How do I stop being a homewrecker? Two of my previous boyfriends left their girlfriend to be with me, and it looks like that story is going to repeat itself a third time soon. I don't mean or want to do this.
The funny thing is I'm not even worth it because I dumped them both abruptly after a year or so because intimacy scares me.
A rope and a stool.
>>18132519
>find out if they have a partner
>if yes, stop talking to them
>if no, continue
i used to do the same shit op, it doesn't stop unless you make the effort. get your attention from someone else and leave the others alone
>>18132519
I say this with all sympathy and from no place of jealousy, anger, or judgement:
Stop flirting with guys in relationships.
Learn how to say no.
Pick better people to hang with.
You kind of sound like a friend of mine.
She's like the sweetest person I know and I love her like a little sister.
But girls seem to hate her, and she's always getting in to really fucked up situations...
And I can say she brings this shit on herself because she's a FUCKING MASSIVE flirt who does not know how to say No.
I say this as a guy who's almost as big a flirt, so sometimes I get put in some awkward situations, but I know how to draw a line, I know when I've gone too far, and when to make things clear.
If you don't want to keep repeating the same shit over and if it makes you feel like you're a shitty person, fix it.
I'm a 29 year old girl
When I see young couples I feel really sad
I wish I could have had a boyfriend when I was young. I've never had one
How do I stop feeling sad about it and just make peace with it?
How fat are you?
>>18132517
I'm 168lbs 5'6.
>>18132515
>I'm a 29 year old girl
The older you get, the harder being alone is.
>When I see young couples I feel really sad
Doesn't matter how indifferent or special you pretend to be. Fitting in society feels fucking great, and not fitting hurts a lot.
>I wish I could have had a boyfriend when I was young. I've never had one
It's never "too late" to make something well done.
>How do I stop feeling sad about it and just make peace with it?
Don't know, try to fill your life with something else. Unfortunately there is no magic formula to overcome depression.
When is it worth apologizing to an ex?
I was the one who was largely at fault for us breaking up a while ago (Maybe 70-30, my fault and hers. She was manipulative and I was apathetic and unresponsive the entire time to everything). We were friends for years before we tried dating, and it destroyed our friendship. Would it be worth apologizing since it was largely on me and attempt to make amends, or would it be too little too late and better to let it die? I don't want anything out of it, just for her to know that I now understand what I did wrong. The guilt has been killing me for months.
If it's been 5-6 months or maybe even over 3 then I feel like it's cool to apologize.
Don't think you'll be happy afterwards though. You hurt someone, and then you want to apologize and "make it right" so you can sleep better?
>>18132561
I did this. We met up and fucked for a few weeks after. Things were going swimmingly, that is, until the girls squad caught wind and sent the canoe into a fucking iceberg
We no longer talk
Hope those bitches get the herp
Move on, dont dwell on it. Her making you want to apologize is just another manipulation. Forget and forgive yourself.
I need someone to talk to please.
I was recently released from prison after a 2 year + stint inside and I'm feeling hopeless and unironically considering suicide.
>>18132417
No clue about what you were in for, but somehow you got a second chance of living another try to get thing done right. How's suicide going to solve such potentials.
>>18132423
Don't have any potentials now.
>>18132427
Do you still have two hands and 2 foots? Do you have physical handicaps?
Background: Late 20's, 3 years together, live together.
Girlfriend has been acting strange for weeks, figure I should do some snooping and check her facebook messages. I know, wrong, but where there's smoke there's usually fire.
She's been hanging out with an old friend without telling me, and he's deeply in love with her, she tells him she's happy right now with me but it's a relationship that won't last forever, and maybe they have a future.
Advice, preferable mature, please. What shall I do?
>>18132358
Begin to emotionally detach from her. By her comments she already has from you and wants him and she needs him to hang in there a little while longer as she works on her exit from the relationship
Do you honestly need advice on that??
Just dump her, give zero explanation so that you don't have to tell her you peeked her facebook. At most, someday when she's with that guy in the future, just text her "that was why" and block in all social media to mindfuck her.
>>18132358
pressure her into A2M and then dump her right after for being a skank
do your best to ruin sex for her
How do I tell if I'm good enough to have a girlfriend?
If you have a girlfriend.
Would you date you?
Do you have something do give?
Do you take good care of yourself?
Is it weird I'm married and still don't feel attached to anyone? Like my parents or my wife could disappear and I don't think I would feel anything.
Sometimes I just want to be by myself...
