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Has anyone here ever called the suicide prevention hotline?
What was it like?
Seems to me like a waste of time if you are actually going to kill yourself; like what does it matter if some well-meaning person on the other side of the country doesn't want you to do it?
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I tried. waste of time.
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>>17505099
They actually put me on hold
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Put me on hold for ages as well
Wanted to die lol
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Sometimes I zone off for long periods of time and think up elaborate plans to ruin the lives of people I dislike. I'll just kind of stare off into the distance and think about it.
There's no way this is normal, right? As soon as I come back to my senses I feel like a fucking autist.
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Bump. Someone help me figure out what the fuck is wrong with me.
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>>17505179
Nothing.
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>>17505033
Anon, it's normal for you to think these thoughts. It's a way your brain reacts to anger/stress. As long as you don't have severe urges, you're fine.
That literally happens to me when I get angry at petty shit like that. I think of taking them out Hotline Miami/Drive style. I come up with these complex plans to take them out one by one without seeming guilty. Then I snap out of it and realize the stupid shit I came up with. Don't tell anyone you know though anon, that's just autistic.
gloomy (ID: !!Ic2RFa8e8bm)
Gloomy passed away 2016-08-28 06:49:01 Post No.17505023
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Gloomy passed away 2016-08-28 06:49:01 Post No.17505023
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Gloomy passed away
gloomy (ID: !!Ic2RFa8e8bm)
2016-08-28 06:49:01
Post No. 17505023
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Hey everyone.
Gloomy died 3 months ago. I was cleaning out his stuff and found hic /b/ folder and there was some /adv/ stuff there as well.
He lived 2 years more than he said and y'all helped him tremendously. Thanks for that.
post your last words here
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I don't know who that is.
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Damn. RIP. I remember his trip, I think I might even have helped him but its been a while
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>>17505023
Literally who?
Anonymous
Post orgasm dizziness 2016-08-28 06:43:55 Post No.17505005
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Post orgasm dizziness 2016-08-28 06:43:55 Post No.17505005
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I'm male. Occasionally shortly after orgasm I'll become dizzy, lightheaded, and have difficulty generating and connecting thoughts as though I'm lacking some core awareness, or working memory. I can't keep much in my head or understand how a given element relates with anything else I'm doing or saying. Like writing this right now, I'm quite literally incapable of making anything resembling a decision or choosing from a spectrum of ways to communicate what I mean to get across. It simply isn't possible, and it's maddening. Takes a while to go away.
Summarized. Dizzy, lightheaded, high resting heart rate, feel sick, braindead, etc. What might this be? It resembles a panic attack or an allergic reaction. It might be that my baseline dopamine levels are low enough that the phenylethylamine and prolactin release drives it down to a low enough range that it causes problems. Could also be that my MAO function is poor and levels are too high, but this is unlikely. Something is likely wrong with my brain, regardless.
Orgasms don't even feel that good anyway. Satisfying and pretty okay, but nothing too grand. Has anyone else experienced something similar?
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Sounds like dehydration and being a wimp. Drink some water and calm down
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>>17505018
>Sounds like dehydration and being a wimp.
Neither.
I'm fairly calm, but my hands feel strange and my brain isn't working properly.
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it seems another orgasm as caused it to rapidly resolve, this time.
What a strange life it's been.
Anonymous
How to make anal less painful 2016-08-28 06:31:09 Post No.17504974
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How to make anal less painful 2016-08-28 06:31:09 Post No.17504974
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How to make anal less painful
Anonymous
2016-08-28 06:31:09
Post No. 17504974
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So a while back I made a thread about how to reignite my marriage's sex life after some dull sex that lead me to an affair. So, incase anyone remembers it and is curious, I'll do a quick update before I ask the question but skip to the end if you don't care.
>Made clear to my husband I didn't expect anything in the divorce settlement more than a little help until I get a job(Informal help, no legally binding contract).
>Tried dressing up like a schoolgirl/teen and doing my makeup accordingly for when he got home from work
>Started spending 5 hours a week volunteering at my local children's hospital(I have a series of teach qualifications to boot, so it was a no brainer).
Its all early days still but yeah, now a new problem has come up.
My hubby's a new man after I start being more provocative in how I present myself. He knows what he wants and takes it, so in that regard its fine. Recently he wanted to try anal and assured me it was easy.
It wasn't. It was horrible.
I just bit my arm and got through it.
He loved it and wants to do it more, we used lots of lube but that hardly made it a joyous experience.
So yeah tl;dr
>How do you make anal more bearable.
