Hey Anons, the doctor is in again. Here to dish out all the relationship and sexual advice you need.
The last thread was pretty good, and here I am back again to save myself from boredom. If I didnt get to you last time Im really sorry and hopefully I can this time.
context
>meet girl at party, she's drunk as fuck
>drank too much, starts falling over so i put her in the back of my car, sit there with her and start talking
>says she has low self-esteem, wants to go out with someone to know him better, not just a one-night stand
>later on she gets worse, starts puking
>take her home
>next day she texts me thanking me for last night, etc
>go on date that same day, walk around to beach
>have nice time, she seems comfortable enough to be around me
>text a bit everyday after that day
here's my dilemma, she never initiates conversation. Whenever i start the conversation through text, she can speak openly with no problem.
Is it because of her low self-esteem (as in she is afraid of initiating), or am i being paranoid and is it because although she seemed to have a nice time, she just agreed to go on a date because she thought she owed me from the night where she got drunk?
>>17675017
I think shes definitely interested Anon. She wouldnt have confided in you, even if she were drunk otherwise.
From the feeling im getting it seems your first hypothesis is right. She nervious, shy, low self-esteem, she just needs to be coaxed out of her shell a little bit.
Just keep going how you are and just remember shes just being shy, its nothing against you.
Best of luck anon, looks like youve got a good one.
>>17675054
Thanks doc
It's my first "real" relationship with a girl, so im not sure if i was going down the right path.
Previous times i've talked to girls i liked, after a few months they just stopped replying, so i developed this nervousness for when someone doesnt reply to me (even when i know full well she might not be able to access her phone because she's sleeping, etc)
So because of my past experiences, i get paranoid and think that this girl doesn't want anything with me, and is just using me.
So I'm 22 and noticed I have started to bald. I do have genetic predisposition, but I still have a hard time accepting it.
If anyone here has had similar experience, how do you deal with it?
Get used to looking at yourself and at your balding. Look around and see all of the people in the same situation. Know you're bald because your bald forefathers had no problem getting some.
You just have to own it. Being attractive to the opposite sex has nothing to do with your hair. If someone only likes you for your hair then that person is a piece of shit.
Exactly.. I started balding around 23 or 24 too.. I got over it quick , i started shaving my head and now i actually think its the style that best suits me... Men who worry too
Much about their hair are kinda homosexual to b honest. Ive got a gf who im going to marry one day and when im out women still look at me.. So it doesnt mean shit.. Only a scumbag wouldnt like u over hair .. Shave that shit off and dont go walking around with missing patches on ur head its faggy
going job hunting with mom any advice
>>17674816
i have https://www.google.ca/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=4&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwjYprWF79vPAhWQ3oMKHQ2FCoMQFggqMAM&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.autismspeaks.org%2Fwhat-autism%2Fpdd-nos&usg=AFQjCNGCFsiLTEelT3Sdez55mg8Vq6BI3w&sig2=1MZ9xf6ZEIpRwg8cBSSSGw
Don't go with mom.
>"Going job hunting"
State location and general types of work available. State living arrangement and costs.
OK boys, I'm a ask out a girl. That's not the issue. The problem is that I've never done this before so
how do I phrase it to sound best?
what do if yes?
what do if no?
You will inevitably fuck up big Time no matter what you say, but that's normal being your First time
how well do you know her?
>>17674796
Well of course. But how should I handle it?
Walk away and I say we're still friends
Let her say we're friends (and that's giving her dominance )
Or walk away and pretend that it never happened.
Is there any reason why you wouldnt delete the person you ghosted from everything? unless its temporary (weeks- a month or 2)
Why do people do partial deletes? like blocking a number but not removing them from other social media? I mean if you arent going to reply to them there you might as well. I know logic doesn't alway apply to shit like this but still. Seems pointless to just let all the messages flow in and ignore them. Is it because they believe that someday in the future they might need their help/advice? or that they might talk to them later on? What makes them think that after being ignored they will care enough to help?
its a two way thing. You cant expect a reply whenever you want, but then ignore the other person when they need/want something.
calm the fuck down francis
>>17674795
fuck off samantha
It's a gradual thing with friends/acquaintances. First you stop texting, then you delete them from your phone and finally you remove them from Facebook once they get the hint. There's no point in getting too intense about non official non romantic relationships.
How the fuck do I ask her out
>>17674770
"Hey you wanna hang out somewhere sometime"
>>17674770
Hey femanon, it's anon. I was wondering if you would like to have a coffee or a beer with me?
>Ah cool, how about next Thursday afternoon?
>Aw, you're too busy, maybe another time
If the latter, don't bother with her again
>>17674770
hey 6/10, wanna date ?
Currently dating someone hundreds of miles away, it's so fucking hard. Has anyone done that? How did it end up? I'm getting so fed up.
Bf and I have been dating for almost 2 years now, I moved in with him for a while but moved back because I missed my family (I regret it everyday) now everythings changing and the bf is acting weird and goes out every night and stays out until like 5 am and barely keep me updated. He's never been like this before and I don't know how to react. Ugh. I just want someone to talk to but i have no fucking friends.
