I'm someone who has struggled with depression issues for a long time. I was actually doing pretty well with it for a while. A recent relationship developed that helped center me. Now it's falling apart and I feel like I'm back to where I started.
In a lot of ways, I feel like my depression exerts its influence as a kind of cold logic. I could give you a bullet-point list of reasons that I feel sad and alone, shit in my life that makes me feel hopeless and stuck.
I feel as though I have two options if I want to survive. The first is to actually fix the problems, but most of them are either beyond my control. The remaining are things I could potentially one day work on, but do not feel in any way capable of dealing with now.
The second option is to figure out how to stop caring about these things. How do you stop caring?
>>17689132
Read some scholarly books on mindfulness in relation to depression. Kabat-zinn is a good start.
When you acknowledge a problem, acknowledge how you feel about it, and acknowledge that it's out of your control it has a tendency to sublimate from your consciousness, rather than actively trying to stop caring. Repression builds up latent stress and sets you on the downward spiral, friendo.
>>17689132
Same problems here. How old are you? I am 25 female,my problems started from very early from the house. Then my parents got divorced. My mom after two years expelled me from home. Then went to dad. Problems with my grandmother (she is crazy and interested to get rid of me, no kidding). Mostly living to my bf's house. Then got a car,after 1 year had a big car accident because of a technical problem of the car.the car destroyed. I am out of money,out of car,out of job
>>17689132
Read "Feeling Good - The New Mood Therapy" by David Burns. Stupid title, but it really fits with what you write.
How do you accept the fact that other people will never truly care about you?
I have a group of friends from my work that I've had for about a year now; for the most part, we have great times together and I enjoy their company. But as of late, they make no effort to ever reach out to me for anything. I try to initiate plans to hang out or do stuff and they'll either give me some line or blow me off entirely. And it goes without saying they never initiate plans with me, and I know they still spend time together all the time.
These are some of the first genuine friends I've had in my life (I'm 20) and I've always gone above and beyond to be in their lives and be the most selfless friend I can possibly be, and nobody ever gives enough of a shit to do the same for me. I asked another friend and she said I struggle because I try too hard. She's probably right but it just feels retarded. In order to be a good friend you have to do it effortlessly and be too cool? Am I just crazy?
This pretty much applies to me in romance as well.
Pic unrelated.
>>17689126
>How do you accept the fact that other people will never truly care about you?
With that attitude, it's no wonder people don't feel like hanging out.
You met people that you didn't get along with. Wow, join the club. That's life.
Keep the people that you connect with around, and keep looking for more. That's what we all do.
I was in this situation, it hurts for sure.
I found that people care more about you when you aren't an ass but aren't some nice guy either.
>>17689147
Not OP.
What's a "nice guy" to you?
I'm sick, started last night. I can't eat anything as ill feel nauseous and probably throw up. No stuffed or runny nose, bad cough, I have a headache and I have felt fatigued. What is it? Please.
Possible food poisoning? I've had it a couple times and both times were different. But usually you can feel pretty drained because your body has some bad shit in it. Not a doctor though. I'd give it a couple days and go in if it gets worse. Also if you notice any blood anywhere, that's a good sign to go to the ER immediately.
Do you have any other symptoms? How long has this been happening? I'm not a doctor but these answers could help
I've had it since yesterday, I have a fever and chills. I feel uncomfortable and I have trouble sleeping. I feel sick if I stand. Up for too long . Thanks guys. I hate the cough and lack of food.
I'm 18, last grade in high school. Today a retard tried to fight me. I just felt very scared. He humilliated me. I want to be able to hit him. What tips should I know? He could took me by my neck and hair really fast, couldn't even think about defending myself.
He's a bullier, and I want revenge.
Pic NOT related.
>>17689088
revenge is stupid and not worth it.
>>17689089
So you want me to look like a coward and a pussy in front of everybody? The greatest people in history weren't cowards.
Fighting generally accomplishes nothing and is generally frowned upon.
However, if something is getting ready to start, strike first, hard, and fast. The idea is you get the better of him before he realizes what is going on.
Just think, after school is over, you probably won't see most of the people you do now.
Now usually when we have these threads its mostly answered with "shes having an affair" or "your fugly".
They might well be the case I dont know, but her mother (whom she was very close to) passed away after a short illness about two months ago, so shes still technically in mourning. Obviously I understand when something like that happens you have to be understanding and aware of the situation etc etc. Of course I sympathize knowing her mother myself. I did my best to be supportive in the wake of things - being extremely patient, not letting arguments happen, making her dinners, and giving her whatever amount of space i felt was right and just being there in general and trying to keep stress levels down.
The last time we had sex was about a month before her mother was admitted into hospital (so about 3 months ago). I never brought up sex or anything related since (even though it was on my mind all the time), but its been two months since her mom died and we're pretty much back to our normal lives (or as normal as it can be now).
