Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1818. page

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Vent, write letters you will never send, ask for advice. No contact fagging.

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Shat myself in BJJ, should I go back?

I've been doing BJJ for 2 years now and am trying to get my blue belt. Last week I agreed to spar with this 11 year old kid on his first lesson. Now I'm a 31 year old man, 6'0 and 135 lbs and to put it in perspective he comes up to my midsection in height and he tells me he's 60 lbs. So obviously I decide to go easy on him during sparring. During the 15 minutes neither of us got a tap out.

So next lesson I decide to go harder. I'm all attack and then suddenly he counters. I'm flat on my back and he's squeezing the life out of my neck with his legs. I decided to just try and lift up his legs since he's only 60 lbs but I couldn't budge them, turns out small and skinny white boy has disproportionally muscular legs that are probably bigger than mine and I'm serious. To make it worse he just grabbed one of my arms and was twisting it like crazy.

It was the most pain I've been in my BJJ career. I started loudly gagging and am tearing up. I really wanted to tap out but I just kept on thinking of how embarrassing tapping out to a 60 lbs kid would be and got knocked out instead. When I woke up, I discovered that I had shit myself. And yes, it was very noticeable (some of it went on the mat).

How in the hell am I supposed to go back now? I really want that blue belt but I don't want to be pitied by the class when going back. And if I move to another gym I'll lose all my white belt progress. Help!

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How do you convince your brain that it isn't in love with a fictional character?

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How do I get my gf back?
Before I explain the situation I would like to ask that no one tell me to give up or that its impossible or to move on. I understand that the chances are unlikely to be in my favor but I still want to try.

So my gf and I were on a break since April 5. It was suppose to be two months. She felt that I was too dependent on her and I had mental issues from past experiences I refused to get help with. After the break started I decided that instead of trying to deal with it on my own like usual I would go to a therapist which has helped me out immensely. I plan to keep going and we're working on getting antidepressants to help medicate my issues. I also did a lot of thinking about our relationship and why it didnt work out, ended up typing out a whole 5 page paper still ongoing.

She called me yesterday saying that that was going to be the last time we talked and that I wasnt the type of person she wanted in her life. Of course I argued because its hard for me to accept that. We talked for around 3 hours on phone discussing things on how we've both been doing and I told her how shes been doing and how I've been doing well and a lot of the insight I've been having.

This kinda eased her away from the whole I dont want you in my life thing. When we ended things I asked her to be clear on what was happening between us and that if possible I would like to talk to her more clearly in person to work things out. She told me that its up in the air again and that she would think about talking in person and trying to fix things but its still uncertain.

I'd say I made progress in getting her to slightly change her decision. Of course, I am willing to accept defeat, but I still want to try.

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Greetings from /pol/
Its been a while since ive posted on /adv/. After a while on /pol/, i think i have become quite racist. My family points out racist things i say, but the things i say are based off of statistics. idk what to do because i dont know if i am becoming racist or not.

This is coming from a hispanic anon, so the whole situation is weirder because of that fact

pic unrelated

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What's the benefit of getting married? You working your ass off to support a bunch of ungrateful brats and bitch wife who probably bored of you after a few years. Then in the end of the day, you're nothing but a fucking tool for other instead of living by all yourself, spending your hard earned money for yourself, taking no responsibility for other than yourself, do whatever the fuck you want as long it legal, no one will tell you what to do.

I'm 24 and I have a stable job with good income but I'm still alone, If I want to have sex I would just call for a prostitute.

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Why am I so scared to lose my girlfriend who wronged me multiple times and doesn't respect my feelings like she use to

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I am a guy and I just don't know how to express heterosexuality. Like what do men do to say to women "hey I am straight and not a murderer or rapist or kidnapper"

I feel very uncomfortable "coming onto" women because it feels kinda rapey.

I also ask for permission a lot out of respect. I will ask "do you want to go out with me?" Or "may I have your cell number?" Mostly because I feel that PUA tip of saying demands rather than asking is weird to me.

If some woman said "we are going out at 10pm" to me in a demanding tone, I would be put off.

Anyway, how does a heterosexual male show to a heterosexual female that he is heterosexual and would like to date her without it seeming creepy?

