How do you stop smoking, if willpower alone isn't working? Sport/Eat a lot?
Is it even "worth" it?
Ask yourself why you're asking this question. Honestly, you're not looking for advice, you're looking for an enabler. You're playing a game of "alcoholic" and "kick me".
http://www.ericberne.com/games-people-play/alcoholic/
The only thing that goes into quitting, ultimately, is not smoking. It will probably take more than one try, and you will probably have to examine yourself, and figure out what is inside of you that prevents you from doing what you really want. Good luck
You'll have to start exercising a lot. Exercise generates chemicals in the brain that counteract the effects of stress on your CNS. You WILL need this. It's like a natural benzo.
>>17488880
Buy Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking - second hand of amazon.
This booked worked for me.. It actually made me look forward to life as a non-smoker.
Your mindset is probably - 'I have to give up this thing I enjoy'
you might want to start getting the habit of thinking 'do i really enjoy this? because maybe its an addiction'.
Like most things in life if you want to do X
find the best book called How to do X.
I sucked a trannies cock off a few days and thought it was fine because he identified as a girl so im still straight. But now I find out it was just a crossdressing fag. Does that make me gay now? I mean I thought he identified as a girl...
1/10 on your shitty bait
>>17488851
as long as balls didn't touch you're fine
Did she shoot hot cum in your boi pucci?
I have thought a lot about how should I write about my issue to ask you for advice, and I have decided to simplify the things as much as possible.
So here is the situation:
1. Broke up with love of my life 5 years ago. We both know we had something very special, I ended up with a model type girl very good looking smart but it was not IT. My love is now in relationship for 3 years.
2. After the model looking girl I ended up with a very good looking not so bright but loves me(at least I think she does) and got her pregnant. She is looking forward to the baby and us living together. We are 1 year now together. Baby is due in 6 months.
3. I think more and more about my first love and how different she was, about the connection we had it was really special - she knew things about me no one did and loved me more than anyone else.
Options?
Marry my current pregnant girl and try to make a great husband and a father(always wanted a family actually).
Or
Not marry but be there for the baby and pursue my true love(I have a feeling she would decide for me if I tell her how I feel)
If I pursue true love I am going to loose the mother of my child and there is a chance my true love will kick me in the nuts and spit on me - when I broke with her I was an asshole, got blinded by the beauty of the other girl and everyday problems that every couple mets..
It has been 5 years so maybe my brain did some alterations to make that first girl a lot better than she actually was but in my heart I know I felt more relaxed when alone or in a company with others.
I am 28 now and live in SE Europe. Current pregnant girl is 21. True love is 27. Ex model girl is 24.
What would you do?
Anyone?
>>17488848
Your first and most important responsibility here is the well being of your child.
You fucked up, it sucsk. You're probably going to regret leaving your "true love" forever. But right now the most important thing is that your child needs two loving and good parents. I bet the pregnant girl wouldn't be festive if you left her for an ex when she's 6 months pregnant.
Unless you're unhappy with your child's mom, move on, forget about your "true love" and be a decent man.
>>17488848
Move on from your ex bro. Clearly it wasn't meant to be. She's happy now and with someone else and I think you're better off facing the future rather than dwelling in the past. Going back to her not only will ruin two lives (your child and her current bf) but its also a very selfish choice. If your prego gf loves you and you're happy together then it is a very asshole move of you to leave her just because of your selfishness.
I'm not a parent but want to be one.
I don't want my kid to be disobedient, undisciplined and lacking of self control. I think those are important for a good citizen, and will be the only thing I demand of the kid.
What do I do to get that?
Then don't be that parent who micromanages every aspect of their kids' lives
Be those things yourself, and as long as you don't have some glaring personality flaw that hinders your child's development they will acquire those characteristics through osmosis.
Although it is incredibly unlikely you possess any of the abilities you wish to see in your child and are probably going to sabotage their development with your unrealistic expectations, which, although not unachievable are unlikely considering that this hypothetical child's father is asking for advice on how to groom said child into success that the father could never achieve himself.
>>17488847
Be a good example.
Be calm and understanding, communicate what you expect your kid to do and explain to them why they should do so.
Punish them and reward them when needed.
Do not use violence.
Be constant.
People tell me I look like julia styles, does she look okay?
>>17488824
I like how she looked in the first Bourne movie. Never minded her in the other ones.
>>17488824
looks good to me
>>17488835
thank fuck shes dead now
>b-bourne?! th-theres-s anuther program, help?
>Bourne: just leave me alone already
So, a couple of weeks ago my boyfriend finally told his mother that his dad is cheating on her with her bestfriend, but somehow the whole situation has been turned on us.
My boyfriend is 24 and has known about their affair since he was 17. He never told because he didn't want to break his family apart and hurt his mom. We were planning on telling her after we had enough money to move out, but in a spur of the moment my boyfriend ended up telling her after his dad threatened to kick us out... and now she thinks we made it all up because he threatened to kick us out, lol.