Pic wholly unrelated
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despite what porn and tumblr sluts will tell you, there isn't anything. the majority of women despise anal, because there's literally nothing there for it to be pleasurable. it's the equivalent of your husband trucking your elbow, only with more germs and microtears and risk of infection and stds.
it's a tricky situation because you're trying to repair a marriage and he liked it, but honestly it's healthy and normal for both people to have boundaries, and if you really don't like anal sex you shouldn't have to do it. i'm sure there's something you're into your husband doesn't care for.
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>>17504995
Fucking virgin detected Jesus Christ.
Ease into it, and I'm not talking put it in slow I mean; During regular vaginal sex when you are close to orgasm try just a finger or SMALL vibrator in your ass and climax. After maybe 20+ orgasms with this you will associate anal with orgasm and you can move from there to a larger vib and eventually his dick.
Talking from experience here as my last 3 GF's and my current wife all hated anal with a passion but I found away to bypass this.
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>>17504995
I was worried this was the case too... That it wasn't just something you get used to and learn to love. I just want to be able to get to a point where I can make it look like I'm absolutely adoring it because I hope to limit it to something I only do on special occasions(By persuading him its bad for my health to do it too regularly).
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Hey /adv/ I live in a third world country. I finished university awhile back and now have the equivalent of $6000. I have been freelancing on upwork and other freelance sites for about 2 years now but whatever I make can barely pay the bills outside the student loan. The median rate a college graduate is making here is about 500-700 a month. Just received a call from the loan institution earlier today saying that, they're going to take me to court etc. What I want to know is outside of prostitution, Is there anything I can do that can make me enough to clear this amount? Its been dogging me for years. If this drags out any further I might be going to jail.
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>>17504972
they have debtors prisons in your country?
wow
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>>17504972
could you move?
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>>17504979
Nah just regular prison, however I have been informed that prosecution is an option available to them if the funds cant be recouped from the sale of my personal assets of which I have none.
>>17504983
Nah I cant Visa restrictions to other countries and the like. Plus my family here would be forced to try and clear it even if I leave.
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Fatty here, I constantly crave food, obviously, and lack and willpower or discipline to stop, according to my shitty upbringing, and I've been considering picking up very light smoking before I'm expected to eat a large meal such as to kill the taste and calm me down when I want to stress eat, thus making me eat less, you guys think it'll actually help me lose weight and that if I do it sparsely enough I won't get addicted? I know this is probably one of the most retarded posts of the month, but I always felt I would pick up smoking anyway from my raging pyromania and my self destructive behavior so might as well. Plus I heard nicotine helps prevent Alzheimer's. But of fucking course, I'll die of lung cancer before then. But I'll die thin and near fire so I'll be happy. Pic related. Nito bone thin and blazes to the catacombs and back.
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>>17504970
Drink more water.
Like a lot more.
Like three to four times what you're currently drinking on a daily basis.
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>>17504987
I've tried that, drinking up to two gallons or so a day and I ate the same amount, I just had to get up every hour to piss. Exercise doesn't work either, simply makes me hungry and I eat double the calories I've burned. It doesn't help I currently can't control the food in the house and as such, I'm pretty much forced to fucking eat pure msg and junk food.
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smoking isn't some silver bullet that magically kills all appetite, have you seriously never seen a fat smoker?
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I love a guy, a lot, but he isn't gay. We hang out all the time (almost every day) because we are best friends, and I have lots of other people hitting on me and asking me out, but I can never feel anything for anyone but him.
How do I get over this. I know I'll never get him in that way, but I don't know what to do to get over it. It always feels like I'm just settling.
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>>17504940
Hold him down and fill up his boipussi with your love.
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stop being a faggot
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In all honesty OP, you're pretty much fucked. Date another dude and you'll forget about your friend. Or ask if he's not a fag in disguise or something similar. Life is full of settling but usually what you settle for is better than what you know you can't get and probably wouldn't be as good as you thought if you could get it. Get the biggest dude that's asked you out to fill that hole in your heart.
Thinking about joining the army. I'm currently 18 and I sorta have my life planned out. After I researched what other countries are like I really want to help and defend my nation. I would have already done it if it wasn't for two reasons. I am kinda skinny, I can work this out though, and my mother has always been very anxious/nervous. She was very protective of me growing up and I don't think she can bear it if I go for a dangerous job. Thoughts?
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you're american?
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>>17504944
Yes, I'm American
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>>17504936
Yeah.
