>quiet qt in class
>have short conversation with her neat beginning of year
>just introducing ourselves, oh hey what's up, are you going to this event blah blah blah
>don't talk for a bit
>go to sit down next to her in class
>before I even open my mouth to say "hey what's up?" she moves one chair away from me
>don't say anything to her, think maybe the computer she was at wasn't working or something, whatever I'll have another chance to talk to her
>some other dude comes and sits between us and uses computer
>end of the year, haven't talked to her since despite wanting to because weirded out
what the fuck did I do
I'm not fat, I don't smell like shit, I'm not model quality but I also don't think I'm Rocky fuckin' Dennis ugly
is it even worth trying to get to know her now or no
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pls help me /adv/ I'm ever so depressed
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She made a bitch move, but if too much time has passed you blew it.
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that bitch doesn't deserve your attention, op
Anonymous
Advice on loving yourself 2016-11-30 00:09:57 Post No.17808683
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Advice on loving yourself
Anonymous
2016-11-30 00:09:57
Post No. 17808683
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I literally cannot fathom how to love myself? How do I get out of self esteem that is nonexistent? How do I stop being so painfully self-loathing. It's making life very difficult.
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>>17808683
what do you do that you enjoy?
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do things
set goals
accomplish tasks
unlock achievements
it builds up
takes a while though
>t. used to hate myself
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>>17808703
Anything in specific you enjoy to do hobby wise?
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Is this a red flag? I have an awful ability to attract crazy women. I really like her though.
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no...
what about her makes you wonder if it is?
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You sound like a red flag.
> gets text
> omg she's crazy
I'd hate to try to feel secure around you
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>>17808707
Isn't that a bit too harsh? The lad is probably just worried and probably doesn't know what to do.
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I think I love my girlfriend but it kind of feels like we're just really good friends.
I don't really remember falling head over heels for her or thinking 'wow this girl is amazing' or even getting butterflies like I have for other girls.
I still find myself lusting over other girls or having those moments where I see a pretty girl not he bus and imagine having a life with them for a moment.
It's only been 6 months but I couldn't imagine not being with her, I feel like she's good for me in the long run.
We're both virgins and I'm sure we're going to have sex soon but she doesn't really seem to have much of a sex drive like me. I feel like she's sort of just doing it for me. Maybe this has something to do with the way I'm feeling?
Also, our conversations are quite one sided sometimes. We don't have much in common so sometimes it ends up me just talking at her for long periods of time and her listening, which is okay sometimes but other times I want to hear from her but she struggles with that depending on the moon she's in, and usually that's a non-talkative kind of mood. Sometimes she can even come across as a bit robotic, like she doesn't really have any interests of her own or really cares about anything and just kind of goes along with everything. I know it sounds a bit weird but I really wish I could have a proper argument with her, she hardly ever expresses any kind of anger towards me, she goes kind of quiet and avoids any kind of conflict if we disagree on something.
Sorry about how messy and long this post is. I'm just finding it really hard to write down about how I'm feeling because I'm very confused myself. I think part of me thinks she isnt the one but another part of me doesn't want to be lonely. I know I'll be worse off without her if I'm on my own. Also, I'm not very comfortable with change.
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I'm 19 btw
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Bumping for advice as well. I am literally going through same exact thing, the difference is she's not my girlfriend yet, and some adv would help before I get into anything
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Only you know if you love your gf. But generally, if you have to ask then you probably don't
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My roommate and best friend has really aggressive herpes on her face and it makes me not want to live with her anymore.
Everyone says you can only get it through skin to skin contact yet that's not how she got it, she got it from someone she works with somehow - just being in close quarters and sharing the same work area.
Anyways, I'm tired of being paranoid. I don't want herpes that I need to take medication for to not have constant break outs (seems to be the case with her).
Of course I won't tell her that's why I want to move out. But, am I a bad person? Am I being perfectly reasonable or unreasonable and paranoid?
