Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2535. page

>>18044059
I felt like I had to tell her about all the shit in case I died. She was extremely sad. She didn't deserve this at all /adv/...

After I came back, we had long talks about the relationship because the long distance had ruined some things. A lot of girls had told her bold face lies about me trying to get with them, flirting with them while me and her were together and other ridiculous stuff she didn't believe. I laughed, thinking what the fuck is wrong with these dumb bitches. Most of them were girls that I had flirted with WAY before I saw her, to which they had replied "no way" only to stalk me at parties trying to get me to fuck them later on.

We started living together, but I was still thinking its too good to be true. She was wonderful in all ways. We had our disagreements, but it was beautiful nonetheless.

Now, long story made a little shorter: I had to go across the country to my family for Christmas. At which time she had MAJOR problems in her family, and I couldn't pay attention to her needs at all. I was on the phone with her, but ultimately told her to wait for me to get back so we can talk about it. She was crying all the time and I couldn't be with the family, so I started yelling at her for petty shit so she'd hang up and I could deal with it later. She was so distorted by the family thing that she had packed my shit while I was away and told me she had no feelings towards me.

Next post wraps things up, please bear with me

>>18044078
When I got back to pick my shit up I hated her for what she'd done. I did believe she had no feelings towards me anymore and I couldn't take it. Remember I said I was cool? All that evaporated and I was sure she had found someone else. It was easier to think she was a manipulative bitch than to realize my walls had been too high for her to climb - because I though she was too good to be true through this entire time, which made me not give 100% into the relationship. I was insecure, and was afraid of her dumping me which ironically made her do it.

I was on my own, and found a new apartment. I resented the world, and hated everyone around me. I made a story about how she had always cheated on me and was being manipulative. I told myself this all day until I started believing it. At night, I remembered all the good things and cried until I fell asleep only to dream about her and wake up just as angry and delusional about what she had done.

A stranger (small town, remember?) told me that she had moved in with a guy, and that they had planned this a while BEFORE Christmas. All my hateful thoughts had come true, and I didn't wait to call her a cheating whore and every other name in the book. I told people how she had manipulated me in order to find someone else to pay the rent - that she had no fucking feelings. It was easier to think that, than anything else so I went with it. Suddenly everyone in town knew she was a cheating bitch that kicked me out for another guy.

Truth was: she never moved in with anyone. She had talked to said guy after we broke up, but nothing serious. The stranger that told me this, actually had problems with the guy and wanted someone to make his life hell.

Dear /adv/, I scorned a woman that loved me for the shit that I was. She may never love me again, but I will love her for the rest of my time on this earth. I really want to fix this, I was at my weakest and it was easier to jump to conclusions (one more)

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>>18044127
easier to jump to conclusions than see the bigger picture. Truth was, she had ALWAYS loved me, and I always loved her. I was too scared to show her because I felt that something would happen one day and I'd have to take my life, as no one has ever loved me like that before.

She hates me now because I talked all that shit, and rightfully so. The whole town has made up their mind about the wildest shit, and even worse than what I portrayed.

I don't know what to do. Since day one, the world has been against us, and now it seems like the fucking world won. I really want to make it up to her, not for her to take me back but for her to know how much I really loved her. Because I never showed her that.

How do I do that? I know I fucked up, and I expect you to call me out on it, but at least give me a direction of what to do. As said, not to get her back but for her to know how much I loved her because I never really showed her.

You're comparing yourself to people with 15 years of experience. Try getting a studio job first to get some experience.

Current CompSci student.

I suggest downloading PDF's of languages like C++ and doing everything in the book. You don't need a teacher for this at all. After you know a few languages or know one really well, try freelancing again so you can get some real experience.

>>18044027
Alright I will see about the pirated books, but I don't think I'll be able to land a job without a degree or a pleasant github profile (Which is currently empty). I do appreciate the help, thank you!

>>18043949

ive produced several projects, various types. live action, animation, comics, etc.

the best thing you can do for yourself is start with a limited story and produce it on your own.

by limited story i mean, have a point A, have a point Z, and get there in just enough steps to make it a full story. if you're planning to publish more than 12 issues to tell your story, you are probably going to fail.

12 issues makes it easy to get ahead, stay ahead, and keep the story concise enough that people can enjoy the whole thing.

