Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3245. page

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How do I improve my humor sense?

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I'm a 23 year old male and my girlfriend is 26. We're both at university and the relationship is awesome. I just have this weird feeling that people look weirdly at her because she's older than me. Would she feel weird about it?

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You guys keep saying "don't be an orbiter". But what exactly IS an orbiter? How do I know if I'm one and what's so bad about being one?
Is it just a r9k buzzword?

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Are my teeth are normal, if not how to fix it?Already used dental braces it still looks like that, it was worse though

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Ok /adv/ I need some help getting over something very petty that happened acouple of days ago and I don't understand why I'm obsessing over this, this might be a lengthy green text but here goes
>be me
>worked a midnight shift with eight other people for nine hours to get some extra pay
>people I'm working with are really nice, made some small talk with them
>manager working with us told us that half of us would go on break now and the other half an hour later
>so I go into the break room first and sit down by myself in a corner booth
>just after I ate a midnight snack everyone working the shift all come in
>manager decided that we would all have our break together instead of breaking it up so everyone working all came in to
>said manager suprised us with food she bought for us just because we were working a long ass shift
>everyone grabs something but I akwardly still sit at the corner table on my phone, I thought it would have been weird for me to suddenly come up and grab food without saying anything
>they all sit down at one table all talking to eachother having fun and laughing while I'm sitting in the corner trying to decide whether or not I should sit over there with them
>ultimatly decide not to go until they invited me over to sit
>break was a hour long because our shift was for nine hours, but 40 minutes into the break one of the coworkers come over and ask me why am I so quiet while I'm browsing on my phone
>reply with "just tired" and she walks back to the table and continue on talking
>suddenly after the break ends I instantly regret not going over and hanging out with them
I don't get it /adv/, I know it was just a one hour break, but I don't get it, I felt like everyone were getting to know eachother and laughed and had fun with eachother and I was just akwardly sitting in their shadow and I felt like I had a great opertunity to get to know my coworkers and my manger and befriend them but I ruined it and it's been getting to me ever since

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There's this make neighbor that is constantly, blatantly hitting on my gf. She's totally creeped out by him. He'll straight up rub himself outside his pants when looking at her. Cops won't do anything - said no crime. I just want to make this creeps life as miserable and preoccupy him with something else so he leaves her alone. What do I do?

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I NEVER feel hungry, can this be anything other than cancer?
I am a 25 year old male, I've searched the internet high and low but there doesn't seem to be any reassurance out there for me. I lost my appetite seeminly over night about 3 months ago. Over that time I have seen 4 different doctors and they have presribed various things like laxatives and acid reflux as I have also had mild digestive complaints on and off. None of these have had boosted my appetite though. I still enjoy eating and do so to keep my energy levels up, but I never actually get hungry and sometimes I get bloated after meals. I also had a colonscopy (I requested it) to rule out colon cancer and it was all clear so the doctor just gave me anti-anxiety meds assuming my lack of appetite was psychological. Only thing is I'm convinced it's not and have seen another doctor who I persuaded to give me an ultrasound. Doctor doesn't seem too worried though and just seemed to imply I'm a hypochondriac.
Assuming I am right about the lack of appetite being physical, can it really be anything else but cancer? I'm convinced what I am experiencing now is cachexia, or wasting from late stage cancer. I can't help but think it's pancreatic cancer with liver mets as I also have digestive complaints (have even had floating stools for a while now), I initially considered this just to excedingly rare in people my age but my symptoms just seem textbook cancer. All in all just can't really believe this is happening and I'm terrified about the ultrasound

I DONT WANT TO FUCKING DIE

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How do I keep my shower room warm?

The red parts in the window area constantly blow freezing air from the outside. The gaps are about two inches wide and you can't reach back there. The window's closed, naturally.

My temporary solution has been stuffing it with four various towels which helps slightly though they end up getting soaked which in turn produces mold.

So, what can I do? This is a one year rental so I can't spray anything on it, not that that'd work.

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I'm at the end of my rope here with fatigue. It's extremely hard for me to fall asleep, and hard to stay asleep. The slightest noise wakes me up. Sometimes I wake up because I need to pee, I'm hungry, or if the raccoon comes back at 3am to eat suet, scratching on the glass and wood of my room. That's super annoying.

So I just can't stay asleep. I'm looking into earplugs or earmuffs that are both comfortable to sleep on my side with. Just anything please I need help

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How do you best make a suicide look like an accident? Preferrably the kind that wouldn't be caused by carelessness nor can be blamed on anyone else. Also no firearms, or related suicide-by-cop scenarios.

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Girl I'm interested in just texted me, "I don't think you should drive down to see me, I'm not worth that much effort."

I've been driving 2 hours every weekend just to see her. How should I interpret this message?

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Recently just been skipping school and pretending im ill mostly because I cant be fucked and because I dont really see the point in the majority of the work I do. Its not a bullying problem or anything like that but I wanted advice on if i should continue chilling at home and missing school and if this will have any long term effects besides a drop in grades?

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So my girlfriend asked me today to have sex with her for the first time. This was my first time in general, and I just felt so nervous about the whole thing, that I could barely keep it up, leading to nothing really happening from that. She says she wants to try again tomorrow, but I don't want the same thing to happen. Any ideas on how I can fix this before tomorrow?

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Should I be worried? I was on Whisper and someone made a post about being horny or whatever and I sent her a message. I asked for her age (she's 19 and I'm 22) and then I asked for her Kik. She sent a video of her touching herself and then afterward mentioned that she is special needs. I asked what does she mean and she said she has mental issues and her parents are overprotective.

I asked exactly what problems she had and she quit responding. So I don't know what was wrong with her. Is there anything that I done that could have been illegal? If so, am I going to get v&?

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My ex-girlfriend and I keep texting each other since the break up happened in September.

She ALWAYS texts me first, and for some time back in October I had a week that went well with her, lots of flirting, warmth, and some sexual texts.

We have weeks here and there that we don't talk for 5-10 days until she messages me again. Again, always her first, I never initiate.

We talked about the US election while we watched it and it was a pretty good time and we had alot of fun, sent over 500 texts.

Then on Veterans day she texted me again wishing me a happy Veterans day (ex afghan war vet) and we texted a shit ton then too.

Then we didnt talk for ~10 days until she texted me before leaving out of state to go visit her sister for thanksgiving. Then she wished me a happy thanksgiving, and later that night she send me some photos of her in her bikini without any context. I compliment her and she says thanks etc.

Now weve been lightly texting every day since then but today she drank a bit and then told me she was horny, so ofcourse I caved and asked if she was alone, to which she replied "Ew no not for you hahaha" and ofcourse I got upset, and I simply told her to Go to bed, and not lead me on like that again.

What's her endgame /adv/? Is there something there for me?

I really like her still, and I think of her all the time. I do want her back but I keep waiting for her to want me back I guess?

I'm really torn over her, and I feel pretty sad about her ending the relationship. The reasons were mainly due to circumstance, but she wont admit it I think.