Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3079. page

Then I couple of days ago I looked into her phone, while she was sleeping, to see if she did in fact tell me about it (At this point I was having a hard time trusting her). It so happens she did write him, without telling me.. Nothing mayor really… But still.. Saying happy birthday, and asking for help with her schoolwork!? And I am like “Wauw…”. The morning after I ask her if she have had any contract with her ex.. She says “I just wished him a happy birthday”. Then I am just sitting and thinking “fucking liar”, I didn’t say anything at that moment, but now.. a couple of days later when I confront her, she just says that she forgot about the schoolwork part, and that it wasn’t that big of a deal… Furthermore, she got mad at me for looking in her phone while she was sleeping.
So.. I need your help.. Am I totally wrong here, and being a shit boyfriend? And how would you feel if your girl did this to you?
Ps. I wouldn’t get mad at her for keeping in contract with her ex, but the fact that she tries to hide and lie (or forget) about it for me, pissed me off.

>>17860404
Hwo would you feel if your so had no trust for you and went through your shit all the time? Fuck off, also she should have been honest and pointed him to a psych for his suicidal tendencies.

>>17860404
If you guys have been together for 3 years she should be done with this ex but she isn't. She values a continued relationship with him above the relationship she has with you and even when you asked her to choose she lied to you to shut you up and preceded with him. You cannot force her to stop or constantly monitor her forever. Only thing you can do is live with this or refuse and get away from her. She is making a fool out of you and doesn't care.

>>17860389
Tell him to man up and stop being a lil faggot. Go to a bar, be his wingman and get him laid.

Just be there for him. Tell him if he ever wants to talk to you about it, he can. Make him laugh, ask him if he wants to go do something you both enjoy - things to take his mind off of it.

Heartbreak takes time to heal, but having someone who cares about you and shows it will absolutely help to ease the pain

>>17860454
i'm his older sister, married and have kids... that would be a bit weird.

>>17860473
i feel like he won't talk to me and i have to accept that. i wish he would post on adv and i could tell him what i want to tell him about girls, love and relationship so his heart doesn't break completely over this and he doesn't get bitter over her...

>>17860364
>I don't like to get involved in others people business but my bro is my bro.
Sounds like you know what to do. If roles were reversed, wouldn't you expect and want your bro to deliver the hard news?

>Hey man, I hate to be the one to tell you this, especially because I set you two up, but ____ is not exclusive with you.

>>17860364
Are you literally brain dead? Yes tell him. And if he doesn't stop talking to her then he's retarded too.

You've one job.

Women are cold as fuck, damn.

The Quran.

Happiness by Matthieu Ricard
How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie.

The Death of Ivan Ilyich

>>17860355
Isnt Craigslist where dealers and perverts go?
Just find a girl you like, if it goes well and you end up in a relationship, she'll ask if you have any fantasies or anything.

You got me curious tho what's your fantasy?

>>17860441
Easier said than done with me having aspergers

but as for my fantasy I want to grope & finger a girl while she looks at porn

bump?

>>17860340
Is the education worth it? I want to eventually become a psychiatrist. But i feel like the concepts they teach in school isn't something I'd really enjoy reading at all. I'm really into psychoanalysis, attachment theory and depth psychology. I'm scared I'll enroll just to find everything shallow.

>>17860358
Worth is relative, you need to study all that to know which therapy your patient will benefit most from. Some of it might be boring but thats just how it is.
Im a psychiatrist so i went throu medschool and only realized last second that I don't want to be a surgeon or anything else. So most of that was rather useless for the job that I have now.
But that's how i got into it...and since I like my job i guess it was worth it.

>>17860340
Personality disorders: medical conditions, or trade names for incredibly bad habits?

I have a lot of trouble getting started. I've been struggling, probably my entire life, with momentum. I need a motivational overhaul, but I know I should start with "getting started". What recommendations can you make, or what would you want to know about me first?

>>17860316

RUN. AWAY. There's no magic combination of words that will change his mind. Just move on.

Run

Gotta be direct and firm when you bring it up. If he plays it off, be even more firm and maybe a little confrontational about it. Start with telling him you don't want him "joking" around like that, which doesn't let him play it off as a joke, and then if he keeps on doing it either be more firm and direct, as said before, or threaten to break up over it. Nobody, guy or girl, should have to go through emotional abuse like that just because the other one is purposefully obvious to its consequences or otherwise.

>>17860313
You can sue anyone for anything. Not successfully though.

>>17860323
Pretty much this.

>>17860323
It's scary how often the fp = bp on 4chan

Weed makes you paranoid

>>17860295
WEED IS GOOD FOR YOU BRO AND CURES CANCER.

Yeah weed makes some people paranoid, some people it doesn't, and some people it makes really paranoid.