>Conflating multiple issues into one huge problem.
Look, LDRs are very difficult things that seldom work, often if they do, you need a clear end point. That means you need to be able to say (in whatever way shape or form) "We'll be together on x date". A lot of LDRs are just perpetually LDRs which is just heartbreaking (to be in).
>bf is acting weird
>goes out every night
>stays out until like 5 am
>barely keep me updated
It's probably best for you to put your relationship to one side and work on yourself.
>Ugh. I just want someone to talk to but i have no fucking friends.
Here's the key thing- even though you're unhappy in your relationship, you're not alone! Even though it makes you feel lonely, even though it's probably draining your mental energy and preventing you from making friends, you're still not alone.
I think, it's only going to get worse and end badly. You should put yourself first and work on your own problems/confidence/whatever.
FYI I've done two~ one was an unplanned LDR and the other was a planned LDR, both turned out rather badly. You have to be pretty mature, I'd say.
>>17674735
Thank you for replying. It's so hard because he's never been like this. He's always given me his entire heart and soul, which I've taken for granted a couple of times. He's told me he's starting to work on himself and his confidence and I guess that means leaving me behind and it shatters my fragile little heart. This is both of ours first really serious relationship but it's always felt so right for both of us. We've talked about getting married or even just moving back in together soon. I hate this insecurity I have hanging over my head. I know he's faithful when he goes out but it's the fact that he isn't giving me any attention that kills. We've always been super clingy, we'd text all the fucking time and now I feel like I have to beg him to put aside time for me.
>>17674715
I'm afraid I can only re-iterate >>17674735
I have no direct experience of an LDR but my best friend (from Scotland) maintained one with a girl he met from Florida in 2015.
They done the usual things like Skype/texting on the regular.
Though they did keep each other updated frequently, they didn't freak out if contact dissipated for a while.
There were plenty of occasions where me and my mate were "out til like 5am" and as far as I have seen, it was no big deal. But my mate's a good guy and barely bat an eyelid at other females anyway.
However, the key ingredient was that there was a plan for them to be physically together and they made it happen. They maintained the LDR for about 8 months then moved to New Zealand together and have just recently become engaged.
It can work, but you both need to be a little more proactive and practical about your endgame by the sounds of it.
I am being led on by girl of my dreams
In constant state of friendzone and yet somehow still led on by said girl
girl never wants to hang out with me. Says she does. Finds bull shit reasons to cancel last minute.
occasionally gives me a morsel of affection and hints that she feels as I do
FuCKING dates other guys
stILL FUCKIN LEADS ME ON
When I get fed up and ready to move on, she guilt-trips me and I end up feeling like I want her again.
How do I move on. I'm stuck on her and it depresses me and consumes all my thought.
>>17674669
>she guilt-trips me
how?
>How do I move on
cut contact
>>17674669
>I'm weak
>it's the girls falt.
>>17674673
She says that I am stressing her by talking about it out and that she actually cares/likes me, among other things. Except she doesn't. Makes it obvious. Still plays mind-games on my and fucks with my head. Somehow convinces me that I am in the wrong and makes me feel like a jerky piece of shite.
How do I cut contact? Just like that? Stop talking all together?
>None of my friends ever invite me to hangout
>None of my online friends ever invite me to play video games
>Trapped in my room on weekends depressed, just playing games and listening to music
>During the week, work 9-5 in a job that I hate
>Coworkers all older and don't ever invite me out to lunches/functions
Anyone else know this feel?
>>17674487
Might need to self-evaluate a bit and figure out the reasons why this is, are you a downer to be around? Are you uninteresting? Do your friends appear like they actually like you despite not inviting you places?
One thing I've learnt is it always takes one person to make the effort, so these other people in your life might be in the same boat and it takes you to initiate something to get the ball rolling. Try asking your friends to hangout, ask your coworkers if they are doing anything, or organise a work gathering on the weekend.
Unless you're very unappealing to be around it is most likely just in your head, most people want to socialise and hang out.
>>17674487
Sure man I used to know that feel. I changed myself so I no longer ever have to experience that.
Question is: Will you change yourself or stay in the same place you are now?
>>17674487
Do you invite any of your friends to hang out? Or any of your coworkers to lunch? If you don't make an effort to interact with people, they won't make any effort to interact either. Especially if they themselves aren't lonely at the moment and have no real reason to actively seek new friends.
Gonna keep this brief. Alright guys I think my life is over. Two nights ago a drunk guy got into an argument with me about politics. He was really left wing and I was trying to remain neutral, but every time I didn't agree with something he said he shouted that I was a rapist/anti semitist/racist/homophobic etc. right in my face. Finally, he asked me if I thought men could be raped and I said 'yeah of course they can' and he laughed in my face. So I smashed him around the head with a vodka bottle. I spent the rest of my time in jail and I've got assault charges. Is my life over? I feel like this is the end.
O shit ur fucked bad
good luck
>>17674464
>Is my life over?
Yes.
You're gonna spend quite a bit of time with Bubba and his friends. He will put you on the top of his dick and spin you like one of these little propeller heads for kids from the 80s until you practically screwed on his dick balls deep. Then he'll start to pound and you better pray he won't perforate an intestine.
