Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2284. page

Yeah, you can absolutely do a "consultation." In some places they don't even charge extra for it if you end up getting your hair done there.

>>18105348

You can do that, yes. However, setting some limits like how long you'd like it to be is a good idea. Usually if you ask for them to cut it how they want they cut something safe and what people tend to like, so if you want something "trendy" then bring a pic or something of the type of haircut you want.

Just save $20 and cut your own hair senpai

Just like lay down in park and forget about the world.

>>18105298

Just become a vagabond and hike the country..

no money. no transport. and living in the uk. Currently looking into hostels. but with no money or support its a no go, and soon with them scrapping housing benefits im stuck

>>18105187
To be very clear, I'm having sexual about the friends. WTF is wrong with me?

Maybe...

They're just thoughts, don't be mad. We all get them.

Try harder to not look at their body and just their eyes.

Then end up noticing how beautiful their eyes are and resist urges to mention so.

I would avoid it if you're not asian

Otherwise go for it

>>18105146
I'm korean and it would greatly improve my job prospects in EU but I'll be scarred for life. It's not even tattoo tier, I'll never be able to go back if it ever gets bad.

>>18105157
you cant lose

gook eyes are disgusting

do the bleph and never look back

How about you don't let what other people do define you?

Who gives a fuck if the majority of faggots want to be complete sluts, that doesn't mean the rest of us can't be normal.

>when I can't define an actual moral reason to be more prudent
Opportunity cost.

This isn't really down for discussion, because no one here knows your innermost deepest emotions but you. It's part of your personality to yearn for genuine romantic affection and there's nothing wrong with that. You don't have to go and fuck a load of dudes just because you perceive it as necessary to be part of a nebulous culture broadly defined by gender and sexuality. You will just regret it.

If you read about gay culture in the 80s, the climate of promiscuity grew hand-in-hand with cultural and political isolation, gay kids got drawn into it because it was like a family when no one else would accept them, but lets be honest here, the gay scene is breaking apart because homosexuality is finally getting equal rights and mainstream acceptance in our society - the one thing that held the gay community together, political activitism, is no longer so important - people are realising that they can be gay and also an individual.

On one hand, it's sad that a sub-culture is dying off, but on the other it means there will be more gay people like you who don't feel compelled to stay part of the gay scene just to stave off loneliness.

>>18105074
Wow. You're asking something very specific on a non-general discussion board. I wonder if we'll get someone to answer. I'm interested in it too.

I haven't had Lasik but I've had PRK. It's pretty cool. Sometimes I wake up with excruciating eye pain though. I think Lasik is actually supposed to be better in that regard.

>>18105087
But i readed a lot of negative stuff in general about operations to the eye via laser ;/

>>>/b/

>>18105046
reddit :^)

>>18105054
I've just come from that place.

I don't intend on going back.

>falling for the ADHD meme

>>18105036
"hey doc I was wondering if I could take one of those ADHD or learning disability tests"

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>>18105002
If you are depressed, you do not have everything in life.

You lack true happiness.

Consider the things that make you laugh on short term. Think about why and how it makes you feel the way it does. You are only 18 terran years old. I do not mean that condescending, but you still have so much time left.

From now on, focus on the things that do make your happy. Therein lies the seed of motivation.
Depression is but a byproduct of human imagination. That doesn't make the hurt any less real, but knowing this, you can overrule it.

You are above average intelligence, you are good looking and you have a lot of good qualities that will help you onwards in life. Am I right that you are sometimes hesitant to make a first step towards something new? And that you may be lacking motivation, but when you do have that motivation, you are hindered by perfectionism at times?

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>have everything in life
But none of what you want, apparently. Understand the difference.

>but I dont have motivation and am constantly depressed
>dont have suicidal thoughts though
Atypical depression. The advice is obvious: treat yourself. Fortunately for you it's very simple. For reference, I was depressed for 14 years without knowing it and after answering a medical questionnaire and getting results I treated myself out of it in less than a month and I'm now running successfully self employed, have lifting as a hobby, get talked to by girls and plenty more great changes and happy things.

I'll let you in on the boring secret that everyone likes to ignore- the preventative treatment and cure for depression are exactly the same:

>Regular exercise
>Regular sunshine (at least an hour per day)
>Regular social interaction with peers
>Good diet (usually sugar and processed foods are the leading cause of dietary induced depression)
>Good sleep

Regular altruism and meditation also both help but those fall under the areas above.

Make small changes and stay committed, like anything in life it's a simple matter of slogging through the boring standard stuff til you make small changes that add up to a better life.

Doing a job you hate when you don't need to is going full retard.

Equally, so is trying to make a living teaching Latin. But if there's a job out then go get it.

I quit a job I hated and then had to go live on welfare for quite a while. 0 regrets. Frankly, I'd rather live on the fucking street than do another day of that job. Leaving a shitty situation is almost never a bad idea.

>>18104975
I just felt like maybe I could make a career out of this place, but it feels like my department gets way the fuck more work than any other department. I got a lot of real world experience and business experience which is great but I'm just so fucking wiped 24/7 because I keep getting fucking yelled at and have over 100 conversations a day with different people about different problems. I don't want to work dead-end jobs but I just FUCKING HATE MY LIFE. I FUCKING HATE LIVING LIKE THIS and I FUCKING HATE THAT MY FAMILY IS THE ONLY THING I HAVE AND THEY'RE NOT SUPPORTIVE OF ME NO MATTER WHAT THE FUCK I DO.

