>>161929744
Kill myself.
My desk is a bit unsteady. One of the legs is too short. I think the Death Note is just thick enough to fix the problem.
>>161929744
Jerk off on it first, then give a bunch of thots a heart attack.
>>161929744
Write "OP" and then never touch it again.
>>161929744
Decapitate the school bully.
>>161930145
But you will kill 4chan!
>>161929845
/thread
>>161929744
suicide
>>161929744
Test it on some corrupt politician or something outside of my country and make sure to not get caught as easily as Light was. He made some retarded mistakes.
>>161929744
Probably kill a few of the obviously corrupt politicians. Hopefully it'd bring the others in line.
Google search the wealthiest kikes
>>161929744
rob a bank, travel the world, bang some chicks, eat good food
>>161930174
who somehow ended up getting a top tier carrier and now makes insane bucks and seems to have it all? Yup
Try to exterminate humanity.
>>161929744
End the entire world because the fact that a death note exists means the human race is fucking garbage for allowing something this retarded to exist.
>>161929845
/Thread
Spend an afternoon making infinite paper planes and then throwing them off the roof of a tall building. Might also write instructions for use on it but lie about the face thing.
Then I wear a mask for the rest of my life.
>>161929845
first post best post
>>161930145
You need OP's name and face for it to work though silly.
Write Miura's name in it and have him work at a normal pace on the Berserk manga until he's finished the series then die of natural causes at the age of 90
If that works I'd do the hunter x hunter guy next
>>161931784
Even with the shinigami eyes for maximum efficiency, wouldn't you eventually just drive humanity into hiding?
>>161929744
Doing credible deaths and let people think it's all just accidents
>>161929744
hot glue it
Be the God of a new world
>>161931911
Maybe, and there's no way I'll live long enough to get the job done, but a man can dream.
>>161929744
basically murder everybody who ever wronged me and finally have complete peace of mind.
every asshole and cunt will die horribly and slow by extremely painful cancer.
Kill every politician on this world except for those in Sri Lanka because I can't figure out how to write their names
>>161929744
become rich and kill some classmates just because
>>161932072
If you can get a shinigami to save your life, you can get its remaining lifespan. Do you have what it takes?
world war 3 battle royale
get the world leaders to ignore all political matters and just duke it out with each other, ally or not
>>161932176
>>161932213
Hang on, do you want to tell me he's serious?
>>161929744
Use the pages for origami.
Kill bad people, like obama.
>>161931551
>would've never been caught if he didnt kill the FBI
Fuck politics. I just want to kill celebrities ways that amuse me.
"Guy Fieri died today in a bizarre cooking related incident, when he broke onto the set of Hell's Kitchen during a live recording session. He launched into a loud and nonsensical rant, dropped his pants without warning, and jammed his penis into food shouting 'I'm Guy Fieri! I'm hardcore! Gonna cook until I DIIEEEEE!' Before security could apprehend Fieri, Gordon Ramsey beat him into a delicious human pate..."
>>161929744
Have it kill my fat cells
>>161934421
Imagine being so fat that you've given names to your fat cells.
>>161933655
So you mean heart attacks, because you fucked up.
>>161934586
Correct me if I'm wrong (it's been a long time since I watched Death Note), but couldn't he influence Ramsay's actions as well so long as he wrote his name as a separate entry in the Death Note?
>>161931911
>>161931784
It's easy.
Write down "Donald J. Trump launches entire nuclear arsenal of the united states at every other nation that has a nuclear arsenal but targets them in such a away that the arsenals remain intact."
Humanity dies in a few minutes.
>>161934680
Read the rules Anon.
>Even though only one name is written in the Death Note, if it influences and causes other humans that are not written in it to die, the victim's cause of death will be a heart attack.
>>161934669
Yes, but wasn't there a rule about basically not breaking character? Can't make someone do something they would "never" do.
>>161934727
This anon is right. This is how you get pass that shit tier rule.
