Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3639. page

Contract with who? Are you sure it's not just a note about 2 weeks notice to the old employer? If you didn't blab about your new work to your fast food place you should be good. You might lose them as a reference for future jobs but almost no one gives a shit about fast food restaurants because everyone has been there and done that.

Just leave man, quit the job. You have every single right to quit it, you can't get black listed for that. I say you should do it.

>>17670210
It's tempting to quit right there and then but believe me you need to go for the long run, not just for the money but to prove to yourself that even though you hated that fucking job you did your time and buried it.

>>17670153

>Should I be inviting her to do stuff?

You're putting absolutely 0 effort into progressing your relationship with this girl. Stop sitting around on your ass being confused as to why things aren't going any further with her when you do nothing to push it.

You'll never know if she wants to be more than just friends if you sit around doing nothing but trying to read her signals. Ask her out you dumbfuck.

>>17670178
I've been rejected 5 times in the past two years and never have been in a relationship. This is honestly the most I've spoken with a woman in my life and I don't want to fuck it up by being rejected, again. I just don't know what I'd be happier with.

>>17670189

>I've been rejected 5 times in the past two years and never have been in a relationship

So fucking what? You want us to feel sorry for you? You've been rejected 5 times in almost 750 days and this is somehow a lot to you?

Don't ask her out = 100% chance of being rejected.

SORRY KID. Rejection is a part of life. Either suck it the fuck up or spend your life alone.

>>17670146

Tell us a bit more, please. What happened?

>>17670146
Sell yourself to apathy

>>17670150
Nothing in particular. I mean, there's this girl i like but she has a boyfriend, and even if she didn't she's just too good and i'm not really on her league. But i keep thinking and sometimes even having dreams about her, which kinda sucks.

>>17670123
25 yo virgin
I made myself from a sperg into someone you may actually mistake for a "chad" - yet I've never been laid despite having alarge number of oppurtunities. I think the reasons for that were my masturbation and weed smoking habits as - since I've stopped both I went from occasional bouts of self-hatred to it torturing me every waking minute. I also stuck to my mom during my puberty years, when normal people start to look for other girls. Only stopped talking to her every day during the past weeks.
How do I find a girl to fuck? When I didn't give a fuck, they just kinda fell into my lap - but I never did a thing. Will this just solve itself by grabbing my balls once the next opportunity comes around?
Being a horny teenager at the age of 25 is sadly a massive turn-off to most girls.

>>17670692

It sounds like the problem is not with your ability to find women but with your self-esteem. I think you may have this idea in your head that being able to bed a girl will be the final bit of validation you need to feel good about yourself but thats really not the case.

It sounds like you're afraid. Its okay to be afraid but the key to healthy relationships, or even just the ability to hook up and feel okay about it is a steady sense of self.

There was a time in my life when I finally started hooking up with girls and if I came home and I couldn't pick a girl up I felt terrible and rejected because I felt no girl wanted me. If I WAS able to pick up a girl she would get dressed the next morning and leave and I would feel terrible and rejected because I felt like a used piece of meat. I thought sex was the missing piece to my life and I realized later on that obtaining it only made me feel worse.

I think you should focus less on trying to find a girl to fuck and focus more on building your self esteem. I had great success with therapy, personally. A healthy sex life should be the symptom of a healthy personal life, not the key to it. Even if you manage to get a steady stream of sex it won't ever develop into an affectionate relationship if you hate yourself.

>>17670738
You're right. Very. But I'm in the process of removing my remaining problems right now - stopped the stuff staed in my post, started lifting and will start dancing salsa and playing rugby next week, also still improving my social skills. But aside that virginity thing? Stuff said above wasn't the only reason I ignored girls for so long. I genuinely felt happy about what I've achieved so far - more good friends than I can count on both hands, and active social life, the ability to talk to people from all walks of life, to fight and win. I traveled the world, worked ,advanced and prospered in places where I speak a single word of the language.
true, i only git rid of my vices and started changing my lifestly a few weeks ago - but I was at least content before.
Me being a virgin - that was couriously the thing that set me on my path all those years back, and is still the only thing what can make me feel below others.
It irks me more than anything else that I can't do it despite laboring for over a decade to become the man I always wanted to be - and even succeeded!

bump. pls help

Fleeting thoughts and nothing else. Who will take care of you? If you can maintain your health and go to the doctor on a yearly basis, you should be able to freely move on your own into your 70s. It all depends on your fortitude of keeping healthy.

