Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1304. page

She's playing with your emotions. Just cut off contact with her and move on.

>>18469728
>>18469728
But...why?

She stated she's not interested in relationships, the first 3 minutes we met, when we went to the park.

I told her I have a girlfriend on our second meet.

What is there to play for?

>>18469722
OP here.

I had girls who liked me, loved me and overall, I talk to a lot of them.

But never, ever, ever have I seen somebody so undecided or so random, yet, so happy to see me.

On our third meet, I am legitimately not overreacting, she was jumping and screaming to see me, I never saw someone being so happy to see me, it was...weird. At the end, she hugged me, tells me "I'll call you in the next days!"

If she wanted to ignore me, she would've ignored my most recent "Hey, how's it going?", but she answered, yet she knew she didn't
have to, 'cause she didn't answer my other stuff.

What the fuck, /adv/?

The best financial decision you can make is to not date until you can support yourself comfortably. I'm guessing you're living with your mom because either you can't afford your own place or you are supporting her. In either case you shouldn't be diverting cash from your family to a girl that you are statistically unlikely to marry, and even less likely to stay married to until death. You are on a track to be successful, why prolong the amount of time you can't enjoy the rewards of your work? When you are better off financially you will have the luxury to date better women anyway. But that's just the advice of a random anon.

>>18469702
Honestly dude get yourself out there. I have a feeling your issue is making the first move. The sooner you make that move the better. Regardless how the relationship works out you'll get more self esteem and experience out of it.
>should I kill myself
Why would you ever want to do this? If you don't care about self preservation at least die on the battlefield for a worthy cause.

>>18470150

Yeah dude, just wait until you're 30 and have a ton of cash, then you can marry A̶ ̶n̶i̶c̶e̶ ̶g̶i̶r̶l̶(washed up Chad chaser, well out of her prime) and support her illegitimate children.

I'm in a 6 person houseshare at the moment, not a student anymore though but just underpaid / live slightly too near London. It's pretty bullshit. I don't really have a problem with the house or even the people really, but it's just clear to me that I'm not fit for living with other people. I need my space, I need to go mad in the kitchen on my own and make a mess and do stupid shit.

I was lucky enough to make good friends at university so living with them was okay despite the tendency for drama, but here it's worse because I simultaneously don't give a flying fuck about knowing these people but also don't want to be a "bad housemate" so I'm constantly self conscious and anxious and worry about them judging me.

I find it really hard to relax in my own home, and it's been almost two years. I pretty much just schedule all my cooking around unpopular times so I minimise the chances of having to cook / exist with other people. Two of them I'm reasonably friendly with, but only because they've been here a while. Most people move in and out frequently so even if I was a social butterfly there's not much point investing time in being friends with them. Honestly I would prefer the drama shitstorms of my uni days to this stale awkward prison I've made for myself.

>>18469737
Thank you for sharing this anon, if you could also share the biggest drama you had or witnessed during your uni house years please, I'd truly appreciate it since I could relate to it much more atm.
Also, where exactly are you near London? Just out of curiosity, because I am near London too, you don't have to answer this desu.

One of the my roommates stole and forged two checks from me for about $1200 while I was out of town on business.

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>>18469663
Do it anon. I browse on /pol/ all day and I want to do the same thing just try to get involved in politics and make sure that (((they))) don't shut you down.

>>18469691
Have you done anything in real life? I was thinking of going to a rally with a balaclava on so no one recognises me

I dunno man

I just need to do something with my life

I feel all this frustration and energy and I need to put it into something

>>18469663
I would recommend getting stoned. If it makes you feel any better, it's a crime almost everywhere. Bonus points if you start growing and selling weed.

>>18469657
Isn't there accomodation owned by the college? In most cases you can pay extra to live alone.

>>18469657
>without a job
Do you have ANY source of income? Living alone adds up quickly

>>18469676
No income but I do have $20 000 in my bank account that I've saved up from working in the past.

