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Whenever I meet a woman I immediately begin fantasizing about dating and falling in love with her. I'm 28 and it hasn't stopped. It's been this way since I was a kid.
Most recently I've "fallen" for a friend's apartmentmate. She's cute, has similar taste in literature, is an old school feminist like myself, not a SJW tumblr idiot, but we've only hung out a few times. It feels strained because I don't want to approach her because if it didn't work out it would be awkward between myself and my other friends that live in the apartment.
On top of that I may bump into another woman in a few days and "fall in love" with her too.
I want to be a strict monogamist, but this mental problem kills my chances.
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>>17733260
Be a man. Start having more sex, pay prostitutes if needed. That way u will learn to have sex without falling in love. From there, its easy peezy
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>>17733277
I don't want to be a stereotypical man. I want to control my emotions and find a woman I'm compatible with then settle down.
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>>17733277
I'll probably fall in love with them too. My brain doesn't listen to reason.
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I'm happily engaged but don't feel like the physical aspect of the relationship is cutting it. As a shallow piece of shit human being I want to take advantage of male-dominant double standards before they vanish in today's social climate. I'm not bad looking and have the mystery of being half Asian so I think I could swing successfully for a bit.
Obviously this would have to be on the DL so I need to be able to cover my tracks really, really well. I work far enough away in a decent sized town where overnights come every now and again. Anyone have experience with this? Where do I start? Is this a good idea to begin with?
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Why don't you try fucking your fiancée faggot?
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>>17733253
Read the first sentence?
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>>17733244
Why are you with someone you have to cheat on to be happy? Clearly you're not happily engaged. Your partner will find out eventually and it's going to crush them, more so than being broken up with, and that's on you. Feel free to be a shallow piece of shit human, just don't fuck people over in the process of doing it.
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Is there a way to get more motivated to do things? I get bored with things really fucking easily and its starting to get on my nerves. I want to be able to feel accomplished and stop being such a lazy fuck.
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>>17733213
Less weed, more antidepressants and get some momentum going in your life
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>>17733218
Not OP but I don't smoke weed and have the same issue. Have antidepressants really helped you? I know therapy and medication can be expensive and don't always work.
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>>17733213
you have to ask yourself why you are doing what you do. If you can't think of any reason, ask the others why they are doing it and make the one you think is the best your own.
If you want a temporary solution however there are apps that let you keep track of what you have to do and reward you [virtually]. I use life rpg but there are others.
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Hey /adv/ I've got a question
So my friend wants to get a job in the make-up industry and she really has her heart set on it
Right after high school she plans to move to L.A to go to a forprofit college that is $20,000 a semester
apparently her parents can only pay for some of it and she has to take the rest on in loans
Should I confront her on this or just keep my fucking mouth shut?
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>>17733201
do some research if you can. even if something is for profit that doesn't mean they are a scam. when it come sto something as specific as this a for profit school can offer you an actual education in what you need. its not like traditional art where you're just wasting money to hone something, there is actual technique to all this.
do some research and if you can find her a better deal, recommend that to her. but as lon gas she isn't trying to limit herself to 'look good' make up, then dont try to crush her dream. as far as dream jobs go doing make up for films and movies isn't that hard to accomplish.
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>>17733210
It's not a scam I looked it up
What I'm worried about though is the fact that the only loans they offer have devastating interest
Also the fact that apartments in LA are expensive as fuck
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>>17733219
it is, but its pretty much the only place to really make it as a make up artist.
and yes, they're expensive, but young people (especially not women) are becoming homeless by moving here.
girls have a much eaiser time getting jobs, and in LA its even easier for them. even gay bars will hire them its disgusting.
all college is expensive, and all of it is virtually useless at this point. i do recommend everyone having some sort of back up plan, but i moved out here and did just fine. yes im super lucky, but most of us do make it by.
the few who don't pack it up and go home. its not hte end of her life if her dream fails and she moves home for some office job and has to pay off her student loan. its just like everyone fucking else in the country.
she'll move to one of the outlying towns that take only 20 minutes to get to central LA.
