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Hey /adv/. This will probably be a long one, so this may have to come out in multiple posts.
I have a step-son whom I shall call 'David'. I have known since he was 11. He is currently 18. His real dad literally wrote him off when he was 6-9 months old and hasn't made any effort to contact David. About two months ago, David decides he wants to contact his real dad. I have been letting David take the reins of his own life lately, so I don't have a problem with this, and his mother always said that she would never stand in the way of David wanting to see his own dad, so she facilitated it. David met his real dad and his real dad's family, and for all intents and purposes life continued going well with the addition of David's real dad's family now being a part of his life.
Now David has been planning on doing something in mechanical engineering, getting just an associates first and then going from there. He's been looking into mechanical engineering for years, since his freshmen year in high school. He's been involved in building hovercraft projects, underwater submersibles, etc.
About 3 weeks ago now, David goes to stay with his real dad for 2 weeks. At the airport on the day he flies out, we joke with him saying, 'Now you're not going to changing your mind and going to college there, changing your name, and leaving us in the dust, are you?' He swears that that will never happen. At best, he will get his associates here and then look into getting his bachelors there. We have no problem with this. He leaves to go on his 2 week vaca with his real dad.
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>(continued - part 2)
5 days into his vaca, he texts his mom. He's changed his mind, and is going to a community college over there. The college offers a general engineering degree that's more geared towards maintenance than it is mechanical engineering, but however assuming his grades are kept up will allow him to directly rollover to the local university. The only downside is that had he gone to school here for 2 years, it would cost him ~$4,000 including fees and books, but by going there it will cost him between $13,000 and $16,000 NOT including fees or books.
We also learn that he's been spending a lot of time with his half-brother, whom we will call Steve. Steve is essentially a fuckboy. He details premium cars for a living, and otherwise spends most of his days partying, getting laid, getting drunk, and getting high. He apparently helps David lose his virginity and get high for the first time (David's been drunk before though). David's real dad knows he parties, but otherwise doesn't know of the extent or details.
David has a very horse-with-blinders-on mentality in that if he has any distractions to a goal, the goal will almost certainly suffer. There was a few times in his 4 years of high school where his grades started suffering, and the conclusion we came to was that there was a correlation between his grades plummeting and how much freedom he had on the internet. I restricted his internet freedom to certain times of the day, his grades would climb. I restricted him completely, and his grades were perfectly fine, not straight A's, but at least solid B's, and a couple C's from time-to-time.
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Wow helicopter control freak parent much!!
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jesus christ, OP
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I found out I am pregnant and decided to get an abortion. I am going to call planned parenthood tomorrow and set an appointment. I am scared to death of the procedure and never wanted to ever have a child. This is a nightmare come true and I think I am having a bad pregnancy anyway because of the severe pain I have been in. How do I calm down? Since I found out I can't stop crying. I feel scared knowing something is inside of me. I know most are anti-abortion on here but I don't know how to view this rationally. I can't take this knowing my worst nightmare has come true.
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First of all... If you're so scared of getting preg, how did you end up like this? Or you got scared once you found out?
Also, what kind of advice are you looking for? Seems to me you already found a solution.
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>>18477085
You need a real life friend to help you through this. Do you have anyone?
Take a moment to just breath. Millions of women have experienced what you're experiencing now. Its normal to feel this way. You will be okay.
>>18477088
Read the OP, she is asking how to cope emotionally because she is freaking out.
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>>18477085
Your killing a person remember that. You were reckless enough you couldn't keep it in your pants. And now an innocent life has to pay for that mistake. Your a horrible person. I'm not even religious.
Anonymous
I can't seem to understand social cues 2017-07-02 10:33:19 Post No.18477024
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I can't seem to understand social cues 2017-07-02 10:33:19 Post No.18477024
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I can't seem to understand social cues
Anonymous
2017-07-02 10:33:19
Post No. 18477024
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Both visually and in text.
I can only understand people if they are honest, without a lot of subtlety or hinting.
