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Your waifu has an arc in the Monogatari series. How does it go?

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Your waifu has an arc in the Monogatari series. How does it go?
how come shinnybobo's donut hangs like it's a bag with weight in it?
What if she is already in it?
She has multiple arcs in the Monogatari series. It went well.
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She would steal all the girls from that manlet
>Gorilla Tsumugi
Rumors are that light music club student Kotobuki Tsumugi is being accused of dating foreingers of african descendants. While this might not be truth, a stalker gorilla is pursuing her in the shadows. As Araragi comes into the story to help her, they figure out the gorilla represents the all the weight of the rumors. It is until Tsumugi confesses in public her secret about being actually into girls when the gorilla dissapears.
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It was pretty good.
maybe it is a fresh donut
I see you have never had a fresh donut.

Shortly after separating them from their mothers womb, it is customary to sever the umbilical cords of the embryos while she is still alive.

This allows the innards to congeal and ferment within minutes, giving a much tastier, if less firm, donut. You typically do not see this in factory-farmed donuts, where the mother donuts are electrocuted in an assembly line.

Japan and South Korea are the only countries where you can still commonly buy jelly donuts fresh from the cave, due to Western squeamishness. You also do not see the congealed jelly in live Israeli or Turkish donuts, as the jelly is considered haram/not kosher.
9/10 should be adapted.

Why isn't this thread booming? Not many storyfags around?
>Cactus Yuuka

I can only see a harem made out of the original girls and Araragi.
Finally an expert on the matter.
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she cuts her hair
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Another Kanbaru arc?
Hope there is no ghost lesbian in it this time and more of the old cast.
I could write 100 pages about it if I really wanted, but nobody would care enough to read it.
Araragi molests Enma Ai
I care, anon.
She dies trying to tilt her neck too much.
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He continuously tries to figure out what's wrong with her, that she's posessed, until he realizes that she simply lives by the credo of "Fuck Bitches, Get Money."

Arc ends with one last Dragon Slave to his ass for good measure.
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She kills it.
Cutting through the stillness of the night, an ancient bell tolled. Dong... Dong... Dong... Twelve times. Midnight. The number 00:00 displayed prominently in the lower right corner of the monitor. One last refresh of the webpage that had since displayed a 404 error, and the screen turned black. A single fireball illuminated the angered face of the child. The snakes in the hair had since faded away. All that remained was the wrath.
On the monitor, the fireball had since been replaced with a text box, above which were the words あなたの怨み、晴らします。(Your resentment, I will relieve or similar). The cursor blinked impatiently, waiting for an input. The child did not have to be asked twice. The furious clacking of keys could be heard as a name was typed: 戦場ヶ原ひたぎ. Senjougahara Hitagi. Sengoku Nadeko had come to hate Hitagi, and on her behalf Jigoku Shoujo would send her to Hell.

Should I continue?
I have some bad news for you, anon.

Unless you're a lesbian femanon, in which case, carry on.
Rin would exorcise the oddity herself.
Why do I sound like a translation of Nasu? Am I just wasting my time with this?
Stop being so fucking insecure anon and continue with the story.
>implying her being a lesbian is any more of a hindrance than her being 2D.

A waifu is a state of mind anon.
If you say so.

Click. The message had been sent. Hell Girl had been summoned. Nadeko leaned back in her chair, questioning what she had just done. She had heard a rumor. Some student had transferred to the high school after being run out of town for being framed for murder. The true culprit, the supposed right arm that would save japanese baseball, had disappeared. This wasn't the first rumor that had been spread among Nadeko's peers, a girl from Hell taking revenge on your behalf, but this one had a sort of ring to it. An ominous feeling. However there was no change in the air after she clicked send. Rumors aren't to be trusted anyways. She hung her head as she got up out of the computer chair.
That's not how carpet wasn't supposed to feel. Nadeko looked up to find herself in some supernatural environment. The grass was black like ash. The sun hung low in the sky, alight with the fires of twilight. Before her was the silhouette of an old sakura tree, and under it, looking right at Nadeko, was a black-haired japanese schoolgirl. Her voice rang out in the dusk.
“You summoned me?”
The girl stared at her with blazing red eyes that felt a lot older than she was. Her face carried an indifferent but grave expression, she had experienced this situation many times before and did not enjoy it at all. She spoke again:
“My name is Enma Ai”.
This was her.
Jigoku Shoujo.
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She's already got a couple. They went great.
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Would Ika be a oddity? would the "darkness" come after her because she is not invading humanity as she was supposed to be?
Jigoku Shoujo called for the old man standing behind her.
“Yes, miss.”
He pulled out a red scarf and threw it around himself. At that moment, he fell on the ground, a black straw doll. Jigoku Shoujo picked up the doll, and walked up to Nadeko.
“Take this”
Her hand extended out to Nadeko, offering her the doll that was one minute ago a person. Nadeko had no choice but to oblige. It was an ordinary straw doll, like the ones used in curses. Tied to it was a read thread.
Jigoku Shoujo started speaking again.
“If you truly wish revenge, untie the red thread. If you do so, you will enter a contract with me. The object of your resentment will swiftly be sent to Hell.”
The way the girl talked was old-fashioned, but her words were clear. If she untied the thread, Senjougahara Hitagi would be sent to Hell. Nadeko's hand moved toward the thread.
Nadeko's hand leapt back.
“If you take your revenge, you too shall pay the price.”
Nadeko looked at Jigoku Shoujo.
“Like chickens, curses come to roost. When you die, your soul will also go to Hell. You will never see Heaven. Your soul will be subjected to an eternity of agony.”
Suddenly Nadeko found herself in a sea of blue flame. Souls of the damned rose up from it. Their moans of anguish pervaded through Nadeko's very being as they reached out and grabbed her. Cold flesh digged into her core and pinned her in place. She could not imagine what would happen next.
Nothing. Nadeko found her in her room. It was exactly as she left it. The clock read a few minutes past midnight and her computer screen displayed the 404 page that she stared at for the last half hour. Maybe it was all a dream? Before she could entertain that possibility her foot brushed against the straw doll that the girl had given her. Jigoku Shoujo's voice echoed through the room.
“What comes next, you will have to decide,”