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Hi /adv/
This is my first time posting here and Im not even sure this is the right place for this but I need you input.
When I was young (early teens) I lived with a group of friends for a few months. Or atleast I thought they were my friends. Point is they were pretty bad guys. Assholes desu.
Ive always thought of myself as an immensely strong person. And Ive always had high self esteem, an inflated ego even, although quite justified given Ive always been smarter than pretty much everyone around me.
And yet I have a problem.
The fact that I let those assholes bully me for three months bothers me much more than I could possibly describe to you in one post. I feel angry, bitter and somehow impeded in life.
How do I get over that?
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>>17733157
Bump
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>>17733157
That's not the rightest way to do this but if you're as smart as you say, you can plan a way to make them lose their face. The rightest way though is to make new friends.
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>lonely and depressed
>cubs win
>"Hey that's cool!"
>update Facebook profile picture to represent cubs
>wake up next day
>one of my only close friends calling me names and shit because I have a Cubs picture because I told him once before I didn't like baseball much
>right after makes a subliminal post about his realization that he dislikes one of his friends all of a sudden
>hasn't responded to me since
What the fuck is this shit? Initially, I tried to act like I didn't care but I've accepted the fact that I really don't have any friends anymore. He was one of the only people I talked to on a regular basis. It's been bothering me all day now especially because I don't even know if this guy is referring to me or because I don't even remember doing anything to him. How am I supposed to handle this? We've been friends for years.
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>>17733019
And yeah, I know this post is bitch shit. Unfortunately, depression and anxiety won't let me ignore my loneliness and when my last ounce of human interaction appears to be dissolving out of thin air it's hard not to worry. I'm trying to be more open to advice so hopefully someone will help me a bit.
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you're a bandwagon meme faggot who doesn't even like baseball
i would be talking shit too
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>>17733040
although he sounds like a faggot too 2bh
i may also be a faggot
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Is it possible to be in love with someone, but so deeply in denial that you can't even say it in your head?
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You can't force love, you can grow to love someone but if you can't think it then not yet.
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She's qter without makeup
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also left is hotter
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I met this girl about 3 months ago over Tinder, she seemed nice, we got along well, I met up with her on campus a few time to hang out. She kind of seemed to be shifting back and forth between being interested and not being interested, but I just assumed it was me being neurotic as usual. Then finally last week she invited me over to her place to hang out with her and some friends. Eventually her friends left and it was just us, we ended up watching netflix and cuddling, and we kissed right before I left.
Finally I think things are looking up, and today I text her and we end up having a conversation where she decides to tell me she's "always looked at me as a friend".
Now I've just been spending the day feeling like shit.
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Maybe she just fucked up and meant to say something else. You know women, they say one thing and mean another. Fucking women I'll tell ya, if we men could breed eachother women would go extinct.
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>>17732998
She claimed she wasn't sober on when I was at her place, and I know for a fact that's bullshit.
What led up to the conversation was that she mentioned she had a date with some girl she's had a crush on. So I asked her what's going on between us.
She just kept apologizing... I have a feeling she just wanted to use me for sex that night. She asked when my last girlfriend was, and when the last time I had sex was, and when I told her that I was a virgin she had this who reaction like "NOOOOOOO.... are you serious!?",
I tried to call her out on lying about being drunk, and told her that I'm not some kind of innocent charity case just because I haven't had sex before.
She just denied it and kept apologizing...
Said it was up to me if I wanted to stay friends or not.
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How do I get over this shit.
Is there any reason I should hold out hope?
Should I even stay friends with her?
Should I message her again at some point?
Anonymous
Struggling with social anxiety 2016-11-04 01:19:33 Post No.17732959
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Struggling with social anxiety 2016-11-04 01:19:33 Post No.17732959
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Struggling with social anxiety
Anonymous
2016-11-04 01:19:33
Post No. 17732959
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Well, I'm asking 4-chan for help right now because of anxiety caused by lack of trust. I have a story on why but I don't know if anyone would want me to tell it now. I can if anyone wants.