For example-
>Date with a girl
>Had a lot of fun, the movie sucked tho
>Didn't kiss her cus I didn't know when the right time was (Despite literally sitting next to her while waiting for her bus)
>She tells me a day after "I really wanted to make out with you"
>"Oh"
Or another example
>Ask a girl out
>"Let's go out sometime"
>She answers "Yeah sure"
>Couple of days later I become AUTISMO the autist
>"Wait, did she think I meant it in a Platonic way? Is it not a date? I needed to flirt? Wait what!?"
>Had to ask her bestie if she understood I meant it romantically
>She answers "Yeah, don't worry. She understood it. Stop worrying so much."
>Finally calm down from being AUTISMO the autist.
How do I finally understand social situations without worrying? This issue has fucked me over many times.
I'm not an introvert or something, I'm rather outgoing and I expose myself to PLENTY of social situations, yet I never get the grasp of it.
pic related I'm Jewish (I'm secular)
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>>18477024
Yep ... autism
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>>18477030
I dunno. I met people who were officially diagnosed with Aspergers, they were wayyyy odder than me.
Still, think I should get checked?
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OP here - adding some more info
>My friends tell me I'm too honest and harsh
>I also don't "feel" the same way they do, like sadness or missing people. These two emotions are an example for "foreign concepts" to me
>Get depressed a lot
>Recently get anxiety a lot
Would you work during summer (Work is relevant to you field of study) or take a vacation and travel?
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>>18477022
Let's say that you are pursuing a degree in a business field (ie. accounting, economics, finance, information technology, etc..)
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>>18477063
4 months of vacation is a bit much.
But the again
>accounting, economics, finance
sounds so boring I'd probably stay away from it as long as I possibly could.
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>>18477073
Well it's more like 2 months.
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I'm 28 years old.
I have had one gf when I was 19, it lasted about 6 months.
I am successful at my job. I have been careful with my money, I have bought my own house.
But I am lonely. All my friends from school and university moved away. I have work colleagues who I'm friendly with but not in the way of let's go out. Unless as a work social.
The few close friends I do have are hitched with wags.
How do I make that step to meeting new people? Where do I go? Is meeting people at a gym an option? Or is it really a solitary thing?
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>>18477017
Go any where and everywhere join a gym sporting event or do to general social events. Pick up a hobby that gets you to see a lot of new faces. They won't come to you.
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>>18477075
>>18477017
Not OP but in a similar situation.
What kind of activities, events or whatever are the best ones to meet other people? People you can go out with and meet girls, I mean.
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>>18477017
>>18477103
Why are you doing this to yourselves. Go find a whore and make sure you fuck anywhere but your place.
>Got life together, settled and in a good place.
>Introducing a woman to that.
Not even once.
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Guys, tell me if I made a mistake or of I'm just overthinking things (as usual haha)
So i have this crush that I've been flirting with for some time and it's been going really well, the past 2 "dates" has had some skyhigh "go in for the kiss moments"... but I didn't, not because of chickenry mind you.
>I am (was) very confident about it's success.
The issue was timing really: She was gonna leave for a 6 week vacation shortly after these dates and so, I made the decision that I was gonna wait until she comes back.
>Maybe helpful:
She texted me the morning she was gonna leave a very long and cute message.
>"I'm really going to miss you Anon, You are the best person I know and I always look forward to seeing you when we have plans, sorry to put that kind of pressure on you but Thank you so much for always being there for me!"
>"This made much more sense in my head haha, much more coherent but it needed to be said before I leave so there it is <3"
So she's been gone for about a week now and we've been talking a little (timezones makes it difficult) but she's meeting people and having a great time and Well: I get jealous! What if she forgets about me while hanging with all these "awesome people" what if she finds a guy!!!!
I mean she's attractive, intrest will exist!!
Did I do the right thing to wait?
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>>18476983
Are you a girl? You type like an excited schoolgirl. But nevertheless, I think you blew it all. All the "magic" between you will just die out in 6 weeks, and one of you will not be interested in another anymore.
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You need to hope from now on. You should have kissed her to make sure the fire keeps burning.
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>>18477009
I'm not a girl not do I go to school.
Maybe you read it wrong.
But thanks for your input on what is actually relevant to my intrest.
So follow up question: how do I keep intrest up?