Pass on everything you learned? Why? Why not let them figure out life? Be a happy couple that can spend time with each other and are able to afford the better things in life in the future.

>>17670111
Part of the reason life is hard is because we must, necessarily, every day, make decisions without having all of the information. You can't know with 100% that ANY decision you make is the best one. The best we can do is to work with the information we have.

It sounds to me like you have a bunch of very good reasons not to have kids. Are you going to be lonely when you're old? Probably, sometimes. Are you going to second-guess your decision? Almost certainly. Are these reasons to have kids? Fuck no.

You're doing ok, OP.

>>17670089

Where's the need for advice here?

I don't think a person can be "good" or "bad" it's just the choices they make. Morality itself is actually just a construct created by humanity.

In my opinion, it is the actions a person takes. Acting in your own self-interest is not bad, but purposefully hurting others unnecessarily is "bad". You also don't have to be a martyr to be "good"; just don't be a huge dick and help people if you are in a position to and it doesn't impact you negatively.

Commitment to being a good person, even if that means facing uncomfortable truths about yourself.

For me two people can commit the same crime, but if person A feels guilty and acts on that feeling/leaves it be despite it being uncomfortable and hurtful, and person B doesn't care or feels some guilt then immediately jumps on rationalizing how it wans't their fault/responsibility etc so the bad feelings go away, person A isn't neccessarily a bad person and person B is.

Not the full story obviously but a quick example to illustrate that I think valuing being a good person in itself (and not just as something to wave around but as a goal to work towards, invest in, bleed for) is the important part.

Though there's also a difference between a really "good person" and someone who is simply a good person in the sense that they're not a bad person, their faults are everyday human flaws and so on.

Ignore her completely. Don't look at her, don't talk about her, just pretend she isn't there.

If she tries to engage you, walk away or ignore her


If you engage her in any way you're a fucking idiot

>>17670082
you should be focused on taking that test and so should she. Don't look at her and one of you will finish first and leave.

Anyway in answer to your other questions. She expected you to do some begging instead you did the right thing and cut all contact. And you know everything you need to know about the end of the relationship. She got a crush on a new guy and acted on it and felt strongly enough about him to ditch you and any future plans you guys had. The End

>>17670101
>If you engage her in any way you're a fucking idiot

Including proposing to her.

Hey-o.

Sick burn.

Okay bye.

No, considering how long it was after that she got her period.

>>17670046
>I had unprotected sex

Nigga...

I'm not positive but pretty sure if she's head her period you're OK. Plus pregnancy symptoms don't usually show at this point.

But seriously. No fucking unprotected sex. If you want to do PIV you get a vasectomy or you wear a condom or use some other birth control.

Period.

>>17670073
I've been fucking my girlfriend bareback for 9 years and have 0 kids.

You can make everything seem like nothing by this. Imagine you had this attitude towards every aspect of your life, like "why would I want to be with this person if there are hotter/better/whatever people out there I can't be with".

It is a challenge to learn to appreciate what you have without looking at what you don't. You get enjoyment out of this, it could become a great hobby for you that makes you feel proud and brings you entertainment and new challenges at every turn, that could calm you or console you and so on. Why would any of that be diminished because you cannot do everything?
Also, protip, no one can. In today's world with so many Tigermother babies who have had top level education and intensive practice from childhood onwards, the real world class pianists have a stroke of genius that is reserved for the very very few.

>>17670029
Wow, thank you for saying that. Sometimes I forget how nihilistic I can be.

>>17670048
No problem. For the record, I used to have the same attitude. Played the cello for ten years, eight to eighteen. (I wasn't "done with it" or anything, just lost track of it due to college.) I really resented constantly noticing what I didn't do well enough in my eyes. I felt like practicing, the money towards lessons etc was a waste of efforts and kind of embarrassing as I was obviously not a great talent. It didn't help that the guy who has his lesson right after mine -was- very talented and became a local celebrity within his area now.