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Next time, just say what's on your mind or no one will really care about your concerns. Just an fyi I'm talking from experience here.
So what happened?
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>>17732959
Nope, you sound like you belong on /r9k/.
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>>17733008
Alright so it's a long story
> Be me 17
>beta fag
>get depressed so start smoking pot and hanging out with shitbags who just use me for weed
>fine with it don't even care
>they introduce me to this girl let's call her "k"
> solid 8/10 but shy and a little awkward just like me
> we hang out and talk about her soon to be ex and what a dick he is
> we spend literally the next two weeks talking to each other non-stop. I don't want to stop
>fall madly in love with her
>ask if she wants to hang out as more than friends
>she says she wants to get over her old boyfriend. I say ok
Anyways, we eventually hangout again as friends in a group, all traveling about having fun. My friend who knew her longer asks if she is going to hang out with Kurt later tonight. Kurt is the town druggie. Sure I smoke pot but this guy does heroin. I plead with her not to talk to him. I love her and don't want her to get hurt. She says she knows what she's doing. I leave scared for her. Eventually we never talk and never get invited to hang with only friends. Eventually get invited to a party with all old friends. I drink heavily and smoke heavily, trying to loosen enough to breathe. Leave party after drunkenly stumbling around for about 4 hours. I hear girls saying their going to die of secondhand embarrassment from me.
Fast forward about a week
Get call saying never to talk or look at k ever again. I ask why and the caller claims that I was staring at and taking pictures of k's best friends ass. I obviously wasn't despite being very drunk. Friends all resent me and think I'm Satan. Eventually develop anxiety and can't trust anyone out of fear they'll fuck me over like she did. I don't know what to do and I'm skipping almost all uni classes out of fear of being laughed at. I don't know what to do anymore.
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Does anyone else here not tell lies? I feel as if I'm the only one. Should I change my ways?
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Hi! I make a point of not lying, ever, except in the most extreme circumstnaces. Moral reasons and all that. Funny thing is, I'm known as the devious trickster among my friends, since I say outrageous truths with a smile on.
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>>17732956
Do you ever feel like your life could've been a lot better if you were to disregard your honesty in order to get what you wanted?
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>>17732948
Well first of all, "everybody lies" and no one is perfect.
Second: do you genuinely care for your fellow man, friends and family?
If so, doing what you feel is right while considering the impact of your actions will only be good for you and those you love.
Last, realize that lying is done to escape consequence. Again, no one is strong enough to bear all things every time, but every little bit helps. The more problems you accept and personal responsibility you acknowledge, the more powerful your self-mastery will be.
corporatecancer (ID: !U//MLF6UK6)
company annual party 2016-11-04 00:53:21 Post No.17732895
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company annual party
corporatecancer (ID: !U//MLF6UK6)
2016-11-04 00:53:21
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Apparently we have this mandatory company event where each person has to perform something, and if you have no skills, they'll assign you something like dancing or acting, teach you what to do and you do it. But wtf isn't this employee harassment?? I fear I'll get treated worse at work as a result of going through with this.
As an extremely socially awkward person should I find a way out of it.
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>>17732895
helpful bunch u lot are <3
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that's complete bs. companies are turning into fucking cults
call in sick? If it's mandatory I don't really know what other way you can avoid it.
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>>17732895
People love karaoke. Even if you suck at singing you can entertain everyone by pretending to be really into it and putting in a real effort
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Im a 20yo girl, I've been friends with this guy for over 3+ years (Not very close friends but we've hung out with our friend group a lot, we have the same insterests, etc.)
He asked me out a couple of weeks ago and I accepted because I really like him and I think we could work, thing is, he doesn't show much interest in me? I've been in a few dates with him and though we have fun and stuff he just doesn't seem too much into me in the first place. Like, besides our dates he never speaks to me online (he's on facebook constantly speaking with his friends but not to me), sometimes he starts up a conversation just asking how i'm doing and we would talk about some trivial thing for a few minutes and the conversation will die. I always do my best to keep it up but he just doesn't seem interested in talking that much.