>>18469629
Dont be stupid. Your future employer will look into your social media and then hire somebody else.

Let the trash in bin and make new one with another fake name. Carl johnson is nice name.

>>18469637
>Your future employer will look into your social media and then hire somebody else.
Oh man, what are the chances I haven't been hired yet because of something like this? I use my current FB account as a joke account, and it's really easy to confirm it's mine as the same college is listed there and on my resume.

>>18469660
Well, only dumb people use social media with their real name on it while posting anything but offically and socially acceptable materials.

Also only dumb people have trouble getting jobs. So maybe it is just a coincidence?

>>18469594
It usually goes away without treatment, so, if you can stand the pain, you don't need a doctor, just wait some days and it will heal on its own.

>>18469594
dude, it's a dead nail, it's gonna be black, that's dried blood going to form a protective layer. gotta wait till it grows a new nail and old one falls off.

>>18469594
I got the exact same thing when I slammed my finger in the fridge door.

It's annoying because it looks gross but if you just leave it the old nail will eventually fall off and grow back again. All it needs is time

>please spend at least 13 hours and fifty dollars of fuel doing a service for me
>by the way there is no way I can compensate you asides from prostituting myself
>which will not happen
Tell her to get shit on

>>18469520
do it for the experience anon, sounds like you dont get out much. could be fun

Dont even respond. Like literally what the FUCK? You dont even know her. Shes just some bum ass bitch who thinks everyone should handle her problems for her. Shes a shitty human being and burned all her bridges in life so shes now so desperate to find new hosts to be a parasite off of that she is texting strangers with her bullshit. Let her fail. Not everyone deserves saving. Her destiny is to be a bag lady.

I wouldnt even drive that far for my best friend unless i was getting compensated massively. Even then it would be seen as me doing a huge favor. So yeah, refusing to be captain bitch boy for some old washed up hag is perfectly reasonable.

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>no friends
>live with parents
>worried about getting a girl

>>18469495
just bee yourself anon

>>18469495
>turned them down
Try to accept them on ask some girls on date yourself instead. When girls are chasing you, you have to be attractive.

>where
Try online dating. Try to play a game: you arent allowed to disagree.

Did you drunk much?

>>18469391
1. Sexuality is a choice. 2. Sex is a sacred bonding activity at least for the bottom depending.
Be you I gues Idk mate just know it's your life and accept your interests. No shame

>>18469460
I was drunk, but I think it just made more open to the idea. I don't know if being drunk was even the key to it or whatever.

>>18469486
>Sexuality is a choice.
I tend to agree. Especially after all this. But it was fine by me, so no shame here, just some confusion.

Me and my dad have managed to get a long better than ever, we agree on a lot of things and we enjoy each other's company but at the same time I began noticing certain patterns about my mom that just throw me off and it's hard to understand.
But ever since I've been trying to "rebuild" I've noticed that she has some really toxic behaviours and I cant just ignore it. One of the biggest issues is that she never pays attention to our conversations, she's always asking 4 or 5 times things that we had already disscused before, she's always making hurtfull comments like "we won the lottery with our kids" (in a sarcastic tone, after pointing out that I'm shy and quiet) and in general just toxic behaviour at all times.

I really don't want to keep up the fighting so now i just ignore the comments or try to brush it off as ignorance but sometimes they are too personal and it goes to the lenghts of even creating gossip about me inside the family.

My dad has become aware of this situation, we exchange looks everytime something like this happens but I just want it to stop, all i wanted was a nice relationship with mom and move on with my life, I really don't know what to do, I'm tired of it all and I don't want to distance myself from them alltogether because I really like the new bond with my dad and I really want that with my mom to.

I tried discussing it with her but she always dissmises me as a child, she would never listen to my advice on any subject just because she's older and the parent (she has said this herself, not making it up) and my dad is not really up for being in the middle of it and I don't want him to since i don't want to ruin what we have or worse cause problems in ther marriage.

