Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1439. page

It can't be worrying you that much if you'd rather ask on a japanese childrens cartoon image board than a doctor

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>>18418553
I think you should clarify that it is the advice section of said image board though.

>>18418551
Jesus Christ OP. Start eating healthy. Dem teef! Also, some fucking whitening toothpaste, a dental pick and some floss wouldnt hurt

read "how to stop worrying and start living" by dale carnegie.

>>18418557
Why don't you post the executive summary of your findings?

>>18418562
how do you ride a bike?
how do you learn to swim?
how do you learn to float on your back?
how do you learn to drive?
how do you make yourself go to work every day?
you don't learn any of this from just reading text on paper or in a book.

>>18418390

honestly if this is looking long term despite the issues id probably tell her to save as much as possible then pay for whatever she can't.

but try to push her to savfe as much as possible in the mean time.

>>18418398

on top of this maybe exclude a few things that she wanted to do but that you dont care for, that way shes still being 'punished' to some degree.

>>18418390
You need to put yourself in her shoes and know that at her age, and I was probably like her, i was recklessly spending. Random McD trips. Going to the mall every week. Its cause I wasn't an adult then. I didnt have rent, insurance, or cell phone to pay off. I can't really blame her.

>>18418353
I really couldn't capture it. Who are "they"? I can't understand you.

Fuck, I forgot that I'm retarded.
I always use they/them when talking about him, because I don't really like telling people that he's a guy.

>>18418353
you fell in love with someone toxic, move on

>>18418304
How old are you two? If its your first relationship you might be coming on too strong to her, feeling what you think is love when its something else.
If its hers, then she may be scared to take that step and acknowledge those feelings or hell she might not have them at all.

>>18418304
No, you shouldn't be worried. Everything seems fine. You're overthinking.

We're both in our early 20s. I've had 5 girlfriends and she has had 4. I've gone on numerous dates but never felt such a strong connection with someone like this while in a relationship. On our third date we made out for like 15 minutes.

She also says I'm the best thing to happen to her as she said she was used to dating trash but when she found me she enjoyed every moment of it. She texted me the next morning that I hope I have a great day and if we can't see each other we call everyday.

I'm basically alone, as i said. The other heirs don't care, one of them actively hates the other two, the other doesn't give a shit. My life is stressful and everyday my state of mind gets worse due to illness such as OCD, that i've had since childhood. I barely receive enough with inheritage-allowance to get by. Please help me. I don't know what to do. My life is being a shirtstorm and there's no peace in sight, or nowhere to go. I just want to leave this place and start again far from here.

Is there any family member you can trust? Any mentor or anyone to go to with these issues?

>>18418358
No one, even the people being paid, do much more than they think they can. No trustworthy family members at all. My parents raised us away from both their families because they knew of their nature.

Dont bother.

>>18418209
I would if our apartment building had security cameras, but I checked and didn't see any, so it seems kind of pointless

Knowledge wise you haven't seen anything. You're not even sure if it was a robbery, you just THINK it was.

Don't waste pollice resources chasing a ghost.

>>18417999

>why am i so incapable of planning things?

probably because:
> (you) get so anxious and overwhelmed that I end up breaking shit and turning into an asshole.

if your OCD is real, as in you are diagnosed by someone that isn't you, the internet, or generalassumptions from friends, then she should be more understanding, this isn't something you can just over power.

if by OCD you just mean you're a normal person who claims to have OCD, then yeah i can see why shes pissed.

>>18417999

>i have OCD
>whats wrong with me?
>i have OCD

hmmm.

>>18418002
No, I genuinely have OCD.

I have been diagnosed on 3 occasions.

>>18417987

>too lazy to swipe right for ten minutes a day
>should i give up?

yes.

>>18417987
>anime image
>i pretty much left swipe every stacy/white girl, and only right swipe bookish looking asian girls
>should i just give up?
Yes

>>18418016
i only left swipe white girls cause half of them are taller and thicker than me, plus they prob got stds and they're all in unappealing party dresses and look basic as fuck

>there are still people getting butthurt about henshin emergence by shindoL
maybe I'm just jaded but I think it's a 6/10 tops on the despair scale.
it's always funny seeing people who claim to love depressing shit get destroyed by it.

>>18417972

what happens in it?

link/name

>>18417888
Look at these boards for any period of time and you'll notice that that's the advice or belief that most guys on here try to follow...

Personally I think it's pretty dumb, it is what it is.

>>18417906
What advice?

>>18417912
Move on.

She thinks what she thinks, you think what you think

Ain't worth stressing about what's ultimately comes down to difference of opinion/personal philosophy.

>>18417838
Buy a fucking firearm.

