>>
i have the exact same problem except my gf is also gaining weight and im starting to find her less attractive. she won't change op. she's always gonna be that way. and if yall get married shes going to step it up a notch and say shes going to divorce you every time she gets mad. if you want something better there's always women out there (assuming you're a normie who has somewhat regular social skills, even within nerds) who won't say that hate you on a normal basis.
>>
does her name start with a?
>>
>>17385507
Is it worth putting up with the abuse and just staying with her?
I feel like if I give up on her and us, I'm giving up on the concept of love itself and will never find a true nice love like I had with her again.
File: f583b4f57f_500.jpg (46KB, 500x313px) Image search:
[Google]
46KB, 500x313px
I'm almost 28. I have bipolar disorder, but I'm working and living on my own for the first time in awhile. My job is temporary, but should become permanent soon.
Is it worth trying to date when I don't have health benefits or a means of paying for my apartment, besides my savings?
I haven't had a promising date in almost four years since I dumped my last girlfriend. I'm a bit nervous and lost a good amount of my confidence/sense of self in college. I've regained some semblance of my personality, but it's difficult to keep because I have to turn it off whenever I go to the office.
I don't want to get stuck in the same rut before where I lose my personality and compromise too much to keep a romantic relationship. At this point in my life, I'm strong willed enough to dump them when it gets too bad. The reason my last relationship lasted as long as it did was because it was the first time I had a consistent source of sex.
I'm happy masturbating and roleplaying online. Dating a lady who may or may not complicate my life and hurt my psyche isn't something I want to do, and I don't want to risk placing myself in that position again.
What should I do?
16 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385492
BUMP
>>
>>17385492
Bump. Help, please.
>>
get a laid back girlfriend who won't stress you out or demand you pay for things
In short, one of my best friend fucked my (now ex) GF of 3 years while I was at work. I kicked her out of my apartment and I'm trying to forget all this. But I can't help but think about this guy and how he stabbed me in the back. And everytime I think I boil inside and just want to take my car, break his door open and punch his teeth... And worse.
I just don't know what to do to get over it. I feel like the only relief would come from beating him up.
What can I do ?
Pic unrelated, it's my cat.
Also not a native speaker.
37 Posts / 12 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385481
Try some fighting sport to let the anger out.
Noice cat
>>
>>17385485
Can you do fighting sports even if you have glasses ? I can't see shit without them too...
I'm doing Badminton in club.
But to be honest, these thoughts all come back when I'm alone, doing nothing. When I'm working I'm fine. But, like right now, I'm lying in bed just thinking about it and it's killing me.
>>
File: 18phNja.jpg (64KB, 500x377px) Image search:
[Google]
64KB, 500x377px
I'm in a pretty fucked up situation /adv/, and there are so many emotions at play here that I really can't logically process anything. Any outside perspective would be greatly appreciated.
So I started dating this bipolar chick 2 years ago. Things have been rocky since fucking always but because I'm such a pussy with a savior complex I decided I'd try to stick it through and see if I could help her improve. She has slowly consumed my entire life and relies on me for absolutely everything (mental, emotional, financial) and has random breakdowns all the time. One time I told her we could use space and she basically tried to OD, and threatens to hurt herself if I don't spend every moment with her.
Meanwhile, I met this amazing girl who shares all of this attraction with me. We started texting (first mistake) and at first it was just as kind of a relief from all the pressure of my situation, but it started to escalate into feelings. One thing led to another and she invited me out, we hung out, and long story short we wound up having incredible sex.
Now the vibe with the new girl has become something where I'd like to pursue something serious with her. She feels the same way but I have no idea how the fuck to navigate this situation.
Last weird thing is at first I didn't feel any guilt about what happened, but it's almost as if the instant I cheated, my girls mood problems disappeared. Mind you I haven't spoken to her about anything, and yet she's been cooking for me, random backrubs, initiating sex all the time. And it's been multiplying my guilt like crazy.
tl;dr bipolar girlfriend of 2 years is abusive and consumes my life, met amazing different girl and slept with her, trying to figure out how to exit relationship without bipolar girl killing herself because she's head over heels in love with me.
6 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
Bump. Anybody with experience would be appreciated.
>>
This is a difficult and all around shitty situation to be in, but you have to realize the part you played in it. You knew how serious her issues were and while you no doubt had some part of good intentions, there is also some cowardice and lack of character involved here, or you wouldn't be so happy to - one way or another - leave the situation now that you have a good alternative. That screams that you have known (and mourned, and processed) that this relationship wasn't working and wasn't going anywhere a long time ago. Yet you didn't act then, only now that there's a temptation coaxing you into acting.
So take that as a wake up call that you have some stuff to work out for yourself there.