>>18132322
Are you me?
>>18132322
Something you need advice on, son? I'm not here to just 'listen' because you're 'confused'. Go pay a shrink $50/hr for that.
I think that's called depression OP, and there are many different paths you can take to attempt to treat it.
Tell me about your toxic relationship, friend
mine:
A guy I've known for 6 years and I've been obsessed/madly in love with. We've been on and off. I'm currently in a committed relationship with someone that makes me the happiest I've ever been and is genuinely good for me. Tfw the guy and I can't stop cheating on our so's with each other. I honestly think we just like validation that we're still *that* person to each other
This person has martyr syndrome/complex. Constantly portrays herself as the victim when she actually instigates and purposefully causes incidents. Paints herself as "the good person" in these sick, twisted scenarios as well. "Woe as me, my life is so awful/stressful/hard, look at and acknowledge me with sympathy!" this isn't about a boyfriend it's about my mom. She's fucking sick. Sad thing is I moved 500 miles away to get away from her and came back when she convinced me she has cancer [this was a lie to get me to come back so she could win $50 in a bet to spend on weed... among being mentally ill and needing someone to constantly dump on]. I want to get my sister away from her then lock her in an institution and throw away the key.
>tfw I literally went back to my psychotic mother's
All I ever think about now is killing myself. But I won't leave my little moonbeam alone again. I will not allow anyone to take her away. She is all that I have.
Well my current relationship is very toxic. I'm very passive (idk about submissive) to a fault and the guy I'm with is a control freak. I mean this relationship started with him sexually assaulting me, me confronting him, and then me hugging him saying he's a good guy and it's not his fault. Knowing my idiocy I stayed with him because I just perpetuated something I wasn't supposed to, and I have not the courage to say what I think of him really. All the while he had a long distance girlfriend and he's convinced what he was doing is okay. Luckily she broke it off with him without my intervention which I should have done.
But it doesn't compare to what I project onto a guy I fucked a few times four years ago while I lived across the country. He's an artist and writer with cult following and I can't stop reading his stuff. The other reason I suspected I am in this abusive relationship is that my current boyfriend vaguely resembles the guy I project a lot onto. Only vaguely because the guy I project a lot onto is a beautiful poor saint who actively helps his community while my current boyfriend is an idiotic devil incarnate who feels like he's owed something for being poor. Anyway this is horrid obsession and I tried to tell him how I really felt but it didn't really pan out and I think I came off as creepy.
Tl;dr I am a coward who likes impoverished manic pixie dream boys
I am hoping after this is all over that I just live alone for a while.
>>18132953
Here's to psycho moms.
Mine's the classic "tiger mom" type. You know, the type who ruthlessly push their kids towards ever-increasing achievements with little regard to what the kid wants. Nothing is ever enough. I could win a fucking Nobel prize and she'd still either find a way to negate it or make it about herself (i.e. "See what you can do when you only listen to your mother?).
She probably rationalized it to herself that it's in my best interests, but it's really about projected achievement. I'm an object of prestige that she can show off to her social peers.
The fucked up bit is that despite knowing fully well how the game works, I always end up doing what she wanted anyway because of this deeply-ingrained sense of inadequacy and need for validation.
Do u ever get the the feeling around one of your friends that he/she has manipulate-ish behavior? Being passive-aggressive when it doesnt go their way, talk your ideas down, etc.. I told mine that she can be manipulative at times. She demanded hard examples and i couldnt find any. Of course i felt like an idiot.
She said my behavior is egoitistical because we would always do what i want and whenever she wants to do something i dont want i recommend to split up and meet later. (Were on a vacation)
"If i would be manipulative it goes pretty well for me than(referring to her 37 whatsapp messages) and i got many friends."
2 other friends i talked to also think that she can be bossy and tactical but not in a visible/aggressive way.
I dont know. Am i just paranoid? I deal with manipulative behavior, depression myself. But i try to better myself with therapy.
I dont get the feeling out of me that shes plotting things to go her way. Im confused. Maybe im just projecting?
TL;DR: Female friend looks manipulative to me. I told her that and she turned it around and i looked like an asshole.
>>18132201
Yup, always saw how they use people but never saw witnessed them acting like that towards me.
Now I'm stuck living with them. Every time I say I don't want to live with them anymore they throw a fit and start talking about moving out of state and never coming back. Getting to the point that I don't give a shit if they do.
>>18132211
You're not supposed to give a fuck. What's up with this bitch-ass society where people are afraid to tell each other "no" anymore?