>Donald Trump comes visit in his house and brings the nuclear briefcase with him
>Donald Trump gives the names of every Secret Service agents assigned to him
>Donald Trump tells me how to use the briefcase
>write down the names of all the SS
>Donald Trump dies peacefully in his sleep a minute after I write down the SS names
>proceed to use the nuclear briefcase
There done.I hope the Shinigami King likes them apples ;)
Have one or two rich folks give me their money before they publicly commit suicide.
>>161929744
>get shinigami eyes
>walk through college campus writing down every name I see
>people will be screaming and going wild, not knowing it was caused by a magic note book
that or just kill every world leader and watch the world burn
Probably free my country(Venezuela) from the commies.
Kill every criminal in the world.
>>161929744
Kill George Soros. He's an old fuck anyway nobody would suspect a thing
>>161929744
kill the richest people in the world just to see what would happen
>>161934680
>Trump has the power to launch nukes whenever the fuck he wants and at whoever the fuck he wants
You are beyond retarded.
>>161939999
great idea. great digits
Give it to Alex Jones.
>>161929744
Write my own name. Death by snusnu
>>161940465
Death Note can only do so much, anon. For deaths that aren't possible they die by heart attack.
Clean up /b/ and /soc/ out of normalfags, maybe even leddit too
Since finding a real Death Note will literally prove there is no Heaven nor Hell, and that dying will yield no moral based consequences for me:
>Use deaths of key people to shape the world markets to benefit my own company
>Use deaths to eliminate political opponents and use my influence to install people loyal to me
>Take out major crime syndicates to literally clean my spheres of influences around the world, and ignore those outside of it.
>Eventually united my spheres of influences to redraw borders and form new nations that align with my social, political and economic values.
>Conquer the world through my proxies further spreading my ideas of what is true human morality
>World peace according to my design
Hopefully before my death, humanity would have this sociality so ingrained they know that ideas from Marxism and Americanism are flawed and failed systems that they will never go back. None the less I'll be sure to have a successor for the Death Note when I'm finally gone.
Wizards of The Coast Writing Staff
>>161941533
>prove there is no Heaven nor Hell
Did you watch the fucking show? Heaven and hell are practically canon when it's so specifically stated that death note users will go to neither. Same result for you in the end, but what you said is still wrong.
>>161931551
>hehehe Im so smart I'll kill a bunch of Japanese people but only in my spare time as a student
Bravo Light, bravo
>>161941622
It's confirmed by the writer Tsugumi Ohba that there is no heaven and hell, and even no afterlife for humans when they die. Humans just go to Mu (nothingness) becoming non-existent
>>161931551
>>161941639
Let's not forget killing Lind L.Taylor
>>161930174
At least he ain't a cop killer.
>>161929744
Help Japan with its low birth rate problem by making otakus act out hentai plots all over japan.
>>161929744
Tell the shinigami to fuck off, I'm a Christian man.
>>161941712
I don't usually defend afterlife bullshit, but, that's stupid on account of the rule that death note users go to Mu being completely pointless and misleading.
>>161929845
Probably this, but I'm going out with a bunch of people too, I might consider the possibility of putting the Death Notes pages in a printer and feed it a whole database of people.
>>161929744
I give it back to the shinigami. What kind of person would use a death note?
>>161929744
Move to Mexico and become the richest cartel boss that's ever existed.
>I can kill any opposition.
>I can order my rivals to give me their domains before dying.
What if Lelouch had a Death Note?
>>161941833
*tips*
>>161941858
>Printing names
while that sound utterly awesome and really efficient, you can't. You have to visualized the persons face when you wright the names down.
>>161941934
He'd save the people that didn't have to die.
>>161929744
Anonymously sell pages
Sellers are led by the book before they die
of course pages are hidden and far away from me before starting the business
>>161942035
Aw chucks you are right, completely forgot about that, fuck it I guess, no way I'm writing a shitload of names to go out in an spectacular way, I'm too lazy so I'd just kill myself right away.
I would probably do what Light did but like once or twice a year at random
>>161941622
>Did you watch the fucking show?
