How do you all deal with loneliness? I'm a 23-year old kissless virgin who's trying to make something of himself after realizing a bachelor degree is useless without job experience. For the longest time, I thought the key to happiness was finding "the one", and being a KV has caused a lot of distress in my life as a result, but earlier this year I finally accepted the only one who can account for my happiness is myself. I started reevaluating how I think about things, and so far, it's had a positive effect on how I perceive myself, and life in general. While I'm still a ways off from "happiness", I've found contentment in myself and the people around me.
However, one thing that I feel is still holding me back is a pervading sense of loneliness. I have a few close friends that I can confide in to a certain extent, and I have a decent relationship with my family, but I still find myself craving more physical intimacy (e.g. cuddling, kissing, ect.). I can typically get by by focusing on my work, thinking about the gaming PC I'm saving up for, or just keeping myself preoccupied in general, but there's always this lingering feeling of emptiness. I crave affection, but I'm not sure how I can fill the void. Any tips?
I know that feel bro, i'm not a virgin, but i'm craving intimacy too, i'm 27, i have a crush on someone who just consider me as a friend, it's been 2 years since my break up with my ex, i feel lonely as ever i don't know how to deal with it.
I try to focus my mind on others things, but they seem so meaningless compared to someone's love.
I wish you the best bro, hope you'll find someone who'll love you very much, i know it's hard.
Courage.
have you tried filling the "void" with something like an apple.
>>17869843
I kidd. I guess just keep tryin man.
GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.
>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.
>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.
>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
I told him that i'm still in love with him. Is that enough for him to understand i want him back?
Why do chicks always expect me to text first?
why it's always me who have a crush on someone ? Why i desire to love and be loved so much ? Why can't i just love myself and that's it, let the love come naturally ?
Not as simple as it sounds.
I have feelings for someone. I want to distance myself. I want to remove my ability to easily speak to this person without them realising. So simply deleting them as a contact is not an option, nor is blocking them. I've tried hiding and muting the conversation but I'm wondering if there's something I'm missing.
The hope is after a while I'll forgot I've done it and then simply never see their name to be tempted into talking with them again.
>>17869789
Block them retard
>>17869808
Can't they see I've blocked them?
>>17869830
Yes but it won't matter since you blocked them lol
>18
>usually completely straightedge
>the other night, decide fuck it
>get some hard ass liqour, get absolutely smashed playing CSGO and a few other games
>It was beyond fun, felt light and happ
>That was a week ago
>I totally want to do it again but need to stay in control
How do you drink responsibly?
Drinking is only a problem when you overdo it
If you do it once a week, without getting shit faced to the point of vomiting, you're fine. Start feeling the need to do even more often? Skip a weekend
>>17869752
>How do you drink responsibly?
Really, drinking responsibly is having one glass of wine with dinner one night a week.
If you want to get drunk 'responsibly', you need to realise your limit. You will get to a point where you *know* you shouldn't drink any more - although sometimes you have to drink too much and suffer the consequences to learn what that limit is. The other problem with getting drunk is that the more drunk you get, the more you want to get drunk. You will want to keep drinking once you're drunk, and obviously your faculties aren't all there when you're pissed so even if you know you should stop you might just say 'fuck it' and keep going. If you get drunk you will lose control of yourself to a degree because you stop caring about consequences.
If you are going to start drinking, then it's likely that you are going to start drinking heavily - it's what people do at your age. I would recommend staying away from alcohol altogether but if you must do it then try to be sensible. I eventually found that 4 pints of beer was enough for me, but even with that I'd still sometimes have a hangover. I started drinking at 15 and stopped completely at 20.
>>17869752
just sip man, if you catch yourself seeing double, its time to stop.
are my friends assholes?
i have this group of friends that ive been pretty close with since the start of HS (im 21 now).
But the last couple of years ive become the target of jokes more frequently, most of them aren't really that offending but whenever they get a new one they literally keep making it for months, every time(literally every time i have contact with them) we talk they only make the same jokes about me and they even spam it in texts and shit. A while ago i told them that i started to really dislike it and that i wanted them to stop. They acknowledged that a little bit but theyve basically continued on most parts.
whenever i bring it up that i think its hurtful or when i genuinly get mad they just rationalize everything "being not that bad"
Am i being oversensitive or are they assholes?
hoff unrelated
That started happening to me so I just stopped talking to most of them and made new friends. Still talk to one of them, and he has since stopped talking to the majority of the old group.
