HOW TO BE AN ANIME PATRICIAN IN SIX EASY STEPS:
1. The kinds of things that most people proclaim to care about in anime are character and story. The first step is realizing that these things don't matter, because anime is a visual medium. Of course, it's also an aural medium, but that's not a line that patricians repeat ad nauseum, so you don't have to worry about it. Why are character and story irrelevant even if anime is conveyed through images, you might ask? Who cares! Just keep repeating to yourself that anime is a visual medium until you get it.
2. Namedrop animators and the word 'sakuga' many times. Post links to webms from sakugabooru with superficial one-liner commentaries on those specific scenes.
3. Namedrop experimental shorts no one has ever watched. Cite them as anime of the year on a daily basis no matter where or when you're posting.
4. Complain about the decadent state of TV anime, make sure to include the fact that it is an inherently inferior format to film and that only 1-2 decent series at best come out a year. Cite Kyoani as the best studio currently working today. Of course you really mean it has the best directors currently because judging a work by studios is so far below your intelligence. Just the frequent usage of 'Godhouse' revolts you.
5. Make fun of people who don't know as much as you do. Include commentary on their ignorance. Make statements on the terrible posting patterns and ideological beliefs of certain sites e.g MAL, Neogaf, /a/. Pat yourself on the back for your brilliant observations skills.
6. Engage in what is known as "hot-takes". Pride yourself in your unpopular opinions, bathe in the tears of the dirty plebeians. Try to make as much controversial statements as you possibly can, make daring critiques on specific directors and studios on a constant basis.
You fucked up
13. kill yourself 2nd time to be sure
14. get real dubs
How to be a patrician:
1. Like Hack Sign
2. Like Nichijou
3. Like Casshern Sins
4. Like FLCL
5. Like Hyouka
6. Like HxH 1999
7. Like Ping Pong
8. Like Shinsekai Yori
9. Like The Sky Crawlers
There, you're a patrician.
13 or whatever: Make one of those absurd res images with a bunch of shitty shows against a black background. Title it "Essential Anime" and include a prelude that goes something like "If you want to break into anime, these are the shows that you HAVE to have seen." First row is dedicated entirely to Cowboy Bebop, NGE and the like. Monster comes in somewhere.
Compared to the first two Monster is garbage.
Shitpost on /m/ with obscure 80s manga and claim to be a master weeb
Aside from the fact that Kyoani really is the best studio, and that making fun of people for being ignorant and terrible posters is perfectly acceptable, this is a pretty good list. But please try to reflect on the fact that all the support for you in this thread is in the form of "+1" youtube comment style "posts", and then also kill yourself for making a shitty meta thread.