Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 4294. page

She's bad for you. Unhealthy.
You're bad for her.
Maybe in 5 years.
In another world, maybe.
I know you want her.
But it's not helping you or her.
So leave.

What do?

You clearly know what to do here, last paragraph said it all. You need to leave her before it gets even worse.

>>17444731
>>17444735
Honestly, thank you for the replies, really the only thing is I know it will crush her but in the end it will be better for her because she might grow from it as a person, but she may not and I really worry she'll hurt herself in the mean time

So you're afraid that people are going to call your a child because you found somebody you wanted to spend your life with, and didn't fuck around?


...Wow.

So, you have to resolve to do a MTF transition, but not enough to get over the thought of others projecting their values on to you?

I don't buy that.

I understand how you feel to an extent, though. This is life, the only one you are assured. To not be able to explore something you want to explore is a terrible thing. However, sacrifices must be made. Are you going to sacrifice the integrity of your relationship for the sole sake of seeing a vagina, or are you going to sacrifice seeing a vagina for the sake of your relationship?

>>17444736
I guess it does sound kind of hard to buy, I didn't really elaborate just how strongly I worried about how others perceived me: childhood of bullying, verbal abuse, etc.

For some reason transitioning and looking for a serious relationship were both priorities to put above what others think of me, but in the background I'll always worry about what people think of me.

It makes me feel like I can't relate to other people, though, because of all of this, like there's something horribly wrong with me. But that's probably another issue.

There was also the matter of I hate that there's something I want to do but can't, but you're right, sacrifices are a required thing I guess

>>17444711
"I'm afraid people will think of me as a child if I don't do something extremely childish; like dumping a girl I'm in a long, stable, happy relationship with for the sake of seeing a cis pussy!"

The only people concerned with seeming adult and not being called childish are people who are in fact children at heart. Grow up, if you have a 2 year relationship you're happy with and still in love with her, you have something a lot of us on this website would kill for. The only people who would fault you for that are people even more immature than you.

Stick with it.
You're used to instant gratification so anything that doesn't immediately result in accomplishment or entertainment you drop.

>>17444627
Put on Eminem and work out

werks for me

>>17444630
This. Is like being hooked on easy habits.

>life is otherwise perfect
>but without disney princess fairytale i want to kill self

either your life ISNT perfect (as in, its satisfactory but brings no joy) or you are just a retarded exaggerator.

>pic is me

you are reaosnably attractive, id change your hair and bulking up wouldnt hurt, but you should be able to score a gf of some variety. the question is, what is your 'settling point'. you havent explained your approach to women at all so there isnt much we can say except
>go ask girls out

>>17444653
Well as in perfect i mean having nothimg to worry about like money or housing
And i just want to know how to approach girls and what to say and such without making it awkward

>>17444667

girls are not robots all running the same program. each girls different. there are general rules, but you are clearly over thinking them.

the best way to learn is to do. just go up and say hi. you discover what works best FOR YOU cuz something that people dont tell you is that one size does NOT fit all. someone will be able to do an approach that wont work at all for you. you can do approaches that wont work for them.

and the most important thign you will ever hear:
>even the most successful people fail 90% of the time.

dont act like there is some cloaked man in the sky with a magic chalkboard keeping score of how many women jizz themselves when you talk to them. stop thinking that there is some secret facebook group where you get rated by girls who reject you and leave comments saying 'LOL ANON ASKED ME OUT WHAT A LOSER LETS NEVER DATE HIM TROLOLOLOL'.

ten minutes later, they forget you asked them out. cuz the only one who takes you as seriously as you do, is yourself. the girls dont care. they either like you or they dont, and if they dont like you, they forget you exist in ten minutes so you have nothing to worry about

>>17444621
>Her: why you getting funny at me
>Me: I'm not
>Her: I've seen the messages
>Me: You know what I want, and I can't just be 'some friend'
>Her: Well fuck you then
>Her: I already have enough shit I don't need you on it
>Me: Then don't, I just want to help you through it if I can and be with you
>Her: You have really pushed it now so no
>Her: Why talk to her in the first place
>Me: Because you never tell me anything, or what's bothering you
>Her: So you assume its you?
>Me: I don't assume anything, I just don't know what to think anymore or what you want from me
>Her: Why not just leave it
>I don't want anything from you
>hour later
>this is why we shouldn't get back together all we do is hurt each other
>not going to say anything?

>>17444622

good job OP, keeping cool calm and collective.

>>17444622

OP, i'd forget about ever getting her back, act single and she's just a random girl trying to get in your harem or a girl hungry for your gold cock and trying to consider if you should throw her a bone and when she texts you, take however long you want to reply 3 days, 5days, 10 days and type very short, no longer than hers. things like "k" and "yeah.". if you call her keep it short, 5mins.

In the meanwhile just improve yourself mentally and physically, learn more about women. She may or may not come back, but she's no good to you now man.

Bump bait

>>17444595
It's important to know that the day after I "broke" the door, he and his guests at the house began threatening to physically hurt me if I ever came back.