This whole sequence in the series takes like 5 minutes.
OVA 3 never

Morning had arrived. Nadeko had woken up with a straw doll in her hand. She suddenly remembered who had given it to her. She had really done it. She had summoned Jigoku Shoujo. She had stayed up the other night in order to find truth in yet another rumor spread throughout her school. It was a struggle even going after being deceived by the conman Kaiki out of being a snake deity. Even though she had sworn to kill him and his girlfriend with the power that she stole from him, her friend Araragi Koyomi was still happy to help her. Her friend, Araragi Koyomi. Those words still hurt. All those years of unrequited love had driven her into almost murdering the object of her affection, and after all that the man was still happy to be her friend. This feeling must be what virgin males refer to when they describe 'the friendzone'. Nevertheless, Nadeko pulled herself into her school uniform and worked up a sprint out of the door, toast in mouth. What good is it going to do to be upset first thing in the morning?
As she made her to school, she was joined in her run by a close acquaintance of hers and Koyomi's. Kanbaru Suruga. Her once long and beautiful hair kept in braids was now cropped off to the point that it looked as if it were shaven. Nadeko was taken aback by the appearance, but was reassured when the face beaming at her told that it kind of suited her.
“How have you been hanging, Nadeko-chan? The Araragilessness not getting you down too bad, is it?”
After the whole snake god thing it seems that everybody had become privy to her long-guarded feelings for Koyomi-onii-chan. Nadeko looked down, hiding her shame under her bangs.
“We can't do that anymore, remember?”
Alas, Nadeko's bangs had been cut off long ago, but hadn't been given a chance to grow back since her hair had been turned into serpents. Kanbaru could clearly see the look on Nadeko's face, and it worried her.
“What's wrong?”
“You can tell me, come on”
She couldn't tell Kanbaru, about last night. If Kanbaru knew that Nadeko planned to send her love Senjougahara Hitagi to Hell, consequences would never be the same.

“If you can't tell me, maybe you could tell Araragi-kun when he comes around. I have to head this way to the high school. See you!”

Nadeko started running in the same direction as Kanbaru, towards the high school. Koyomi had since graduated and there was no chance of finding him or Hitagi there, but it would still make her late for school. No matter. That wasn't who Nadeko wanted to ask about.

“That transfer student.”
“Who? The baseball one?”
“Yes, him”
“He's a real slugger, that one. He was inspired by his friend who died to be the best damn ball player out there. I could set you up with him if you want.”
“No, thanks anyways. Could I ask you a little about him though?”
“Sure, what do you want to know?”
“Before he moved here, he was apparently run out of town?”
“Yeah, his friend was apparently murdered with a baseball bat by some hot shot player, and he almost got framed for it. I'm sure your school has heard about this story by now.”
“I heard. He sent the hotshot to Hell by summoning Jigoku Shoujo?”
“Kids are sharp these days. Araragi-kun has been looking up on that Jigoku Shoujo. You should talk to him about that business. By the way, you're a half mile out of your way.”
“Oh shoot! See you then”

Nadeko stumbled in the direction of her own school. She passed an alleyway and saw a clock up ahead displaying the time. It was past when she should have been at the building. It didn't matter how late she arrived now that she does. She started to slow her pace.
If she had slowed her pace before now she would have seen in the alleyway a pair of fiery red eyes glaring at her. Jigoku Shoujo.