Seriously half the time I just want to fucking kill myself because I am suffering 24/7 and I try to tell people and all they say is "yeah it's hard for everyone"

Well I didn't use to suffer this bad before but if that's life all the time then fuck it I'm out.

>>18104965
bump

Get a fucking car and go to the fun job.

>>18104967
this. it will be worth it if it feels like a fun place to work.

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>>18104957
Go for option one. Public transport will be heretical at first, but a good job will make up for it.
The next step would be either to procure your own means of transport. or move closer to work.

You can do it, anon.

>>18104935
Continued:

>Try a mature conversation again abuot that I feel dreadful if I care about someone and that person does not even have the time to send a small message back (as she completely ignored me) and that I am confused she just 'wants space' for no reason as things were going great between us in the last weeks.
>She says that "We are humans, sometimes we just have to accept the bahavior of the other person"
>Bullshit detector goes off in my head say to her "Yes of course you sometimes have to accept behavior, but only when you know the reason. I cant just take frustration and anger from you if I do not know what is going on."
>She constantly assumes that I want to "just feel better about myself", "give her superficial solutions to her problems", etc. aka she assumes I want to bring her down and make myself feel good.
>Hurts me a lot that she thinks I am so cynical and I am not doing this with a true and loving heart for her. The tears are welling behing my eyes (yes, they are, I am also just a guy in love and not some badass that does not give a shit. Call me a faggot, I dont care).
>Says skyping with me makes always makes her feel bad.
>Cant hold back tears, so I quickly hang up
>Have a good cry and realise I am exhausted and sad, but that I still really love her and wonder why she thinks I shallow and purposefully trying to hurt or suffocate her. Yet my behavior has not really changed since the last few weeks.

Guys, what should I do? Can any femanons give me a reason for this behavoir?

>Inb4: She is cheating.
Maybe, but probably not (She still lives with her mother and her father and mother and on her ass plus I know her friends and she has expressed her hate for cheating. In addition we agreed we should break up if we are really starting to loose attraction for eachother).

she doesn't want space for no reason, she wants space because she wants space

not grasping this is the crux of your issue

>>18104955
>Doing things for the sake of doing things
?

>>18104916
Yeah fuck her off

>>18104924
Thread closed

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>>18104909
Be strong Anon. Be strong for the Emperor.

Tackle your problems one at a time.Careers do not exist anymore in 2017. Take a job you are qualified to do, and do it. Money will increase if you save up. Meeting new people at work might be uncomfortable at first, but it will be beneficial in the long run. Colleagues can turn into fast friends. You don't 'suffer' from BPD and ADHD, you just deal with it in your life. Give it a place, know yourself.

Lastly, turn the energy of your anger into something productive. Fuck everything trying to take you down. Fuck obstacles. Show them who's boss. Get that job, excell in it like I know you will. You're above average intelligence. Use that.
Of course it will be hard. Very fucking hard. But you've faced hard times before, and you have experience in dealing with it.

Remember, every action requires steps taken. Every journey begins with but a single step. Take that step.

Like a ship tossed around in the hig waters, everything creaking, stuff flying around, waves rolling over the deck -- and you are the only one that can tend to it, because noone else is here.

Draw a line between You and not You. Wave of emotions comes -- that is not me, it's my BPD. It will interfere with my thinking but it is not a part of me, it is a part of my brain that is somehow different. Your ship is a wild beast.

Can you hold any bearing in these circumstances? Make your ship the journey -- how do the waves form? How does the movement of the sail translate into the behavior of the ship? Why do I get sad all the time?
Get to know yourself better. Only then can you head somewhere. And the path will unravel in the process of studying -- the ship will tell you where it wants to go.

Sometimes I envy the simplicity that comes with religion. And the cringe you can put here on 4chan

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>>18104909
I've got you OP.
Go to College, that is where you find yourself and learn about the world/make connections you would have never made. I can safely say college is the best bet for people who don't want to pursue a trade and have no idea what they want to do. You'll make friends, some enemies and meet people who will change your life. The only thing I don't recommend you do there is take any gender studies/feminism courses, because that is a recent phenomenon that is more politically driven/dogmatic than expanding your mind. Go all out on everything else there.

As for the agnosticism and bisexuality, don't worry so much about it. When I was younger I was agnostic and I think that is healthy/normal in your early 20's to be that way. Same with bisexuality. We're all bisexual to a certain extent, nothing is black and white. It's when you attempt to put a label/box around yourself that you suffer. Homosexual thoughts are completely normal/natural; exclusively identifying with a sexual preference is a very recent phenomenon that started literally less than 100 years ago, which is so extremely recent in the context of humanity. You're fine just how you are.

BPD goes away as you get older, I used to suffer from that and no longer do. ADHD and Sadistic you might want to see a therapist for, which you can get if you go to College. Sorry to hear you've been abused, I have as well and you'd be surprised how many people have. It's unfortunately not uncommon nowadays to hear of someone going through some sort of trauma/abuse growing up.

Good luck OP, a lot of us are in the fight together, but it's what shapes us into people.

>>18104890
He's dismissive because you're Australian and you aren't good enough

>>18104926
Wanker

bit too much i'd say but who knows? she may take it well. you know anything about her?