I always wanted to do graphic design. It was my main interest for so long and I would be glad to be a pro in it.
But in last few weeks I discovered that I have natural skills in engineering. Should I stay in graphic design or should I leave it?
>>17716140
What do you enjoy doing more? How much do you care about money?
Basically, if you don't hate engineering and want to make a good buck, roll with it. If you love graphic design and don't care about the monetary side too much, go with it.
Either way you will succeed Op :)
If you have the guts, just flip a coin!
>>17716140
Do you think going blind in your right eye would hinder creativity.
My girlfriend owns a house that her Dad bought her who we both live in.
While there's no written tenancy agreement, I pay 50% of the mortgage and bills.
She has a couple of mental health problems which causes her to lash out at me at times. Now I've told her I'm going to break up with her and I'll be out when the next lot of bills are due (2 weeks).
But now she's saying she wants me gone and out the house tonight, which can't happen because I don't have anywhere to go and I know I won't get any stuff back that I leave at hers. She has said she'll call the police if I'm not gone by the time she's home in a few hours.
She seems to think she can do this, because it's her house and because there's no written tenancy agreement I have no rights. I'm pretty confident otherwise, that we have an enforcable unwritten bilateral contract, and because I am paying her money I have a right to be here and if she wishes to revoke my tenancy she needs to give reasonable notice.
I've already trapped her into admitting that I've never been violent or threatening towards her and I've recorded it, so she can't pull that one on me.
I don't want to give her any hassle, I just want nothing to do with her, but I need time to make arrangements before I leave.
If, when she does get home, the police do get called. Where do I stand?
>>17716126
How long have you lived there
You probably have some squatter rights
>>17716145
About 5 months.
It could be different between states but generally without a written lease you have to be given a 30 day notice she wants you out.
If you receive mail there it helps with the police in proving you live there im told
I'm a 21 y/o autistic female (like genuinely autistic, not ~lel-u-autistic-fuck autistic) and I've been dating a 22M normie
He's the absolute sweetest, has done nothing to make me doubt his affection towards me, but I still can't help but get worried that I'M too... much? I worry that I am too much and that he will nope the fuck out because of this. So this worry in my head gets louder if he hasn't texted me on a morning for a while, or if I wave at him at work and he doesn't look absolutely overjoyed to see me (I know, I sound horribly self-centred).
I KNOW that these are just normal things, he doesn't text on a morning sometimes because that's not a necessary thing, because people forget, because he might want me to text him morning! He doesn't look 100% overjoyed and thrilled when I wave at him at work because he's at work and concentrating. I know there are rational explanations, but knowing them is different from taking them on board.
I don't let on any of this, I have a cool, calm, collected outer shell, and these worries are never with me when I'm actually WITH him in person.
TL;DR How do I stop being such an insecure girlfriend?
>boo hoo I'm a girl with a nice boyfriend woe is me
>>17716111
yeah and I'm trying not to fuck it up :(
>autistic women get normies
>autistic men get no one
No hope.
Anyways op, I feel you on the autism part. It is real rough dealing with people that don't have it. What were they like before you started dating him? Can you think of any other problems? I know it's cliche, but telling him in person how you feel about this stuff will be the cure
i just turned 18 2 weeks ago.
i go to northwestern university outside of chicago
im taking a 300 level math, an intermediate french, a basic econ course, and a writing seminar
i feel insanely lost and apathetic
all i want to do is sit in my dorm and watch youtube videos and not do anything
in high school i felt such ambition and drive, enough to get me to this university, but now i'm realizing that i have no clue what i really want.
im scared that if i dont change something soon im going to end up what im so afraid of - someone working 9-5 in a shitty office job to come home and cook shitty food and watch cable tv in bed until the next day.
i feel like my soul has been taken away since coming here and i cant figure out why.
how can i get back to a place in my head without this apathetic misery weighing me down?
heres what im thinking
-i dont have a steady sleep schedule anymore
-im not exercising anymore
-i only eat sandwiches and rice since coming here since thats pretty much all thats served
-im not getting laid anymore while i was regularly in hs
-i dont talk to anybody since coming here
help me craft a plan to get my shit back together so that i can work towards figuring out something i want to do that can save me from 9-5 with an ugly wife.
im thinking
-fix exercise, sleep schedule, dietary habits is probably first priority
but i feel lost after that
tldr:
i feel apathetic since coming to uni, even though it is a competitive and prestigious place.
i dont know what im doing with my life and want help figuring out how to live.