I don't see a deus ex machina here. You'll have to break up with her and accept that she will go insane and perhaps try to kill herself. Research your options for informing police or helplines if you are worrying. If she has any friends, inform them of the break up and tell them to keep a close eye on her to make sure she isn't doing something stupid. Look into possibilities to potentially get someone put in psychiatric care against their will if you have clear signs that they will likely harm themselves otherwise in your specific reason. Honestly I would just try to consult a psychiatrist or therapist to get a clear idea of what your options are in case something goes wrong.
Ultimately it's on her, though. What are you gonna do? Live your life by her side so she won't off herself? Of course not. Take the leap already, and learn something from all this.
>>
>>17385518
Damn, you're right. I don't think I have accepted enough responsibility for my part in this, and a lot of this is incredible advice. Thank you so much for the response, I've got some thinking/planning to do.
File: 1111111110101.jpg (53KB, 826x580px) Image search:
[Google]
53KB, 826x580px
I really, really, like this guy. He's a total nerd and no model, but I think he's cute and funny. He's been very helpful to me and we've talked a little bit about this and that. He basically told me he's here to help me out with stuff anytime and I shouldn't hesitate to ask. Problem is, I may seem cold and uninterested even though I'm NOT. I'm just very slow to warm up and relax around people so I don't talk very much and act distant for a long time. I'd like to spend more time with him, but I can't think of any good excuse to hang out right now. I don't know if he'd be interested in getting to know me or if he's just being nice, so I hesitate getting too personal. Well, except maybe he's tried to get to know me, but I haven't been too open and enthusiastic so maybe he thinks I don't want to get too personal. Fuck.
I don't even know why I'm here, /adv/. I already know what I should do: just tell him how I feel. But somehow I can't do it, goddammit. I have never made a move on anybody, it's always the other way around. And honestly I don't want to risk making things awkward, because I want to stay in good terms with him no matter what.
8 Posts / 3 Images
View this topic
>>
Just do it you stupid bitch
>>
>>17385452
ITT: underage b8 debates telling hardware store clerk she has a crush on him
Whatever you do, don't try to explain your feelings to him. You are very boring when you do that.
>>
Would you have said yes if he asked you out?
I'm obsessed with my last therapist. Everywhere I go I check if she's nearby. I hear her voice. I keep having the thought that I should impress her. Should I?
5 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385419
No. You have nothing to offer her
>>
>>17385419
Better give up. She will never see you as an equal in terms of doctor-patient relationship.
>>
>>17385443
What would it take?
>Beautiful woman from other country in town
>we are all at my bisexual girlfriends apartment
>gf and I want a threesome
>Gf isn't doing any legwork for it
>I flirt, tell guest I'm attracted to her one night
>this isn't working how we expected
How do I get my shy girlfriend to do the legwork here? I keep feeding her lines to get the conversation where it needs to be and ultimately, she needs to be the one that initiates this, correct?
I have three more nights to make this work. If someone can provide solid tips, I'll post photos of it happening as proof.
12 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385415
First post pics of the women in question.
>>
Are you quite sure that your girlfriend is 100% on board with this? Could it be that she finds the idea very hot, but now that this flesh and blood intimidatingly beautiful woman is in front of her, she suddenly finds herself feeling more insecure or jealous than she expected?
Yes, it is more logical that she tests the waters. It is kind of a dick move to hit on a woman and then reveal that you just want her to be a third, and if the girl's any decent she will be put off by your overt flirting while you are in a relationship.
I'd sit your girlfriend down (provided that you haven't discussed and agreed upon this very recently) and ask her again if this is what she wants, and if she wants it with this woman. If the answer is yes, lay it out for her that you look like a cheating creep if you hit on her, and that your girlfriend can "flirt" and be silly with her and dance with her with much less suspicion and see if there's chemistry there.
And lay out very clear boundaries beforehand about what is and isn't allowed. Including a safeword.
>>
>>17385415
Unless you are a sociopathic monster, you should not be doing anything. This person is visiting from another country with no place else to go, and you start telling them you want sex? That's pressuring them into it because they think you might kick them out if not. Use your head man.
All my threesomes involved alcohol and a female initiating the whole process.
File: images.jpg (7KB, 194x259px) Image search:
[Google]
7KB, 194x259px
So me and my boyfriend(my very first boyfriend) have been together for 2 months. We are both 19. Last night when we started to have sexual intercourse for the first time he asked me a question in wich i thought was very wierd. He asked me if i can give him a rim(pretty much licking his ass). I did not know what that was until he explained it to me. But instead of just licking it he wanted me to penetrate him with my tongue until he ejaculates. So i rejected what he asked me to do to him and instead we just continued to casual sex. Should i feel bad? Or should i give it to him? He is a nice softspoken guy and very very respectful to me but this rimjob seems really really weird to me and keep in mind we have been together for 2 months and he is my first boyfriend so... i dont know.