>tfw when I actually enjoy being around the new friends
>tfw when I thought I had to be loyal because muh HS
>tfw when old friends are always bitching at me to come out but I'm always "busy"
>>17869813
yeah i really like (liked) most of the guys but this is driving me pretty mad tbqh. but i think it's beyond repair since all they care about is how funny they percieve themselves to be, what i think about it flies right by them.
i should probably just stop hanging out with them
>>17869828
>i should probably just stop hanging out with them
yep
time to move on !
So my girlfriend called me babe in bed.
But in texts we're still low key I've never called her any pet names and all our conversations usually go like this "hey how are you" "im fine. how are you"
We've never said anything sexual in our texts ever. Should I call her babe in a text? is she expecting me to do this before she does? Even when she asks for sex over a text she'll be like "hey can I see you tonight" but in real life she says "i want you to fuck me so hard"
I've never sent her a dirty text about how horny I am and how much I want her. But in real life she discusses this stuff with me.
Should I keep it clean?
>>17869694
>Should I keep it clean?
How could we know? It's your damn gf, you should know best what she'd prefer.
>>17869694
Girl here, call her babe before she loses interest
>overthinking the usage of "babe"
Breathe, man. If it doesn't feel natural, don't use it. To her, it probably seemed right in the context and didn't mean anything in particular.
Let's say you blew up any chance with a girl you really like.
If possible, how to recover?
KP, twitch whore
That's it.
If she likes you back... she'll give you another chance.
I fucked up like over 5+ times... she even pointed that shit out, yeah... probably not a good idea to test her patience.
My bf is mad at me and not talking to me properly because I'm currently on a one-week beach trip without him. He asked to be included but I refused, because I wanted to go with my friends, but he got really angry when I went to an overnight luau last night. He won't respond to me properly anymore and seems cold.
What do?
>>17869643
Is it a girls only trip?
>>17869663
It is in the sense that I'm staying at my friend's house, but he was suggesting we rent a beach apartment since he had tons of money and nothing to do, and I'd still get to see my friends anyway, but to be honest I just didn't want to.
>>17869643
Enjoy the rest of your holiday and once you get back home sit him down and have a proper discussion with him. Nothing you can do while you are away and he's bitchy, so make the best of your holiday and then work on it once you get back.
How do you bring yourself to have sex knowing it could potentially ruin your life?
>>17869619
How do you bring yourself to leave the house knowing it could potentially ruin your life?
>>17869619
Titties. Thats why.
What are you some religion-fag?
The point is, losing your virginity is never a big deal. It's making love, the closest you can ever be to someone. Tell you what, you're exactly the same person before and after you lose your virginity. I was surprised about that.
I was absolutely terrified to have sex, even with a condom. I was fine with being a virgin forever. I thought that once I was deflowered, I'd be devalued. But no I was exactly the same person afterwards.
So really go talk to your ob/gyn and get started on any birth control you're comfortable with, get some condoms (for backup in case you're still worried about pregnancy), get some lube, and go out there and make some love!
ITS NOT A BIG DEAL
Neat freaks!
How much of a turnoff is not having a decent living space?
I met a girl, we hit it off strongly. I'm madly in love. We connect on a deep level, we are really attracted to eachother.
Ive been at her place twice and its a pristine GEM.
Me on the other hand. I live in an apartment with 3 other people, im just done studying in about a month, and my room is messy and not impressive in any way whatsoever. The rest of the apartment is actually quite nice, the common areas etc. Its just my bedroom that is plain terrible. Its like comparing a teen to a responsible adult.
Is this one of those things women tolerate about a man, or just a huge turnoff?
I doesn't need to be perfect, but having a messy room is like having BO
Pretty much the same response
>>17869613
Huge turn off. I'd expect an adult to be able to take care of himself, including keeping living space clean enough to be habitable. Little mess every now and then ia okay, because sometimes people are busy, but living like a slop is just lazy.
>>17869621
If I took a day to do it I could make it a depressing utilitarian room that isnt the least bit messy.
How's that?
Ask a guy with no ''Real'' friends anything. Feeling lonely tonight.
Why do you have no friends?
>>17869574
How smart are you?
>>17869574
Why don't you have friends? Is there something wrong with you?
Alright, i need help.
TL;DR: How do i know if i love someone?
First of all i'm a femanon.
Ever since i'm 10 i know a girl. She is honestly a weird person, socially withdrawn and running away from her problems. She is 19 now but still won't dare to disobey her parents.