Help?

P.S: Fix this fucking board already i get the connection error bug in both chrome and Firefox, its been like that for months.

Fuck her, she sounds like a bitch and you don't need a mom, you're already an adult.

>>18469383
I know she is, I could move on but not without trying everything, maybe someone else was in this situation and got her to be reasonable somehow?

Fuck man, I'm her child there must be some kind of boundry or way to make her wake up.

>>18469320
Well yes, you fucked up.

You don't know her. You're projecting a fantasy.

She's probably realized that she now has some sad, needy stranger acting dependent on her, and it's freaking her out or she's realized that it's not what she wants.

Your issues aren't about her. They're about your own fucked up thinking. I mean seriously, "oh, some girl is giving me a little attenion? Well shit, all of a sudden I don't actually want to kill myself." Doesn't that tell you something significant about your behavior and thought processes?

>>18469369
Yeah you are completly right.

But she used to forgive me and what if i just somehow tell her to forget everything i have said and just try to fix things because shes the type of a person that understands me.

>>18469435
>But she used to forgive me and what if i just somehow tell her to forget everything i have said and just try to fix things because shes the type of a person that understands me.

Do you imagine that telling someone to forget something means that they're going to actually forget it? If they come to some kind of conclusion about you, saying "forget it" means that they're going to still hold that conclusion?

You've known her for a month. While she might understand some things about you, SHE DOES NOT KNOW YOU, ANY MORE THAN YOU KNOW HER.

Again, you are projecting a fantasy.

Look, I know it's nice to think that some cute girl likes you and that you're going to live happily ever after, but a cute girl liking to talk to you or not liking to talk to you does NOT fix whatever's fucked up in your life.

What fixes that is YOU deciding to work on your problems and then putting in the work. I would suggest you see if there is mental health counseling available to you, and then taking advantage of it. You've already seen that a pretty small change in your life and that having a goal can radically change your outlook. Think about that and what is meaningful to you aside from being desperate for some girl.

What do you study? Is it interesting?

>>18469243
Motivation is bullshit OP. What's important is discipline. Do you think the grand master chess players are motivated to play chess every day? No, but they have the discipline to. Give up on the motivation meme, and take the discipline pill

I suspect that more than anything else you probably need a change of scenery. A master's is a lot of time to dump into something, and airy thoughts of future satisfaction might not keep you going that well through it.

Remember also that a career is not, in general, something you'll ever love. Your career is what keeps you financially stable and able to pursue your other passions, but it's not what you should be living for unless you're extremely lucky. I have a great job, one I like a fair bit as jobs go, and I'm still quite happy to come home at the end of the day. Get a career you don't mind, and spend your free time and free money living your life. If all you want from life is to not be bothered working, do the Mr. Money Mustache thing and save up all your money so you can retire before 40 - if nothing else, your career will hopefully let you save up that kind of cash faster than night-shift security will. If you want to get into skydiving or world travel or collecting Michelin stars, though, it'd probably be best to have a higher income to support those hobbies.

>>18469232
Oh yea the reason it's difficult for her to express herself is because of a language barrier

>>18469232
There really isn't one true answer here. You could express your feelings immediately and have a great month or a shitty month. Or you could wait. I don't know.

>>18469232
I know you've blacked it out, but that's King's Cross Station in London isn't it?

I'm pretty damn sure it is because I used to live in London and went past it many times

At the very least, it looks very similar to KX, so I think it is.

As for the girl, just ask her out on a fucking date man, that's what I've done in the past even though I'm proper shite with girls.

Tell him "well you can keep me on the payroll if you want, but I'm not showing up any more after this date"

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Just tell him he'll understand.... probably

>>18469173

2 weeks notice is mere courtesy on your behalf and the entire reason to give it is to allow your employer the time to set things up for your departure. It's not your fault your work is fucked. Just leave.