Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2087. page

>>18156373

Just because one guy doesn't like you or doesn't want to date you, doesn't mean you are undatable or unlikable. It doesn't even mean you're unlikable to that guy, he just happened to like the other chick better. Just find another guy who likes you just fine, even if you're not that ambitious or creative. Don't let insecurity win.

Don't assume you need to change yourself because one guy didn't like you. That's dumb. Don't be dumb.

>>18156383
But I've never been able to find a guy who like me in that way. I've never been on a date.

Girls do that because they like having a dependable source of attention and feel secure knowing they can have you as backup.

If you still have feelings for her, tell her you don't want to be friends but get in touch if you want to "start iver," then go full no contact. No texts, calls, likes, never look at her social media, etc. unless she wants to meet up and talk in person, she's dead to you.

Do you want her back? If so, stop being her fucking backup plan.

Start over*

>>18156754

You got your answer, OP.

Go fuck some other girls and stop thinking about your ex. You should not be friends with her.

If you think being friends with an ex is a backdoor into starting a new relationship you're in for heartbreak. Chances are she's fucking someone else right now.

theres not." i have this really negative notion in my mind about frat boys. Probably cus of my interactions with the other houses. Anyway, were seeing eachother now. It started off when i sent a nude of me 6 weeks post partum. I got really lucky no stretch marks etc very fit. I guess he didnt even know i had a son until then. I think around that time i cut the whole him coming over while my sons awake out completely. Loooooong story short. Were seeing eachother. He claims im the 4th woman hes been with. There are some slight feelings. Im falling for a fuck boy right? I only think that cus hes in a frat but still...

>>18156149
Just don't try to trap him with child support

File: 1421400703751.jpg (83KB, 934x506px) Image search: [Google]

83KB, 934x506px

>>18156151
Your concern right now should be saving up enough money to find a good area to move to for your child. Enjoy the sex while you can, don't expect this guy to be YOUR guy if he's talking about sleeping with other women.

Your number 1 priority is your CHILD. Get your nice ass to a better living space before you start thinking about romance.

>>18156117

unfortunately the sugar daddy model is dying in favor of basic prostitution.

wealthy men have realized that its cheaper to simply offer 100 to 150 dollars per meeting than it is to deal with someone who is still a prostitute, but acts like he is a boyfriend.

it also allows them to go after multiple boys without fear of one getting upset about the other, and it also stops backlash from peers who constantly whine about how their 'boyfriend' is just a gold digging asshole.

its simply easier to acknowledge what it is: an arrangement, and not let emotion and expectation and such get mixed up in it.

times are changing.

also
>im not a particularly attractive guy
>but im sure someone who is rich and has tons of hot twink sluts begging for his cock would choose me because i 'put in time and effort'

kek

>>18156132
well from what i've read a lot of them are actually seeking companionship in addition to the sex. not to accuse you of talking shit (since i have no idea either, or i wouldnt be here) but do you have some experience with this?

i would think there wouldnt be so many people on SeekingArrgements if they all just went off fucking prostitutes, but maybe i'm more naive than i think

>>18156152

yes, i have six years experience on this, while sugar daddy relationships do exist, if you go to seekingarrangement the arrangement they offer is generally 'i will give you X amount of money every time we have sex, averaging about 2 or 3 times a month, but no promise on the exact number'.

as a general rule unless you're actually really attractive, you're not going to get a traditionally sugar daddy relationship.

they might take you out to dinner and cuddle afterwards, but they are not looking for you to move in, or see you for casual dates unless you're really worth the money.

I've had a few traditional sugar daddy offers, but they tend to be purposely vague as they dont want to commit to anything, and will often keep it going for just a short while, then move on to thenext boy, screwing you out of income you were relying on.

No. All of the pros you listed are not true. The true way is through Jesus Christ.

>>18156064
I'm not buying the whole Jesus thing desu.

>>18156072
But you believe in God?

Sorry this isn't a question about trying to get into some cunt's pants, God.

>>18156124
Relax you fucking dipshit, it's an incredibly slow board.