THEN, if people like it, you can produce a second story arc, and perhaps a bigger one, etc.

but if you are going to insist that you have no stories that can be told in 12 issues than you are shooting yourself in the foot. so many of my former calssmates never produced anything cuz they kept saying

>oh :) my ideas are too epic, they need like three movies to tell them all, its gotta be a big budget studio franchise

lo and behold they do nothing.

if you can't draw, look around for artists. there are artists who post here frequently about how they love to draw and want a comic but can't write. there you go, write it for them.

even if you and your friend take out a loan for 6000 dollars each, you could pay your artists 1000 for each issue, switching them out as needed. you might not make that money back but if producing means a lot to you, its worth it. im 8000 dollars in debt over my last web series.

>>18043985
>>18043985
First of all, thanks for the answer it's really appreciated. I kinda "draw", I just have to train to actually be a good artist

>by limited story i mean, have a point A, have a point Z, and get there in just enough steps to make it a full story. if you're planning to publish more than 12 issues to tell your story, you are probably going to fail.
We actually know this and we have some One Shots ideas. The thing is we made a "world" so we have multiple story.
We had the idea to start with a one shot in order to "introduce" our world, but we aren't sure about the comic book format. is it really a good idea for a first shot ?
>12 issues makes it easy to get ahead, stay ahead, and keep the story concise enough that people can enjoy the whole thing.
I completly agree with this, and eve if we have long stories I think none of them exceeds 12 issues. If it's the case, even if I don't think so, they aren't the ones we'll work on at first, because I prefer to fail one shots than huge series.

I'm really curious about your work, if that doesn't annoy you I'ld like to give it a little look if you have some names.

>>18043949
I really recommend finding a good concept artist who is willing to work with you.

Watch an entire documentary on insects

I recommend Life in the Undergrowth

also those things are harmless, I have Arizona Bark Scorpions in my house, step up

house centipedes may be creepy looking but they are literally incapable of harming you in any way

>>18044002
This isn't true. They absolutely are capable of biting humans, it's just very rare. Their mouths are on the underside of their body so they have to be crawling on you to bite. Anyways, I used to live in a massive, 140 year old house and these things were absolutely everywhere. I'd usually see at least one a day, probably the same ones repeatedly as they were very large, and they live to be pretty old for insects. I never bothered them and they never bothered me. They eat bedbugs and other pest insects so i let them live for that reason. Not sure how this helps OP but, it's false to claim they are 100% harmless.

>>18043540
Once you reflect on it in 20 years.

>>18043540

by asking her out. if she says yes, she likes you. if she doesn't say yes, she doesn't like you.

If she tries to be close to you specifically (= hangs around with you), and writes you messages and shit.

>>18043294
if you bought the car new, why the fuck didn't you take care of it? Lemme guess, you either
a) never changed the oil and it all burned off
b) took it to a $20 oil change place, and they either forgot to tighten the oil drain bolt, or forgot to put oil in it altogether

I'd say replace it engine since you've never had it in an accident, and keep it.

>>18043302
I second this. Replace engine and just keep driving it.

You aren't going to get shit selling it as is because there is literally no demand for that vehicle and after you fix it you'll probably barely get anything back after paying for said repairs.

Alternatively, sell it as is for little to nothing, it's a roller, take the loss and buy a "new" car and take care of it this time.

>>18043302
>>18043314
>>18043302
i had the oil changed every 3k miles like clockwork since the day i bought it. i love this car. the oil filter came off on the highway and i'm too stupid to realize the little red light that came on meant "stop this car immediately you fucking idiot" and not "take care of this in ten minutes when you get home."

I listed in on craigslist without a price and got about 10 emails with local numbers asking how much I was interested in selling it for.

I get that it sounds pretty dumb, but I really did love and care very much for this car, and while I'm not against fixing it, it seems like for that much money, I'm better off just buying something newer.

Once again, I appreciate the feedback.

>>18043261
My mum has a plethora of mental health issues and her spine is going to shit. Anything I do for her is never enough and I question why I came back here every day.

I like my parents

Dad left my mother, brother who has autism and I before we were born. My mother was never ready to raise 2 boys and 1 with a mental disability. A single parent raising 2 boys all by herself is a hard task and during adolescence I wanted to call him to tell him i wish he was dead but as i grew older and became an adult i realized it wasn't all my mother's fault. I could hate her for "not trying" to raise me right only giving me small hints of advice such as "stay in school" or "do unto others as you would like them to do to you" but that would be hypocritical of me. Plus every teacher i had during my childhood turned a blind eye and never took the time to help me with my studies so in a sense the cards i have been dealt have always seemed more like a punishment than a chore.

Can't say I want to keep moving forward but I'm doing it... It just hurts to know my past will always be something to hate rather than appreciate.