Tonight I tried to bring it up in a casual conversation and she said she wasnt in the mood, to which I replied I wasnt in the mood to do her shared activity which made her flip fucking out.
She NEVER initiated sex in the first place in our relationship, which always made me feel bad enough, but now I cant even do it. How long am I suppose to wait - if at all?
I dont get it? I dont get what the big fucking deal about it is.
Whats a guy suppose to do these days? I CANNOT leave her now, two months after her mom croaked it, with xmas coming up and an important family event in January shes been planning, but I dont want to be a goddamned cuck and live a life where my girlfriend wont have sex with me.
Im fearful she wont want to come around.
Any genuine advice is appreciated as usual. Im at my wits end. Im sick of fapping every fucking night, but whats worse is that its leaving me with a sense Im not good enough.
>inb4 TL:DR
>>17689085
How old are you both?
Do you live together in the same house?
You shouldn't talk about sex, you should try to relax her,be romantic, make cuddles and hopefully one thing will bring the other and you will have sex
>>17689094
And how long have you being together?
Braking up is not the solution,especially now that she needs you
>>17689099
Breaking**
I'm not sure what to do about this situation. There's a new student who's transferred into my (fairly small) senior class in high school, and said student is, at least biologically speaking, a girl. I'll use the placeholder name "Q". Anyway, Q prefers the short form of the name legally belonging thereto. One day, toward the end of the day, I ask:
>Hey, Q, just out of curiosity, why do you prefer the short form of your name?
And Q says:
>'Cause it's gender-neutral.
And I go with that for the time being. But the next day I go up to Q and ask:
>Hey, you know yesterday, when you said you prefer the short form of "Q" because it's gender-neutral?
>Yeah...
>Well, I was just sort of wondering, y'know, why a gender neutral form?
>Well, I don't being called by the feminine form, and I've pretty much given up on getting people to address me by the masculine form.
And I say
>Wait, so does that mean you'd prefer to be addressed by the masculine form?
>Yeah, but everyone seems to get upset or offended at the idea.
>You know, Teacher Such-and-such is very tolerant, as is the administration here in general; you really ought to tell him.
>Nah, it's fine.
Later when I said
>You seriously should talk to Mr. Such-and-such about, y'know...
>Oh, forget about it.
I feel like I ought to do something to help him, because I know that being constantly misgendered can't be pleasant, but I really have no clue what to do. I should note that he seems to be kind of out of it in general, doing things like not participating or only barely participating in gym class. I'm also quite confident in my assessment of Mr. Such-and-such as being tolerant, such as that I think he would feel sorry for misgendering Q if he knew he was doing it.
You could mention it to the teacher but Q might see it as interfering. Q probably has his hands full figuring himself out. Probably the most you can do is try to be a friend to him.
>>17689075
>I feel like I ought to do something to help him,
Don't. Don't butt in. It's his problem, and he is dealing with it in his own way. When he is ready, he'll talk it out and demand to be treated as he really wants.
Right now, let him work it by himself.
>>17689075
Offer to talk to Mr. Such-and-such after you get to know the guy/girl better but don't do shit on your own. It's cool that you want to help but butting in if it's not asked would be overstepping the boundaries.
Why does romantic, physical intimacy make me feel so uncomfortable?
I feel obligated to be certain levels of touchy at the appropriate stages, but sex isn't really what I want out of a relationship.
Most women need, as far as I know, physical affection more often than I'll be willing to offer.
I was never molested
hetero man
>>17689065
What's your relationship with your parents like ?
Cause if it's not good with either one of them , you've got a 90% chance of intimacy issues (that show differently depending on the person, gender , and the gender of the parent ).
>>17689065
Relationships are compromises. About a lot of stuff. This one seems to be one you have to work on more than most. That's fine, we all have our own crap.
You'll have to find women willing to go to a level both of you are comfortable with. I don't know how hard or easy it will be.
>>17689065
How old are you?
Were you always like that?
>inb4 stalker
There was this person I met on a plane not too long ago out of Atlanta. After a few hours of conversation on the ride to where ever we were going she and I agreed to meet up some time in the future and she gave me her phone number, but I was retarded and accidentally didn't correctly save it. All I remember is her name, and what she's doing for uni. We're from the same area but this place is so God-damn big something so Facebook searching hasn't proven useful.
How do I find someone given not that much information?
>>17689043
You sure you incorrectly recorded the number? She might have given you a false one...
>>17689056
That's what I thought too at first.
I have a contact in my phone with the same name - Alison (or Allison? I forget the spelling) - but when I went to go save it I guess I just didn't and it kept the number I have now.
When I went to go call I found out I was calling my friend instead of her and I felt like a giant retard. There's no way the two would have known each other.
>>17689062
Sorry mate, but it was just a conversation on the plane. I'm sure she'll find the effort more creepy than sweet. Let it go.
How do I stop cheating on my fiancé?
I want to be faithful, really I do, but making love to new people is just too thrilling and I love the intimacy too much.
