Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1953. page

>>18203536
You are probably too boring but he sounds boring too
Do you have a job? What do you do in your week?

>>18203536
Male here:

Pleading with him will do the opposite of help your cause. When you wait on him hand and foot like his mommy, and try to cuddle up and be as close as possible all the time, he feels like he has you by the neck. He feels that youre head over heels obsessed with him and he can do whatever he wants and still fall back on you... which seems to be true. First of all, you need to get some self confidence and learn how to be alone and not freak out. Second, you need to start doing your own thing. Put on a sexy outfit and go out with some friends one night. Nothing would get his attention quicker. Stop showering him with attention and begging for recognition.

>>18203548
I am a graphic designer and I work from home. I have my hobbies and those are the only things keeping me sane atm.
It's still winterish here where we live so staying home is kinda a must.

>>18203475
That's not gonna be enough to kill you

>>18203475
You will damage your brain from overdose. Enjoy living rest of your life as crippled kid.

You have rich enough parents to go on such hooliday, what is your struggle? Even if you feel empty inside, we have happy pills to reverse that feelings.

What is your problem?

>>18203515
Life hasn't got anything worth living for. I don't want to discuss why I'm doing it. I just want to know if it will work.

>>18203471
Replying for interest. I would like to boost my dating pool a bit

You weren't even properly dating this 'most gorgeous fucking girl,' don't make it sound like you were with her for a million years and can't handle being with anyone less.

>>18203477

Sure. You're right.. I wasn't in a relationship with her, but i did have her interest for a bit. I think to rephrase my question i'd say, "how do i date average girls when i proved that i can possibly get a 10?"

I should be going for the average girl. They're sweeter, require less maintenance, and they don't have 500 other possible replacements texting them 24-7. But since i almost had a 10, i just want more now.

She just thinks you're not having fun, that's all.

>>18203458
I dont see a problem. You will meet with somebody capable of finding out what might be wrong with you and even setting you on right path. It is like medical check up.

Be honest and dont lie. You might find out that you are different from social standards. You have 0 friends at school, am I right?

Do yourself favor and dont lie to the therapist so he can work as he is payed for.

Be glad your mommy is interested in your well being. Not everybody has such fortune in their lives.

>>18203458
She's right you 8 year old shit

The point of being young is to fuck everyone and do all the drugs.
Once you have a career you never will again

>>18203409
As someone struggling through a video game and porn addictions and trying to gain weight, going regularly to the gym and practicing drawing, I suggest you read two books:

The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson
I didn't particularly like this book that much as I was reading it, but after I was done with it I noticed I always felt more aware and as a result more in control.

The Willpower Instinct by Kelly McGonigal
This is a great book on resisting temptation (both the temptation to do and to not do). It deals a lot with losing weight as an example, but even if it didn't it'd be a good read. It's one of those books I can safely say everyone in the world should read.

A pdf of The Slight Edge is easy to find, but I don't know about the willpower instinct. It isn't an expensive book anyway and it's well worth the money.

>>18203437
I'll try those books but idk how well they could work, idk how some random words from a man or women that has no meaning to me can affect and change me.

>>18203409
Your body is used to carbs, carbs don't full you up so the more carbs you eat the more carbs you want
Also carbs make you tired and sleepy so the more carbs you eat the less activity you do so you get even faster and since you are tired and sleepy and bored and you don't move alone you are likely to eat even more carbs
Try to eat half the amount of calories in your usual snacks but I'm fat rich food with very little to no carbs and you will nottice you camt

>>18203382
>should I do it?
Probably not, you're likely to regret it.

>>18203382
With prostitutes you get what you pay for
Get a cheap one and it will be fucking an older washed up whore who did too many drugs and never bothered with her life, kind of disgusting
You can get one of those girls who can't really afford college so they whore themselves out of their apparent but not to anyone, basically they as their male friends to only give her number to people she can trust
This is pretty great but those girls only do it for a month or two, closest you will get to having sex with a regular girl
You can blow a lot of money on a professional escort. But know that they are used to keeping wealthy men entertained not taking someone's virginity

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>>18203382
>To clarify, I don't feel lonely or depressed or anything like that, I'm not a fat neckbeard and I certainly am not unfulfilled, but I'm a complete social outcast with 0 women in my life, and sometimes I wonder what it feels like, you know?

