Hey, /x/, I'd like to have a conversation (and ask a few questions) about something that's been going on with me lately. Let me preface by saying that I'm not particularly attuned to supernatural things, apart from feeling the energy of a room and that kind of thing (which I tend to chalk up to instinct/intuition anyway.)
I will go into detail starting with my first post. I don't have this prepared at all, so any precautionary bumps are appreciated in case I take forever to organize my thoughts. I don't have any creepy stuff saved, so my posts will be accompanied with EMT humor like the one in the OP, unless you guys tell me you really don't like it.
It's hard to say exactly when this all started, on the surface it kind of seems like a string of really bad luck, but it feels more than that if only because it's been happening for so long.
I'll put the ballpark at about 2 months ago this began, starting with simple things like me seeming clumsier than usual. Stuff falling off the shelves when I walk close by, close enough that I think "My jacket must've snagged" but I'm fairly sure it didn't, things of this nature.
I noticed my ambulances having lots of issues. We never get the same ambulance 2 days in a row at my company, there are about 50 total and they each have their quirks, but I started having critical failures with the trucks and equipment practically every shift, to the point that I got written up because my supervisors thought I was either tampering or making stuff up to waste time.
Posting now to avoid pruning, will start getting into the good stuff with the next post
Forgot 4chan no longer allows selfbump, it's been a while. Anyway, moving on.
When I say critical failure this is what I mean. As far as the trucks go, engine shut-downs out of nowhere, the lights and/or sirens getting stuck on/off, one tire blowout on a highway that would've resulted in a nasty crash if it weren't for my kickass EMT.
As far as the equipment goes, the Lifepak (cardiac monitor/defibrillator) either not showing any heart rhythm, or showing rhythms that are completely wrong. Twice in the last month a printout has saved my job because my treatment was correct for what my monitor showed, but completely wrong for what was actually happening in the patient. Two weeks ago I was working a code (cardiac arrest with chest compressions, etc in progress) and the lock on my drug box broke, we had to transport 15 minutes the hospital without giving any ACLS drugs which might've saved that person's life.
These are all things that you hear about happening, are totally within the realm of possibility, but happening to the same person in such a short span of time seems far too much.
Getting to the spooky stuff next. And feel free to ask any questions, as I said this is being done on the fly I'm sure I will miss some parts of the story and/or explain things oddly
Apart from being clumsy and having equipment failures, the main thing that has been going awry is the sheer volume of fucked up calls that I've been running lately. In my system, we have several nursing homes, plenty of schools, lots of large highways, shitty parts of town with a large homeless population and plenty of gang violence to go around. That being said, I've been working in this town for going on 4 years, and I've worked as many codes, shootings, stabbings, rapes, and domestic violence calls in the last two months as I have in the rest of my career combined.
As I said in the OP the only "supernatural" feeling I ever get is the energy of a room. Since about the same time as all this happened, I've been feeling negative energy, cold waves, and random feelings of dread almost constantly.
I've been experiencing sleep paralysis (I'm sure you lot are familiar) since I was around 12 or 13, not any real consistency but usually twice a year or so. In the last 3 months I've been experiencing this twice a month, sometimes weekly. I never thought the sleep paralysis had any supernatural roots, choosing to believe it has to do with sleep schedule/stress, etc. but it could be related to the next part of my story.
So three weeks ago I was transporting a patient to the hospital. It was a 911 call for severe abdominal pain, very routine, the patient had no history of psych or emotional issues. She was a 36yo female, very standard.
She had taken an ambulance to the hospital once before, and asked if there were always two medics in the back now. I was the only person in the back with her, I said so. She became a little agitated, gradually escalating to hysteria. She was screaming things like "Who are these people, why are they so angry" and unbuckled herself from the stretcher, tried to run from the ambulance while it was moving. I had to strap her down with the 4-point restraints.
This is the one that really freaked me out.
When this happened was when I started to think that maybe I had some spirits (or something similar) following me and messing with my life. I spoke to a couple of family friends who are more into the stuff than I am.
