I'm trying to discover a new job different from my previous profession.
I was a programmer but a very shitty one.
worked for about 9 months, developing on apps.
right now, i need to find a job that's simple.
the requirements are
>low paying doesn't matter
>low working hours / zero OT
>doesn't require experiences to start or provide training
>don't require physical strength
Introduce me some jobs that fit the above so i can look for them.
I just gave a female acquaintance who I am highly infatuated with my phone number and asked her to call me if she if she'd like to go out for coffee or something to eat some time soon.
Femanons, do you like to make a guy wait a day or two? When is it time to accept that a call isn't incoming?
The common consensus is that you wait a day or two isn't it? Call too early and you appear desperate. I think it could be societal hokum but it would make sense. Especially if you're infatuated as you say, also be careful with that; infatuation is a cheap counterfeit of love.
My in laws asked my husband to consign on a mortgage for them when they have horrible credit and no savings. I told him it's a horrible idea and not to do it, but he is going home in a few months to visit by himself and I feel like he may do it. He already told them yes without talking to me or researching it, and has yet to tell them no. Can he consign without my knowledge or signature? They're from Florida.
His mother is really good at guilt tripping him into giving them money. It's pissing me off that they would even ask this.
>>18493688
If your hubby is so easy to manipulate, use manipulation first and simply tell him that giving his and your money to his family will be end of marriage.
>if you dont have kids yet, this is probably good sign to break up and divorce before he gets ass deep into loans hell
Yes, he can sign anything by his own name.
Damn, that's what I figured. He has already been their go to for money since he his the oldest and in the military. I haven't said anything yet because I'm also Hispanic and understand helping family , but my family would never cross this line. I honestly feel like like its super shady because they know they don't have the money or savings to back it up.
Thanks! I was having trouble, but I will bring this ultimatum up. I stressing me out and I can't move forward without a definite no.
Fortunately we don't have kids yet. I love him a lot, but I won't sit by and let them ruin my future.
>>18493688
Mortgage means death pledge. Really makes you think.
A friend of mine lives in Hamburg at the area where the riots happend/ are happening.
I want to text her whether shes ok. How to phrase it?
http://www.spiegel.de/video/krawalle-beim-g20-gipfel-brandstiftungen-in-hamburg-video-1780781.html
video related
bumb
>>18493672
hey how are you doing with all the recent shenanigens in hamburg?
Been pooping in my toilet, difficulty getting poo out but it triggers my body heat rise dramatically and causes me to nearly faint (my eyes were blacking out and my head felt really light).
The doctors are making me wait til 6pm before they will check me out, what can I do anons? I'm currently sitting in a cold bath to try to regulate my body temperature but it still manages to keep on rising and it's making me anxious, please help anons.
>>18493668
if you fap that should actually cool you off enough. otherwise if youre a girl you are just screwed
Eat more fiber and take laxatives
>>18493707
Already eat cereal full of fibre and have this fibre drink, still this happens fml
I have just come to realization that I might be an infantile man, or manchild. I tend to avoid responsibillity, I am not able to apply skills into practice and instead I just intellectualize everything, thinking about some higher matter without being able to apply it. In real life, when time comes to take responsibillity, I evade it furiously. Feels like I am always waiting for the moment when "true woman comes", "no sense to try until I'll be invited to work on something grandiose", and until I have a chance and possibility, I won't do anything. Long time ago, girlfriend broke up with me for exact the same reason. She was mature beyond her years, and what I have heard from her was somewhat similar to what I have described, moreover, she felt I was not able to make coherent decisions, always changing my mind as if it was a pendulum. I feel I've been entrapped by my passiveness, life that hadn't been lived was accumulated in my psyche. I have been living entirely alone for a year, but if I had any possibility to be dependent on someone, I'd have already fallen into that way of living. I am studying, but living mostly on my parents' savings. If I am bored, I am trying to get out of the routine, I spend money mindlessly, but mostly on food. In my free time, I start to daydream about genius things I would create if I started to work. These thoughts became so vivid, I spend three or four hours on developing them, that's my hobby.
Having addressed the issue, is it possible to break the pattern? Any tips? Does it feel somewhat familiar to you?
picrandom
bump
inb4 kys
Your age?
>>18493720
19, soon to be 20.