I had a buddy just get out of prison and he hadn't smoked in years. He hit the bong once and he started freaking out thinking the cops were gonna bust us. He eventually called his girlfriend to come pick him up. It was kind of funny.

you're just paranoid and weed made you realize a few things about yourself

>>17860281
Good luck. A lot of men just learn to deal with it. Once you actually lose hair it is gone. You hair shrinks first. Minoxidil has to be used at least 6 months to take a noticeable effect and sometimes you barely get anything out of it. combine propecia and minoxidil or just learn to let go.

I used minoxidil for a year with barely any results but it did slow down my hairloss. Eventually I stopped caring and stopped using.

>>17860315
been using minoxidil for about a year and not sure if its slowed down anything but it's a pain to spend the money on it even though it doesn't actually work

i want a gf in this lifetime so idk if I can deal with the hair loss, I don't have enough of a personality or accomplishments to compensate for being bald and balding has deliberately sabotaged my development in life as I'm paralyzed by anxiety.

Causes of hair loss:
>Genetics
>Stress
>Washing your hair too much, not allowing it to develop it's natural oils.
>Poor diet
>lack of exercise
>Too much masturbation
>Constant head scratching
>Going outside in the cold with wet hair
>Not using a pillow case
>The list goes on.

How I cured my thinning hair:
>Limit hair washing to once every 2-3 days. I got a biotin/colagen conditioner and use it as a "cowash" meaning it acts as my shampoo and conditioner. You really only need to shampoo once or twice a week, when your hair is actually dirty. Unless you're working in a coal mine, you don't need to wash your hair with shampoo often.
>After I cowash, I rinse my hair with green tea and let it soak into my scalp for ten minutes. Green tea promotes hair growth.
>Started taking 10,000 MCG of biotin a day.
>also started taking an herbal hair growth supplement, 2 capsules three times a day.
>Got a pillow case.
>NEVER towel dry or use hairdryers. Pat your head with a towel to absorb excess water, then let it air dry.
>Drink plenty of water and avoid too much sugar.
>Drink lots of green tea.
>Cut masturbation down to once every 4-5 days MAX.


I saw results within a month. Good luck m8

If you weren't exclusive then her fucking that guy shouldn't matter but liars will always be liars think about that before getting in a relationship with this woman

>>17860256
Yeah i knew it was my problem that i felt jealous but what bothers me is that she was lying about it, which means she's trying to hide it, and that could be one of many. but i beat around the bush a little and asked in a roundabout way and she said she wasn't lying about anything, and when i pressed she got offended that i was calling her a liar. and obviously i can't say i read her texts.

>>17860248
yeah she's not acting weird because she likes you but because she is fucking that guy and lying to you about it.

If you want her as a fwb just shut up and admit to yourself she lies about fucking other people but if you want her for more you are going to get your heart ripped out if you continue

that's just anxiety,get used to talking to people and it should feel more natural

Idk man talk to a psychiatrist, maybe your brain chemicals are imbalanced or something

Maybe it's not related, but I can't remember almost nothing from my life between 2008-2012. Nothing strange happened then.

Do something that gives you confidence. Like taking some martial arts class, I don't know. Start asserting yourself in small ways like speaking first if someone asks who wants donuts. Say hello to people first. Then it gets easier.

>>17860209
>There has to be a way to increase my general presence

There is. It's called "Improving". Once you become a stronger, more experienced person, the confidence will be an afterthought. So get experience, try, learn, and eventually you'll be really a more capable person.

>>17860209
Go to gym, seeing your body become stronger will help your self esteem and make you feel healthier. But this will not fix your personality on its own but it will help.

Sounds like you know exactly what's going on OP if someone wants to actually reschedule they will "raincheck" with an actual time and date otherwise it's BS and they just don't want to see you

>>17860180
>Am I justified in just ignoring them at this point when they pull this shit?

Yes. If they are truly interested in your they will make the time to see you.

Are you texting/calling them before the date?

The best way to set a date is this:

>Meet qt
>confirm interest through casual conversation and flirting
>"We should get together sometime, what's your schedule like?"
>"definitely! I'm free Wednesday night."
>"Wednesday night sounds great, meet me at this pizza place at 8?"
>"Yessss I love pizza! Sounds great :)"
>"Cool, I'll see you there. What's your number in case something comes up?"

Then you get the number, and you meet her at the place at 8 on Wednesday. Do not text her, do not call her, just meet her there at 8. Don't confirm the date, just be there.

Your chances of getting stood up are minimal if there's no contact between the arrangement and the day of the date. If she contacts you to confirm the date just say "Of course, 8 oclock."

If she texts you random shit before the date, just ignore it until the next morning and respond with "Hey! sorry, left my charger at work yesterday. Looking forward to tomorrow night"


Let girls get excited for dates. Also, the more you text the less you have to talk about in person. Good luck m8.

File: 20491270491.png (338KB, 598x398px) Image search: [Google]

338KB, 598x398px

>>17860162
If you ask this question, then you're the latter type.

>>17860170
Fpbp

>>17860170
whats the logic behind this answer?