One of them told me to burn sage, the other one said burning sage would just piss them off, I should just wait it out. They all seemed to agree that these are probably the spirit(s) of patient(s) who died on me and felt that I hadn't done everything I could to save them.
Here's where I ask for your help, guys. What that fuck do I do now? If you have any questions for me please feel free.
I feel so helpless
I don't know if it's relevant or not but I will describe my sleep paralysis, if only to give me something to do while I wait and pray for a response
It seems like a lot of people start getting sleep paralysis after they hear about it for the first time, which is what happened to me. I was 12 or 13 and watched a Discovery Channel documentary about it, and the first time it happened was that night.
Mine is always the same, the room is dark but I can see the whole room. Can't move (obviously) and I've never tried to call out or anything like that. I never see anything like some people do but I "know" that something is there watching me and I have a very strong sense of dread. If I close my eyes a cacophony goes off in my ears, and goes away as soon as I open them again. Since I know what is happening, I just tell myself that it will end soon, nothing is really there, etc. It lasts for what feels like a couple of hours, and then I wake up in bed, normal as can be.
It's also worth noting that I virtually never remember my dreams, but I remember these perfectly every time
One last bump and I will let the thread die. I hope any lurkers at least enjoyed the story
if this is legit, try to pay as little attention to the negative energy/beings/happenings as possible.
ethereal beings/ paranormal entities feed off of it and it only gives them more control, completely block them out until you have a real game plan from a professional.
hope this helped senpai, good luck
Hi op, medicfag attached with a private ambulance company here. Now I live in an Asian country so spiritual stuff like these are well known and accepted around here.
I have experiences similar to what you had but in a lesser degree over a long er period of time. But with relation to what you mention, I had a tenant over at my place once, Chinese guy with a Filipino wife and their 1 year old daughter.
No big deal, until I started getting really weird dreams; mom tries to kill me after turning into a hideous monster, girl in pink chases me like a ghost out of hell etc. Couldn't shake them and they started to wear me down.
Then one day I hear that my neighbour's 4 year old son saw a girl in pink outside his bedroom window calling him to open it up for him. He lives on the 3rd floor. He was smart enough to say no and walk away though. Then when I go to work, I hear from my fellow Paramedic that she experienced a girl in pink float into her room and asked her if she wanted to play. The coincidences were too close together to ignore.
Now the weird shit happens. I wake up at midnight, walk to the kitchen in the dark cos whose afraid of the dark amirite? Fill up a glass of water, and as I drink it, I see a kid beside the tenant's baby pram. Completely black, except his eyes. They have an intensity that I can't pull away from. I panic and move to hide behind the wall. When I look again, it's gone. I laugh it off and go back to bed.
The very next night, it's the same time in the evening and I'm talking to my mom in the kitchen, not bringing up last night so I don't spoop her. I am facing the window and notice sometime popping out from above. Figure it was a bird or something. I look up and see a woman's face, black skinned and all and intense eyes. Suddenly a long length of hair sweeps across the ENTIRE FUCKING WINDOW. I panic and ask my mom if she saw that. She clearly did not. Fuck me. (Cont.)
I'm hoping to do something a little more proactive than pretend it isn't happening, but thanks kohai
Always good to see another medicfag around, will be reading. Shit's pretty spoopy so far, looking forward to it
(Cont.) So the next night, same time. I am walking home through this sheltered walkway. Suddenly the lights above me and directly in front of the pathway I'm walking ahead of me shut off. Nowhere else is affected. Literally say out loud "okay, I know where this is going. So either cut it out or get it over with" Stand there for 30secs. Nothing happens.Keep walking and see this sketchy guy standing by a tree. He is some distance away from the tree and looking down but his silouhette is clear. As I approach closer in the dark walkway, he retreats with his back toward the tree and I just keep moving along. As I look toward the tree again, I still see the man's silouhette looking down but upon closer inspection, I realize it was part of the tree the whole time. Fuck me sideways, Jesus Chrism.
Decide I have to inform my mom and dad about it. They freak and inform the tenants just so they were aware. Now this Chinese motherfucker goes "Oh! No worries, they're with me."