Anonymous
I got a girlfriend and it made me even more unhappy 2017-07-02 09:36:28 Post No.18476957
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I got a girlfriend and it made me even more unhappy 2017-07-02 09:36:28 Post No.18476957
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I got a girlfriend and it made me even more unhappy
Anonymous
2017-07-02 09:36:28
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I am 18 years old and I have gotten a girlfriend for the first time in my life.
We've been together for three months, the first two were great (mainly because I probably didn't have deep feelings for her at that time and thus didn't really care about issues that might worry me in the future).
Now the last month has been full of ups and downs.
I am her fourth boyfriend, third person she had sex with and 7th boy she gave blowjob to.
That is what makes me worried.
I am always a perfectionist and I always imagined a person I'd be with as pure, virgin and of high intellect - something I feel like she lacks.
On the other hand, she is beautiful and I have many things in common with her and I don't think I know a girl that suits me more.
What worries me most about her is her lack of self-control.
She once gave a blowjob while drunk to a random boy in a club - something that makes me disgusted - something that makes me feel like she doesn't deserve me (never really did anything like that and always considered girls who did this as whores).
She claims the usual:
>I was after break up
>it was a mistake
>I was drunk
>I regret it
but obviously that reasoning doesn't satisfy me and I still have an urge to break up and feel free and wait for the perfect girlfriend for me
at the same time I am worried that this might be the perfect girl for me since the issues aren't anything fatal?
Please help
>tl;dr: I don't know if I should break up with a gf because she doesn't have the same amount of self-respect that my ideal gf in my mind should have because she gave a BJ to a random guy in a club one month before we met and stayed with abusive boyfriends in the past
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Break up with her then. But if she's a great fit for you then you might regret it given that there aren't many '''pure girls''' out there that will fit your description.
Do you want your ideal gf to be a virgin? Or how many guys can she have fucked before it becomes too much?
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Be honest: do you ACTUALLY think you could land a girl like you want? If so, why'd you 'settle'?
Also what does being a 'pure virgin' have to do with intellect?
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>>18476961
Exactly. I don't think there are many 'pure girls' out there - or rather I can't say for sure but I think I am way too young to judge that.
My girlfriend is involved in club, partying etc which is why she has so many past experiences but if I were to look for my girlfriend somewhere else, I might find more pure girls.
No, not pure virgin. Although that would be nice, casual sex is what bothers me the most on my ideal girlfriend I think.
>>18476962
I think it's possible. Before meeting this girl I never ever wanted to have relationship since I thought the classic 4chan's
>hurr durr all girls are whores
but now I realized it's not the case for every single girl and if I actively tried to find the ideal girl - I would have a chance.
Also intellect has nothing with being pure virgin - I just put it out there since I feel like my girlfriend is little stubborn and I can't intellectually connect with her as I'd like to (for an example she doesn't like discussing problems etc).
Anonymous
How do I tell my family I don't believe in their religion? 2017-07-02 09:29:07 Post No.18476945
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How do I tell my family I don't believe in their religion? 2017-07-02 09:29:07 Post No.18476945
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How do I tell my family I don't believe in their religion?
Anonymous
2017-07-02 09:29:07
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I grew up in a Christian household and still am. I am 18 years old now and decided that I don't want to follow my family's path. But I have not told my family and my parents know my older siblings are not going to follow their beliefs but they count on me so much and my younger sibling and they would be very devastated if I told them this. I need help, I have been thinking like this since I was 14 and honestly I don't know what to do.
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>don't you worry. You have the right to think what You want
>all religions are scam
>a belief is just a thought you keep thinking
>so you can change this by thinking other things.
>just stay true to your self
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You don't have to tell them anything. Why make it a point to tell them like some fag who needs to tell his family he's a queer?
I used to doubt religion as well but I know for a fact now that God exists and that there a lot of spirits and such all around. What I am unsure of is any particular religion being right, but God and the spiritual world does exists and faith as well.
There will be a lot of fedora tipping but I have no interest in showing anyone that God exists, not really my concern what others think
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Here is some unbiased advice friend.
Believe in what you want but religion is a tricky subject. I grew up in similar family went to catholic elementary school high school and at one point sort of believed in god.