Pro-Tip: play with his nipples while he fucks you. It may make him more emotional during the act and maybe he'll even fall in love with you.
>>17674464
Just show remorse for what you did and hopefully you don't cop too big of a punishment. Learn to control yourself, or bait him into throwing the first punch so you can retaliate in "self defence". Your life isn't over, just learn from this, people have made much worse mistakes, yours just happens to be one that comes with more obvious consequences.
So my brother begged me for $20 the other week and despite promises of tomorrow or soon he still hasn't paid me back. I tell him ok I know you buy weed everyday so bring me home $10 worth & i'll drop the debt. I received half of that in terms of weed, maybe less. Yet he has weed on hand & I've also seen him with enough money to pay me back. He's threatened to fight me if I steal the weed or money from him(I know he's too much of a bitch to really do it but i'm not gonna steal shit i want him to just give me compensation upfront.) And he's borrowed money he never paid back before, and he's also basically borderline hustled me out of weed I paid my own money for
On top of that he still asks for favors like taking my phone charger even when I need it because he always loses his. Always. And he fucked his debit card account (For attempting fucking fraud with fucking scammers) so he'll regularly come to me to borrow my card so he can borrow money from friends who'll quickpay money to my account so he can withdraw it to buy...guess what??? And he literally treats it as though I'm obligated to do it! He even drove me to the bank one time to get a new card after he lost my old one!
And god forbid I don't accept his requests he gets angry and confrontative as fuck until i give him what he wants. Yet he does me literally 0 favors.
I'm honestly sick of his shit & I know if i told him everything I wrote here he'd yell and bitch & distort the truth like he always does to make it seem like he's not in the wrong. Thing is we're both over 18(slightly) living at home & I'm not trying to fight my fucking brother in my parents house. But I literally don't know how i'm supposed to handle this in another way. I just want other people's thoughts on this situation...
Why are you afraid of him? Hes your brother and he needs his ass beat to learn a lesson. Preferably by someone he knows since if you dont do it then it might be some sketchy guy he pisses off who has a knife.
>>17674412
My relationship with my parents is on a thin line & I know if they know me & him fought over drugs (Even though i barely smoke anymore) I could hit the curb. Plus I don't want my little brother & sister to have to see that kind of thing if it came down to it, you feel me? I blocked quickpays from going through my card tonight though
fight him faggot. or rat him out as a pothead
Does this sound like a good way to start a conversation with a cute girl in one of my lectures?
We have an in-class midterm tomorrow, so I figured that either if I get there before I could possibly stand outside the class near her and ask a few questions or something. If that doesn't work, maybe after the exam/after the class we both have immediately after the midterm I figured I could ask her and her group of friends about the exam and see how they felt or some shit and try to hold a quick conversation from there or something.
Does that sound okay, or am I just going in to disappoint myself, or am I over thinking it?
She's really cute, been wanting to talk to her for a while but haven't found the courage since she's almost always in a friend group.
>>17674366
Just introduce yourself. If you see she's alone before or after class, introduce your self and ask her about the class, if she enjoys it, how she did on x assignment or test.
If you see her away from the class, walk up and say hey arn't you in x class? Then introduce yourself, make a bit of small talk and then ask her out for coffee or lunch.
You've got the hunger, now you need the balls. The balls to not worry if you make a fool of yourself. There are always more cute grills.
>>17674366
I'm laffin'
>>17674366
You're on the right track, i'd suggest not planning a time for it and just keep an eye out when the time feels right, like if she's standing alone or not in conversation with people. In the mean time you can show interest by smiling every time you pass each other or look in each others direction, will make it easier to say if you build some kind of foundation like that rather then a complete stranger walking up and talking to you.
My friend's girlfriend is hot as fuck and a very smart girl. We are VERY close, perhaps too close, and she is always telling me how she thinks her relationship won't work. We are going to a concert together with her cousin and we are getting obliterated drunk and she is going to help me pick up some hot ass bitches. My friend doesn't want to go and he's very insecure about it. I know that she likes girls too.
I think she has the same idea as me; complete debauchery. She's a total slut on the inside and I can see it easy. I can't resist, I want this so fucking bad but I know it will destroy the relationship with my friend. Should I stop this now, or keep going?
He's not really your friend.
You sound like a shitty friend; kys.
>>17674358
I've known him for 6 years and he considers me his closest friend, but ever since she got involved in our lives, there has been some tensions. She told it to me like this; all that she has his him and I.
Any tips for a sensitive goy? I have trouble lasting decently long in the sack. I can force myself to but it makes sex unenjoyable because all I can think about is prolonging my orgasm. Pls help
Look into drugs to help
That pic is spicy by the way
>>17674293
What kind of drugs? I work at a place that drug tests randomly
>>17674284
Just eat a banana
How do I become a better conversationalist?
I feel like all I say is
>Oh yeah I feel you
>I totally agree
>For real
>that's tight
>daaaamn
Like I get nervous but I try and keep my cool.
>>17674256
Start having conversations for fun.
maybe you could try having opinions about things.
>>17674264
What if you're a nihilist/absurdist/egoist