>>18156124

>people aren't volunteering their time to tell me to learn how to fucking budget
>THAT MAKES THEM AWFUL

dont be rude, you came here for advice, advice you need because you are too dumb to sit down and budget out how much you'd need to live a year.

humble yourself.

>>18156052
Is this not the point of a realtionship. You don't need to constantly be with someone to have a good realtionship. Two career driven individuals. Might see each other a few times a month. There are people out there who would be fine with that. I know I would be.

>>18156098
But how do you become intimate with someone if you can't bother to socialize more than 5 minutes a day ?

>>18156052

the problem here is that you assume its gotta be one or the other.

most people aren't truly introverted or extroverted, but rather on a spectrum between the two.

introversion simply means recharging with alone time.

extroversion means recharging with people time.

and most people need both. if you spend too much time alone you want to go out. too much time out you want to go in. we all just tend to lean toward one more than the other, and in your case, introversion.

and while life is about trying to make yourself happy, happy does take work, and sometimes you got to do things that arent ideal.

some anons complain that all they care about in life are vdieo games, and the fact that they need to work in order to play video games in their spare time is so depressing that they want to kill themselves. this isnt them making themselves happy, this is them insisting that happiness is this one tiny niche.

enjoy your inside time, but make an effort to have SOME outside time, if you are strictly romantic and not looking for friendship, then dabble in online dating or dating services to meet women who are in your situation.

yes, it will be hard, no there aren't tons of hot qt girls just waiting for some loner to fuck em. it will take effort.

so you have to decide whats more important, this strict definition of being a loner, or having some affection.

becuase when you say
>Dont pursue relationships
>dont want a hooker

you're stuck basically inviting fat ugly chicks over for one night stands and then misleading them into thinking it will lead to something.

your problems, your limits, are self imposed, based on your ideal reality, not on what will actually make you happy in the given reality.

do you wash your balls?
I got a nasty rash after touching my balls and forgetting to wash my hands after hitting the gym and touching some weights

>>18156034
i do wash my balls, but i did start hitting the gym lately and the first thing i do is change into pajama pants when i get home, so this actually settles my mind a little bit
Thank you.

>>18156023
herpes usually expresses at the site of infection. So like, it would be ON your dick or balls (i guess unless you had a cut on your stomach or stretchmarks or something and she was grinding on that?).

I have HSV-1 and I almost always get it in the same spot on my mouth when I have an infection. Barring those I get it in spots I have accidentally spread it to since initially contracting the disease as a child (nose, chin, other side of my mouth).

They start out feeling like tingly pimples, then they burst basically on their own and crust over with a brown, hard crust. It gets itchy sometime between tingly and bursting.

Don't hide things from your doctor. Let them know why you have the concerns you have. What the fuck are they going to do with an incomplete picture? That's not going to help you or them, and you're just wasting everyone's time.

just slip him an anonymous note that his gf has been cheating on him and he should investigate her, that would remove all ties you had with your knowledge, if your girlfriend's friend told anyone else, she's in the clear, if not, idk

>>18155992
It's always funny, a choice between doing the right.thing or doing the least damaging thing.

I personally keep my mouth shut and prevent any damage, but alot of people believe the right thing trumps the wise thing

>>18155992
Contact the guy nameless.

Don't be THAT guy. You know the one. The dude finally finds about the cheating and it comes up that you knew all along. Everyone knew, but him. Don't be that guy. Just drop a nameless message some way to the dude. You can even rp to be one of the fuck boys.

Sort of, 4 years and counting at my current job. It's incredibly stressful and is negatively affecting my health but I'm just not sure when I'm going to pull the plug. Part of me says that this is going to be the same case everywhere, and that I should at least stay here where I get paid decently instead of dealing with the same shit elsewhere for lower pay, the other part just wants nothing to do with this current place anymore.

Don't really know what to say though, it's very easy to say "just quit and find a new job" but there's no guarantee that any new job will be less stressful. Just if you do decide to quit, make sure your finances are okay and you can handle being unemployed in the interim while you find a new job.

are you going to have an exit interview? best time to express what you think of the job.