I became depressed becuse i knew something wasnt right with it so kind of spiraled from there. You should stick with your feelings instead of living a lie. If you even try to force yourself to believe something there is merit to insanity.
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>le 26 yo middle eastern refugee fag
>unhcr says fuck you, can't help you
>can't return home
>can't work legally without risk of deportation
wat do anons?
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>>18476942
>>can't return home
>>can't work legally without risk of deportation
>deportation
so you can go home, for free no less.
go home achmed.
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>>18476942
>he fell for the refuge meme
Deportation is your only choice.
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>>18476942
Kys and all the other rapefugees please
I work at good will. sometimes i am the who is left in charge of the shift if the manager isnt there for whatever reason.
once in a blue moon one of the cute girls i work with reports that she suspects someone may be shoplifting or someone is acting shady.
personally idgaf cos im in freaking retail ffs. its not like uts my own company or shop. plus we get shit for free and i really dont give a fuck.
anyways do the cute girls think less of me for not confronting or doing anything about these suspected shoplifters?
like what do they expect me to do? cowboy up over some free shit we got and are selling for $1?
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>>18476856
You could get fired for not taking your job seriously. If you are in charge, you're responsible for dealing with shoplifters according to the store's policy.
So yeah, either cowboy up or make sure your manager doesn't find out.
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>>18476856
The cute girls, the ugly girls and everyone else thinks you're a pussy for not manning up and dealing with the situation. So yeah, you'll come across as a lazy ass who doesn't give a shit about anything but himself and won't do anything he doesn't have to. Everybody is looking for that.
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>>18476856
I think if you didn't see it personally you can't do anything, you should just tell them that and pretend you don't see it otherwise if you don't wanna deal with it
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How do you deal with your stress, anons?
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I try to distract myself.
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By learning that it's good for you.
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Read the stoics, buddhist philosophy, start vipassana meditation and apply the principles of meditation and why it is good to your everyday life.
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Is it wrong to infect people with diseases intentionally?
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Yes. Very. Why do you have to ask the answer to this question? Shouldn't it be obvious?
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>>18476765
Yes.
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>>18476775
Well I put something in someone's food. They don't know it was me. They never will.
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What's a good job for a stupid loser shut-in? Asking for a friend.
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>>18476757
Retail or pizza
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>>18476757
any job that will take you
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Overnight factory work. Bonus points if your tucked in the corner and you can listen to music and if you dont mind repetitive tasks. Anything overnight is comfy if your a shut in.
Anonymous
How do I ask a pre-divorced woman how she feels about me? 2017-07-02 07:40:55 Post No.18476674
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How do I ask a pre-divorced woman how she feels about me? 2017-07-02 07:40:55 Post No.18476674
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How do I ask a pre-divorced woman how she feels about me?
Anonymous
2017-07-02 07:40:55
Post No. 18476674
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I'll keep it very brief. Best friend for the past year. We're in college, she got married to an army guy many states away before we met, and is divorcing him as of a month ago because she realizes she'd be miserable staying with him. Since a few months before she told me she's divorcing him, she's been friendlier with me, borderline flirty (A lot more physical), friends think she's interested in me, noting we have chemistry together, and we've been hanging out more.
She's divorcing him but hasn't made any of the steps yet to do so, as far as I know. I'm thoroughly convinced she has feelings for me, but
>Would it be crossing the line if I made a move (kiss) on her, or should I just ask her "How do you feel about me?"
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>>18476674
>"""pre divorced""" broad
>kek
You're crazy for even wanting to get involved with that
Women like these come with a lot of drama
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>>18476674
Just get a little drunk with her and go out for it.
Making out is no big fucking deal, it's not even cheating.
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>>18476674
You don't.
You ask her out just like any other girl.
If she's uncomfortable with the idea, she'll say so or find an excuse just like any other girl.
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living with three girls in a four bedroom next semester. I'm a guy. any advice?
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masturbate on bed dont touch girls
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>>18476647
Jerk off on their pillows(pillowcase off) and let your semen permeate them.
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Hide your own toilet paper. Never let them know you have it. Also, their periods will start to sync up and then I recommend being out of the house around the time they're all bloating