Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3852. page

>>17568883
Why is this fat pig-nosed whore on so many OP pics recently? It's getting hard to remember which one was which.

>>17568883
Why are you letting her affect you this much? Give her short responses and get on with your life. Don't cut her out completely if she's a potential fuck. Tell her "no problem," and get back to doing what you were doing.

>>17568883
If this were anything else, like being stood up for dinner or whatever, then I would probably be justifiably pissed.
But since the only thing you lost was a potential quickie, I don't think you'll gain much if anything by bringing it up.
Part of me thinks you should wait for her to do it again, then just show up if/when she doesn't reply to confirm. Might be entertaining.

>>17568875
>If so
Goddammit

>>17568875
>tl;dr is the saying that you're "truly never ready to have a child" a true thing? Slowly beginning to feel that's true.
This is absofuckinglutely 100% USDA-certified truth. I had everything--house, gainful employment, nursery all set up, went to parenting classes, etc. Nothing, and I mean nothing will prepare you for B-Day. My job let me go during my maternity leave and basically pulled the rug out from under me. My baby wouldn't nurse properly and it was extremely painful to do so despite the help of BFing classes and lactation consultants. All the advice on how to get a baby to sleep; useless. Post-partum depression. Anything can happen.

Basically parenting is NOTHING like how I thought it would be. It's both better and worse. It sounds shitty, but overall I like it. It's cool to watch your kid grow a personality and learn things. Yet, this isn't a reason to be discouraged.. if family matters to you, and you feel you're at a good place in life, go for it.

I just had a baby 6 months ago and I'm your age.

Word of caution: just because you decide "ok, we'll do it!" doesn't mean it will happen. There's a decent chance you will struggle with getting pregnant. A lot of people do. It could take months, years or never happen at all. You should start seeing your OBGYN and a fertility doctor ASAP, so you and your partner can be tested for a variety of factors that will influence how fast you get pregnant.

I started trying at 25. We gave up at 31 because the chances were just so slim at a natural pregnancy, that it was no longer worth the investment. We spent 30 grand in total on IV.

We are now on an adoption list.

So start your planning now. Get your ducks in a row first.

imagine you don't know how to change a tire. you ask someone how to change a tire and they're like "sure, you get a tire iron and change the tire. pretty simple right?" when really you were hoping for some more detailed instructions so you know what you're doing and don't fuck it all up. to someone who is already knowledgeable or has strong mechanical aptitude, it's a no brainer, but you need more details on what to do and they can't understand why you need it explained because it's just natural to them.

now imagine that every time you try to figure out/get advice on how to deal with people, it goes like that. that's what being autistic feels like. it feels like other stuff too, but that's the main one I can think of right now.

>>17568939
Fucc i feel this way about mostly everything i try to learn. I need lots of details before getting something right. I had to watch youtube vids to learn how to talk to girls, although it actually fixed the problem.

How fucked am i?

>>17568864
also this
>Everyday i feel like nothing but a pair of eyeballs floating around. I feel like i dont know myself anymore. When i look in the mirror i dont see the same person i used to see. I see a nameless figure.
doesn't sound like autism at all. it sounds a lot more like some kind of depersonalization. if you had a traumatic childhood then you may have PTSD, which would explain it. if not, then severe depression and anxiety can cause it as well. however, being autistic can cause a person to feel anxious and depressed.

>>17568951
there's really no way to know. you need to get to a shrink and get a diagnosis or at least a general idea of the scope of your symptoms (I say that because some shrinks don't like to give a diagnosis right off the bat, or ever, in fact; some would rather treat you as a whole person with symptoms than try to pigeonhole you into a diagnosis). you don't have to take any meds if you don't want to. but you should really get a professional opinion so that if nothing else, you can do your own research and start working on changing the things you want to change about yourself.

if you are in the US and they give you diagnostic tests, they will probably give you the MMPI. the test is designed to find anything and everything that can possibly be wrong with you. so when you get the results back it will be a big laundry list of all your flaws, because it's a diagnostic tool, so it's only going to look for what might be wrong with you, not all the parts of you that are perfectly fine. remember that when they read you the results. I've had a couple MMPIs done and it was jarring even when I knew it was coming. make sure you have someone professional to talk to about the results.

>>17568836

Cont:

I have been experiencing the worst anxiety after this situation. I heavily regretted it immediately afterwards and wanted to date this girl really badly. I started by doing everything I can from running to going to the gym. I can barely eat, have trouble sleeping and concentrating. This issue is heavily cutting in on my ability to do schoolwork. I have this pounding feeling in my heart and I am filled with dread. I’ve drank and smoked so much, and even sparked a bit to help heal myself, but none of it is working. In my mind, my logic says to get over it and move on, because she was never looking for anything more. But my emotions are telling me that I should keep hope up and that we can have a chance to be together.

Has anyone else been through this? Is it common for a guy? What steps should I take forward: keep hope up, or move on? If I should keep hope up, what steps forward should I take? And if not, what steps can I take to move on?

>its fine if u just want to chill

seriously nigger? are you gay or something?

>>17568837
>anxiety caused ED
>anxiety caused eating disorder
>anxiety caused insomnia
>anxiety caused concentration issues
>anxiety driven substance abuse
>anxiety caused intrusive thoughts
Gee boss does this sound normal? any pattern you're seeing?

Go to the doctor/therapist, anxiety is an actual problem that will eat you alive and needs actual help. Also "sparking a bit" is not good for you or heal you, it just pushes your problems to the side for a minute don't listen to hippies.

There are a number of causes, it could simply be an anal fissure or piles, the worst case scenario is potentially colon cancer

consult your doctor immediately, not sure why you haven't sooner.