Did you? Every fucking thread there's someone who completely missed the flashback where Ryuk reveals the whole thing was just a giant red herring and compliments Light for figuring it out.
>>161929744
>Create a website in the dark Web
>With just a textbox and a label "Enter a name to kill"
>When the user confirm the name, a printer print the name on a Death Note's page
>>161941742
Killing Raye Penber was worse
>>161942920
Kinda like a black mirror ep where everyone got massacred by robot bees
>>161943109
Technically the one entering the name is the one causing it to be written and they would also be thinking about the face while doing it, so it might work as long as the note is lenient enough about what is considered "writing".
>Kill a whole bunch of people, innocent or otherwise. Just mass killing to get peoples attention
>Once I'm a known entity, I'll kill somone important and have them leave a note
>The note instucts them to follow my orders, orders will be given out weekly via a note written by someone of their choosing (Who will then die)
>Orders will contain policy chances that must be enacted before the next week
>Failure will result in world leaders death
>Basically I'd blackmail world leaders into fixing our horrible countryI'd also wipe out the middle east
>>161943239
Good luck properly writing down their goat speak
>>161941833
>that's stupid on account of the rule that death note users go to Mu being completely pointless and misleading.
It's supposed to be misleading. The point of that rule is to influence the user into a false moral quandary. Remember, the whole humans getting a death note is a game for the shinigami.
>We'll never get another Death Note that focuses on the notes owner using the note to influence global politics to create a utopia
Killing all the baddies was a pretty dull and short sighted goal for a 'genius', then again I guess it fit with Lights ego complex.
>>161942920
>>161943109
>Create a website in the dark Web
>Users can send the name of person who they want to kill and a picture of his face.
>When the user confirm (and paid 5 bitcoins) write the name for him.
>>161943239
>>Basically I'd blackmail world leaders into fixing our horrible country
Protip: if they could fix it they would have. The vast majority of politicians, even most of the corrupt, self serving shitheads, want to better their country. Most political conflicts are about how to do it.
Protip 2: You don't know how to do it either.
>>161943587
>It's supposed to be misleading
This. It's fucking frustrating how some idiots miss it even though it's literally explicitly said that Ryuk was trying to mislead Light. He fucking says it HIMSELF. The discussion is pretty much
>don't think you can go to heaven or hell if you use the note
>pfft yeah right, you're trying to trick me man, I bet that just means there are no heaven or hell in the first place
>whoa you're good, also good job not losing your shit
>>161929744
Nothing really, at least once I knew what it could do. There's no one in existence I hate badly enough that I'd want them dead.
>>161943733
>The vast majority of politicians, even most of the corrupt, self serving shitheads, want to better their country
lmao
>>161933155
Underrated post
>>161929744
Give it to Trump. He'll use it better than me
>>161940768
underrated
>>161942035
What if they think about their face while typing.
Would be more applicable here >>161942920
>>161943903
It's true though. Only the absolute worst of the worst are only out for themselves and would burn their nation if it benefited them.
>>161944192
>Kim Jong wants the best for his country
>Thats why he doesn't feed his people, denies them basic human rights and instead ships off to death camps
>>161944192
>Only the absolute worst of the worst
That's what most of them are, bud. The whole reason cities are shit and full of crime is because people won't change the economic system so we don't have to rely on wave after wave of migrants at the price of the host country. For it to keep going, there has to be population growth forever.
>>161944245
>Only the absolute worst of the worst
>Kim Jon Un
Your point?
>>161944299
Change the economic system how?
>>161944350
Kick out all the Jews.
>inb4 ban
Find OP's name
Write it on the note, with cause of death being a broken spine during auto fellatio, found a few hours later in that state by close relatives.
>>161943587
>>161943737
Only for one particular shinigami. since every other death god is too lazy.
You know Ryuk would get into a shitload of trouble if he didn't manage to get enough apples to bribe his boss, the King of Hell.
If Ryuk didn't have those apples to bribe with, I bet the King of Hell would have retconned everything that happened.
Kill criminals, have them write out in their blood "anime was a mistake". I only stop killing when anime stops.
