Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2089. page

Girlfriend won't tell me that I'm unattractive, what do?

>>18155177
Hit the gym. Make yourself attractive, she will respond. Also keeping up with your hygiene helps. Shower in the morning and at night.

>>18155182
Shower twice a day? Holy fuck.

That aside, the issue is more that I can't get her to admit that it's an issue.

I know that I'm unattractive, I just kind of wish she was able to tell me that instead of me finding out that she went and fucked off with some guy some day, you know?

>>18155155
Sorry to hear. Maybe you should leave him and focus on yourself until someone better comes along.

How long has this been going?

>>18155158
All else is good though. Just this. Just wish he would realise how it hurts me. Maybe he doesnt care. Tbh i think he does it as he knows it hurts.

>>18155143
No. Have you seen porn stars? They look awful.
Most likely there's a lot of sexual harassment/rape going on. And drugs, a lot of drugs.

Color me fucking skeptical. The porn industry is not, in general, particularly easy to get into for guys (Unless you're going gay, which I'm assuming you would've specified. Or some very niche fetish shit.) Much easier for girls, for obvious reasons. And for a dude, it takes more than being in reasonably good shape and having a non-hideous dick; you have to be able to get an erection on command, and keep it for a very long time, all while having sex (with breaks!) in somewhat unnatural positions that don't necessarily feel that great but look good for the camera. Also you have to be able to both cum and not cum on command. Yeah, there are drugs and injections that help, but it's still not trivial. There are dudes who are simply unable to do that. I'm sure I'm one of them, not that I've tried.

So while I don't have any specific tips or tricks for identifying scams, and while I suppose it's POSSIBLE that there are small porn studios that hire male actors off of nothing but dick pics and "quizzes," I doubt that what's happening here is entirely above board, and I would recommend against signing any "contract" with them.

When something seems too good to be true, it usually is.

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>>18155153
>rape
>drugs
>sexual harrassment
where do i sign up?
>>18155143
lucky. cherish it for me

yes, talk to women like real effing human beings and not objects to be won

>Hey, how are you doing?
>My name is Anon, may i know your name?
>Well ____, i think you're very pretty, let's talk and get to know each other.

Don't take yourself so seriously, if she rejects you, you pretend that you don't even know what she's talking about and move on to the next girl.

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>>18155123
>going to a nightclub alone for the sole purpose of picking up chicks
>thinks he's actually going to pick up chicks

>>18155097
you'll have to give a bit more info than that

>>18155097

There's the internet. You literally don't have to move anywhere to be a music producer.

>>18155097
Bus?

Yes it does but people do it to vent. Since its easier talking to a complete that doesn't know you and can judge you differently from family or friends.

>tell me a bit about yourself
burgeoning alcoholic, depressed and currently sinking my GPA with bad habits
desperate for a decent relationship because god knows I cant continue my current path of self pity and half a bottle of bourbon most nights much longer
aside from the pathetic bits about me, I love me some metal and tabletop gaming, as well as the gym
what about you, anon?

I'm also on the path of self pity and unsuccessful everything I try to work out.

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>shut in QT 3.14's

This is something that I want also, and that I've mulled over a fair bit, and my conclusion is: Our chances of meeting such girls are very low.

Consider:
1. If they are shut-in's, they're not going to be in social situations very much
2. Humans are social animals, and women on average are much more so. They're emotional and crave societal validation. Western society is superficial, and good looks increases chances of societal integration. Therefore, if a girl is good-looking, the chances of her integrating into society are very high. Therefore, with women, shut-in-ness and qt3.14-ness are generally mutually exclusive - if they are shut-in's, they're generally not good looking; if they're good looking, they're generally not shut-in's.
3. Given the general tendency outlined in 2, those that satisfy both conditions are *generally* emotionally or psychologically malformed
4. If shut-in qt3.14's *are* in social situations, they may avoid social contact
5. If shut-in qt3.14's have social skills for the few instances they are in social situations, it will be hard to identify/distinguish them


I'm not saying it's possible, and that those are absolutely true for all women (note the word 'generally'), but I'm just saying: I think the odds are against us, man.

No idea about goths though.

>>18155065
Internet chatrooms desu. Talking to one right now and while she is reasonably attractive and interesting she has a lot of mental issues and takes a lot of meds which in turn make her unstable and sleepy throughout the day. So I'm not sure if I recommend it from personal experience

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>>18155156
Damn, such is life I guess. I mean

(I know it sounds silly.) I just think it would be kinda cool to meet someone like >Pic Related

I mean out of the 3.5 billion women there's gotta at least be thousands of women that are like her maybe not to extreme anime proportions but at least a little like that.