We were stunned and reasonably pissed that he kept spirits without our consent. We inspected his room and found a jar with a fetus. Needless to say we chased them out posthaste.
So basically, spirits can attach to your person for a multitude of reasons. They will begin to affect you negatively and drain you of your energy and life. No joke. Be mindful of these things and try to brighten up your home or environment and hope they leave you alone. Alternatively, the Chinese and Malay communities here believe that spirits are tied to objects as well. Have you picked up any foreign objects or gifts from people that you keep near you? I.e living room, bedroom, wallet etc. Try to get rid of them and stay far away from them. May not seem obvious, but as long as it doesn't belong to you, just dispose of it as soon as you can. Respectfully as well.
All the best, paramedic-kun.
Thanks buddy, this helped a lot. I will go through my home with a fine-toothed comb and see if anything pops out at me that I should get rid of.
Also glad to hear you got out of your predicament relatively unscathed, keep up the good work
Oh and just to add on to what you said about possible ex-patients who felt you did not do enough to save them. In my experience, I have had them visit the ward (back when I was still a nurse) after they passed on, but no matter the way they died, they never seemed malicious at all as it goes with most spirits that for in the hospital. However some malicious spirits do hang around and cause a nuisance like the group of medical students that got "possessed " in my old ward by one such spirit. Bear in mind, they tend to prey upon the weak willed and weary in spirit. If you have e any indication that it may be an ex-patient, get some prayers done at a church or any other religious faction and offer your sympathies and well wishes.
I don't know if I would consider myself weak-willed, but I get that would be a hard thing to admit to yourself. The weary in spirit park speaks to me though; I've been pretty bummed in general for the last year or so, just at the state the world is in with all the violence and hatred.
I do always make a point to express my sympathy to friends/family of patients who pass whenever I get the chance, so maybe my job really has nothing to do with it. I don't know, medic-san.
I've been thinking a lot and I've got a lot of thinking ahead of me. Thanks again, buddy
This, OP-kun. Be strong and firm in your dealings with them. Not outright rejection (negative energy=fuel for them), but acceptance of the possibility of their existence and moving on with your life.
Bad spirits will happen, worse for those who deal with the dead and dying. If ever they get to you, remember: they're dead. They lost their right to be heard when they started jeopardizing your life and everyone else's. If you need stronger protection than that, ask your spirit guide/guardian angel to be your gatekeeper.
If you remember their energy signature from previous encounters while you were meditating, search for their energy and ask them. Sometimes needing to "talk" isn't the right word. If I feel particularly shitty one day, I search for that energy and submerge myself in it. Feelsgoodmayne. Somewhere between de-stressed and lighter than air. You never quite realize how much weight until it slowly lifts and nothing's there.
Ask their name when you feel comfortable. It might not always be necessary, "a rose by another other name" and all that jazz.
I've done tai-chi on and off for a while, I'm assuming that flow of energy is the kind of thing you are talking about, but I never thought of it as another presence. Maybe I'll pick up the art more fervently.
It's far past my bedtime though, I've got a shift tomorrow. Thanks for the tips, and here's hoping for a slow day.
Also a fellow EMT-P here (Pasco County, FL). I can't say I've ever had any blatantly paranormal experiences like the two of you posted. Yeah a few flashbacks here and there, the occasional wondering if you could have done something different, and typical EMS stuff that comes with the job title.
As far as paranormal, which I'm not sure it's as paranormal as it is that I tend to be a shit magnet, but I do run into recurring "coincidences" here and there. For instance, there's a specific intersection that if I get posted there, I always leave with a patient from an MVA. The most recent one was a pedestrian already in PEA by the time we made it to him & the time before that was a hit & run, and so on... But I'm not sure if that classifies as paranormal.
I did just have the instance where we were responding & nobody was moving out of the way (more so than usual lol) despite the sirens. Come to find out, all the lights were solid.
Ive had the ambulance die several times while we were transporting patients, and yeah that was only while I was on board.
So I'm not sure.. As far as advice, I really wish I had more to offer. If anything, at least know you're not alone with weird patterns.