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I just spent half an hour being fucked and having my pussy licked and I spent most of that time staring at the ceiling or at the wall if it was doggy style

Is sex really this boring? People talk about it like it's amazing but I've never been so bored in my life

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lets make this a thing
just say the thing your most insecure about and then lets give each other advice
im insecure about my intelligence, drawing ability and body image
now are you man enough to talk about your own insecurities?

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im really starting to get desperate for intimacy. im 19 khv and completely CLUELESS about everything when it comes to dating. i have no experience except for 1 embarrassing date. no girl ever held my hand, no girl ever hugged me except once actually like 7 years ago, no girl ever said to my face that she has feelings for me. No kiss on my cheek or mouth or anything. Fucking nothing. Now i know to some of you gifted fellas out there who got their first gf at like 13 and started having sex since at 16 might think that it's not a big deal but it actually really is. having that constant feeling of rejection and loneliness takes a really big toll on your confidence especially after you turn 18. i mean i used to think that being a virgin isn't a big deal but now its fucking up with my mind. girls can apparently sense that in guys that they haven't gotten laid which is a turn off for them and its only gonna get worse with time. to be honest i feel like im just never gonna find anyone. i have almost no friends, i have a not so good body despite going to the gym (5'8 135 pounds ~11% bf) im not funny even when i try. also my job temporarily cut my hours so i just stay home most of the time now doing absolutely nothing other than watching tv shows like a fucking NEET which drives me crazy. also before anyone starts telling to start online dating, do you really think that i will find a worthy parter on a shitty free hookup app? I come on /adv/ and just reading a few threads about relationships make me tear up since it reminds me how sad and lonely i am no matter how much i improve myself. i don't know im just dead inside i just wish this nightmare could end but i just know its gonna be a long one. did any of you guys used to be like me but eventually managed to find love? if so, how? please halp me

tl;dr: im lonely i want a gf

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This is going to come off as a humble-brag and I am sorry for that, but I had a date today that I thought wasn't going well (she seemed bored, I wasn't really doing my best conversing, the restaurant was too lively for our mood, it was too hot outside, etc) so I figured at the end I would just go for broke and try to kiss her. Well we not only kissed but she came back to my apartment and we had sex, and arranged to meet some time next week.

Was I just so attractive she was willing to overlook the bad date and fuck me, or is she just an awkward slut?

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Does anyone else here feel soulless?

Seems like everyone is fundamentally different than me these days. People strive for a better life, money, companionship, or whatever they think will bring them peace. I've had all of those things, and I've never felt better for very long before I began to feel like shit. Even drugs were a limited time band-aide against my existential angst and self-destruction.

I don't want anything anymore. Not really, anyway. Not enough to get out of bed and get it.

Does anyone else look at the world with glossy eyes and feel nothing? I wish I could go back to being awed. I wish I could go back to feeling like I had control. I wish I could go back and feel like I have a purpose.

But I know I can't. Nothing will ever go back to what it was, and what it is now has only progressed further into itself. Like entropy, something whole within me has turned more chaotic until it's not even recognizable anymore. I don't think I can put it back together.

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So I just alienated my friends. All of them. Not that half a dozen is some inexplicable amount, but I just can't help but wonder why I'm such a fucking retard. I was really good friends with all of them, and we were hanging out regularly. That is until I started lying about not feeling well/being busy in order not to hang out. I'm not going to say that I didn't want to hang out with them, because I really did...but for some reason I kept getting anxious about going out, and I started self-sabotaging my social life. I just finished erasing all of my friends phone numbers and deleted them off snapchat and left their discord servers...and I couldn't tell you why.

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Am fifteen, turning sixteen soon. I have a foot fetish im ashamed of. Like a lot of sadistic brat kids, my female third cousin sometimes tries to make me smell her feet cause its "funny" to her. She is only 7 so I am beyond ashamed and embarrassed that she gets her feet all dirty, and then smothers my face with her feet and forces me to lick and sniff them. Im afraid one day she'll tell my family to embarrass me and ill be screwed. What do I do? succumb to my 3rd cousin and be her footslave for my entire life, or try to overcome this urge?