I also tried like, flirting with him to see his response but he just answers with smiley emojis or makes a joke out of it.
I really don't know what to do, he seems nice and we get along well, our dates were fun (though nothing happened there which would signal he likes me as more than a friend), I should believe he likes me since he asked me out but he just doesn't open up and I don't know which signs to look for to know what's going on in his head, I'm just scared he's trying to make fun of me or something.
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Ask him what he thinks of you. Not on text, face to face. only you can gauge his body language
as for being afraid he's making fun of you, this is a thing that happens to lots of people, you have to realise that a person who was stringing you along for that long would be a a psycho, which means you wouldn't want to be with that person.
so, just ask him, face to face, "do you like me? why do you never respond to me when we talk? i want your dick."
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Lets say that a spotlight was shining down on you, not him.
What do you want? The more we focus on what you want the more happier you will be with your relationship.
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>>17732835
Maybe he wasn't really sure about his feelings so he just wanted to get clear and after he saw that a friendship with you would be better he is trying rn to give you the hint that he isn't that interested to get back on the friend area he wants to friend zone you know kinda
Or he just wasn't ready to or won't get in a relationship because when you both wouldn't get along anymore the whole group would Splitt (how I met your mother style)
... Sorry for my bad English by the way ...
Anonymous
Going to get laid off 2016-11-04 00:24:12 Post No.17732833
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>work as a temp for a company for about seven months
>last week there was an opening and I applied and got it
>literally had the offer letter in my hand
>yesterday the head of HR comes to me and asks for the letter back and tells me they moved too quick
>figure that they had to give the temp company two weeks before hiring me
>find out today that the company got bought out by IFF (fragrance company)
>pretty much told I'm fucked by every manager
>literally their advice was you'll be find you're young
>managers tells me they'll give me excellent references or at least try to place me somewhere in the industry
My question is how fucked am I? I was going to be hired on the seventh. How do companies even look at this. I can't say I worked for my current company because I was a temp. I don't even think I get unemployment. It's compounded by the fact that my student loans start coming in this month. I basically lost a 45k job that I worked for seven months to get at a terrible fucking wage.
I'm freaking the fuck out right now.
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Jesus fuck, Opie. I'm so sorry. It's gonna be really hard to come back from this.
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Also these are for you, best of luck in your endeavors.
http://www.winnersworld.com/motivational/R_H_Jarrett.pdf
http://www.what-is-coaching.com/support-files/lazymansway2riches.pdf
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>>17732855
Yeah it sucks but does it look bad that I got laid off IE fired because the company got bought out? Nothing is really final till January but still I'm somewhere between pissed and terrified.
>>17732856
Thanks anon
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Advice on how to move a vending machine with just 2 (maybe 3) people?
Pic related is what Im talking about. Is there anyway I can get this out of a building without hiring movers? Thanks
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>>17732754
You'll need one of these
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Tilt it and turn it with one of the corners touching the floor, go back and for like that.
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>>17732754
Use a refrigerator dolly you retard
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I'm an atheist with Lutheran parents, and my wife is a non practicing Catholic. We were not married within the Catholic church.
Both of our mothers want our new baby baptized, with my wife and her mom preferring it be a Catholic baptism.
Will we have any problems getting our kid baptized catholic? Also, I want my niece to be a godparent even though she is non catholic, and I don't think she's baptized. Is there anything we should lie to the preacher about in order to get it to happen? Do they do much background checking? What should we expect?
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You have a mental illness.
It's called believing in a religion.
I'd get that sorted before you do anything else.
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>>17732682
>I'm an atheist
>believing in a religion
Did you even read the post?
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Traditionally most churches will assume that you are already catholic. That said, call up the local church, ask them about a baptism, set up a date and go for it.
During the date at the mass, usually you will sit in the front, till the priest announces you, go up, light the candle, baptize the baby, say blessing, they will have you sign out a certificate, done, the end. Mass may be boring but it's only an hour in most places, and if your not autistic about being atheist, them most people won't care.