>>161944397
>jew encourage their children to study hard and work hard to get ahead
>disproportionately represented in politics, science, and finance as a result
>maybe I should encourage my children to study and work hard? Nah that's too much trouble, let's just kill em or deport em!
This is why murrica got the bomb before Germany.
>>161944410
That would only work if Op was flexible enough, and I dont think you can control when people find him
>>161944485
There is no "King of Hell", there's a Shinigami King.
>>161944545
>disproportionately represented in politics, science, and finance as a result
You also forgot
>use positions of power to hurt country
Kicking out Jews and wanting your kids to study isn't mutually exclusive, anon.
The only people that don't want to work are Leftists, Blacks, Abos, and Mexicans.
I don't even blame the Mexicans for doing it. Why work when you can get free shit?
I would have no problems with Jews if they weren't cartoonishly evil.
Believe it or not, some aren't.
Wait for the election of my country and kill the elected president, making him state that this will keep happening until a candidate gets 80% of the votes or more.
Also I would kill all the congress and senate. I will just wipe the state.
>>161944518
Only right answer so far.
Is it possible to run out of space in the death note? Shouldn't Light have filled up the entire thing eventually with all the names he was writing down?
>>161944788
>Is it possible to run out of space in the death note?
No.
>how?
Pic.
>>161944788
Doesn't Ryuk state in episode 1 that he has to stay until either Lights dead or he runs out of pages?
>>161944896
Well it can't be the latter because that won't happen.
>>161929744
I'm going to specify that my death is going to come just after the moment of climax from fucking all my favorite 2d females
>>161944930
Clearly, probably just an oversight on the creators end
>>161944948
>impossible, sorry, enjoy your HNNNGGH
>>161944961
It's explicitly said that it will never run out of pages.
It doesn't matter what I do, I'd get caught by the hacker 4chan eventually
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8OfANX2hEw&t=2s
>>161929744
Why couldn't penbar scream when Light was behind him that the was Kira. He knows they need a name and face and Light couldn't possibly have everybody's name in the crowd, so if penbar did that Light would be fucked.
>>161944397
>kick out the Jews
>country goes to shit
every single time
>>161945243
Other way around.
>>161945243
>kick out Jews
>have the greatest economic and cultural recovery ever seen
Countries only go to shit when Jews in other countries gang up on the first country.
>>161944708
>making him state that this will keep happening until a candidate gets 80% of the votes or more.
The only candidates to get 80% of the vote are dictators "running" for "reelection" who think by not having 100% of the vote people won't realize the elections are fixed.
>>161944702
>Kicking out Jews and wanting your kids to study isn't mutually exclusive, anon.
No, but it never seems to work with both of them combined. Most anti-semitism in the US at least comes from the far right who hate education and think college is a liberal plot to make their children gay, or "pro-Palestine" liberal arts students on the left who have their parents pay for their college so they major in underwater basket weaving and never actually learn anything and will say shit like they're not anti semetic because palestinians are semetic people and they only hate the evil israeli oppressors. While their reasons for it might be different, neither group studies anything but alternative facts.
Imagine the chaos when random world leaders start dying in accidents or by heart attacks.
It will seem like a huge coincidence at first, but after several die, it will be obvious something is up.
There will be chaos, panic, the perfect happening.
>>161944989
Where?
>>161945553
>the far right who hate education and think college is a liberal plot
You are correct about conservatives disliking the current college situation, but people on the right like education as a whole. The H man himself recognized the importance of education, as do all Facsists, Nazis, Monarchists, and other right wing authoritarians (right wing authoritarians hate leftwing authoritarians, pic related). We just don't like how it's currently handled with Common Core at K-12 and mainly Marxist and Jewish professors at colleges. I would support college if it weren't so Leftist leaning for no reason, where shit like BLM and Antifa is free to attack people with different views. I'm intolerant because these people refuse to listen to reason.
>>161945824
>right wing authoritarians hate rightwing Libertarians, pic related
fixed, fuck I need to sleep
>>161945762
I don't remember the exact chapter, but I reread the entire thing this year and it's made clear.