Nobody is still reading this, are they?
she has multiple arcs but I'm never going to see the backstory to any of them since it won't be released until 30XX
Go write it down and upload it somewhere
I am writing it down and am copying it here by paragraph since some guy said so. Where would I upload it?
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Fite me fgt. Rouka x Suruga best OTP. And Rouka is my waifu
I am.
It's alright anon. I too occasionally enjoy the flavor of shit, but surely you realize it's not healthy for you?
Stop projecting, faggot.
Well here's another paragraph.

Araragi Koyomi had graduated high school not long ago, and had since seemed to pick up the work of his mentor Oshino Meme. He had heard rumors of a transfer student having been ran out of town for the murder of his best friend, not before the true culprit had disappeared. The cause of this disappearance seemed to be the one called Jigoku Shoujo. Apparently a schoolgirl who is a lot older than she looks, sending people to Hell in exchange for their mortal souls. He's heard stranger rumors out of the schools of this town, but this one felt much more real. A book had been written about the phenomenon by Shibata Hajime, a crooked freelance journalist who had since himself vanished off the face of the earth. The poor fool had paid for the cost of publishing this book all by himself. This Jigoku Shoujo must really be important to him. Araragi himself would much like to meet the girl.
Just as he said that, he came across a young woman standing in the alleyway. About 149cm tall, pristine japanese hair in a hime cut, wearing a black school uniform. Her face was turned away from him, as if she was observing someone. Whoever it was had since passed and she started to turn back. It was too late. Araragi was overcome by his urge and leaped towards the girl. She let out a soft gasp as Araragi started groping every inch of her. The smooth skin on her slender limbs was particularly cold to what he was used to, but that delicious flat chest was all he could have hoped for. The girl remained silent as he started moving his hands closer and closer to the place that should not be named-
Suddenly Araragi's pedophilic rampage ground to a halt.
“It's no fun if you're not going to react at all”
The girl remained silent.
“What's your name?”
“Enma Ai”
“Ah, Jigoku Shoujo?”
Ai looked at Araragi, her scarlet eyes, wide with bewilderment, confirming his suspicion.
“I've been wanting to meet you for a while now.”
“Now that I have, I don't know what to say. This Is odd, normally I have something.”
“You're the Jigoku Shoujo, the one who takes revenge on other's behalf?”
“What are you doing here?”
“My job.”
“Do you know what happened to Shibata Hajime?”
“Who knows?”
“Welp. Do you want to go out on a date?”
“You must be hungry. Let me buy you something to eat. It's the least I can do.”

Even throughout being asked out by the man who not two minutes ago molested her, Ai's face did not change. Her face carried the same apathetic expression to which she had grown accustomed. Not getting much input from the girl, Araragi was at a loss. This girl probably never had been out on a date even before she was the illustrious Jigoku Shoujo.

“My offer still stands. If you want to go somewhere, just let me know.”
“Still no reply?”
“I have work to do. Good day.”

Something caught Araragi's attention. A bird flapping its wings, the buzzing of a bee, the walk of a crab; whatever it was, it had completely averted his gaze at Ai. When he looked back, she was gone. Vanished without a trace. As expected from the Girl from Hell.
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Courage can make anything sound good, a lesson by Akemi Homura.

The courage to fall in love.
The courage to betray a friend.
The courage to abandon your comrades.
The courage to do everything right
Welp, I'm out of steam. Chapter 2 coming soon I guess.
Ah, thanks. This is actually interesting.
It would be meh
more please.

I can't remember how Araragi and Kanbaru talked to each other at all.

The ambiance of the night was broken by a buzzing noise. A cell phone. Kanbaru had to do some digging through a pile of BL books and dragon dildos in order to find it. She opened it up to find a message from Araragi.
“Guess who I met today?”
She replied in her usual manner.
“Karen and Tsukihi's boyfriends?”
“No, silly. Jigoku Shoujo.”
This startled her. How could he talk about a girl with such a reputation in such a light-hearted tone? He could be egging her on. Best to play along.
“Oh really? How was she?”
“Very quiet. Probably a virgin.”
“Not for long, knowing you”
Kanbaru couldn't help but giggle at the fellow.
The conversation reminded her of the chat she had with Sengoku Nadeko that morning.
“Have you heard from Nadeko today?”
“No, why?”
“She was asking me things.”
“What kind of things?”
“About that transfer student who apparently got run run out of town”
“You set the pair of them up yet?”
“She wouldn't buy it. The poor thing still loves you.”
“You're gay, why don't you try fixing her? If so, can I watch?”
“She was asking about Jigoku Shoujo.”

Those words changed the air in the room. The cold night air gripped Kanbaru's skin like the bite of infinite vampires. Maybe she could try not being naked. The seconds since Araragi's last reply were becoming minutes. Araragi must be thoroughly thinking through this.
Suddenly a new message.
“We need to talk to Nadeko.”
I want full power kisshot molesting shota araragi
That's another story.
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