Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3144. page

easy, just stop being human

I'm trying to tone down my emotional responses as well, Vulcan-style. I intend to basically attempt to stay away from unstable people who lend themselves to histrionic situations too easily - I myself acknowledge that I exhibit these tendencies myself, but it typically comes about as a reaction to being around people of that ilk. My ex was depressed, unmotivated, willing to piss her life away doing nothing, willing to fuck me on the second date, cool with slashing her wrists at the drop of a hat, able to keep her ex's used condoms on her window sill, and I ended up having a nervous breakdown myself. It was as if her mental health problems became contagious to me. Being around her brought out a very ugly side of me - I became emotionally fragile, prone to losing my shit completely when drunk, and nearly guilt tripped myself into suicide/leaving society. Truthfully, I went from a guy who had a lot of repressed issues but on the surface seemed able to keep his cool, to a jittery, crying, suicidal fag. I hit my nadir when I got horribly, pass-out drunk with my ex, and ended up claiming that I had tried to commit suicide (a half truth - in reality I'd just spent weeks in my dorm doing fuck all and waiting for death), and hysterically begging her mother for forgiveness for "ruining her daughter's life".

I don't ever want to see that guy again, so my resolve is to challenge myself every single day. Don't be a prick and only do things that directly profit you, but make sure you're in situations that encourage maturation and independence. Don't totally switch off your emotions, because that's just another form of a mental breakdown, but only show them when the situation really, really, really calls for it. Become a hardass, basically. Not a prick, but someone who doesn't get drawn into hysterics.

>>17836971
>It hurts way too much

Obviously not, or you'd stop.

It hurts a lot, you mean to say. You want the amount it hurts now to be enough to make you stop caring about people forever, but trust me, it isn't. You keep caring about people because you're looking for someone who deserves it.

Keep looking, anon. People worth caring about are out there.

you dont mind that hes really short?

or do you only want him for his $? you rostie

>>17837108
I don't mind that its smol its good (and hot in this case) actually. he also has a lot of charisma and a lot of sexual appeal w/ great ambition. I need a guy like that,

>>17836964
Go to a gay club/bar.

Hey anon, I'm a special ed teacher. I'm not trying to say you need a special ed teacher, but I have excellent social skills, and most of my students have aspergers or autism. Do you just want help socializing? Or something else?

>>17837617
i work with special needs kids too. what age group do you have in your class?
also, op, i agree with that anon, tell us what you need help with so we can give more specific pointers

>>17837658
I'm the kindergarten teacher until 3pm, and then I teach after school care until 6. Our school is entirely special needs. What about you?

I'm worried that I won't get my job with the military because I'm too old or not smart enough

Also, I'm an alcoholic

>>17836960
Why are you interested in just the military? There are lots of paths to get where you need to go. All I can say is that the most successful people will be successful doing whatever. There's some indian dude who became a millionaire owning the 711.
The alcoholism part is a different story, honestly it will take medical help to work on that. Just go to a doctor and tell them you really want to stop and you need help. Doctors are beaten down and will jump at the chance to actually help someone normally. You just gotta show them somehow that you mean business. Also talk to your family and friends and tell them that you are an alcoholic and you are stopping drinking. If they know they will keep you honest. It will not be easy. You gotta have willpower not for an average day, but enough to stop yourself when things are going wrong too.
Anyways would love to know more about your situation. I'm pullin' for you buddy.

~Mike

No one is attractive to me, when i get to know the person behind the mask.

getting a hardass spanking was common when i was growing up. you experienced some serious physical abuse as a kid. this is too common but still on the abnormal side.

you were abused; it's common but not ethical or "normal"

>>17836913
>>17836919
fuck

The most important thing, no matter what, is confidence.

No matter what you do is act like you wanted to do it
Shit, you could paint like Bob Ross and still be a dom if you act like this was what you wanted to do
Confidence, mate

>>17836902
I can do confidence.

Two of the girls have invited me to a threeway, that they apparently already hashed out. The other potential girls work with us, and so I need to make a reputation for myself.