26 Posts / 3 Images
View this topic
>>
Don't do anything you are not comfortable with.
>>
>Should i feel bad?
No. Especially if he's your first bf and this is your first time having sex it's pretty weird for him to ask.
You have a responsibility to your partner, including sexually, but don't do thins you don't feel comfortable doing. You have plenty of time in the future to explore
>>
>>17385385
I think the big problem with butt stuff (aside from easier transmission of STI's) is that there are a lot of bacteria in the intestinal tract (including large intestines) that can make you sick if you ingest them or get them where they don't belong. You can reduce the risk by him cleaning well beforehand (i.e. shower) and if you don't actually shove your tongue into his asshole but just lick around the outside instead.
I'm pretty much willing to do whatever sex stuff my partner asks for when I'm in a committed relationship except for things that are dangerous to either of us or that just make me deeply uncomfortable (I won't hit, cut, or choke).
I've had girlfriends in the past who liked butt sex or having a finger in her asshole, and that's fine though a lube and a way to wash up are pretty much required. There are dental dams made specifically for oral sex, so if you do decide to shove your tongue into his asshole, get some (use lube on the asshole side). He might also enjoy a finger in his ass while he's fucking you, and that may seem less gross to you. Make sure your hands are clean, that you don't have any cuts on your finger, and that your nails are smooth. Use lube. Don't be surprised if you run into shit -- this is the place where it comes from. Wash your hands after.
File: images (2).jpg (7KB, 185x272px) Image search:
[Google]
7KB, 185x272px
Im being emotionally abused by family and friends. What do I do?
20 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
could you give us a little info as to why?
also, what they're doing specifically
>>
>>17385343
It's probably because op told them about a sexual assault.
>>
>>17385340
stop being such a pussy
File: Screenshot (3).png (303KB, 981x1961px) Image search:
[Google]
303KB, 981x1961px
Why are women such cunts?
Roughly 4 weeks ago a chick "accidentally" texted me a picture of her vagina. After I told her she had the wrong number, she freaked out, but I decided I'd try to converse with her because I'm a kissless virgin and what else did I have to lose. Turns out she goes to the same college as me, but is two years older. We kept talking, and one night about 2 weeks later she starts dirty talking and we end up sexting. This happens every few days up until this week. She had been talking about how much she was looking forward to meeting me when school starts back, and at this point I was too.
This past Saturday I suggested meeting up because I had nothing better to do and it would only be a 4 hour drive for both of us to meet half way, as I am away from school for the summer. Instead she tells me she wants to fly to me, which I tell her she shouldn't do because that'll cost to much. She insisted, so we made plans. I was supposed to pick her up at the airport yesterday afternoon, except she never came. I texted her, called her, snapchatted her, all with no response at all. I know she's alive because she opened the snapchat, but she didn't send anything back.
What the fuck would be the motivation for doing this? I know she's a real person. I checked google for the nudes she sent, all came back with no results. She's snapchatted me multiple times. However, when I checked my school's website I didn't find anyone matching her name and major.
I have absolutely no idea why someone would fuck with me like this. What's the pay off? I only offered to cover the hotel, and since she didn't show up she didn't benefit from that. Can anyone shed some light on this? Dealt with a similar situation?
26 Posts / 4 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385306
She didn't want you in the end. Changed her mind.
Maybe, the problem is you.
>>
>>17385314
lol thanks man
>>
I'd guess she just wants to feel validated. Once she got your validation, she moved on.
Anonymous
Standards/Brainwashing 2016-07-23 18:50:28 Post No.17385273
[Report] Image search: [Google]
Standards/Brainwashing 2016-07-23 18:50:28 Post No.17385273
[Report] Image search: [Google]
File: alexis renlucas-passmore-2014-09.jpg (428KB, 683x1024px) Image search:
[Google]
428KB, 683x1024px
I've been looking ad so much porn, that i hardly get aroused by real woman anymore. It's like serious brainwashing.
Is there a way to change this?
11 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385273
sounds obvious but have you tried to stop watching porn?
>>
>>17385273
oh no, its retarded
>>
Stay away from porn degenerate
Anonymous
Compartmentalising trauma 2016-07-23 18:35:25 Post No.17385222
[Report] Image search: [Google]
Compartmentalising trauma 2016-07-23 18:35:25 Post No.17385222
[Report] Image search: [Google]
Compartmentalising trauma
Anonymous
2016-07-23 18:35:25
Post No. 17385222
[Report]
[View this topic]
So, I want some feedback on one of my trauma management techniques.
In this technique, I get myself into deep focus. I imagine two people. One feels the trauma. The other consoles it.
The second provides physical and rational reassurance on the matter, and seldom shows effective emotion. The former may feel and express emotion in response to the trauma.
