What's the way into his heart? How do I seduce him?

>>152996696
Beat the shit out of him.

>>152996696
>heart

>>152996696
Become an angry blonde bartender

>2017
>drrr
Hello thirdie.

>>152996799
>FOTM anime watcher
Cancer

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>>152996799
But it's a classic, anon. And it only ended last year.

You are already in his heart because you're a ningen

>>152996798
Will it ever become canon?
Will Izaya ever come back to Ikebukuro?

>>152996696
You need to take a knife to your stomach for him. Like a certain deranged doctor who is in love with a tsundere monster.

>>152996847

It can't be the way it used to, with Izaya mocking him and running away etc. Izaya got so wrekt in his fight against Shizuo that he needs a wheelchair now. Still impresse because everyone else would have died.

>>152996696
You know he's like this because he tries to compensate for his tiny dick, right?

>>152996894
I've read that he was still afraid of Shizuo in that novel about Izaya after he left Ikebukuro. Can't remember the name, something something sunset.

He sees a girl in a normal bartender uniform and has war flashbacks. I laughed at first but then felt a bit sad for him.

>>152996960
Tiny dicks are cute

>>152996960
>>>/facebook/

>>152996960
I can relate.

>>152996696
He isn't real

>>152997001

Yeah he feels like shit for losing against him, he could probably learn to walk again but accepts his state as a punishment.
At first I didn't get the impression that this was such a serious issue for Izaya but Shizuo really didn't fit into his worldview at all and being unable to remove him pretty much broke him

>>152997001
>>152997117
I love Izaya suffering.

>>152997136
God, me too. I've never enjoyed someone's pain this much.

>>152997096
Not an argument.
>>152997117
That's why he needs my love.

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>>152997117
It was literally a draw. Shizuo would have won without Vorona's help but not without Celty's help, he would have exploded. If this was a pure 1v1 all the way through, Izaya would have had a high chance of winning.
It's not fair.

>>152997321
Absolutely not. He was going to die before Vorona got involved. He was going to die after that too but Celty kept him alive in that car. If she didn't, he was gonna bleed to death. He is just a normal person, no match to Shizuo. That's what's ruining him.

>>152997573
Yeah but do you think Shizuo could have survived that explosion? At the least he would have been heavily injured and made to look like Anakin Skywalker post ep3. Celty interfering ruined their 1v1

>>152997657
He would be injured but wouldn't die and he heals quickly. But izaya was going to die. People got involved twice and he was saved by those.

But yes, their 1v1 was ruined. I wanted to see what they could really do to each other.

>>152997321
Since Celty saw the need to step in in the first place, it may not have ended well for Shizuo but he would probably have survived. He can tank an excavator with his collar bone.

>>152997022
Tiny dicks are for laughing at
>>152997071
Though I'm sorry for you, anon

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>>152996696
Attempt to be interesting.

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>>152998251
Mikado's completely normal though.

>>152998357
He stabbed a guy's hand with a pen for dissing his crush. How is that normal anon?

>>152998448
He just got carried away. Besides, the little fuck was trying to betray him. He had to make a show of force.

>>152996696
Izaya cured my depression and aids
He shows that even if you are too autistic to make bonds with people you can still have fun with them

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>>152998448
Sometimes you need to send a message to make sure they get the memo.

>His dad doesn't even call him by his name
Lovely

>>152998448
He's just defending senpai

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>>152997117
He's still an ass though, I vaguely remember how he made someone kill his boss because he was going to fire him and then he called the killer to tell him that the boss was only about to fire him because he wanted to protect him because the company was involved in illegal things and it was about to be made public. Something like that.

>>153003361
>Crossed legs
So he can still move them?

>>153003564
The way I understood it was that he took some permanent damage from the fight but he isn't paralyzed. Walking either hurts like a motherfucker or just doesn't work right.