Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 228. page

ask about the concert

>>18689066
>when I see her tomorrow should I just act like I never texted her or act like I had forgotten about texting her.

Why act? Was the text important? Do you really need to bring it up?

>>18689072
yeah obviously that's what imma do when I see her :)

should I ever bring up texting her or just act like I forgot I had texted her

>>18689045
That you're a pedophile

>>18689045
You're reading too much into things, while you give away drugs lol. Also >>18689053

Yeah, so don't date underage girls.

>>18688985
One important detail as to my QUESTION:

I just want some advice on how to take this all in. I've been looking the other way, see? Almost developed some martyr syndrome. I don't know if I should be angry, productive, listless, suicidal, there's something bubbling underneath. I have always had anger problems. I feel it coming back.

"Now that I think about it, I had all these problems like ________ and if they were to be all the cause of my parents, well I'll fucking..." etc etc.
^ I don't want to go that route.

But I do want to understand who I am better. What does being silenced mean for me?

>>18688985
Toughen up and bant right back at them.

Case 1.
They stop talking to you
>oh no what will you eeeeeever do
Case 2.
They keep abusing you
>more proof you need to fuck off
Case 3.
They confront you about it, you tell them they're treating you way worse, they reject that so you keep making your point, they see it and slowly make efforts to change
>good times
Case 4.
They tell you to pay attention and they're not bantin, you're doing something wrong
>oh shit, take responsability and fix it

They might just not like you which I'm sure happens and it will hurt but the good news is you'll

Bonus 1.
Be familiar with abuse and will recognize it from now on thus not build any kind of relationship (familiar, amical, romantic) with these people
>yay quality
Bonus 2.
Build new relationships where you're loved and supported
>yay more quality

Where you from originally btw? I'm eastern european and over here abuse is love (so the soviets taught us when their empire raped pillaged and enslaved). So it might just be cultural.

>>18689038
korean here. totally agree with the abuse is love, I am not against believing that either. It's just... Idk I think I was lacking something as a kid. The abuse is love, I see it in many families, but I think it was somewhat out of place for my situation, because I was walking on eggshells all the time. My parents had many periods of extreme hatefulness, they are very individual people and do not see the harm in unleashing their hatred on the other with whomever watching. They are quick to give up, depressive people, think people are constantly against them. I don't know how the two of them met to be fucking honest

Ok... now that I have vented in FULL digression,

I very much like your case studies. I agree, there is no real harm in talking back. They are adults and probably expect their own medicine all the time, or so I'm choosing to believe.

The most important thing you said to me was becoming familiar with abuse. In my adolescece I made a couple of close bonds with other girls, and I hurt them unknowingly in many subtle ways. The most painful thing is all of them, for whatever reason, telling me at the end (breakup) that they never could relax around me. It fucking destroyed me, because I realized I couldn't ever relax around my parents. I just copied their behavior and expected to build a castle out of it. Shame on me.

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If you're a chick, it's over.

>>18688970
I'm a dude

>>18688970
You losers are always discouraging and it's fucking pathetic

>>18688967
Perfect your craft and yes, embarrass yourself several times, maybe over the course of a few years

For example, Louie CK wasn't exactly funny until he divorced, maybe 10 years into his career - I think it involved getting w0ke. The most popular form of comedy at the moment involves being oddly frank and aware of the way things are, but you can take any approach you feel is right.

He wasn't hilarious his first ten years, but he was entertaining for what it's worth

Before doing anything extreme, I'd attempt every other route beforehand.

Try new looks, perhaps seek psychological help. I'm not guarenting it will work, but it may save you from spending a heavy sum on something that might not help.

I've seen alot of people with low self esteem and a sense of self hatred at their apperance go down the plastic surgery route and they often get addicted.

>>18688919
>be op
>unhappy because of the way I look
>decide that I'll get plastic surgery
>gets surgery
>looks so amazing
>happy with way I look
>2 weeks later
>I'm not happy anymore
>op kills himself

Have you ever wondered why the suicide rate is so high in the trans community?
It's cause they think that they're gonna be happy once they switch genders

So they switch and they're still not happy

Then push comes to shove and they eat a bullet


Don't get this surgery, seriously unless you have a deformed face and you're correcting it you need to not do this

Like if you get into a relationship after the surgery you need to ask yourself, would they date me if I didn't have this?

