Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3629. page

>>17673589
How old would he be now? I think you should confront him, but getting physical will only result in your incarceration.

>>17673655
Like ~40 why do you ask

>>17673685
lmao, how does a nigga get molested at ~34?

>you don't
>you super don't

>>17673533
But they're my only romantic options atm.

>>17673548
I hope you enjoy hating yourself

>>17673527
knowing that most of the world is not like 4chan

Really only two things keep me going throughout my life: My family and music (the universal language)

>>17673527
I think about how far humanity has come in solving its problems. How we've really beaten back famine, disease, widespread warfare, etc. Granted those things still happen, they touch far fewer peoples' lives than they did a hundred years ago.

Even though the world can be horrible and cruel, it has good things in it that weren't there before. And those good things were made, deliberately, by people who felt compelled to make the world a better place, for their children and fellow men alike.

I guess at some point I just realized I'd rather be one of those people than a "people suck maaaannn" cynical asshole.

>>17673519
Ask people questions, make them feel included. Just treat people like you're interested in them and their having a good time. Like, if you're with a group of people and there's a newcomer or a stranger, make sure to introduce them and keep them included in the conversation.

You're probably thinking you need to be superficially friendly where you do shit like smile a lot and have a lot of HI HOWS IT GOING NICE PANTS, but people respond much more to the aforementioned behavior. Generally speaking, it's less about what you do vs what you make other people feel comfortable doing. Being quiet can be perceived as standoffish, makes people apologize for talking so much, etc. Asking them questions about themselves like you're really listening has hte opposite effect. People will think of you as a great conversationalist when really you're just actively listening.

Put yourself in the other person's shoes. Think of how friendly people you've known have made *you* feel. I bet it's something along the lines of "interesting, comfortable, and welcome." Aside from unrepentant narcissists, most people feel uncomfortable in social situations like they're awkward and annoying. If you reassure them that they're not, they'll feel really good about themselves and credit you for it.

That's all there is to it, really.

>>17673519
>I like being kind and altruistic and don't hesitate to help

Needless ego boost, but ok, /adv/ is a pretty dreadful place sometimes, so positivity is not that bad I guess.

>emulating "friendly" people

Then don't "emulate". Be the real you. How do people react to the real you?

>>17673569
>. Be the real you. How do people react to the real you?
Not always the best advice anon. Someone who is socially awkward needs guidance and patience. Sometimes a lil social calibration is needed to mediate things (dealing with coworkers, SO family, etc.)

There's a reason she is on okcupid and there is a reason you are on okcupid.

If you think you are in her league just pop in with a "hey, remember me?" or something like that. BUT make sure that it isn't against your work's regulations to do such a thing or have a relationship with a student.

>>17673531

fuck.. I am almost positive it is. Which is fucked because its not like I am some greasy professor demanding "favors" for grades. I am just a fucking baker.

>>17673515
Make a fake okcupid account for a hot girl. Take note of all the weird old guys and pajeets who will flood you with weird messages and won't take no for an answer, threaten to kill you when you reject them or don't respond right away, etc. That's your baseline for creepy. As long as you're not like them, you're probably ok.

I don't think it's unethical for you to talk to her at all. It might not be a good idea job-wise for you to get involved with students, but you guys are both consenting adults. Just put yourself in her shoes and remember that she doesn't know you well enough to know if you're secretly dangerous or not yet. Sending a message like "ay bb lets fuk," for instance, is a bad call. But I'm guessing that's probably already obvious to you.

why don't you just try it and see how it works?

>traditional. Looking for someone to marry
being in her 20's, this sounds like an alarm. sounds like she might be prude/close minded/etc, just from the description. which is a deal breaker for me, but that's me.

>>17673513

This may be 4chan speaking, but I don't want to "ruin" her. Maybe there's someone out there looking for what she has to offer, and wants to offer, and I'm being the jackass who doesn't really care and just wants to party.

It does kinda seem like a deal breaker, but is it sensible to think that way?

>>17673453
Dude, who the fuck knows how a 20 year old is gonna turn out. I bet you're nothing like you were at 20.