Then when I returned just to feed my pets and change my clothes, he trapped me in the bedroom and verbally and physically assaulted me and wouldn't let me leave, he'd pick me up and carry me back to the bedroom to fight with me. He had his new girlfriend videotape him fighting me and then edited out the parts where he is attacking me. They showed the leftover videos to the police and I was arrested, then he got a restraining order against me while I was in jail. I'm still waiting for my court date to tell the judge my side of the story.

I believe I will win in court and will be able to return to my house, but will the rental company actually have the right to refuse to let me return to my home?

File: image.jpg (207KB, 2560x1440px) Image search: [Google]

207KB, 2560x1440px

>>17444620
This is what the rental company sent me. Seems extremely informal. And they are listing "divorce" and "domestic residence" as a reason to have my lease terminated immediately....?

>Falling for the SnapChat meme

>>17444588
Please elaborate

She's getting off with the gratification of being wanted.

leetspeak.

1337sp34k

|_3375|>34|<

>>17444530
>I'm entitled to be found attractive

Literal rapist logic. Pretty sure you're trolling though.

>>17444530

You can put a little more effort into your bait, for starters.

Oh, who am I kidding. inb4 300 replies debating the legitimacy of transgenderism

>>17444530
I would get mad If someone sold me a beer to find out it was actually piss

bump again, serious question

>>17444517
Mate, that is fucking disgusting. You want to eat out a hooker? Itd probably be more sanitary to go to the local rubbish dump and swim in the filth naked.

>>17444517
if you're fucking a classier, more expensive prostitute, most things should be relatively safe. If you're fucking a gutter whore that you payed a tenner for, then it would be a bad idea to do damn near anything outside of a hazmat suit.

HOWEVER, this is sex with people you know little to nothing about, so you're taking a risk no matter what.

>>17444425
what is your question?

>>17444427
Is it wrong that this felt so right?

>>17444425
that isn't revenge but fulfilling a fantasy for her

>>17444385
You will, stay out of relationships for awhile

....bait.bait.idiots.idiots everywhere o.o

>>17444393
It is no bait. Oh god how I wish it was.
>>17444388
I feel like this is the inevitable answer, but I'm just afraid that it could potentially lead to going full hermit mode, which is a thing I completely want to avoid at all costs

a girl not texting you doesn't make her an evil shitbag. she doesnt owe you anything, not even a text. Get used to it because it sounds like you have a lot more of this coming in your future senor neckbeard.

>>17444384
she is probably busy. bloody ell. sometimes i dont text people for a while if i am busy

>>17444396
She's the one who asked for my info initially. Fuck off, shitbag.

>>17444397
Really doubt it. We met her in the morning and it's late evening now. Surely you have the time to send one text.

>>17444381
WestPoint is not the only college for serious career soldiers. Good officers come out of ROTC and OCS as well. Look into those options. Anyway, you're in luck because I recently dropped out of there and you seem to be about to make the same mistake I did.

If you're career is the only thing you are looking forward to in life there is something wrong. Being in a stressful environment will distract you from this fact but it will keep coming back up I promise you that. Get your personal life in order before you try to put yourself through some tough shit. Keep working out, find some real friends, learn to enjoy people's company again. There's more to life than the Army.

If you're really serious about going to the academy get comfortable asking people for help especially in school. Chances are you will not be the best at anything while you are there (AND THATS OK). You are also going to need to get comfortable with yourself, not to the point of complacency but to where you can fail at something a few times without thinking you're an embarrassment. Don't let your self worth ride on your accomplishments or your ability to get girls. Self worth is kind of complicated thing for me and someone else could probably give better advice on it.

Anyway hope some of that was helpful best of luck man.

>>17444451
There isn't anything in my life that's exciting or interesting. I tried to be more exciting by talking to girls but if anything tat showed me how socially retarded I can be.

The army seems like an out to me, I've always been interested in military history and other military related stuff and it seems like a way for me to get out of my shit-tiered town and leave behind people that never cared about me.

I'm not trying to sound like an emo faggot that's literally the last thing in the world I'd ever consider myself being but in perspective that's how I see it as an out.

You probably just come on too strong or appear too desperate. Girls can get a bit freaked out if a guy she just met is really intense.

shameful bump

Reading this really hits me in the feels. I'm in a really codependent/physiologically draining relationship with a girl I love but who makes me miserable. She can be violent so my counselor and attorney (free consults) say I can't do it in person, but it feels so wrong.

A girl once did to me what she did to you, I think you did nothing wrong and it's her own way of thinking that resulted in the break up, sometimes there can be so many reasons that it's impossible to say, but given your post i believe you are a good person and you should move on as best you can, good luck my friend

>>17444366

Is it bad if I have been left by my ex gf of three years but I ghosted her in the end?

It was a distance relationship and I'm already surprised it lasted as long as it did.

>inb4 i've been savagely cucked, no I don't think so and it doesn't matter anymore anyways

We broke up because she moved from her native place to study and after a few months she wanted to be free to live her life and find out who she was, I could hardly argue with that but I was quite devastated, and whhen I learned that in am atter of weeks she was already with a guy 8 years older than her (she's 1 year younger than me) I just couldn't bear the fact that I would wait a looong time before I'd get up on my feet relatipnship-wise

So I ghosted without much excusing it. Does that make me a shitbag?