Honestly, grow some balls, and talk to a girl
If it works, congrats
If it doesn't, try again till you become an alpha male

Getting into a relationship with somebody when your life goals are the polar opposite seems like a bad idea dude, you should really not assume that she will somehow come around or change her mind, thats a big gamble.

>>18203287
>For six months
>(it would be too soon)
>Crush
Aaaaaand DROPPED.

Underage, b8, etcetera.

>>18203287

You're putting the cart way before the horse here. This is what putting pussy on a pedestal is. You haven't found out if she even is interested in you romantically, and you're planning out what it's going to be like to have kids with her. And, you're planning to "confess," or "tell her that you love her." You don't love her. You love the idea of her, especially if you're using her as your sole motivation for improvement in life.

You're failing to realize that in life, everyone's shit stinks at least a little bit. This girl is flawed just like the rest of us, and even if she IS interested, you've got years ahead of you to learn whether or not you can spend a weekend together, much less a lifetime raising kids.

For one, take two whole big steps back, and don't tell this chick you "LOVE" her. You're going to dump this whole big pile of dependency on her and immediately scare her away. People don't respond well to these grandiose gestures of love because they realize they might hurt the other person when they don't feel the same level of intensity.

Now, I don't know what idiots on here told you it was "too soon" to make your interest in her known, because that's a stupid fucking idea. While the "friendzone" doesn't exist, the longer and longer you hammer away at a girl that you're just her pal and not in this because you have feelings, the worse off you're going to be. Take a minute to step back from this friendship, reassess your feelings, ask her if she'd like to go on a more serious date, and don't fucking pour out your heart. Never works.

Are you scared of crossing a line?
Scared of being rejected?

>>18204452
Not OP, but I have the same problem.

And yeah, mostly rejection. Also a fear of being vulnerable to others. Lots of it comes from past relationships/the relationship with my family growing up.

Been cheated on twice. Parents were never loving or caring, blackmailed me as a kid to get me to act how they wanted, etc.

Trust issues, pretty much. I'd rather be alone than have to feel like that again. But, either way, it's a crippling way of life.

>>18205906
Then they reject you and then what

Here's a secret: people can already tell you're fat, even outside of PE. Skipping PE isn't going to hide that you're fat.

>>18203250

this would be something you ask your counselor or teacher, we could not possibly know your schools requirements, only they can.

you could always talk to your PE teacher and ask for an alternative though. I was not very coordinated and hated playing sports but the teacher was estatic to let me just run the track the entire time. he let me use my ipod to listen to music so id spend an hour and a half of class every other day just walking aroudn the track, ocassionally running. usually id run 1/4th then walk the other 3/4ths.

at the beginning of the semester my 1 mile time was 16 minutes.

at the end i could run a mile in 7 minutes.

>>18203284
My counselor literally told me he doesnt know how to test out of gym in the slightest, and that nobody has ever been successful (which sounds like bullshit to me)

>>18203196
bad idea OP. can guarantee you have a less than 1% success chance without even knowing your situation.

>>18203204
well in a way its more about getting the weight off my chest than any kind of "success". I was thinking this might be a way to finally move on.

>confession
You've been watching too many chinese cartoons anon-kun. Don't make a cringy confession, it will just creep her out.

What you should do depends on your relationship with her. Do you talk to her regularly or occasionally? Do you hang out with her? Or you're just stalking her on facebook?

And stop with the suicide talk, it's becoming a cliche at this point. It's the kind of thing you'll laugh about a few years from now. At least if you stop with this silly mentality and get your shit together.

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Lil bump

>>18203191

You are so off base here you are not even asking the right questions. The real question should be "How do I take control of my own self and personal development. Is it not disturbing that you describe the problem as lack of rival or mentor and not the inability to follow through or low self confidence?

Understand that rivals and mentors are tools, and are to be used in such a way that accelerates YOUR development in an area that you so choose. It is a cause and effect. you say you need rivals and mentors do actually accomplish anything YET Actually accomplishing things are the avenue for acquiring both rivals and mentors!!!