I kinda know that feel but after I graduated university. Just been stuck teaching ESL in Korea and banging kqts but my work is so easy and boring
>>17716104
You've answered yourself. Fix your lifestyle issues and you will most likely start to feel better. Next step to take is to seek out a uni advicer or something, all universities have professionals whose only job is to give career/study advice to struggling students. You didn't mention how long you've studied, but from your age I'm gonna assume not that long. Everyone is lost at the beginning. Uni doesn't really match anyone's expectations and finding your groove might take a bit of work. Furthermore, most of the courses in the beginning are bullshit basics and you won't find actually worthwhile and inspiring things until later on. High education doesn't really offer ready made jobs or answers, the things you learn can only offer you some insight into what you might enjoy and what might interest you. Your actual career and interests you have to figure out yourself. Give yourself time to do that, don't expect a miracle over night.
Personally I did my BA degree and didn't give a fuck about what I was doing, but in my last year when writing my thesis I suddenly found some sense in what I did. Now I'm doing my master's and I feel actually motivated and I have a decent internship lined up. Basically, uni is bullshit until you accidentally stumble across something you enjoy, I've come to believe the same is true for a possible future career. If you keep looking, something will turn up.
>>17716106
Tell me about your uni experience?
And how you decided to do esl?
>>17716118
This really helps. Thank you.
How am I supposed to find something I really enjoy?
How did you manage other aspects of your life while going through school? EG work, family, friends, sex?
And yeah this is my first quarter here.
I've been thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend because from the very start of our relationship he was really quiet and it was usually me doing all of the talking (im very extroverted and heavily enjoy being social and talking to anyone i can). I though he would come out of his shell, at least when he's around me, but after such a long time, he's still quiet. I've asked him several times about it, and he said that he's just like that. His idea of a relationship is being quiet and lovey-dovey with each other without doing much (doing anything people would normally consider fun: travelling, doing stuff together like hiking, going out with friends etc). He is really good as a person, but i was just so bored when we just chilled with each other or would go out. Is having nothing to talk about a good enough reason to break up with someone who's a really nice person?
>>17716079
>im very extroverted and heavily enjoy being social and talking to anyone i can
heh
He sounds like me
I don't talk much because I find people so breathtakingly stupid and annoying
>>17716079
>traveling
>I like having my boyfriend pay for my fieldtrips
>His idea of a relationship is being quiet and lovey-dovey with each other without doing much
Literally nothing wrong with this.
>he's so boring
Why is it him? People who are introverts aren't boring. It just means that they "click" with different people(other introverts). Just like you, evidently, have an easier time interacting with other extroverts.
So don't be so quick to call him boring, if you are just as boring(to him) yourself.
The blame doesn't fall on anyone.
If you don't think it's going to work, then call it off.
But I think maybe you could suggest doing more of the things that you want to do, and in return spend an equal amount of time doing the things he wants to do.
See what he says.
>>17716079
Nice guys finish last, drop the beta bitch
Been with my first girlfriend for almost six months now. We both started out as virgins. Sex has been great but very standard so far, we've only ever done missionary. We wanted to try more positions, but we just can't figure out how to put the DICK IN the PUSSY. Like in doggy, I feel like how to put it in. I can't figure out how to lower my dick enough to put it in when her legs are over my shoulder. Is my dick just too small (5 in.)? I feel like we need a sex coach. Any advice? Pic unrelate.
> Like in doggy
>lower my dick enough to put it in when her legs are over my shoulder.
>>17716065
book a hooker together
make sure she has good ratings
My ex bf had just over 5 inch and we did find that some positions didn't work so well but don't give up trying. Watch some porn vids to see how they are angled.
How submissive is the average girl in a relationship?
I don't mean sexually.
Not really submissive. More like demaning to the point where it gets on your nerves.
>>17716024
I'm pretty submissive when it comes to typical, daily relationship things.
Even though both my bf and I work 40+ hours a week, I still make him dinner, or if he needs help folding his laundry, I will do it. If his clothes need to be fixed, I will sew it for him. If he is sick, I take care of him.
In petty disagreements, I usually fold or compromise first. But those are over really petty things. Bigger things I always get my point across and make sure he hears me.
Overall, I am definitely the submissive one in the relationship. It's not like I feel like a slave. I enjoy doing these things for my bf because I feel like he deserves it. In return, he is my emotional rock, he pays for most of our dates, he is always affectionate with me and expresses his gratitude for me, etc. And I know he does those things for me because I deserve it.