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A better question would be. Why do you care?
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not unreasonable
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>>17808673
Because I don't want fucking herpes, obviously. I have enough shit to worry about.
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>have summer fling with qt whose a year younger than me before I move away for uni
>make it clear that it's a fling
>start acting like a couple, both fall in love
>lots of red flags - self harms, has a scary psycho ex, vomits/doesn't always shower
>leave for uni anyway, she has breakdown, is on suicide watch,vomits/screams/doesn't go to school for like a week
>spend first few weeks of uni racked with guilt, spend two weeks in bed sick with worry, stop taking care of self
>visit home on like the third or fourth weekend, because I was on the verge of suicide unless I did something decisive
>buy her roses, tell her I love her and that I'm sorry
>says she's up for sleeping with me still but she has an emotional block up and she's worried she'd end up hurting me and that she felt like I liked her more than she did me
What went wrong? What did she mean by this?
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*bump*
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little help?
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*bump again*
Am I a bad person? Should I be ashamed?
hey, there's this girl i am attracted to who is in all of my classes and we sit by each other, so today she put her arms around me and brushed her fingers through my hair and said "hey anon" and i said hey back and while it was our lunch break she sat by me and leaned on my lap like she was sleeping on me and she also winked and blew a kiss at me when i left. Is she interested to me or is she playing around?
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>>17808594
playing around. better drop out of college and move to alaska just to avoid embarrassment.
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>>17808594
How the fuck would we know? Sounds like she's pretty interested tbqh famalam, I'd personally give it a red hot go
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lmao how much more blatant do you want her to be?
just ask her out. if she is just playing around, you'll know. if not, then you have a girlfriend.
it's not that hard
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My girlfriend of a year broke up with me yesterday.
Everything was beautiful. We got along, we always had fun, we had hopes and dreams. Everything. We were perfect and everyone around us thought so too. Then she just started crying and told me that we weren't going to work that she has been unhappy for a month and thought it would go away but it wouldnt. She couldnt take it anymore and broke up with me. She never let me know anything was wrong, she never let me know anything. She says shes taking a break to step back from it all and see what was making her unhappy. To see what she wants from life.
What can I do? She's all I ever wanted...its never hurt this bad.
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eh. just give her space. obviously she is going through something. say that if she does want to talk, you can talk. but otherwise don't initiate any contact with her.
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>>17808551
When we were breaking up, and I was asking her why she just said we werent good together and that our differences wouldnt work. But then she talked about getting back together in the future, but she wouldnt know if she could or not.
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I assume you're in your earlier twenties at the latest. Just move on man, people under 25 are unstable wrecks, there is no point trying commit while you're this young.
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My mom caught my 13 year old little brother having sex with his 12 year old girlfriend.
She is super pissed at him and has grounded him for a month then called her parents and got her in trouble. She wanted me to talk to him about this since I'm a guy and our dad is not around. Instead of scolding him I told him good job but he should be safe and explained safe sex to him and explained the consequences of his actions and how it could ruin his life. He seemed to really take it to heart and admitted that he didn't use a condom but it was his first time and he didn't get to finish. I took him to the store to buy condoms behind our mom's back and told him to keep it a secret and he was grateful.
I spoke to my girlfriend about it and she said I shouldn't be encouraging kids to have sex but the way I see it that ship has sailed so I might as well teach him to be safe. Did I do the right thing?
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>>17808532
>Did I do the right thing?
i think you did. at the end of the day, he is likely going to be fucking again soon anyway, he will just be more careful next time. good thing you told him about safe sex, he sounded clueless
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>>17808532
Kids are naturally sexual, especially so in our modern society. Which is part of why it's such a joke when parents react as your mom did here. Moreover, 13/12 isn't considered a child, but rather the beginning of adulthood, at least as far as girls are concerned, in other cultures and the world over, historically.
