Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2705. page

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In a LDR. Different countries. I'm 23 and we keep each other anchored. Year and a half long relationship. She revealed her age recently (before I knew her as 19). She's 15 What do I do? Continue and just keep it platonic, or leave... Immediately?
What are the laws involved with this?

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So recently this bitch has been sitting next to me in class, is the risk of aksing her out worth it?

I'm obviously not bad-looking, but since we're in the same class, it would be awkward if she said no and stopped sitting next to me. We also talked a few times if that matters.

Any other guys have similar experiences?

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Any /adv or experiences from people who have studied pyschology?

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Let me get right down to the facts. I've been in a relationship for coming on 5 years and I am feeling very restless. I'm divided on staying with this girl for the long haul, or dropping out now and moving on.

Cons:
>She doesn't really get along with my friends, and is very forced with my family.
>For two years she moved about 7 driving hours away to LA to get a masters degree. This made me feel pretty shitty.
>Lives 2 hours away right now, is being non-committal about moving to where I am
>I don't want to leave behind all my friends and family to move where she is
>Isn't really interested in my hobbies

Pros:
>We have a lot of trust built up
>She is fairly pretty
>She is smart
>Tries to please me sexually, but isnt very sexual or good in bed

I'm so divided on this issue. I feel like if I were to leave her, I might as well walk up and hack her arm off. The thought of hurting her and then throwing her to the wolves gives me a feeling of dread and horror in the pit of my stomach,

But I feel myself longing for something new. I made a fake ok cupid just so I could see what was out there and have that feeling of newness.

fuk do i do?

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For as long as I can remember (since 5 years old) I have been experiencing images of violence and brutality against people, most of whom are strangers. Normally, each episode begins when I enter a situation which I have had a bad experience in, e.g. locker room, around "chaddy" people, etc. Then, I would imagine that there is some sort of trigger to my violence in order to make it justified, e.g. humiliating action, harassment. This is followed by me bludgeoning them, slicing their tendons one by one, digging out their eyes, actions to that degree. This lasts for a few minutes until i snap out of it or I get interrupted.

I uber socially autistic, so my relationship with people has either been neutral or cold or filled with dislike and hate. This is a concern since my country has compulsory conscription and I am due to be conscripted. The last time I held a gun I was actually considering killing one filthy fat fuck which I really hated. Does anyone have any idea what is wrong with me, or is this actually normal among many people?

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My current gf told me a few weeks into dating that she was molested as a kid, because of this she has serious intimacy issues. Does not like to cuddle, hug, barely even kisses me. Im quite an affectionate person so when i go for a kiss and she pulls away it feels pretty rough.

On top of this, she told me a couple of weeks ago that she might be asexual and has no sex drive at all. Also told me she's pretty much only having sex with me so i don't leave her like her other boyfriends have for not putting out.

I told her I wanted to make it work when she told me all this stuff but I'm not sure im capable of keeping this relationship going. I'm already getting stressed out and snapping at her.

I feel like a dick for wanting to end things with her because of this shit that isn't her fault but I don't think I can continue to date someone with no interest in the physical aspects of a relationship.

Should I try and work at it? I don't want to hurt her, it sounds like her lack of sex drive has caused her previous boyfriends to leave/cheat on her and her confidence has taken a hit. Is their a way to even end it without being another one of those guys?

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I feel stuck. I'm married and trying to do my best to be a good wife. I'm supportive of my spouse transitioning from MtF, I show nothing but love, stuff in common and always doing what I can to cheer her up/going out when she asks so she never has to.. I go outta my way to get her whatever she needs or wants. I try to be interested in everything she likes or does, often feeling bad for taking any time to do anything I like for myself for a change because I am not doing what she approves of.

Yet, it's like I can never be good enough. It's always "Maybe if you were fit then we could do this." "Why can't you have a personality like hers (her ex who she dated online)" "I bonded with her. I loved her personality and parts about her" "Why can't you be my dream girl?" "Why do you do this?" "You fucked up because you decided to take time to play a game for a bit instead of doing voice training with me. Now I am upset with you..even if I was busy doing my own thing before you decided to do your own thing. You should've taken initiative." "You didn't check the food at the fast food joint?! Just because they reeated order back correctly doesn't mean shit! I'm not touching the food til you go back up there! I don't care if it's 19 miles away! Get it fixed!"

I literally try to be supportive..I try and help. I do whatever I can to ease burden on her atm with stress going on in her life.. But this constant remonder of how I am not this ghost of an ex, how I suck because I am not her ex..this constant bringing me down because I am not immediately fit yet..It's tearing me up and frankly makes me wanna vanish. It's really mentally hurting me and makes me feel like a bad excuse of a human being.