A friend recommended me The New Bottoming Book by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton. They seemed to know what they were talking about, and I think they have at least one book out aimed more towards doms as well as bibliographies in their books filled with lots of other recommended material.

I hear good things about fetlife being a decent place to meet people and find local munches for connecting to the community and gaining tips from experienced members.

>>17836868
What do you want to do with it? What are your main priorities? Budget?

Generally ...

>poorfag who needs Interwebz
Some cheap Chromebook.

>semi poorfag
Either back to Chromebook or saving more for something decent.

>normal fag
2015 Retina Macbook 13'3"

>>17836883
I would prefer it to be as cheap as possible but still have at least 6gb of ram and be able to run oblivion

>>17836894
What kind of fucking mods do you use to need so much for it?

Though gayming disqualifies Chromebooks, almost any other laptop will do then, most do have 8GB either way these days, and even shitty internal GPUs will be fine for it.

Where do you want to buy it?

I like 'x' place, lets go.

>>17836873
That's absurd. It will never work.

>>17836861
tell us more about her. what are her interests

How do i tell if a girl likes me? Their is one that keeps eyeing me in class i have been told she likes me but they could be teasing. She eyed and smiled at me after school i dont like her though i like someone else what should i do?

Im a boy but i get called Ana so you can call me Ana:)

>>17836839
How was your day?

>>17836844
Hi Ana, you could try saying hi to her, even if you dont like her she might be nice, end up being your friend, friend with befenits, whatevs. Is always nice to know new people.

>>17836827
muzzies eat a lot of goat meat, so i'd believe it.

one of my pipedreams is to quit working and create a subsistance goat farm that I maintain by selling off extra goats to ahkbars

>>17836837
So I need a Akbar or tell her to convert to Islam right?

>>17836852
yeah as far as I understand you need a muzzie specially trained in arcane sandlore and inhumane animal slaughter to get a halal cert

Stretching the skin isn't the same as having your foreskin intact.

Why are you people so fucking weird?

>>17836814
>>17837462
>>17837464
excellent series of posts

upboated and subscribed

>>17836806
Why do you feel you need it?

>>17836806

By realizing that there can be no external source of affection or validation that is ever sufficent to prove to yourself that you are a worthy person; you must take a leap of faith that you are, and learn to like yourself and validate yourself.

It feels like being naked in a lecture hall full of clothed people and trying your best to be comfortable with it: It seems impossible until you decide to just fake it, and then you slowly forget you're faking it, and sometime later you remember you were supposed to be faking it, but you realize you no longer need to.

>>17836851
Because it feels bad when nobody cares when you're sad.

Having to cry quietly so you don't inconvenience anybody because nobody wants to see that.

"sorry i didnt take your side, everyone else confirmed that the other person was a shit cunt, and i ended up firing him. what can i do to make it up to you, son?"

are you so brain dead you cant work out what to say?

Just admit you were wrong.
Tell him what happened and try to reconcile with him.
Expect to get chewed out or maybe a swing.

>>17837258
I've tried telling him this, and he has never responded to me before. I'm not very certain that he will start now.

you're stupid.

>>17836803
Kind of know that by now, thanks.

Never send someone a wall of txt that is a guaranteed way to lose your girl it's over just find another girl you'll be fine

>>17836767
my first thought is chop the "10 phone calls" thing for something more impressive sounding

yes keep the college on there, if they ask (and they probably will) then just tell them straight up what your situation is and theyll probably be flexible

additionally if you want to play down your school put the work first

also have you done any volunteer work?

>>17836788
>chop the "10 phone calls" thing for something more impressive sounding

Like what?
My adviser said that it was fine to put that on there.

>>17836799
my suggestion would be using a stronger word like "responsible for answering" or some variation of that

i also recommend getting a student membership to some bullshit association that sounds good that you could put on there, or even 2 or 3. find cheap ones, or even just get on some mailing lists and claim student membership if you really want to explore the bounds of puffery

that said its probably good enough for entry paper pushing/reception