>>18132211
I decided that ill get some distance from her. But shes almost my only friend i have contact with regurlary. Well, time to make some new friends.
i have a wonderful life, job, Lovely girlfriend, friends, schoolmates, family well constructed, but yet i still feel empty inside, like i was tired of all things that i enjoy, i don't want to feel this way, but i cannot control it, in a matter of fact, i don't even try to.
im feeling like a complete loser, because i have such beautiful life , and yet, want all to slip away, so in the future, i can regret, wtf is wrong with me ?
>>18132200
>i have a wonderful life, job, Lovely girlfriend, friends, schoolmates, family well constructed, but yet i still feel empty inside, like i was tired of all things that i enjoy, i don't want to feel this way, but i cannot control it, in a matter of fact, i don't even try to.
>im feeling like a complete loser, because i have such beautiful life , and yet, want all to slip away, so in the future, i can regret, wtf is wrong with me ?
Sounds a lot like depression .. see doc get help
>>18132200
Not saying you should go outside and go fuck up your life to experience everything. You just need to see that there's more out there that can actually be seen. Just consider yourself extremely lucky to be living a privileged life.
Yeah, i know man, but i just want to understand why this feeling, like....i have nothing at all to be sad....
Guys, how can I become normie? I am not /pol/ crazy, however I have my strong political views. I do not try to change other ppl opinions and I do respect other opinions. Furthermore I do not try to present them in any occasion. However what drives me crazy is the fact that everyone once I present my opinions start to percive you as a facist or something like that. Any you can see it everywhere, media, social gathering etc... I also have fucked up sense of humor. I am pretty straight forward when it comes to interaction with ppl because I consider them as my "friends" once I get to know them.
what are the traits of normie, how do they act, what do they do and what are they like?
>>18132170
>normie
It is a meme.
Talk less and think more if you hate getting reactions to your /pol/ ideas.
Being adult is about doing whatever you want and bearing consequences!
>>18132170
Acquiring normie friends:
Be boring yet interesting, show that you are intelligent but keep secrets, be loyal but not too much. You should give them just enough for them to want more, don't give them more before you know them well thought.
Acquiring normie pals:
Once you have normie friends and you know them well you can start to show more interest in their life, making them think subconsciously that you like them. Start smiling to them when they tell jokes and be pleasant to be around for them.
Acquiring normie buddies:
Once you have your normie pals on the hook you should start setting up social meetings etc., but remember to stay mysterious and neutral when they are many. After a couple of social meetups that you have organized you can start inviting people alone to the same events instead, they will feel safe because they have been there before and you can start showing them your humour etc while having fun with them.
Acquiring normie best-friends:
Start group traditions such as hanging out literally in a tree in a park or laying on the grass in a specific area alot. Go on visits to them as much as you can(alone or with the rest of the group), and invite them a couple of times too(not too much thought). Open up to them in the same speed they are opening up to you and you will soon be on the way to having your own group of friends which you are in controll of.
If you want other psychological tricks ask away.
>>18132233
More please
I don't know what to do, so maybe one of you can help me.
I'll give you the background information so you know where I'm coming from.
>Be 25
>be in college
>live with grandmother
>want to move out
>live in shit hole city full of niggers and crime
>need a place to live
>don't know a roommate
>don't trust anyone
>I have a good chunk of change saved up and I only have 2 semesters left (9 months) of school
What are my options here?
Do i need to put an ad on craigslist or something looking for a roommate?
I've had roommates in the past and none of them tend to work out.
The job I'm working right now only pays me 200 dollars a week, but as I've said, I can move some things around to make it work if necessary.
I've toyed with the notion of buying a mobile home or an RV, but I don't know where to park it. And I think that trailer parks tend to be crime ridden, and knowing the city that I live in--I wouldn't doubt it.
Any and all advice is welcome.
First of all, don't move out yet. Find a better salary to save a little bit more money until you feel you can live out of your neighborhood. At that moment, start searching for another job at your preferred location and do your transition to there once you got it. A shit hole will always be a shit hole, you'll just live a miserable life if you stay there.
Finish school and then start looking for a job. Try to get a good job and say you are willing to move. Try to get an apartment near your job.
>>18132139
Unless you have gfto live with, there is no reason to make yourself more poor by paying rent.
Be more clever!
I was proud that I could get some good career but my grades are going downhill. I feel like I got some unknown disease that detoriates my memory, my problem solving skills.
