Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 373. page

Opposites attract, but similarity lasts. If you stay with her, you're just going to grow to resent her more and more. If you have kids, your differences are going to become even more apparent and more of an issue too.

>>18652013
Hell no. You can be friends with anyone, but your spouse or SO should bring out the best in you.

>>18652033
What does that mean? From my current perspective, I agree whole heartedly.

Weve talked about the things I feel are holding me back, the aspects of my life that I would like to improve and why - shes totally on board. She likes that I have these drives and I have aspirations to be better, but when I start to actually pursue them there is a very VERY intense vibe of "No wait, you're doing something that isn't focused on ME or US, hang on a second". I do, because thats what you do in a relationship right?

Then months go by and I am upset with myself that I haven't broken out of this rut, I'm upset with her for holding me back. I'm upset with the situation because I know she has no malicious intent, but I still feel stifled. Upset that I am somehow hurting her by wanting someone, or something, more.

>>18652006
I can't stop reading your post in Michael Caines voice long enough to pay attention to the question.

>>18652006
5 minutes isnt terrible. Average sex time is like 7 minutes (citations to follow). Premature ejaculation is before entry, like you blow your load when she touches your pants, or seconds after entry.

Do you change positions? Pull out and have cool down time? As in stop fucking her and finger her or something else? Do you have positions that feel less good for you that you last longer in you can go to when youre at the edge? (for me its cowgirl. I cant come. For my wife and past gfs ill go to that.)

You dont have to plow her hard non stop for 45 minutes. Thats porn shit. Keep in mind male pornstars report having extreme difficulty maintaining erections because of the camera crews and lights and awkward scripting and noise and smells and the fact its a job.. Some lose their careers to viagara addiction.. Dont look to them for reference..

Sources:

http://www.medicaldaily.com/how-long-does-sex-last-average-time-penis-shape-381025

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2014/04/27/newser-short-sex/8281069/

http://www.ibtimes.com.au/research-finds-54-minutes-average-time-couples-have-sex-penetration-ejaculation-1511693

>>18652006

There are gels and stuff you can buy but honestly your best bet is just working on getting back up to a round 2 or 3. 5 minutes is not terribly far off from the average time most men last.

Secondly, most of these issues can be helped if you address them in the long term with your partner. Have a conversation with her and formulate a plan to maybe find some less stimulating positions, add lots of foreplay in between positions to lengthen the time you spend intimate or maybe just cumming, taking a break and going again. This is not an uncommon problem nor is it one you can't overcome. Your body is the way it is. If you can't change your physiology then all you can do is just keep working at it and find which things help.

I yell at my partner a lot.

>>18651994
Mario Kart

Start doing things you can be proud of.

Go to the gym and work out consistently. Eventually your muscles will literally pull your body upright. How can you feel ashamed when you have body of a god?

Or learn a new skill. Practice your hobby. Read an entire book.

>>18651990
Motivation is temporary, self discipline is forever. work on achieving small things each day. That way, you're practicing your self discipline. Sounds easy, but it's hard. You can do it though anon

>>18652002
I honestly feel that most of the things in my life are not small things. University, getting good grades, not making a fool of myself is very difficult. I know self discipline will be helpful but I don't know how to keep at it over and over without huge sacrifices

>>18652015
self discipline is like a muscle. You have to train it. You don't have an everlasting source of self discipilne that you can tap into one day. You have to practice it, develop and train it. Just like working out.

>>18651979
Go for a healthy run.

>>18651979
Do you lack a drive for self improvement, both physically and mentally?

Snap out of it. You need to motivate yourself to stop the addiction... Others won't do it for you

*hug*

>>18651967
You're fucked. Lick your wounds on this one as another lesson learned for mismanaging your finances

>>18651967
Should have paid your debts scum

>>18652174
Its funny how people jump to judgement so quickly when they dont know the entirety of someones misfortunes, its true I fell short and put my eggs in one basket working as a contractor for a company that was projected to develop into permanent employment... when suddenly the company was bought out by Google... as a contractor i was not offered any severance pay but still had financial obligations to my car bills, mortgage and growing family. When you are backed into a corner there are things a person needs to do to get by.. I couldnt forsee my financial future hence the bankruptcy and had to find a way to make ends meet until i found this new role.

>>18651953
Anything You want. As long as you really want it.

>>18651953
Are you talking football,baseball or chess, debate team?

Playing physical sports at that level with little prior experience is dangerous.

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>>18651964
All I really want is to tell people I play a sport

>>18651944
You need a combination of protein, carbs and fats to gain muscle and size. You also need to increase your intake of food.

Also, wash yourself after eating tuna, please.

>>18651944
Read /fit/ sticky

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>>18651944
Tuna has high levels of mercury in it. I wouldnt recommend eating more than 1 can per week.

Two questions:
How have you managed to get into university when you don't know what a diary is and how to use it?
Do you really think you're going to go far in life if you can't take responsibility for yourself and blame things on everything other than yourself?

>>18651930
You know the answer to your own question gengar.

>>18652035
I dont anon. Please be more clear.

Fuck no you should not start a two year long part time gig. Christ, it's like you want to die poor

>>18651913
P.S. I forgot to mention

THE REASON THIS IS SERIOUS: I was "recovering from something" vein/blood related, so I worry this is related

If not, is it just from laying in bed or something else? I only just noticed these things on my foot

>>18651913
P.S.S. I'm not fat but I feel pressure on my feet when I stand

>>18651913
You might die if you dont go see a doctor right now

Tldr;
How do I learn to enjoy something so I don't feel like I'm missing out?

It may help if you just go out and do those things and don't let your idea of what it might be like get in the way.

Stop over thinking and enjoy the ride of life. Spending time with friends is enjoyable itself. If you don't enjoy an activity you can't force yourself to enjoy it.

In the case of roller coasters, I find the fear to be part of the fun. The anxiety when you're in line, waiting to get on and finally get strapped in, the ride takes off and you aren't in control anymore, just along for the ride, literally. The anxiety when slowly climbing to the top, the view, the first fall and the feeling of freefalling, the win in your hair the g-forces, and finally the catharsis of conquering the ride. Its hard to boil down any one experience to a single atom of enjoyment, but I hope that can explain why I enjoy thrill rides (and others too to some extent).

>>18651884
Pursue education and start exercising.

Find a goal. Without one, you'll only spiral into further misery. What do you want to do with your life? What do you want done by the end of this year? This month? Make plans to get to where you want, take it slowly and get there.

And best of luck to you, man.

>>18651888
My grades are too low. I had a 11 average.
>>18651921
That sounds like pseudo advice I can't use practically. A goal isn't going to take away the crushing depression weighing me down everyday.

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>>18651876
There's a reason why it's called a club sandwich.

>>18651876
Do say more

>>18651876
You're going to be sorely disappointed. Very very sorely disappointed. Best of luck to you, though.

>>18651855
Ask

>>18651861
Nah. They're all in cahoots. She'd say something to them and B would just tighten her grip.

>>18651885
I would still go for it