The thing is that we literally have ZERO proof, even though the homewrecker comes and parks her car right in front of the house while my boyfriends mom is at work, and they proceed to do it in my boyfriends dad's truck on the driveway. We never took pictures of them because she always comes when it's dark out and if we took a picture we would have to use flash - that would obviously give us away.
They're using the excuse that my boyfriends dad has been fixing her car and his mom has completely eaten it up. Not only that, but she's now going around and telling their whole family and her friends. She keeps on hanging out with her "bestfriend" every weekend and me and my bf are being shunned and called liars, lol. To top it off, my boyfriends dad and the homewrecker are being more careful now, so I have no idea how we're going to get them caught.
This whole situation is really annoying. Receiving dirty looks and being painted as a liar is really fucking enraging and I want the truth to come out. Any ideas on how to get these 2 fuck faces done in?
it's your boyfriend's family, not yours. let him handle it himself. anything you do will just be seen as shit stirring and there's at least a 50% chance your bf will get pissed at you for interfering in his family business. you're not married, you're not even engaged. you may get on with his family, you may even be *like* family to them, but you are not part of the family. it is a fine line but a very important one.
support your bf in whatever he decides to do about it, unless it's stupid. then tell him you don't think it's a good idea. then just leave it at that.
>>17488776
This is why you stay out of other peoples' personal shit. It never ends up good for you. Just learn the lesson for later.
Question for /adv: if someone's parents are adulterers, does that make it more likely that they will too become adulterers?
It's genetic, isn't it? I have a feeling OP's boyfriend will cheat one day as well
Honest question, is it true that most women contantly wish to be reminded that they are loved by their partner, and that they are big on receiving affection frequently?
I just ask because this seems like a bit of an odd thing to me is all. Maybe it's because i'm a guy. Maybe it's because I think that the love between two people is more of an unspoken, mutual understanding rather than something that needs to be constantly brought up. I dunno.
But from girls that i've talked to along with good old word of mouth I get the idea that a lot of -though not all obviously, I don't want to generalize - women in romantic relationships like to be reminded that they are loved, and that if a man does not do as such, then they are doing something wrong. Is there any truth to this?
>>17488754
Yeah, I surely appreciate being reminded I am loved.
People have different ways of understanding and showing love.
I am big on physical affection. I am very physically affectionate - kisses, hugs, cuddles, snuggling, whatever. I also tend to show love by making my partner's life easy - I like doing things like cooking for them, ironing and choosing their clothes, cleaning the house, reminding them their schedule. When it comes to feeling loved, tho, the thing that works best for me is being told nice things. Something small like a post it, or a small compliment, makes me feel adored.
Just think of how much you want sex, and that's how often women want to be reminded that they're loved,pretty, that they make delicious sandwiches, that they are good at whatever.
The reason men are always looking at porn is the same reason women are texting random dudes and posting hot photos to get likes. Same reward system in the lizard brain.
I'm a girl and my ex used to constantly remind me to the point that it became really repetitive and obnoxious. My boyfriend now only reminds me every so couple of days and does it randomly, which to me makes it more meaningful and genuine.
I guess most girls think it'd be nice to constantly be reminded they're loved, maybe they should all date my annoying ex and see how unnecessary and stupid it really is. :D
Sup /adv/. Long story short, I'm an r9ker / 4chaner that got sucked into a crazy party life in college. My female friend came over to my house today and we went to the most notroious frat in our college. She started getting cuddly with a guy and I told her that I was gonna leave after about an hour of that.
I did, but I feel like I should have stayed and baby sitted her.
We are very old friends and I'm afraid that I abandoned her at our most rapey frat. Did I do wrong, or is it not my problem?
A friend would have stuck around to make sure she was going to be okay, not gone home because they're butthurt she's getting with another guy. Don't call yourself her friend if you're not going to act like one
>>17488741
>crazy party life.
>goes to one party.
>ditches friend after an hour.
>crazy party life.
mfw
>>17488746
>A friend would have stuck around to make sure she was going to be okay
He's not her baby sitter. It's pretty stupid to expect friends to hang around a party they're not having fun at just so you can get finger banged at a frat house known for being full of rapists.
In fact the bigger question to me is why would you want to party at a place only known for date rape?
GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant.
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't fucking know.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.
>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.
>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off.
If you're a girl and you and a boy were attracted to each other would you wait indefinitely for him to make the first move? Or would you do it after a while? What if you're like super shy?
Ladies (and or gentlemen), I need a risk assessment before proceeding.
If we make eye contact a few times over about a month on public transport, would I be safe to strike up a conversation if the opportunity came up? Normally not on the prowl on a train of all places but feeling brave.
>>17488786
It depends on how much I liked him
>>17488787
What do you have to lose?
An online friend extremely close to me wants to make a tulpa because of their loneliness.