I'm studying in university but in this last year my grades started to drop dramatically.
My MRI, blood tests everything seemed normal. Clinically I'm a normal person yet I keep forgetting everything I study.
I tried to use mnemonics but then I forgot which mnemonic is for what.
I've never do drugs I drink alcohol rarely.
Still when I try to remember something I feel like I'm bashing my head against some kind of metal wall.
I dunno what the fuck is wrong with me.
Halp annons
>>18132129
Better start looking for a caretaker before the progression gets worse. It ain't no joke like Rakim said.
You said you've had blood tests etc, but did you specifically ask the doctors about dementia, or were the tests for something else? There are a lot of things that could possibly cause this, you'd really have to ask a doctor, but some things to think about- Have you had any medication changes? Are you depressed? Have you had fevers before the memory loss started? Have you had a concussion or played sports where your head got hit?
Stress is a known factor in this, when my mother got burned out her memory went really bad. It's good now though. So are you stressed Op?
So I'm on night (morning) one of a group vacation. The person I'm bunking with is snoring like a fucking fiend and has kept me from sleeping for more than like an hour and a half over the entire night.
It's fucking covered in snow everywhere and I'm fucking exhausted and I don't want to hang out with anyone, I just want to sleep.
But people are making special trips just to come see us and are expecting us to hang out all day and night. How do I do this with no rest? For the next 5 days?
7-11's and such will have earplugs. Buy some.
See if your bunk mate will sleep on their side or stomach, that will prevent snoring.
Try energy drinks.
I fucking read that "snorting" and immediately thought about your friend doing coke and and partying kek
Alright, so I've got a couple of roommates. Yesterday, I wanted to go grocery shopping, and asked if they wanted to get in on it. They said later, and I was fine with that.
Today, I got back from work to find the cupboards and fridge full, but with junk. They got:
>12 frozen burritos
>8 cup of noodles
>tortilla chips and salsa
>a shit ton of soda
>a gallon of milk
>half a gallon of fucking goldfish crackers
No eggs, meats, veggies, cheese, or anything that you cook on a stove or oven. Nothing to get anything in your diet but starch and a bit of meat. Also, none of the non-foods we needed like a new pot or dish soap.
So, do I confront them about what they bought, or do I just go buy my own stuff, and leave each to their own. I'm worried that if I divide my stuff from theirs, they'll accuse me of not sharing what I bought while dipping into theirs (though nothing they bought but milk appeals to me). On the other hand, if I just let it all sit together, then they'll run out of their poorly-chosen food within a week and be eating all the shit I bought.
Anybody have similar experiences that they worked out?
>>18132088
Why not buy your own milk? Surely there are containers smaller than a jug in burgerland.
I think you are in a strong position to deploy bants at them for being clueless teenagers. Consistently and immediately express zero tolerance policy for nicking your shit, regardless of compensation.
>>18132088
Sharing food with roommates is a fundamentally shitty idea for this reason exactly. I wouldn't go all in on the junk food like they did, but I have zero interest in cooking something in an oven or on the stove for every meal. Some people just didn't grow up that way, anon, and expecting them to match your tastes is a bad idea. Plus, "cooking for the house" always ends up a losing battle. Someone you live with is inevitably going to either eat more than their share, never cook when it's their turn, or just outright be a shit cook.
Politely tell your roommates that you'd like some different stuff and that you'd like to buy your own things going forward. That you won't touch their stuff, either.
In my house we don't share jack shit because the third roommate won't even pitch in on trash bags or detergent. He's getting kicked out.
>>18132107
This. Never do a community thing with food and necessities. Someone will most likely in the end feel like they are not getting their fair share.
When my wife (we weren't married at the time) and I first moved in together we asked a friend couple to move in with us. The other couple had a fixed income (and also neither of them worked, they collected SSI) and we thought it would be a good idea for them to live with us. We even said we would split bills paying in 3 ways, I pay 1/3, my wife pay 1/3, and the couple pay 1/3 even though they were 2 people. Their fixed income wasn't alot but enough to ensure they could cover that and have money left over. They agreed obviously cause that was a great deal for them. When food and necessities were brought up I said that they had to buy their own stuff. They wanted to do a community thing but we said no. I figured my wife and I worked and would be gone alot and the couple would be home all day and they would just be eating and drinking more then their share. Needles to say they declined to move with us over it but my wife and I realized the bullet we dodged. We got a smaller place without them and 2 months later they were asking for help from us because turns out they were terrible with money.