How bad is Harlem in Manhattan? Rent prices are twice smaller than in the middle/lower part of the borough and the apartments are newly built/renovated, something which can't be said about the former. Or would it be better to look towards Brooklyn instead? Is it safe, considering the proximity to the Bronx? (I'm a scrawny manlet—I can't win a fight.)
How would you feel if your gf wanted to leave jobs, buy a farm in a pretty & secluded area and begin a goat farm?
>>18493636
I would feel proud as fuck. Thats what I want to do.
>>18493636
I would question her sanity and my choice of partners.
>>18493646
What do you find weird about it?
This is my first time using this thread, thanks in advance for any replies.
So 2 days ago at a party i broke up with my girlfriend (of just over 2 months) because i couldnt handle the amount of stress she put on my life, plus she kinda had a blatant disregard for things that were important to me - so i ended it when she (as usual) started interrogating me about my feelings towards her.
She was drunk, I was sober and had been planning this for a few weeks. She proceeded to tell me she hated me, that she had cut herself because of me, and had tried to kill herself by OD'ing on pills. She suffers from anxiety, panic attacks, depression and sees a psychologist every month, and the last thing I want to do is to hurt her more.
And all i've done is just that. I bawled my eyes out.
Am I to blame for what she has done, and/or possibly will do to herself? My greatest fear is going to uni tomorrow and hearing she'd killed herself and it being my fault.
It's not your fault. Other people will tell you this same thing now in different and more words.
>>18493635
Well she sees a psychologist which is probably more capable to help her than anyone in here.
Consider telling her parents/family about this. Especially if you don't want to be involved with her in any capacity anymore.
I'm thinking about taking a break from school to sort myself out, but I don't know what I should do during it.
Basically I want to figure out what I want to do with my life, because right now I have no purpose or direction. I'm not passionate about anything, other than socializing and romance. That's not to say I'm totally apathetic, I have several hobbies I enjoy and like my field of study. I just don't "love" any of them, and when I try to make myself love them I end up burnt out. Silly as it may sound, this isn't enough to keep me going, I soon slip into boredom and depression. I guess my psyche just works in such a way that I need some driving motivation to function.
I can't keep going like this or I'm going to have a breakdown. I'm only just maintaining a grip on my mental health as is.
But what should I do to help myself?
My school is pretty chill about people taking breaks, so I'm not going to torpedo my future by doing this.
Any insight is appreciated!
Hmm if you're passionate about socializing and romance, you might be good at being a marriage counselor.
I went to psychologists yesterday, and she told me that I should write a "plan" of the day with things I want to do, and then stick to the plan.
What do you think I should write there and do? So far I have
- wake up at 7am
- morning hygiene
- programming for 5 hours ( I don't work )
- gym / cardio
Is this enought? What habbit am I missing? I think I should add some kind of a social habit, like meeting a friend - but should I do it every day?
I was told not to practice meditation for the time being, so that's why it's not included.
>>18493615
I don't know enough about you to say, but that sounds like enough for now. Just stick with it for at least 3 weeks, because that's how long it's supposed to take to build a habit. If you're successful, then add more habits from there.
Seems odd that you were told not to practice meditation. Did she give a specific reason?
>>18493615
I did a plan, it was :
Stop cannabis
Stop Alcohol
Get a GF
Wake up morning
I was like you, and you know what? it worked.
Something helped me a lot more too :
Do something you love (being passionate is very important in life and people tend to forget it) if you realy enjoy something, you'll be happy, and being happy is the key to success for me :)
>>18493615
First, schedule the things that affect your sleep patterns. You have "wake up" (a bit late in my opinion, but it's your plan) but not "go to bed." Schedule that too. Your body also depends on meals and glucose levels to regulate sleep, so schedule your meals. Now schedule in gym for a specific time. Finally, schedule in the hours for your programming. Everything should have specific times attached. The key is specificity.
How does one who hate people make new friends and most importantly, find a long standing relationship with beautiful loving women?
I'm 30, I've no close friends that would hang out with me (friends I consider close have wives and don't spend time with other boys alone). I'm angry. I was used by one women for past year and all I'm left with are depressions. I spend at least hour a day thinking about suicide. It just seems like easy way out of this sometimes. Sure, I can eat, play games, fap to Internet porn. I'm living in great luxury compared to some other people. But I don't consider it a well spent time. I dream of relationship, family, happiness. How can one get even close when my state of mind is constantly like that? People don't like me and I can understand why. I'm quiet, it takes too much before I open myself and have fun... You can call me beta and that's what I am.