>>17716041
Your problem is you're not a proper feminist.
How many of you guys/girls have a negative partner and on the end it drives you away. I felt guilty for leaving and I miss them. But FUCK them for making my life hell. It was impossible to stay. Fuck.my fucking life. Sick of this person consuming my thoughts. How the fuck do I move on?
>>17716023
>posts platitude on literal sunset background
this brings out a lot of negativity in me
>>17716023
I've had a few of those.
A support system generally helped me through break ups like this. Friends, family, etc.
My ex was so controlling, insulted me for the last several months of our relationship, cheated on me.
Then when I broke up with him at the end of it all, I constantly felt the urge to come crawling back. I don't know why. It was like an addiction. Not only did he constantly guilt me, he kept sending me messages implying he would destroy my reputation. And did partially. For a while, I felt like getting back together would make everything normal again.
But if I did that, I'd probably never see normal again. Time and having friends/family to support and distract me were the best thing that happened to me.
After being single for a long time, and just facing what I did wrong and what he did wrong in that relationship, helped me stop the cycle of choosing and tolerating abusive people in my life.
Whenever someone mentions my ex, it's literally no skin off my bones. Upon the time of our break up, I'd never imagine feeling like I got past him. And yet, I did.
>>17716023
I'm confused, if you really know it was for the best and your life was hell, why do you miss them? You should have comfort in the fact that your life is much better now.
I don't want to be alone this night, how to make friends?
H-Help
>>17716006
well let's start with easy steps, make some online friends. Go download Discord, and join random Discord servers (look for servers with hobbies your interested in, art/movies/games/programming) and just join them. Start with just chatting along/joking around, maybe even get confident enough and join them in the voice channels. (1/2)
>>17716006
After improving the basic set of skills and getting to know how people react/response to you. You could join local clubs or communities. If your at highschool or college this should be pretty easy, just join something easy. I'm a hs senior and joined the trivia club and reflection club. Lot's of people there willing to get to know each other. Also start using social media and stick to one you really like. For example I really enjoyed snapchat so when I meet people at clubs or such and we're having a blast, I'd go "Oh I haven't add snapchat, let me add you right now," and then since your having so much fun the other person would most likely agree. Then you can view people stories and get to know who they are to better spend time/talk to then. Maybe others will be interested in your own story and ask you question. The more talking/conversation, the more likely the friendship will the form.
(2/2)
Seriously she's acting like I cheated on her or something. Backstory;
>I was her first love, first kiss and first everything else. Before me she only had little 1-2 week relationships, I was her best and longest (6 months).
>We were very close, I'm reassured in knowing we had a great connection, made many memories together and I treated her like a princess and always done cute things for her.
>At times she'd have very low moments. Like she's either feeling very high or very low, there is no in-between, and during the low moments she was quite hard to handle.
>Because of that, we broke up a few times but always got back together straight away. At one point she even kissed another guy, cried and admitted it to me, and write me a 3 page letter of how stupid and sorry she is, and how much she loves me.
>We get back together and I forgive her, things go back to being good.
>2 months later (present day) she just breaks up with me out of nowhere (there is definitely no other guy).
This happened 2 weeks ago. Over the next 2 days, I tried to find out the reason but she just gave vague responses. I told her okay but I'm going to miss you, she said the same. A week later I seen her, told her I still have feelings for her but she pretended she was dating someone. Another week later we argued because she is now actually in a relationship already, she's being so mean and angry at me, telling me she doesn't love me anymore, she don't care, telling me to get over her, telling me to fuck off, and blocked me.
What the hell man? How does a girl, who was so in love with me, the one who gave her everything, turn so cold? Does she feel like she's not good enough for me? Is she scared to get close to me? All I know is, her friend told me she didn't like how me and her were on and off, but that's because of her, being bipolar or whatever, being with someone else ain't going to fix that, at least I never gave up on her where most other guys would run away.
>>17715977
You both sound really young, she sounds immature, and seems like she has a lot of issues probably best dealt with outside of a relationship. You should be thankful she is gone, that sounded like a nightmare.
She probably acted like that at the end because it's easier on you if you think she is a bitch, she probably still cares about you but who knows why she doesn't want to be together anymore. If she's already dating someone a couple weeks outside of her breaking up with you then she probably was either talking to him already or planned to start shortly after breaking up.
Take the experience of being a good boyfriend and helping someone when they are bipolar/going through shit and move on to the next girl, she will likely appreciate your efforts much much more then this one.