That said, you probably coached your bro as best as he needs. Just make sure too that he understands that sex is for love when you're an adult, or he may become some sexed out freak when he gets older. Purely speculation though, he's still just a kid in a crazy world at this point. No concerns here.
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Normally I'd think this is okay but 12 is way too young. They need to be taught not to do it not setting them up to fuck a lot more
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I need help in my long distance relationship and education choices
I live in europe, and my girlfriend in america. We have lived together for months before already and met a bunch of times because we met during an exchange she did close to me.
To keep it short now, she wants to come over here and live with me, but our visa options for her aren't really working out.
We can't get a live together visa because I'm going to school soon and we need to meet a certain monetary requirement which I can't meet.
She can't get a work visa here because she doesn't have a special skill that a company from here would go through the effort of hiring her, and she can't look for no skill jobs on a tourism visa here.
Study visa could work, but she isn't sure she can get accepted for a masters program here.
Essentially, I need to give up my own school dreams and work to make a living for the two of us if she's gonna come here, and I really don't want this.
This is really fucking stressful for us, has anyone here been in a similar situation? How did you do? Do I have to break up with her?
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>>17808506
do you guys not have marriage licenses there? in america, if you married her, you'd be allowed to live and work here.
does that not work over there?
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Sadly it does not work here, even for married couples here you need to earn a living to cover for two people, and us marrying and me going to the states right now is not an option because my country offers tax paid education, and I couldnt afford going to school in the states.
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>>17808648
id try to finish your education in the US if she means that much to you.
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I'm 16 never been even close to a girl as far as a relationship work at a dinosaur park management takes us all on a trip to salt lake city to study some of the fossils at the natural history museum since they have a lot of not displayed stuff in their lab
Get There and decide to go through the exhibits before going in to the lab
See a 8/10 with blue hair (I think it's hot) looking at an allosaurus strike up conversation about the allosaurus
Find out she a dinosaur nerd
Say I will get us into the lab
She's ecstatic
Tell guy at lab door she is with me and the dinosaur park (half true)
She is so happy and helps me get my measurements of teeth and jaw length of 2 t rex skulls which I am studying specifically the mouth and teeth
She even points out some features I didn't notice that help me with my studies
Hang out with her both days we at in town
When I go to leave she says to call her so we can do it again sometime
Oh I will yesterday I get home and try to cal her but
I NEVER got her number all I have is a first name and a two state separation
How bad did I fuck up?
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>>17808480
>how bad did i fuck up
does it matter? i mean i could put a number on it but you know the consequences of what happened.
etiher way shes two states away so whats it matter? enjoy it for what it was, a nerd fling.
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>>17808480
probably was a good thing in the long run because she lives two states away. at least you got got a confidence boost?. you should keep at talking to girls and such. i was really shy with girls at your age at it has not helped me at all now that i am 22. you should read as much as you can, if you dont (some proper advice).
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>>17808480
>Blue hair
Shes probably on chads dick right now on a live stream while poorly playing League
My roomate moved her tv out of the living room this morning. I woke up and heard a guy talking all morning since like 8am and totally fuked up my sleep and I didn't get up till 11. I got out my room and her tv was gone and they were watching it in her room.
I'm a super considerate roommate, clean, I've only had a friend and my boyfriend over a handful of times in the past month and a half I've been there and I always text her first to let her know and introduce them to her, and ask her to hangout with us.
She's kinda not that friendly and hogs the living room is in there 24/7 and I'm not even home for like 8-10 hours everyday so I'm barely there at all. I don't ever use her tv and stuff besides like three times bc she seems like I get a vibe she doesn't want me to so I'm basically trapped in my bedroom all the time . She's also passive aggressive and like left a recycling how to guide on top of the trash can and does shit like that
Idk waht to do? My lease was only 4 months bc I wasn't sure if I'd like it so I'm gona move out after but I still have 2 months left
Also I sleep at my boyfriends a lot ok top of never being there besides for like one to three hours before I sleep and one or two hours in the morning
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Pegasus Uchiha of th (ID: !!kDL3tdem6J7)
2016-11-29 23:02:56
Post No.17808476
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>>17808471
Fuck your boyfriend hard and yell while she's trying to sleep
That'll teach her
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>>17808471
ask if you can move out early. claim your friend you wanted to move in with is available now an dyou two are going to find a place.
if she says no, too bad, stick it out til the end of the 4 months, but if you are subletting in her apartment (which sounds like it) then she likely wont care as long as you give her the appropriate notice.