Please help.
Do you really love your fiance? It might explain why you're cheating. And if you really do, then just think about the future you and her have together. Are you really willing to risk all of that for a few one night stands? And think about how you would really feel if you found out she cheated on you?
Agree to an open relationship. You keep going around, but it's not cheating. What my great-grandparents did and it kept them together.
>>17689036
Never had a fiancé so idk
The middle pic got the face looking better, doesnt it? Would gross painting the junk back there make it suit for facebook profile pic?
Just use the one on the right. How many threads are you going to make about this? It's not that big of a deal, especially when there's barely any differences in most your pictures.
The middle shot has the DSLs. They're all good pictures, though.
>The middle pic got the face looking better, doesnt it?
yes because it's in natural (outdoor) light
>Would gross painting the junk back there make it suit for facebook profile pic?
what? you can have stuff in the background of your prof pic dude, there's no rules. If anything an interesting background makes you look like less of an autist than a plain wall
I've been a picky eater all my life, how can I learn to eat vegetables?
>>17688972
Thats called "being a fat slob" not a picky eater. A picky eater doesn't eat very specific things like olives or cheese, not just entire groups of food because they are not over saturated with fat, salt and sugar.
>>17688972
Start raw and work your way up from there.
>>17688993
Cool
I want a fresh start in life and at this point I think it would mean to move to the capital of California where nobody would know who I am. I am not running away from legal trouble or family troubles. I just want somewhere to start all over and do things right after years of being a stoner. I have my car paid off and would move in with an aunt. She can also offer me a job at Carl's Jr where she is a manager. Assuming I have to pay 400 for rent and utilities. How doable would this be? At the moment I moved back in with my dad because I lost my job and nobody seems to reply to me for the job applications I submitted. Is there anybody out there who has moved out? What were the common troubles/hardships you encountered?
Pic unrelated
>>17688859
You should totally move. You have a place to stay, $400 is easy to make in a month. You'll probably get free food at the Carl's Jr. Fast food is actually a really good place to learn basic job skills and working as a team.
You don't really become an adult until you move away from home.
>>17688859
>common troubles/hardships
Loneliness is the biggest one. You don't know anybody and have a group of friends.
But this can also be one of the biggest advantages. Here is a chance to totally change the type of people you hang out with if you want to. You were a stoner before, now you can get friends that do cool stuff. It'll take some work, but no big deal.
>>17688868
Thank you so much for the support. I am hoping to get my life together. I want to do something with my life. I am enrolled in a community college. I have finished my general ed so if all goes well I would be able to go through with everything. I am just scared of not having someone to rely on like I do now. It's just emberrasing that I live with my dad.
> no good women left
> impossible to find gainful employment
> completely corrupt leaders
> everything taken over by minorities
> woman is about to become leader of the free world
My feeling is...let them fucking have it. Turn it into a big expensive, corrupt feminazi and nigger wonderland.
The world isn't for me anymore and I don't feel like I'm a part of it. Just biding my time doing shit I enjoy til I'm dead.
Am I alone in this?
>>17688828
>Am I alone in this?
Nah m8, there's a few more idiots like yourself. I think some of them gather over at /pol/.
>>17688828
>> no good women left
Wrong
>> impossible to find gainful employment
Wrong
>> completely corrupt leaders
Right for the most part - do something about it.
>> everything taken over by minorities
Nope
>> woman is about to become leader of the free world
You can thank the people that nominated Donald Trump for that one.
>>17688828
>no good women left
Sort of, you're unlikely to find a women with a low partner count, and relationships no longer last these days.
>impossible to find gainful employment
Yeah, it's much more difficult than it used to be. Lower wages, competing with foreigners, higher expectations from employers.
>completely corrupt leaders
I don't think they're all corrupt, but they all seem to believe in some form of globalism which makes me question whether they actually care about their nation.
>everything taken over by minorities
It's getting worse and worse, I'll agree.
>woman is about to become leader of the free world
Her being a woman doesn't matter, but she's a hollow cunt that's corrupt to the core and wants nothing but power.
If you're a white male things are definitely getting worse, I can't blame you for checking out of society. I feel the same sometimes. I go to work, pay my taxes, try to help others when I can, but it's all for nothing and I find myself caring less and less. It's obvious they don't give a fuck about us and just use us.
I hate my life so very much and I want to end it
What are some things I should do to hit the final nail in the coffin and encourage myself to end it
Thinks to do before I kms?
Growing old is apparently an interesting experience. I'd recommend you stick around to try it.
>>17688795
No thanks I'd rather not live to die alone on the streets
>>17688785
Go out at night and rape the first hot chick you see.
My vagina is really tight, my boyfriend can't even get in when I'm fully aroused. Does anyone know ways to loosen it up?
>>17688716
Do you know any black guy?
>>17688716
Try fisting.
>>17688716
Feminine penises are not vaginas