>>18417838
Bring some friends, you faggot.

>>18417838
>None of my personal friends have agreed to accompany me since they're also anticipating violent behavior from this particular relative.
Get better friends.

I just put my mouth under the tap

the second.
the first is gross and might let water from your mouth flow back into the bottle.

autism

hobbys or workout. think of it like this, instead of wasting 30min-1 hour lashing your dong with your hand for a mere 10 seconds of climax, you could have used that time to pick up an interesting hobby and/or get gains.

I never lasted longer than 30 days, and most of my attempts were a failure. But when I almost passed 30 days, what helped me was:
1. Having a REALLY strong reason to do it. Trust me, you need it. Masturbation is an addiction like any other. It's worse than hard drugs (as cheesy as this might sound). Watch videos in the nofap community about the benefits of nofap and try to find out credible benefits that you would really like to get. (I recommend "Let's Talk Nofap" by Coterie. He basically stated that once you went long enough with it, you would feel like a god and even your voice would change and women would seem more interested in you. Sounded pretty great to me and motivated me, since I trust that youtuber and like his content. Another youtuber mentioned that your instincts will FORCE you to go out and meet chicks once you stop emptying your nuts like a maniac.

2. Count the days. There's something about numbers that just motivates you to keep going. Once you see the numbers going up, it feels like an accomplishment.

3. Baby steps. Challenge yourself to go one day without fapping (easier said than done if you're a porn/masturbation addict). Then try to go for a week (the first week it's gonna be hell, gets easier afterwards).

4. Don't even glance at anything erotic during the first weeks. Promise yourself you won't look at websites that contain anything erotic. Your willpower is not that strong.

That turned out to be quite long, but I followed those tips to succeed in nofap (although I didn't pass the 30 days mark). First and second tip are the most important. Good luck

So I've been nofap for something like 190 days before so I'll certainly be able to help.

After a certain point it will get very easy. I can't remember when exactly but if it's been say 60 days then you'll reach an all time low in libido and it'll stay like that permanently. Meanwhile, nofap starts off extremely difficult, peaking at 7 days. This is why people are able to reach ridiculous streaks no problem whilst you may struggle with getting to 7 days.

Identify what makes you fap and when/where you do and work around it. You may need to make some tough decisions. If you fap to hentai a lot then you may need to stay away from even anime or 4chan for a while if you know it'll remind you of that stuff.

Exercise is fantastic for lowering your libido so do something. Even 30 minutes of light working out is fine.

Don't fall into the trap of seeing wet dreams as release if you get em. You'll end up edging and fapping in the process of trying to influence your dreams.

>>18417723
I can relate since I've been through similar experiences like you.

I don't know if I really recovered, but I'm definitely in a better state than 2 years ago. Here's what I did so far to combat the anxieties:
- read self improvement books
- watch self improvement youtube videos
- forcing myself to go out into social activities
- get depressed when things not going as I'd like to
- sulking around for abit, but then realize sulking and standing will not going anywhere
- gradually try to not care if things not going as my "plan" or things, try to apply materials from self improvement blogs/videos to cover it
- rinse and repeat

>>18417749
can you recommend any specific videos or books?

honestly, I think I have a fairly good grip of my social anxiety when it comes to all the big things. I also go to social events like parties or even to clubs.

However, I notice that while other people are there and making connections and getting to know each other, I'm hardly making new acquaintances. Even if I force myself to attend a party, I can not bring myself to be very social while AT the party. Not because I don't like being with other people but because my mind always blanks out and I don't know what to say.

It's not that bad that I would be the creepy dude sitting on his own in the corner of the room. BUT it's usually not too far from that, either. I'm able to hold a conversation or a quick 1-2minutes smalltalk session with a stranger. But I'm not able to initiate it and that's a massive problem

>>18417764
That really sounds like me a year ago when I was in the early stage of trying to recover.

I think these books could help you a bit, have you tried:
1. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
I know it's stereotypical, but this book if I could say, will teach you in broad ways on how to do pleasantries while building a good rapport with people. When I blanks out and getting cold feet in party or gathering, advice from this book helps me.

2. Art of Sedution by Robert Greene
You might think this is mainly about pick up artists style seduction with women, but if you read it, it covers a lot about how to seduce lots of different kind of people, man and women along with historical examples and how to. Seduction after all is a part on nurturing a relationship friendly or sexual.

For blogs, this one http://www.inoveryourhead.net/2011/04/25/the-complete-guide-to-not-giving-a-fuck/ is the one that really jumpstart my journey to self-improvement.
For videos, not trying to promote it but youtube channel illacertus has lots of animated summaries of self-improvement book, you might want to check it.