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>>17808471
Blah blah blah blah
>i am an average girl so i will complain 10x more than is necessary to get the point across
>roomie is rude, wat do
Venting can be healthy but I'm sure you've already complained about this before coming to 4chan, so the 1st dose of advice will be to chill out. Some people are assholes, some people are simply retarded regarding consideration, and some people are both.
If it bothers you this much, put on your adult pants and CALMLY, logically confront your roomie with your views. If they cannot or will not see reason, then you're stuck for a bit and will have to make the best of it (protip: be mature), but odds are that if you come to them without being emotional and make a solid, reasonable case, you will all be able to reach a better understanding.
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~4K in savings...
homeless in california
living with friends (in and out of houses)
not a drug addict
mentally feel stuck (ocd, depression, repetitive indecisive thought patterns and intrusive thoughts).
not sure what to do at this point.
im going on 23 years old and have no job, no car, no path.. (some work skills)
have thought of getting social security but don't think its for me..
I moved here 2 years ago and have been living off savings since, drifting around being depressed.
what the fuck am I doing. I just want to be normal for once.
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>>17808418
either own your problems, or move back home with mom and dad so they can take care of you.
saying OCD, depression, reptitive indecisive thoguht patterns is not OWNING your problems. its creating a magical excuse fairy.
look at tumblr. they list any mental disability they want, and wear it with pride, cuz it excuses them from having to do anything.
people even do it here on /adv/
>how get gf
>go talk to girls
>i cant do that cuz i have social anxiety :^)
and then they act happy becuase they validated their own insecurities. they wrote it off as 'welp god doesnt want that for me, so i dont have to feel bad, except for as a victim'.
what part of california are you in?
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>>17808418
Then get a normal Job. Any Job will do for the beginning. Move up from there. Apprentice Jobs at your age are a good idea, cause you can move up/ progress within them.
Get therapy as soon as you have money. If your money isn't enough: Churches often offer free counseling. Not as good but better than nothing.
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>>17808418
>repetitive indecisive thought patterns and intrusive thoughts
monkey mind !
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLjelIPg3ys
pls watch !
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>be 27 old neet
>have the chance to get two jobs that doesn't ask for my CV and I already know the guys
>kissless virgin
how do I stop being nervous about my fucking first job?
my hands are literally shaking of fear thinking I'll have to do work everyday instead of being a neet (all those responsabilities).
but I want to make money and stop being an useless piece of shit.
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Change is always scary but you're going to die
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>>17808419
o fuck
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>>17808416
Nothing will truly help until after you've worked a few days my friend. Instead of freaking about all the things that can (and will at some point) go wrong think about your first paycheck and buying yourself a meal, a beer, a vidya, clothes, whatever.
Between now and that first paycheck distract yourself with things so you don't implode your own brain, and if you have to think about work think about the positives of gainful employment.
Also lose some weight.
A girl that I really like just told me we were going too fast. I don't think we're going to meet again.
I feel like shit, the worst I've ever felt. Losing my income, my apartment and trust/respect from my peers all at the same time felt better than this.
I don't know what the fuck to do. What can I do to get through this?
Right now I'm clutching my face with one hand because we were making out just one hour ago. Fucking pathetic.
>pic not related
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>I don't think we're going to meet again.
just wait and see what happens, faggot
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>>17808413
She cited that there was a lack of chemistry, and I think I opened up too much.
I feel fucked.
But you're probably right.
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Fuck I need more advice. Sorry.