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(2/2)

Recently, I've been dealing with those feelings by spotting and targetting those sources. Sometimes as soon as I have a disastrous interaction, I'll pick my phone and write down the parts of the encounter that made me feel like shit, so later I can lucidly reflect on them. By now the list is numerous, covering everything from the way I speak to my knowledge of my own city's streets and places, to TV shows I might want to check if I want to have something to talk to people about. I also started writting down things people do that I think make them seem confident, likeable, etc, and I try to mirror them.

My question is: is this a fucking waste of time? Has anyone succeeded in getting better through a similar method? If not, what do you recommend?

>>18043219

>For example, they can talk about experiences with something that you're not experienced in.

The social red-pill is that you don't actually have to have anything to offer to get people to like you. If you just listen to them, seem interested and ask questions, they will love you.

Lurk moar

It might have something to do with the fact that you are a man, op.

>>18043090
through dick, unity

>>18043111
I wish I was it would make my life much easier.

Usually the procedure for warts is burning them off (not cutting) with liquid nitrogen. Ive had this done, it happens at the GP.

Have you gone to your doctor about it?

I would cut down mine until it hurt too much to keep going, then put a bit of cotton soaked in apple cider vinegar and leave it till the stuff dried. The vinegar fucking hurts but that's the only way I found that worked the best.

I had a bunch when I was a kid.

I just cut the surface off with nail clippers every couple days and they eventually went away.

Mine broke up with me a few years ago. I deleted her on all social stuff and I didn't talk to her or have any contact for a long, long time. Then out of the blue she reached out and now I'm moving in with her. Shit's weird.

>>18042992

Wow. Tell us more?

I split with my ex over 3 years ago. Still love her pretty much.

I dont talk to any of them. I try to keep as far away as possible, 2 of them still text or call me out the blue once or twice during the year.

I never miss any of them, they've all made my quality of life miserable and always made me feel like i was in a mental cage, watching my steps not to step on egg shells, made me too careful about my interactions with other people. Frankly im happy being single with no kids coming close to the age of 30.

It's not easy to be cruel and cunning.
You need to have a lack of empathy and most people who are like this end up in jail, a few of the worst and most intellegent psycopaths go unnoticed and becomme bosses and politicans and so on.

>>18042965
I take some of my advice from School of Life. Of course, you can't take any advice completely whole, but hearing out other opinions is a good way to shape your thinking.

>>18042965
i love the school of life. i really enjoyed this one video about how our tendency to let infants rage without taking it personally should be applied to adults

idk how sound it is, but the writers have some cool ideas

I'm in an incredibly similar situation. I try coping by trying to focus on other aspects of my life and remembering she will never be with me. In your case do you think you have a shot with her? if so don't you want to be with her?

>>18042955

I think I may have a shot, kinda, but aftere excessive consideration, I don't want to pursue it. I'm kind of an emotional conduit and she is extremely expressive and sensitive, which would destroy me. I've also picked up on some ideas she olds that I firmly disagree with, which would be fine if we could just sit and discuss them, but I think any such talk would turn into a one-sided shitfest and I'm not gonna bring that shit into my life.

Also she has some legit animosity with my closest friend and he's a true asshole, which is a bunch more potential for drama I don't have the patience or emotional fortitude to deal with.

Unfortunately all these reasonable ideas about why to avoid this relationship don't make me want to fuck her any less, and my internal hopeless romantic keeps popping his head up to get crushed by wave after wave of shit feels. It's like a Pavlovian response.

>>18042955
>remembering she will never be with me.

I think my whole issue is that I can't hold firmly onto this anymore because I recognise that it is irrational, and she gave me some pretty strong hints the last time we hung out with some friends.

Last night she invited me to the same bar out of the blue, and I fortunately had other plans, but it's been ruining my mind and my mood. Worse, if she just straight up goes for it, I'm pretty certain I'll cave, and it'll all be downhill from there.

>>18042674
Could you resent him because you wish people treated you like that? Thats the most likely scenario from my pov. And being loud is a sign of confidence so maybe thats whay the girls are attracted to. Who knows Mayne

>he's smiling and being fun all day
>I don't get why people like him

did you think people preferred bitter basement dwellers ?

>>18042674
> All the hot girls like him, laugh at everything he says and touch him

They're not laughing with him they're laughing at him

>she's super introverted, hates crowds
>works at a club
Eh, sounds about right. I've know a few people like that.

Ask her out

>>18040495
>plays nintendo
no hope for her

but more seriously
>>18040571