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It turns out she's fairly obsessed with her weight, but not in the normal way. My gf secretly wants to be a "feedee" (A feedee, for those as in the dark as i was a few hours ago, is someone who is sexually aroused by being fattened up, usually to the point of morbid obesity). I'm struggling to comprehend this. I once made a teasing comment about her gaining a couple of pounds and she went absolutely berserk, so this is the last thing i expected.

This goes back years, it seems to have started in 2013, with lots of strange youtube videos chronicling womens weight gain, it then moves on to searches like "Why am i obsessed with becoming 12stone"(168lbs / 76kg) before advancing on to her apparently keeping a good eye on her daily calorie intake and how much she needs to eat to “gain a lot of weight”.

It seems she gave it a good go in 2014/15 (explains some stretchmarks) but has always been a healthy and reasonable weight since we met. I've also never seen any pictures of her overweight. That said, she is still regularly searching these terms and watching those kinds of videos.

I should mention, i have no desire for her to gain any weight, i find obesity extremely unattractive and couldn't stand to watch her slowly kill herself in such a way. Though it seems she is struggling with this (The desire to gain weight vs the social consequences) and I would like to support her.

How do I approach this? Should I just tell her I stumbled on it and offer some support? Should I keep my mouth shut? I’m not great at manipulating people so trying to get her to fess up covertly isn’t really an option.

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getting married in a few weeks and a closet gay since high school. i love my fiance but a part of me wants to scream "I ALSO LIKE GIRLS!' during our vows

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not sure where i should post this but i figured here because i might actually get some decent advice. say you had like 10,000 dollars to spend exclusively on ways to improve your mental well being. how would you go about spending it so that once its all gone you're in a better place than you were before? I don't see the point in ending my life when i could spend this money then end my life if it doesn't work.

- have highschool diploma
- almost finished college dropped out with like 4 credits left because of severe depression in my last semester.
- i've gotten laid a decent amount so i don't think a hooker would help me get out of my funk, especially since it doesn't seem worth it. admittedly its been a while since i've gotten laid.

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My friend is the same age and gender (Male, 20) as myself. While drinking we kissed and essentially massaged each others upper half. He claimed it was a good night and about 8 hours after that it was a mistake and to forget it through a text message. Anyhow, I have always felt a desire to hold him in my arms. I find myself mainly attracted to women but this friendship is a lot more full on to me than what I have ever even had with anybody else. I have no desire for a sexual relationship but I want something where we can secretly hug, maybe kiss if he wants, etc. I do, however want to see his penis out of curiosity and have felt the want to grab at it. But I see that as more of a curiosity thing.

Anyway, we recently had another night. Well many of them but nothing ever happens. So when I drink I basically massage his scalp, hug him and try to sleep as close to him as possible. To put it bluntly, he knows I have had feelings for him for a while and I believe that he knows that they have grown even more these past few months. I am wondering if it is worth a shot at telling him how I feel. I'll say that it would not affect our friendship because we are tight as fuck, been through a lot and I also consider that we have been through worse times than simple arguments and absolute hatred. Point is, I don't think me coming out in a way to him would affect us at all. I would have to ask though, if I am to tell him. When, where and what should I say? I'll take a guess at drunk.

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Person A: I'm trying to make a different style of YouTube video.
Person B: Oh so you're going to be one of those annoying YouTube personalities?
Person A: Well I was hoping to build a more intellectual audience who will debate in the comment section.
Person B: You realise how fucking pretentious that sounds?

Which one's the asshole?
Person A with their pretentious demeanor
Person B with their overt attitude

Who actually fucking cares?

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what is the most considerate way to come clear to my bf about not having been completely honest with him?

i'm pretty insecure and avoidant and i have been keeping up some act around people all my life. i slowly try to stop that behaviour but it will inevitably have consequences for the relationship between my bf and me.
namely sex.
i have not once rejected his sexual advances and i really need to learn to say no if i don't feel like having sex at all. i also feel like he might think something's wrong if i start to say no out of the blue so i guess i'll have to explain my sudden change in behaviour. but how do i do that?

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One of my friends says he has "lesbian envy". I asked him to explain more in detail and he wouldn't/couldn't.

I'm gay and basically if I'm ever around my girlfriend and him at the same time he starts getting all pissy, huffy, and abrasive. It sucks because I'm tired of having to choose between not going to social gatherings or my girlfriend. I can tell my other friends are getting tired of his behavior but we've all known each other for a long time.

The fuck do I do?
Also is this a common thing? It seems fucking retarded.