>>18155952
Just a job bro.

Your life, not theirs. Give notice, and leave it at that. This is a process that has a standard operating procedure that is standard etiquette for everyone in the states.

Let your boss know, give him a day you'll resign ~two weeks ahead of current point, and do it.

Or be a bitch and get yourself fired so you can draw unemployment for awhile.

Or just quit without notice and waste 7 years of employment history because of a bad finish.

Or suck it up and work there for the rest of your life until you're able to retire.


I usually try to get fired around the 1.5 year mark or so.

I've been with my company for about three years now, and am planning on quitting once I start my CDL training. I've just been saving money until then, and hoping they fire me for dem benefits.

>>18155922

>made me develop an obsession towards him because he self-diagnosed he had dependency disorder.

your girlfriend sounds like a piece of work, but you're just trying to make up shit at this point.

>what do you think

i think you wanted to break up with him so you did, congrats.

>>18155935
OP here. I kid you not, this is all true. Every bit of it. And I meant on reasons and such.

>>18155945

>its all true

no anon, he didnt MAKE YOU develop an obsession towards him.

YOU developed an obsession towards him cuz you're dumb.

dont turn yourself to him, dont victimize yourself on every perceived slight against you. dont blame everyone else for stupid shit that just happens.

>>18155822
Also forgot to mention i'm italian, so i can't really buy from american shops without losing an arm and a leg with shipping costs

File: c31f05e3756dbd10d3ca90b191248982.jpg (86KB, 570x1204px) Image search: [Google]

86KB, 570x1204px

Get reclaimed wood and some sandpaper (and paint, but it's money so don't have to get), rope thread, and something that makes holes to tie the threads in to design a cool hipster shelf.

Buy a bunch of cheap glass vases that cost a dollar each, idk if you have it there and find some plants and create terrariums, a layer of small rocks on the bottom, grounded charcoal over the rocks, and good soil as the middle layer, and then the plant

Should cost around $5-10
I made mine with different lengths and each level was offput from the x-axis to make it look less rigid

>>18155822
Go out on the street in tourist areas and around museums to find lots of street venders selling prints. Haggle in Italian to get them to cut tourist prices.

Things I've done:
>helped him sign up for My Fitness Pal calorie counting app
>trying to do more active dates (walking dogs, hiking, walking downtown, etc)
>packing him lunch (he refuses most of the time, likes fast food with coworkers)
>cooking dinner more at home (he still takes big helpings)

The thing that sucks is that he gets really down on himself and apologetic when I bring up his health and appearance so I don't know a way to frame it in a way that makes him motivated and not depressed.

>>18155819
Get him to lift weights with the idea of getting stronger and not with the idea of losing weight. I used to be fat but I loved the feel of my muscles getting bigger, and now without even trying I nearly have a full 6 pack after no time at all. And also try to get him to ear healthier with the idea of being healthy instead of the idea of losing weight, I switched to salads instead of chocolate etc and now I feel way more energized and happy

>>18155912
This might actually be a good strategy. He has always eaten like crap (still brags about eating a lot at a time like a teenager would) but was really active with sports/weights in highschool so it was negated. It's difficult because he works 8-5 every day and comes home dog-tired. I usually can't even get him to walk the dogs with me, he just wants to play computer games. I'll try and bring it up with him, I just hope he doesn't take it as my being controlling or anything

>>18155796
This one is simple, you're lucky, you get to travel alone! You have nothing holding you back.

Wherever you go, look for a place to meet people like a club or something. You can cut loose all you want. Look at it that way.

>>18155820
:/

>>18155835
No seriously, it'll really help boost your self esteem, one night at the club helped me, a girl threw up on me and I went home with a different one.

It was life changing. I think it can help of you look for relationships outside of your circle, Its what I do now

>>18155743
There is no way for you to make $2300 a month with crippling social anxiety and no spectacular skills, unless you suck a mean dick.

move to cheaper housing and get a new job or be homeless. don't fall for the stock trading meme.

Gay porn

>>18155747

I can code. I'm IT. Or...was.