Also where all the QT's that dress in all black. If you had or have the goth look. Please brink it back it was the hottest thing in the world.

Your boyfriend sounds like an ass, you should try finding someone better. Why did he bring up sleeping with her anyway? Did you ask him: "If we weren't together would you sleep with her?"

Also, he shouldn't be calling you names just because you're upset. It sounds like he is attracted to her, obviously, but if something were to happen between you two, like having a big fight...i wouldn't be surprised if he would go on and flirt with her.

>>18155063
I only say this because I had a similar situation with my ex and although he didn't do anything at first... One night we got in a big fight and a few days later I find out he was flirting with her after the fight ended because of the fight.

You asked for honesty. Cute girls are cute girls. Sex feels good. Being not-lonely is good. You're fine, he cares about you. Don't pay it much mind. She's just wasting her time.

>hiring women
>ever
You brought this on yourself

Fuck sake. Hiring a YOUNGER woman? Please... I'm pretty sure it's easy to say that's bullshit

Is she flirting with you specifically or everyone? She could just have a flirtatious personality and not mean anything by it. Hard to tell without some examples.

Either way just tell her that you don't think its very appropriate. Don't strait up tell her to stop but make it clear that what she is doing is not correct and not appreciated.

Having kids when you're """financially stable""" is a meme

>>18155042
you are a meme

I have money but not enough for a house. I'm talking about my own not my bf. I know it should be both of us saving but eh I already have a few thousand . I know having kids can be expensive. And I have to plan for the future.

>>18155033
ok

>>18155033
They do exist, though they are farther and fewer in between.

As you get past 27 you'll find the MAJORITY of girls dont party on the regular. It is more a burden of your age than anything.

Take your time, search out the few nuggets of straight-edge girls that exist at your age.

Have a drink and lighten up OP.

You just gotta tell him strait up that you are gay.

He will probably be sad and maybe even angry at first but if he really cares about you he will be supportive.

Maybe also try asking /lgbt/ if you haven't already. I'm sure they are more qualified than /adv/

Tell him you might be gay and that you might want to explore this aspect of your sexuality with him.
He'll either be down or leave you.

>>18155026
>but if he really cares about you he will be supportive
If he's a fucking cuck.
In a realistic circumstance, he'll break up with you, OP. You will devastate him just by telling him you like women. Might as well let him down right then and there rather than let him suffer.

>>18154983
a keyboard
you can get one good enough for his purposes for 100 shekels or less

>>18154983
>tfw this already fucked kid is going to get ruined by a single mother
Why is this allowed. Why do we let women raise males by themselves when they're not capable at all?

t. Guy raised by single mother who had to teach himself everything about being a man and is still sort of fucked

>>18154992
This or a computer.

Teach him to program and become a wizard

Understand that we're all going to die, the concept of a hierarchy is an illusion and no matter what happens in your social interaction it won't be a big deal in a week or a month so just don't worry about it. What helped me the most was understanding everybody has insecurities, whether they know how to hide them or not, you just have to feel like you're on equal ground with whoever you're talking to and don't be afraid to speak your mind. Don't start drinking or doing coke during the day as a means of loosening up, just recognize that some part of you is capable of functioning socially and put in the time that it takes to change your perspective enough to do the same sober. When it comes to communicating in a workplace environment or in an interview you just have ti be confident in your skills and go from there, you're not paid to make small talk you're paid to do a task and if you know you can do that task effectively you just have to convey that with every interaction.

>>18154991
OK, so often I feel out of place work. But I talked to my manager and asked him upfront whether they will hire me on for the next contract and he said yes, and that my performance is good. But at the same time Im very ambitious and I want to go far. My social skills are holding me back and I know it, thats why I asked here. Im trying so hard to be confident, but I always end up nervous and just completely a wreck with just casual conversations that should be simple stuff

>>18154999
Also, forgot to mention that I only ever open up to people emotionally when Im really drunk or high on coke -- other than that I'm quite literally emotionless and robotic. I just can't emotionally relate to people unless I'm drunk or coked up.

I don't really know what to do with that, though

>>18154968
>am I in the ethical right?

Yeah, you're fine.

Even if you had cameras in your bedroom, so long as you werent pervy about it and watched them later it is ethical.

Obviously nothing in bathrooms, regardless of anything that is unethical.

But in general areas of your home and outside are realistic, practical and ethically A_OK

>>18154968
It passes an ethics test, as long as you don't have any intention in benefiting from this endeavor sexually, financially, or otherwise outside of self defense.

You're not allowed to record people where they have a reasonable expectation of privacy