I like to think of it as a 'means to cry without crying'; it is internalised comfort.
Is this faggot tier? Good? Bad? Is it absolving or feeding negativity? What do you think /adv/?
7 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
Well, that's great if you're trying to never actually address the problem.
Are you impaired cognitively? How in the fuck is this supposed to make you better?
You're masturbating in front of a full-length mirror and watching the show.
Seriously, quit with the self-indulgent navel-gazing. Seek help and work towards solving the problem, not marinating in it.
>>
>>17385254
I can't just not feel these things. If I don't do a controlled burn it becomes heavily intrusive. Flashbacks, outbursts of anger and shit. I tried to get therapy but when their solution was 'lol ignore it' and 'pretend it didn't happen', I don't know how to work through these things.
>>
>>17385222
Is this helpful for you? Does it help you cope with whatever your trauma is and function?
Because that's what really matters. Fuck what other people of it.
File: Goddamn.png (709KB, 1064x927px) Image search:
[Google]
709KB, 1064x927px
How do you stop being a pretentious, hypersensitive faggot?
My parents have always insisted I do my best and make them proud. They would always brag to our family about my results and activities, they made me apply for the best high school in town, and they were always glad when I won contests yearly.
They allowed me to go for psychology (instead of medicine) and I studied hard, only to receive the results today and see that I'm on the tax list (not the free, government paid spots).
They said they don't mind, but I know they're probably disappointed. I'm really embarrassed of my failure and I considered committing seppuku for bringing shame to family. I've been crying and drinking since yesterday. It's always been like this, whenever something doesn't go my way I overthink it, dramatize it and go full emo.
Tell me /adv/, what the hell do I do to stop being a piece of shit? I'm emotionally unstable and self harm whenever things go bad, I would've been dead a long time ago if I wasn't concerned about my parents.
Long story short, I'm pathetic and I don't know how to change that. Help pls, I'll draw you something in return.
11 Posts / 3 Images
View this topic
>>
File: 11168881_890263901055800_1242483406257593862_n.jpg (34KB, 500x678px) Image search:
[Google]
34KB, 500x678px
>>17385164
man the fuck up, beta faggot
>>
>>17385170
Gr8 advice
But OP it's sounds like your doing fine . Reality is you may have an Inferiority complex . Perhaps go see a therapist about that
>>
>>17385183
Fucking pussies and their thrapists.
Why are you so weak?
File: images (1).jpg (11KB, 251x201px) Image search:
[Google]
11KB, 251x201px
How do you deal with your entire family treating you like a liar after being sexually assaulted?
15 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
>>17385141
You don't. You set fire to their house(s) and have a martini
>>
>>17385141
Simple, they are clearly not supportive and as such find another avenue of support. Friends, school, social workers. In your mind let them go, as they have seemingly already done for you.
>>
They only started treating me like crap after I told them about it, it's victim-blaming.
Anonymous
Suffering auditory hallucinations. Is there any low level help I can get? 2016-07-23 18:00:55 Post No.17385130
[Report] Image search: [Google]
Suffering auditory hallucinations. Is there any low level help I can get? 2016-07-23 18:00:55 Post No.17385130
[Report] Image search: [Google]
Suffering auditory hallucinations. Is there any low level help I can get?
Anonymous
2016-07-23 18:00:55
Post No. 17385130
[Report]
[View this topic]
I lived with my grandmother for about two years after graduating college. I moved out a couple of months ago.
Recently, past two weeks or so, I've been hearing her voice, usually when trying to concentrate on something. The voice isn't compelling me to do anything, in fact, while I can make out individual words, the "messages" as a whole are always stuttering gibberish. It's extremely worrying and more than a little annoying.
Is there any way to banish this without serious medication, which I'm more than a little leery of?
11 Posts / 1 Images
View this topic
>>
Well I have auditory hallucinations and im on medication now but I battled it without medication for a few years I checked myself into a mental ward twice and they medicated me but then I would stop taking the medications thinking it would go away. the times I checked in I was hearing multiple voices and it was driving me bonkers. I think john nash may either live with his hallucinations now knowing they aren't real or they went away . I also read somewhere that like 40% of peoples go away without medication but only time will tell.
>>
OP here again, 2 other points to add that may or may not be relevant:
1) stuttering gibberish is pretty in line with grand mom's regular speaking patterns, it often takes 2-3 passes to grasp her points.
2) one of the major irritances of living with grandmom was her inability to tell when I was working from home, and then interrupting me.
I think at least partially, in my amateur way, that this is my brain artificially recreating a former environment. Don't know if that happens though.
>>
>>17385160
I usually hear my ex girlfriends voice and a lot of the time its not discernible. I read somewhere that it has to do with synaptic pruning and the brain pruning the wrong synapses.