>>17715977
Broke up and got back together a couple times, kissed another guy, 6 month relationship.
It doesn't even matter why or how things happened. They did. Now your only response should be moving on.
>>17715977
Just be thankful it didn't last longer than 6 months, your life is valuable, don't want to be wasting it on crazy bitches like that.
Honestly at the 6 month mark with a normal person that you're compatible with you should still be in the honeymoon phase, loving each other and everything, not breaking up every few weeks.
How to breakup with someone you love because she is a liar and don't respect you?
Ignore her
Let her approach you
Say you enjoyed your time with her
Happy you got to know her
But you're just two different people
And leave
Just tell her how you feel, senpai.
relationships aren't complicated. What's complicated is all the political games people play to manipulate their relationship like it was some fucking fantasy novel they're writing and everyone is just a character in their half-ass story.
>>17715949
>>17715954
Maybe I expressed myself badly, I don't want to know the procedure to do the breakup, but how to have the balls for it, I love her so much...
I have a boyfriend but I don't want to be with him anymore, but I don't know how to say it to him. Today I'm going to his house. What do I do?
You go to his house and explain to him why you don't want to be with him anymore. You do this with consideration and make sure he truly understands. Most people would not want to be with people who don't want them. Ego/self-worth hit, but he'll get over it. Do it right.
>>17715922
IDK girl I feel like my GF intellectually betrayed me and I really feel like hiring a tranny hooker to fuck me in the ass right now while she's away (not even kidding).
I guess the best way is to tell him that it's time to draw the line and split before it gets worse, and that you'll help him find a replacement if he would like that.
ok... I'll try to do it right. any advice? He's my first boyfriend
Didn't think this deserved its own thread. Didn't know where to post this. A co-worker of mine that I've known for about 7 months has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. I've never hung out with this person. He's also a pretty cool person. A lot of co-workers that I that talk to are going to support him by visiting him at the hospital. I only thought about going because the girl that I like is going as well. I think it's going seem fake of me to go just for that reason. I shouldn't go then right?
>>17715914
Whoops, messed up on the first two sentences.
Of course you shouldn't go.What are you thinking? Stage 4 cancer is a short-term death sentence. It means it's already too late and you're dying of metastatic cancer.
That person doesn't want to be around fucking strangers. He probably doesn't even want to see ANY of the people coming out of the sheer politics of it like you are considering.
>>17715963
this...
just ask her out retard
I've got a second interview at memorial sloan kettering on Wednesday and im word im going to be given a urinalysis. Im a pretty skinny guy and my metabolism is quite fast but I smoked on Tuesday... any success stories? Is it possible to pass a thc pee test within a weeks? I would smoke about .5- gram a day max
>>17715905
Bump
Why don't you get some fake piss at your local headshop and just do that?
Or drink a lot of water and pray, lol. You're supposed to wait at least 1-4 weeks depending on use, to be sure.
>>17715951
Its at a hospital lab so im afraid they will be able to tell that it is fake if I use it. Ive been drinking a ton of water and im going to self test the day before.
I'm the type of guy who values logic. I like people who understand the merits of an argument.
ITT arguments can be incredibly productive so let's just be adults and figure out where we're both coming from contextually, so we can better understand each other's perspectives and take it on from there.
What I don't like is when people shut down, aren't listening, get overwhelmed by emotions and use the argument as a vehicle for emotional discharges. This is when I fall into the rabbit hole, get aggressively sarcastic and deliberately hurt people which has brought on some accusations of arrogance.
I don't like living in a social echo-chamber and I value being exposed to people that have other views, even though I'm sometimes flat out opposed to them and I think they're harmful. So tell me, how do I avoid spazzing out when I find people to be unreasonable? I need tools.
bamp
>>17715898
>how do I avoid spazzing out when I find people to be unreasonable
Frankly, it sound like you're quite unreasonable yourself. Maybe stop for a while, take a few calm breaths and realise that you're losing your shit over something that doesn't matter all that much really.
>>17715898
Emotions are much more relevant for humans than logic ... which is fucking logical, given how we're semi rational beings at best. So for one, just because your arguments are more logical, doesn't mean that they are 'right".
Once you understood it, it should be logical that you can't change their opinions with logic, so don't even bother. Oh and many people who argue don't really care about understanding shit, so again, knowing that, you should be prepared that you won't get anywhere with some people and just ... let it go.
If somebody is being annoyingly unreasonable just switch the topic and deescalate with some joke.