If the answer is yes then what was the point of the surgery
If the answer is no then they aren't worth it

Be smart
Don't do this

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>>18688954
I appreciate your concern, but I have deficient facial bones, and it's really bothering me. I could try psychotherapy, but I'd end up on pills probably which I don't want, since I have a friend who was depressed and the pills made him an unfeeling robot basically.

>>18689044
I get what you're saying, but there's a huge difference between being mentally ill and wanting to cut your dick off, and something I can visualize and feel under my hands in a mirror.

Thing is, I'm not ugly, I'm just a bit under average due to bad facial growth during childhood, and have got a bit of a melted face look going on since no adequate bone support which is easily solvable by surgery.

Trying to play it out smart, get the money and choose the best surgeon I can find with lots of good results under his belt.

We both know it's hard as shit to find someone if you're not good looking, I'm not trying to look like a model after the surgery, I just want to fix what's wrong without going overboard and ending up deformed.

>pic related not me, but similar face structure. easily treatable by surgery, eyes won't look like they melted and so on. But I just lack the funds in the first place.

>>18688704
What do you think people with jobs do with their dogs?

>>18688704
Nope, you gotta be with the dog all the time.
All sarcasm aside, unless it's a puppy or it isn't house trained, you can leave it be if you take care of it's needs first.

>>18688704
Did you honestly think you had to literally watch the dong 24/7 lol.

stop caring about what others think of you, even better if you can stop caring about others completely.

>>18688705
Are you suggesting that he should become extremely autistic?

>>18688721
that's one way to put it, most legit autists i've known do things they like instead of what's popular at the time

>>18688685
You change your consideration.

>>18688685

Did you do something to ruin the friendship?

You probably deserve it. What did YOU do to deserve it? That's the question here.

>>18688678
Tell them to fuck off.

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>>18688678
Go on the offensive and dump her

>>18688678
You did nothing wrong. This will probably blow over.

But maybe they see you as "one of the family" might be a good sign if you plan to marry the girl.

How long have you been dating?

>>18688674
Bump

>>18688674
>>>/biz/

>>18688674
camming

Why do you think anyone here would know her better than you?
If even you don't know what's wrong: talk to her about it and ask her

>>18688387
She is just shy. Ask her on more dates and do handholding first so she can get used to you.

>>18688426
I don't want to complain so early in a (what's supposed to be a) relationship. I want her to make a move because I made enough moves already. And I posted here because I need help to not go insane waiting for her move.

>>18688431
How shy can she be though? She's waaaaay more sociable than me, and that's a fact. Is there a chance she likes me so much that she's on so many levels of anxiety when she's with me?

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>>18688386
>treating her as queen
Pic related. You dont court lady by being a doormat. It is the same fail as loving somebody unconditionally.

Also some relationships were never meant to be. You were probably her rebound.

>>18688399
the thing is she treated me like a king too, so it only seemed fair to do same for her

but i still love her
and i thought she would be the ((one))

Yeah well women have a twisted conception of personal records. I know a girl who says everyone she dated in highschool didn't count in her total number, which is pretty stupid, like trying needlessly to undo the countless dick you've taken for the sake of have a better looking record, like lying on a resume. Both are petty and you should not engage with poeple acting like that. It would be like buying into a company that did frauds but likes to pretend that if it was before 2001 then it doesn't really count.

And the ex who you could never beat, that weird feeling. I counsel reading The Dead by James Joyce, which relate in someway to what you'll be living or are already living.

>>18688369
Ah shit, typo.

I meant to ask if I can be LEGAL if I'm illegal.

No

https://www.usa.gov/become-us-citizen

You've probably just hurt yourself by being in America illegally.

>>18688524
Oh. Shit, thanks anyway man.

>>18688367

change the color temperature, that helped me quite a bit

Install 4chanX and oneechan, pick a dark theme.

>>18688367
Turn on lights in the room and increase your distance to the monitor. If you can't see it you need glasses.

>>18688284
im probably gonna fail next week, bump

>>18688284
>What now ?
try again
try something different

>>18688284
>a uneducated
You really are retarded. You a boy or girl? It'll effect my answer for you.