>>161945762
>>161946043
Apparently it's in the How to Use: XXXI rule.
Open up a phone book and kill anyone with a pretentious first name that starts with x,y, or z
>>161946121
Anon it's not their fault their parents gave them a shitty name. Find their parents and kill them.
Mass heart-attacks. Not for justice or any of that gay shit but just to freak everyone the fuck out.
>>161944350
Economists have solved poverty since the 1980s (negative income tax). They've even tested it out on various cities across the US with conclusive results, but no politician on either side in the US is going to risk their career ever suggesting it.
Become an "assassin".
Imagine the dosh you could make by being able to provide assassinations that are untraceable and look perfectly like accidents.
You'd have to get it out and do some "work" maybe once a year and the rest of the time can be wasted on stupid shit you enjoy.
nothing
I don't remember the rules of it exactly, but I think if you use it your life gets shortened or some shit, and I'd do whatever I could to keep it from ever being used AND to an extent where it wouldn't harm me either.
>>161929744
write my own name in it so if someone finds it they know it's mine
>>161948082
>I think if you use it your life gets shortened or some shit
No, that's just if you get the shinigami eyes.
It states that you cannot go to heaven or hell after using it IIRC, but that universe has neither so it doesn't actually matter.
>>161929744
Encase it in block of concrete with steel shell and drop it in ocean with at least 2km depth.
>>161929744
Hold world leaders hostage and become new world leader
>>161934680
You would have to do things like kill diplomats while they are in china and use the suspicion to rile up America. Something like Ivanka had a heart attack on a trip to russia.
I would just kill CEOs to short stock.
>>161931890
/thread, honestly
Anything besides productive humanitarian purposes would be dangerously close to making you power-trippy.
I would never use it obviously
Light literally wanted the world to know someone is taking care of criminals
I'd do it in a way that no one would know and for my own personal gain. I mean, if some autists from pol managed to find a single flag in the whole wide world by looking at the stars, what makes me think I can get away with a death note?
>>161931890
don't they have to die within a month?
>>161932921
I misread that and imagined Obama jotting names down in a Death Note.
>>161929845
This or wipe cum
>>161929744
Kill (((them))) all.
>>161929845
came to post
>>161945298
>>161945243
>Whites and every country want to enslaved and oppressed the poor
you don't say evil as fuck Now I support the jews
>>161929744
Get a Kolondike bar.
>>161948422
who is them?
>>161934680
You have no idea how nuclear weapons work. Good job.
>>161929845
Came here to check if this was the first post
fpbp
>>161948082
There's no rule that says that using the note directly shortens your own life. Your lifespan may be indirectly altered by the course of your own actions while using the note, i.e. you get caught and executed. There's also a rule that says you're allowed to write your own name in the note which will sure as hell shorten it if that's what you're looking for.
>>161948210
23 days. If you write anything beyond that they die of a heart attack in 40 seconds. Almost any time an Anon tries to do something "clever" in one of these threads it ends with a heart attack in 40 seconds.
>>161929744
Kill Abe Shinzou and Kubo
>>161929744
CLEANSE THIS WORLD! of course. Duh.
>>161937581
Ah. You fucked up there. too.
execution list
1. Makoto (School days)
2. Protagonist (Rezero, forgot his name)
3. KimpigNK
>>161950871
You write the names in the book and then realise how big of an idiot you are for writing the name of fictional characters.
>>161944788
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUtsg8AlNxY
I would start with killing off every Jew in any position of power. Then corporate lobbyists next.
Third death wave probably goes to televised preachers, fourth to select politicos who are clearly interested in fucking everyone else over.
That covers the obligatory deaths. Also all of them die by autoerotic asphyxiation.
>>161950926
You will realize who the real idiot is when I write you're waifu's name in the Death Note.
>>161951008
My waifu can't die.
>>161948056
Money isn't untraceable, though.
Kill everyone who is anti-pedo.
So what happens if you run out pages, Do you just hang out with the Shinigami until you die?
>>161951377
It never runs out of pages