I'm trying to run now and travel alone. But when I'm alone, that feeling always comes back. I walk in forest in national park, beautiful nature, pleasant wind, and my mind is occupied by that pseudo-relationship, by that bitch that used me, and I thought I loved her, and I won't find...
You don't hate people, clearly, but you have adopted some misanthropic thoughts by being wronged by someone. All I know is if you want something it will come but you have to accept you want it and then stop thinking about this thing. Not only will you diminish your chance of success by overthinking but you will also be perceived as 'dependently offensive' to the opposite gender (Or, you know, a potential partner let's say). If you're unable to be amongst nature and completely let your mind be absorbed in the present then you're basically just going to wind up in this vicious circle; that is to want for someone but to destory your chances of finding them by obsessing with these thoughts. You have to let your mind be free with practice and strict deliberation.
When you have these thoughts arise recognise them and and watch them float by like clouds, impermanent and passing, then pay attention to yourself and the world around you (What physical sensations does the climate affect,how does it feel to breathe oxygen in and out of your lungs, what particular sounds are around you and what can you hear etc)
Heavily suggest nofap. Just go one week and tell me you're not 100% more motivated to get out there and meet people. It will make a difference to your mindset i promise you
Thank you for your support anons. I realize I wouldn't be a good husband and father in my current state of mind.
I'm going for a beer with friend I wasn't at beer with for a long time. Hopefully, we're gonna talk about something else.
TLDR: How to stop infatuation to fuck up my life
I'm a succesful (job with very good prospects, getting close to 100k a year) male anon, decent looking (bit chubby, but apparently super cute face). I speak 3 languages fluently, i'm very respectful, play an instrument and get plenty of dates.
Problem is, whenever i start dating somebody that i connect with, i get insanely infatuated. I become obsessed with a person. My mind will be racing 24/7 waiting for the next text from this person. When it takes a few hours, all kinds of scenarios pop up in my head. I'm no double-texter, i have the discipline to wait until she texts me. But it fucks with me so hard.
Then after a month i get bored and break up.
However, this process happens every time. How do i stop it? I get plenty of dates but i'm ruining my own life going on these dates. It fucks with my head so much.
I tend to date below my standards as i just want somebody to cudde and feel secure with. I'm chasing that feeling.
Anybody? :/
>>18493633
>>18493593
>bit chubby
>respectful
>play instrument from overbearing parents
>speaks 3 languages and that's all
sounds like you're bored of yourself and you want someone else that's interesting to take over your life.
it's cool you already have some skills but you aren't supposed to stay static as a person.
>>18493593
>Then after a month i get bored and break up.
Maybe don't break up then? And try seeing the other person as more than just what they can do for you.
What exactly is the advice you're seeking, you're basically humblebragging. You also sound very immature.
Alternatively, try dating someone you wouldn't or who's not "your type". On one hand it would solve the infatuation "problem" and you might discover something about yourself in the process.
Ive been running for about three months to prepare for joining the marine corps. I would do both treadmill and outside. On a good day on the treadmill i can ran 6.8 mph for 15 mins non stop. I have never been able to do that outside ever, and even after all the training ive done, i still have some days where i cant even run a half mile outside.
Feels bad man. I feel like i cant do this sometimes.
>INB4 fat
Im not fat
>INB4 something other than usmc
To even think there would be something else out there for me is a bad joke
Why can't you run outside? What makes running outside feel any different?
>>18493576
I've gone from running shitty 9 min miles to 5 min miles.
For training on the treadmill it helps immensely to listen to some music, I get irritated running without music.
Also drink only water, bubbly water if you desire a texture. Water helps a ton.
Keep track of small improvements and increase the intensity of the workout every day or week. take pride in small amounts of change within your running times. Seconds add to minutes and so forth. Overall , be healthy
You know Marines do more than just running, right? I have no idea how this is supposed to prepare you for USMC and yet you won't even consider doing anything else with your life.
its okay when i talk woman but when i try to ask them out i just cant my legs shake i get super nervous like a 12 yo teen im 21 yo i didnt have many girl friends who it was the girl do first move im tired of every girl i like taken by chads howi beat that anxiety?
Practice. Talking to women is like any other skill. The more you do it, the better you'll get. It's like driving a car, the first time most people are nervous as hell, but after awhile it becomes second nature. Have patience with yourself and keep trying.