> air force for a cushy job/life maybe get a trade
> navy for a trade
> army for a trade and do solider shit
> marines for brotherhood
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So I'm in a very odd situation. I'm in a bit of a financial jam, and someone has offered me a lot of money, but with some very serious strings attached. It basically boils down to this:
>I get $50,000, he pays the taxes on it
>He takes nude photos of me as I am now
>He tattoos me and takes more nudes
>repeat
>It ends when I have a full body sleeve of tattoos from my neck down my legs after months and months of being tattooed
>I'm not allowed to seek to remove them for at least ten years after the process is done
Yes, I am aware that this guy is a creepy fetishist, but he has proven that he has the money and I can't really afford to not consider it.
Advice? Pic extremely related.
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>$50k
That's peanuts for what he's asking.
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So what if he has the money? What incentive does he have to pay once he can blackmail you with those initial pictures which can be sent to prospective employers and family. What about the tattoos which will undoubtedly be sexual and degrading and even if not they're still visible to employers. You'd also have pictures that - even without face - virtually prove your identity now. Means even better blackmail.
Ignore him if you ever want to get a job or have money, if you're truly so desperate as to consider this and can't get a job at all look into being a sugar baby.
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bait?
are you asking anon if you should intentionally enter an abusive business arrangement?
What makes women lack empathy and consideration for others rights and feelings?
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Sub-par males
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>>17504908
So someone not being great makes em not deserve human treatment?
Wow
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>>17504903
Because you're talking to the wrong women
Anonymous
Help me reconnect with friends 2016-08-28 05:50:10 Post No.17504843
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Help me reconnect with friends 2016-08-28 05:50:10 Post No.17504843
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Help me reconnect with friends
Anonymous
2016-08-28 05:50:10
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TL;DR: about a year ago I cut contact to all my friends because I was a stupid autistic cunt who thought he had depression
I have always had problems, the fact I even had a group of friends was bewildering to me. They are great people most of the time, but as I stated in the TL;DR I just abandoned them. I feel really pathetic compared to them as they are all succeeding in life, jobs, cars and connections while I was still a little shit who couldn't hold a conversation with a stranger.
I really felt bad, and on top of that I was very stressed out working manual labour jobs (Which didn't last too long) I just cut them off as being with them was something I believe wasn't right.
I want to reconnect to them, but I really don't know how to do it. Please help me reach out to them again, I was just thinking of messaging them a detailed paragraph on why I did what I did, I feel so fucking horrible. Please tell me what to do
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What do you mean cut them out? Did you just kinda fade away or did you tell them to fuck off?
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>>17504858
At first I just ignored their messages, then I just blocked them and left it at that.
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>>17504843
cool anon i did the same thing after college. luckily my friends are all awesome and would reach out to me on the regular despite me blatantly ignoring text and calls when they were visiting my city.
just reach out to them, dont message thats cheap and awkward. give them a ring talk to them see whats up and update them on what you're doing(even if you're not doing much of anything make it sound as if you aren't pathetic) i too felt shitty post college because of the job hunt.
it all works out in the end and if theyre actually your friends they'll appreciate the phone call. its how adults talk, not text.
Anonymous
ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything 2016-08-28 05:45:40 Post No.17504827
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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything 2016-08-28 05:45:40 Post No.17504827
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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything
Anonymous
2016-08-28 05:45:40
Post No. 17504827
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GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant.
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't fucking know.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.
>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.
>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off.
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girls: ever been in a relationship where you slowly start losing your libido ?
my gf is doing it and i'm sad
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>>17504827
I claim this thread in the name of the Inquisition of Pegasus
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>>17504856
i've never been in a relationship irl
guys, what do you think about women who succeed in business
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Is it bad to have a string fetish? I fap 24/7 and it must fit certain criteria. I feel very retarded doing it like this. They must be thic or fat girls with red or black hair (it helps a lot if they have a spoopy theme). I also like rubbing and kissing their chubby stomachs.
Anyone else on this board with dumb fetishes?
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What is a string fetish?
I've got a couple of dumb ones for sure though.
You image is pretty boner inducing, too
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>>17504812
Porn is brain-damaging. Don't watch it.
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Are you a cat?
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How do I suggest my GF of almost 5 years that I want to have a threesome? I also don't know anyone who would be up to it so she'd have to provide the second partner.
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You don't, unless you want mmf.
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Do you need one? Fantasy and reality are two very separate things, and it's entirely okay to jack off to the idea of one. But is it something you want to jeopardize your relationship for and that you won't be fulfilled without?
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Start by introducing her to the friend you want to have a threesome with. Get them both fairly drunk and work from there.