We were always close friends, though we live like 2h away from eachother. She barely ever is allowed to go and see me, but we have some traditions, like i always visit her for new year's eve, and she visits me during summer.
She was with me trough some rough times, like my father abusing me, or my parent's divorce. Our friendship went trough many men who would abuse me, as i used to be a very easy to manipulate. In the end, she would usually make me chose between our friendship and the men.
I would always chose her.
I was never close to anyone. She is the only person aside from my family i know for more than 3 years. Depsite my family being a very loving one(i was like 12 when my father got abusive, and everything was sweet up until then) i never was close to my partents or sister. I didn't shed a single tear on my grandmother's funeral - not because i was playin tough, but because i just didn't feel anything.
I was getting together with many men, my longest relationship lasting a year, the shortest ending after two weeks. Some men were abusive towards me. Sometimes i was just toying with them.
Will cont.
>>17869565
Ever since i was 15 i would dream about her once in a while. those dreams would usually be romantic to an extent, never lewd, but sometimes would wake me up crying. It happens very rarely, but it never stopped. I just ignored it.
In the country i live in, same gender relationships are not really tolerated. You can't legally marry, and the entire society will look down at you, or even you might end up being beaten for being gay. Aside from that, she was never in relationship, denying the only person who asked her for one, and then never contacting her again. I always wondered whether i am in love with her or not, and at those rare times i thought i may be, i ended up not telling her.
Sometimes i end up unable to think of any other person for weks or even months, often ending my reationships because of that. Sometimes we would have a quarrel and stop talking for a long time, but we would always go back to being friends again.
As of now i have a boyfriend. He looks very similar to her(she has a boyish look), and behaves in a similar way. Sadly, i just lost all i ever felt for him after 3 months of a relationship. I don't hate him, i just consider him a typical friend i would ocasionally play games with, and it annoys me alot when he wants me to spend time with him. I'm seeing both of them this month, and i'm not sure if i shouldn't use this as an ocassion to get this all of my chest.
Need one more, sorry, I'm messed up recently.
>>17869586
The point is, i don't know if i love her. Hell, i don't even know if i love him. All i know is this hype when hetting together with someone, but it just fades away slowly. It sometimes feels like more of a steady feeling, but it goes away eventually. It always does. the only cases where i stay with someone for a longer period is either because i gain something from it, or because i feel obligated to be with them. I don't know if my periods of feeling things for her aren't just random hype spikes. I can't afford losing a friend like her.
How do i know if i love someone? I honestly don't know. Maybe i'm autistic, i don't care. I don't think i ever loved anyone in my entire life, my family included. Or is love an unnoticable feeling? How do i know? Do i love her? Am i just using the men as a replacement of this girl?
You mistake very close friendship for romantic love, gal.
Count yourself lucky though. Not many have that.
welcome back to my adventures with this crazy bitch I found on omegle.
What is this?
>>17869551
OP I followed your thread yesterday and you're a faggot go practice your fiction on /b/
>>17869551
Why are you still going on about this? Do you get off on shitty conversations or something?
How does it feel to cheat on someone you love?
What made you do it?
How did you cope with being found out?
Did you do it again?
>>17869538
bumpity bump pls respond
>>17869538
>How does it feel to cheat on someone you love?
At the time, great, but only as great as it usually feels to get with someone when single. I guess some cheaters get a kick out of it but for me it's more of a self control issue. Regardless, afterwards, shitty
>What made you do it?
Like I said, self control. A girl comes up to me in a club, I'm fucked up, I think fuck it why not, etc., I regret it later
>How did you cope with being found out?
Funny story, she cheated on me with my friend, and he told me. I confronted her about it and she cried and apologised etc., then I felt bad that she was the only one feeling guilty so I confessed to her that I'd done the same. So we both cried and apologised and now we're over it.
>Did you do it again?
I've done it multiple times, but not since owning up to her about it
>>17869538
found out? What kind of idiot gets found out?
noobs
hi
I'm looking for gift ideas for my girlfriend
she's not picky / materialistic at all, she appreciates nice, quirky and silly things
so far I got her the tote in pic related and also a mendel's pin from etsy (she loves wes anderson's movies)
I was also thinking of buying her a nice iPhone cover, a tea bottle, a laptop pouch and a pair of those winter gloves that let you use your phone
any links to some cool products for the things above, or any additional suggestions?
>>17869526
she also likes dogs a lot
>>17869526
bump
>>17869526
Sounds like a lot of stuff for one girl who apparently isn't materialistic.
Maybe you can give her something less tangible, not sure what though.