...How do I even react to this?
>>17488714
Accept that they are lonely, probably a little mentally unstable, and proceed from there. At that point you'll need to decide how much the friendship is worth to you.
>>17488714
I've seriously considered trying and read up on them a bit before. Overall, I'm glad I didn't go through with it, but I can understand how someone might want to, and feel pity for them. You have to be extremely lonely to consider something like this.
>>17488734
He's so close to me, and I dont want him to fuck up his brain.
I'm just so scared of losing him. I don't know what to do...
I met a nice girl, way too pretty to be talking to me and she likes me and thinks I'm sexy but she did say a couple of times that I'm weird and I hear that a lot from a lot of people including my friends and family. Although they say it in a positive way, I kinda get tired of hearing that I'm weird. It's not like I do weird stuff or anything, I'm quite social but maybe it's just the way I am...
Weirdo. What advice do you need?
Weird>Sheeple>Redneck>Boring.
>>17488689
How can I find out what's so weird about me? I know I can say weird shit if I'm trying to make someone laugh but it gets annoying if they feel the need to adress the weirdness over and over
Is it wrong to fantasize about a female platonic friend while masturbating?
>>17488649
Only if you're on public transport.
>>17488649
Everyone who has ever masturbated has done this.
Sounds pretty normal.
This may be a bit of a lengthy post so settle in.
I want to disappear, or goddamnit, I just want someone (a corporate entity, group, anything) to take me in and take care of me. I'll do anything, just please let me live.
I masturbate on and off (I've been doing this since HS to offset my depression/loneliness but it always makes it worse and makes me suicidal/even more depressed, the endorphin rush keeps me at it, i cant stop).
I've tried being normal etc and fitting in and atleast be accepted for once but nothing works, I'm always either ignored/looked at oddly.
Please god someone out there help me, I'll do anything, i cant take this anymore.
I can do some HTML/CSS, a tiny bit of Javascript etc, barely C++.
I don't even watch much TV anymore (if I do it's either NHK World or BBC International, only two I accept) please god, anyone out there.
I'm sound desperate but I am, I'm 20, I live with my grandmother and work down the street at a restaurant, I live in San Antonio, I said it, you know where I live. Take me in, accept me as one of your own.
Or, should I just disappear over to a remote place in Northern Europe, where its cold and nobody lives.
help me god.
I've debated becoming a nun or joining a cult. It'd be a nice change of pace for an anxious person like me. Good luck on your igloo
I've read your post a few times but I still can't really make out a problem. Are you depressed? Do you want to run away to start a new life? Or maybe you want to run away from it all and just hide?
newsflash, it isn't gonna get better. Do you really think if anyone took you away and took care of you it would get better? No. Maybe initially, but soon you'll be unhappy again with your unaccomplished life.
You wanna get better, work on improving yourself. Imo joining the army would be a good idea, you'll be part of a family, you'll focuss on bettering yourself, and you'll be doing something good. Not through begging but because of hard work.
>>17488666
Depressed and wanting to run away, army/military is out of the question due to how my parents are. People just don't like me.
Has anyone had casual, consensual sex, often?
Have you ever regretted it? Why? How old were you?
>>17488621
I don't understand your question? Are you thinking with many or? Because i've had sex plenty a times with my bf and we've been together since i was a teenager so..
>>17488621
I've had lots of casual sex (I'm assuming yu mean with different partners - I am straight, male 45 btw).
I've never regretted it due to any affects it's had on me but I've regretted it due to affects on some of the women.
I have been engaging in casual sex for 30 years, while single and married and with single, separated and married partners. Casual sex is best when each person is coming from a matched set of circumstances and worst when the is a situational inequality (like married guy, single girl).
>>17488634
>>17488634
>>17488634
>I have been engaging in casual sex for 30 years, while single and married and with single, separated and married partners. Casual sex is best when each person is coming from a matched set of circumstances and worst when the is a situational inequality (like married guy, single girl).
That's exactly what I'm getting at.
Different partners, often. I'm wondering if any of them regret it months, years later.
It seems silly, but i'm from the UK, and in my 20s and 30s have been making love with with the willing 17-27 age range.
since coming the US, i've not been able to keep many friends, and the age range here is 18+. A close friend argues ALL CASUAL SEX regardless of age, is psychologically damaging.
I'm seeking some confirmation or the opposite. As many cases as possible. I shouldn't care, and should be me, but I value this person.
Hey /adv/
I've been using the app Duolingo to learn German. I'm not the kind of auto-didact person but with this language I'm going serious.
The app is cool but I'd like to have also a book like those with excercises and songs and stuff like that, to learn more about grammar.
Anything would help.
So yeah, I forgot to ask:
Which book would you recommend? (Prefferably if it's available to download, yo-ho ho)
Optimal. There were torrents around. They also have separate exercise books.
>>17488596
Google "basic german textbook"