>shitting blood
>past week
This is a definite doctor situation.

If it's red, as in fresh blood, then it's probably not a big deal. It's when it's internal, and processed black that you have to worry. Still get checked out, but the chances of it being serious are probably 1%

My friend welcome to the world of women.

You are a man, you are both physically and mentally different to your female counterpart.

She will enjoy you initiating sex as it reminds her that you are a man with a dick and two balls ready to go and this will make her want to stay with you and not go sniffing around other men.

So just get back to initiating it.

Men are typically always in the position of wanting. They desire and women grant. This has kind of been the working dynamic of modern relationships. I wish I knew the magic word or deed to get laid on my terms but it's just not a reality, OP. Just keep doing you. I hardly touch my lady anymore, I am so sick of her trying to preemptively reject me any time it looks like I am making a move.

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>>17568730
>fell for the marriage meme

>>17568693

Pull it

>>17568715
Bop it

>>17568715

ha.

but for real, this is debilitating

>>17568677
Entirely meme

No fap is a placebo effect.

>>17568677
The only thing no fap helps is fighting acne. Well, in some cases having a fuckload of repressed testosterone will make you more determined to get a fucking girl, but that depends on the person.

>>17568666
what exactly do you want to know?

>>17568700
Like how can i get into that field? Good places to start for experience

>>17568666
my background
>AA in audio production/engineering
>pianst; been playing for 18 years
>I write music/sing/play
>mainly have worked in the production side of things; studio stuff, and engineering (tracking, mixing, mastering]

ask your questions.

I dont know how old you are, but if you want to be a composer, it is kind of hard, everyone wants to do that; that being said, pick up an instrument, piano or guitar are simple enough to learn and you can teach yourself using youtube videos; or take classes on the cheap at your local community college, group lessons are decent enough for starting out; in university you can study music; i'd probably do theory

i dont know much about the video game world, but ask anyway i may have the answer.

for beginner experience, i'd hit up small game/design projects online. student projects, etc

/adv/ is so sad.

as a female, i feel bad for all these guys on here. females are so fucking fickle, even to their own kind.

i wouldnt even think about her anon see someone else that wont blatantly waste your time

>>17568664
Thanks for the advice

In your opinion should I give it another week or so or just keep on looking?

>>17568668
keep on looking but don't reject her if she comes back and says she's sorry

>>17568640
>sexy

Completely subjective and useless metric. Some women think fat guys are sexy. some men think redheads are sexy. The word is meaningless.

>macho

Is this the 80s? Another dumb, useless term. What does that even mean? A buff guy? That's stupid. Buff guys can be complete tool pussies.

If you want a relationship, you have to actively pursue it. Not wait around and hope chicks catch feelings for you. You see someone you like? Ask them out. Point blank. No ten weeks later bullshit.

It's that simple to get started.

Dress fashionably (aka how the common male dresses), speak like you're not a chicken shit, don't suck peoples' asses by giving them undue praise.attention, and always be straight forward with what you want.

And get a job if you don't have one. No one wants a NEET.

>>17568640
Just "you do you," whatever that means to you. Let the honeys come to you while you live your life.

>>17568656
>(aka how the common male dresses)
Stop

everyone notices
stop trying to shoot your school

>>17568575

No shady bizniz I swear

OK maybe slightly but nothing harmful.

I'm serious though

>>17568580
>nothing harmful
this was exactly what that dude who posted "some of you are okay. don't come near tomorrow" said

Just introduce yourself and read body language, go from there. I personally hate people asking about my tattoos usually because it's the same people who just walk up and grab your arm twisting it to get a better look

>>17568553
>Maybe should I ask her about one of the tattoos? Or ask where is she from?
Noooooooooooooooooo
That's pretty much saying "I'm only interested because you have tattoos and because you're exotic"
Even if that's not what you mean, it's what she'll hear

Organise a night out with some other classmates and ask if she wants to tag along
Chances are if she doesn't speak to anyone in the class it's because she hasn't formed a social circle yet

Instead of being another guy who just asks "oooooh what does your tattoo mean? Did it hurt?" (Which has probably been said to her literally hundreds of times) or "teehee you are from somewhere that is not here c:" be the guy that acknowledges that being in a new place and not knowing anyone sucks and is making an effort to make her feel included

If you absolutely HAVE to talk about the tattoos because you have no other openers, ask who the artist was, because it says "Hey, you have good taste" instead of "Tattoos are exciting"

>>17568612
Turns out this Friday I got a University party with some people outside of my class (I don't interact much within my class either so).

Would it be alright if I walked up to her, introduced myself, maybe do a chitchat about where she's from and then tell her about the party? If she rejects then wouldn't I be fucked for the rest of the semester in regards to interacting with her?

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Bump

>>17568538
If a girl starts talking to you, she is at least somewhat attracted to you. Dont' get into your own head.
If she goes into your room, she probably at least wants to fool around.
Give it a try in all cases.

Not OP, but advice for this question would benefit him too:

What can I approach a girl in class and talk about? I'm pretty decent at transitioning to normal conversation, I would simply like to know what a good first line is. Thanks

First of all, congrats on the baby. You'll probably feel really anxious before it comes, but once your child is in the world with you, nothing feels better. Good luck on your journey, I just had a baby too.

My main advice is not to worry about money too much. It's just money. Life will always go on, and you'll still have your family. My biggest mistake was not enjoying my daughter when she was a newborn because I was constantly having anxiety attacks about medical debt. Just do the best you can.

Overall, do your best and enjoy life. It only happens once.

>Cybersecurity
If you're good, you won't need advice. If you're shit, you should go for another degree since you'll never make it.

>>17568516
Do something that will help those less fortunate than you. It'll help you in the long run.