Some people are religious, or have plans early on to start a family, and some of them stay like that for life but some of them swing way harder the other way after a while, when they realize the expectations they put on themselves were unrealistic/not what they wanted.

I don't think you should try to get into a serious relationship with someone whose lifestyle you don't feel is compatible with yours. Definitely don't get married or have a kid or something with the mindset that you'll "probably slow down and be more into it"

he dabbin!

>>17673447

stop limiting yourself.

you arent actualy atusitic, dont label yourself as to define the outcome of events that haven't happened yet.

>social anxiety

this is a bitch babies way of saying 'i cant deal wiht a moment of awkwardness'.

you could go out and have hte most embarassing time of your life. the next day no one remembers. no one cares. your life is exactly teh same.

so why do you feel anxiety if literally nothign that happens that night will effect you negatively?

>>17673462
Ive just never been to a club and dont know how to dance, too self conscious to try and dance

I find it funny that CS GO has some ranking system like that. Does it even mean anything? I see people talking about this shit but it makes no sense to me, like people think something you do with pub scrubs means something?

I used to play a lot of 1.6, I played in WCG, if you were good, you were good.

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>nothing else comes as close to exciting as that now

Part of growing up kid. Nothing excites me anymore

I don't know man, if you're not enjoying the stuff you're doing now as much as the game you were playing before I'd say the solution is pretty easy, just start playing again.

Do you have that kind of disposable income in the first place? You won't be going into too much debt over a shiny new car?
If yes, are there other things you might consider spending that money on? Is the car the best use of that money?

The latter, unless you already own everything you could ever want and $15k is nothing to you.

>>17673411
I won't be going into any debt over either car. With the more expensive one, I'll just lose $15,000 more of my own savings.

Not really a song, but If you like ambient music this is really soothing.

https://youtu.be/Rvq5TKwNPJA?t=1h8m47s

>>17673384
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CkyDELvJVyc

I really like this lady's stuff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJ7X6nKdav8

>>17673344
Martial Arts are a meme. The best fighters are molded from experience

>>17673344
fighting

>>17673363
Don't listen to this guy.

Depends on your objectives. Getting out of shit (Knives pulled, etc) alive by any means nessecary? Krav Maga, if you're lucky enough not to find a shitty teacher.

Just getting out of brawls well enough while not playing 'cheap'? Muay Thai, Kickboxing, Classical Boxing (No kicks tho.)

MMA could be nice but going down to the ground when there's a chance for more than one opponent is suicide

theres no silver bullet solution to your problems when youre gonna be this fucking vague

"hating yourself" and "wanting to die" arent issues. Start by identifying a problem first.

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>>17673313
i have no friends and i trust way too easily so when i do make a friend i get super depressed when they dont want to be my friend anymore

>>17673327
don't be so clingy. When you get new friends and when you leave their company stop thinking about them. Just focus on something else. Then in couple of days or in a week meet them. Don't text them 24/7 and get upset when they don't reply

Have a few drinks before you go

>>17673283

Sociable and charismatic? Are you going to a party or hosting a fundraiser dinner?

Do what you have to do to have fun. You won't enjoy yourself or make a good impression if you go in worrying about shit.

>>17673303
I think it's more an issue that I'll get judged, main reason why I turtle.

>>17673246
because you're an ugly fag

Log out and log in again

>>17673246
who here wants a slutty fucky time??? loll

>>17673232

Avoid talking to girls you are attracted to unless they start talking to you. Talk to girls you are not interested in. Once you get comfortable, then and only then are you ready to talk to girls you are interested in.

My wife was one of those girls I wasn't interested in. Interesting is way more important than pretty. If I had ended up with one of the pretty girls I initially wanted, I probably would have ended myself by now.

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>>17673253
>If I had ended up with one of the pretty girls I initially wanted, I probably would have ended myself by now.

Wow the horror of ending up with someone pretty

Fucking normies

>>17673258
Pretty, and otherwise useless as a human being.
You're the normie.