Anyway, looking back I don't really care because I understand this is what I thought like back then, but it's still a shame. This destructive thinking was the only thing that had a real negative impact on my abilities. And no, I'll never be a top notch player. But I also now feel that it was very immature of me to narrowly think in terms of average - above averagely talented - exceptionally talented - genius etc. A musician has his or her own voice, you put something of your personality in the way that you play, something of the way you experience the music. Just like one singer's voice can appeal to you a lot more than that of another, even though the second singing voice is technically better. So that's something else still... you still put your own way of making music out there, even if just for friends. That in itself is something beautiful.

My older brother has some pretty big temper issues, along with a fair share of arrogance and a very negative additude. Doubt he will ever end up in prison or anything like that, but I do fear that he will alienate people with the way that he acts and ultimately end up sad, angry and alone. I hope it doesn't come to that, but all I really can do is hope.

I've talked to him many times about this and he refuses to listen. As such, i've asked others about how I can help him change, and perhaps some of the best advice I have recieved on the subject is that you can't force people to change. No matter how much you care or want to help them, only they can make the changes to their life and additude and improve themselves.

It sucks, I know, I really do, but therereally isn't much you can do. I'd say be willing to support and assist them if they ever come around, but that willonly ever happen if they decide to do so.

>>17670173
My brother has so much potential but every word that comes out of his mouth is like venom and my father is having serious regrets about immigrating in this country, made so much sacrifices to be treated like shit. My brother even once said he wished my father ceased to exist. I have beaten him up a few times because I just couldn't stand his shitty attitude. We did went to a psychiatrist once but didn't help at all

>>17670188
Well I don't know if I would beat him up if I were you. If he throws a punch first, then fine, it's alright to retaliate, but i'd say simply besting him to make him stop acting up either won't work or will just make it worse.

As for everthing else in your post, i'm sorry to hear that he acts like that. It may have to do with the fact that he's 14, what with how a lot of teenagers act up and have rebelious behavoir and all that. Have you told him about how you feel? Like how you feel he is a smart individual with a whole lot of potential? Or tried to talk to him about how he makes everyone he talks poorly to (like your father) feel?

Not saying any of this stuff will work, it hasn't really worked for my brother, but it could get him thinking, which may ignite a want to change in him. Or not. As I said, you can't force him to change, it he wants to continue to act like a complete asshole to everyone, then he will, no matter how you or anyone else may feel about it. It's unfortunate yes, but it's just how it is i'm sorry to say.

>>17669943
vaporization or ingestion

>>17670004

Not at all. Weed smokers belong in jail.

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>>17670067

CL and tinder has a lot of them. Don't go for the casual encounters section like I do for sex, go for their "romantic connections" or some shit like that. Most of them are single moms whose boyfriends ditched the minute they got pregnant.

>>17670132
Hmm I did spend some time on Tinder but never saw any pregnant girls. CL is lacking too at the moment...fuck

>>17669930
>t. Ken Bone

>>17669869
You will end up cheating if this goes on. In fact some would say you're already emotionally cheating if it weren't for the fact that your boyfriend is okay with you hanging out with this friend of yours.

But that bullshit aside, you've been with your man 3 years. Tell him everything you posted here. All of it, how lonely you feel and shit.

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>>17669869
roastwhore pls go

>>17669880

you don't understand. I HAVE done that. His words are "work and school are more important and you're not my entire life. I need some alone time and I don't have time to see you as much as you want. If you don't like it break up with me"

I say i'm lonely and he says "go get some friends" and I have but it's not the same. Going to a movie with a friend isn't the same as getting love and attention from a significant other. I don't need more friendship, i need more from my boyfriend. I don't want to break up with him because i love him and he says he'll move in with me in a year but in the mean time i'm miserable.

>>17669859
top edge there m8

Kill yourself then kill her

>>17669914
Any actual answers from people older than 12?

She's a bitch playing stupid games, tell her to take a hike.

>>17669801
Sounds like she's super shy.
Meet her during the day, for coffee or something?

>>17669801
you've been ghosted, drop contact and pursue an adult
>>17669840
this is terrible advice, do not ever give people like this validation