You my friend have a problem, and I am 100% certain it is due to the lack of rivals and mentors.

>>18203498
Your advice is all based on the modern individualistic worldview. In the older times people were molded by their mentors. A group of males who challenge you is extremely important.

This is retarded

ask your doctor about modafinil and anipiracetam or shit any of the racetams. Phenylpiracetam is what I use for energy and memory, but it does help increase my focus. If you can get a script for modafinil (assuming you're USA) then you can buy adrafanil online but don't take that everyday because it will fuck your liver up if you do. Modafinil is the non amphetamine adderall adrafanil is the chemical that your liver synthesizes into modafanil. I'm obviously not a medical doctor so do your own research on nootropics and make sure your doctor is ok with you taking these supplements

>>18203252
I meant to say if you /cannot/ get a prescription for modafanil.

>>18203059

well what is the dream and what makes it impossible?

>>18203066
To be a loving, virtuous woman with an honest, respectful, strong, fun, and healthy husband.

It's impossible because I'm a guy and homosexuals are incapable of being healthy, respectful, or honest.

>>18203076

thats not a dream, thats a fantasy, and colloquially they have two completely different meanings.

if your dream is something that stupid, then yeah, realize its not actually a dream and move the fuck on.

>homosexuals are incapable of being healthy, respectful or honest

then maybe kill your self.

>>18203056

>dating a girl for 2 weeks
>she would be absolutely destroyed

thats her own fault for being retarded enough to get that invested in two weeks, what are you just goingto stay with her the rest of your fucking life just so she doens't have to deal with one two week break up?

stop creating imaginary problems for your self, you dont need an excuse other than 'i dont like you that way'.

>how do i know the difference between not truly liking osmeone and being afraid of commitment

hard to say, but just keep in mind that sometimes its not a 'fear' of commitment, its just a dislike of commitment, particularly to people who dont warrant it.

you dont NEED to be in a relationship. you dont NEED to date. its okay to be single. its okay to only date someone if you REALLY like them.

some people enjoy being single. osme people will give that up for the right guy or girl, but it doesn't mean you need to date any woman who wants to date youm even if there are romantic feeligns its okay ot just have fling.

>how do i get over a fear of commitment

generally, therapy.

>>18203084
You're probably right, I just feel really bad for leading her on. I don't even know if I could call it "leading on" since I was just exploring the relationship to figure out feelings and the logistics of dating. She lives an hour away from me, and we can only see each other once a week going forward. Also, and I don't know if this makes me an asshole, but every time we try to have sex, we have to stop almost immediately because it physically hurts her too much. Neither of us can get the other off in other ways, too, so bedroom life is basically dead. It's just really frustrating.

I might just be a bad person.

>>18203116

>i might just be a bad person

again, stop creating imaginary probvlems for your self. agreeing to a date does not make you suddenly responsible for the other persons happiness. everyone around you is serial dating, consatntly hooking up and breaking up over the most inane shit, and you think you're a 'bad person' just because you explored your feelings and didnt find ones that matched up with her?

there was a literal hitler, and a lot of people after that act just liek him, even in the day and age. killers, liars, thieves, people who would do this to the girl just to see how sad it makes her in the end.

but you think you're a bad person just becuase you gave it a try and it didn't work.

my boss likes to say that our generation has a lot of self esteem, but virtually no self worth.

self esteem is know what you are capable of doing, but self worth is knowing you deserve happiness becuase of it.

we are a generation raised to believe that its our job to take care of everyone else, were a generation who predicates every single favor we ask for with ' you dont have to do this and im sorry for asking, but if you do have the time i would appreciate it if you could maybe do this, but its okay if you don't.'

for a simple fucking favor. because we think we are so worthless that to even ask someone for a favor is a great burden.

you're not.

bamp D:

>>18203021
Which part in
>keep text to minimum, exchange phone numbers and set up meeting in person asap
you didnt understand?

>>18203133
just like that?

shouldn't I... uhh...

Well, she's 50. She's going to be hesitant about me being 30.

Shouldn't I phrase it in such a way that it convinces her to take a chance?