As a retired medic I'm sure you did everything you could for those people OP so I don't think they are haunting you over negligence. I always talked with my guardian angel that was with me maybe try and reach out to talk with it. I'm not religious but she still helps me all the time and it helps me stay relaxed. Wishing you well guys thanks for your work i kinda miss the job but i got burned out really quick.
Meditate. Focus on the light, watch it fluctuating, dividing and reforming into its center. Ask the light to reveal those beings of light who have been assigned to you.
Bask in them, ask them to talk about themselves. They're assigned to you for a reason, often because they have similar outlooks or have been in similar situations. If you listen carefully, they'll tell you their stories.
OP here, fresh off a 15 hour shift. 7 calls total, one was a trauma code, dude got shot 9 times. We would've called it on scene except there showed fine v-fib on the monitor, and our protocol is if there is any heart activity at all we work it. He was dead from the get-go of course, but my luck the way it is his heart just got done reading "The Little Engine That Could"
Glad to hear I'm not the only one, and I'm Orange County, FL myself (not sure if I mentioned previously or not)
Thanks for the reassurance brother, I'm beginning to wonder if the origin even is job-related. And if you miss it, see if you can't get picked up part-time or something, you wouldn't have to work more than you wanted to. Services aaaaalways need medics
So you've had shitty luck over the past few months. It could all be a coincidence (though you don't see willing to believe that).
What's the maintenance routine like on your equipment? Do you do the maintenance or does another company handle the maintenance? Has there been a change in the people working on the trucks?
What's the weather been like? Extra cold? Snowy, rainy? Any of these things could be caused by fucked up circuitry due to weather.
To me it seems like the equipment fuckups got you spooked. You're already stressed and tired, now this shit kinda put you on edge. As a result of getting chewed out by your boss and generally being stressed, your sleep paralysis has been acting up. Because you've even more sleep deprived, even the most minor instances get you even more on edge than ever. You might misread something in the heat of the moment, you might miss certain things you would've caught before, or you might be extra sensitive to things you used to ignore. Sleep deprivation can wreak havoc on your psyche man.
How about the rest of the crew? Any issues with them? Have they submitted more reports of broken equipment or anything? Have you brought up these kind of thoughts with them? Maybe they're more in the loop with what's going on, maybe they know that the company switched over to someone else for maintenance.
As for this one:
The simplest and most likely answer is drugs. Do you know what happened to her after you dropped her off? I'd bet money on her being high on something. The stress overall and your sleep deprived state made her actions and words conform to the ideas you had already thought of. Think about your first day on the job. If some lady started saying that shit, you'd think she was high or maybe having a mental break. In the state you're in nw, however, your mind is trying to piece something together that doesn't necessarily exist.
Take a few weeks off and you'll feel right as rain.
I believed at first it was all a string of bad luck, I'm past that now just because of the sheer volume of incidences and the length of time it's been happening
We have a few mechanics and a workshop at our home station who maintain the fleet; as I said before the trucks all have their quirks but they are generally in well repair, our guys know what they are about and will always have a conversation with you every time you put one out of service. There isn't any reason I can think of multiple trucks would shut down without warning on me in the spawn of a few weeks, none of them had been out of service recently.
I live in Florida, it has been warmer than it usually is this time of year until the last week or two it finally started getting into the 40s, no extreme weather, just the usual rainstorms.
Everyone being tired and stressed is pretty much a standard workplace environment in EMS, there have been periods in the past where I was stretched far thinner in that respect than I have been recently and it never affected >(I never use the right form of this word) me to the point of paranoia or messing with my job performance before, unless all the years are just finally taking their toll.
I have talked to the guys and gals I work with a little bit about it, and they just kind of dismiss it with a "that sucks bro" or the family favorite "Suck it up, Buttercup."
I should've mentioned for the woman, because of her outburst she was of course tested for drugs and came back negative for everything, she ended up being held for an involuntary psych evaluation because her attempt to flee the ambulance was taken as suicidal intent, but as far as I know the psych docs didn't diagnose her with anything. I never did get to see her in person again to ask what the deal was, or if she still saw the people around me. Probably for the best, it would've done her more harm than me good.
As for the last part, in mid February I'm going camping out of state for a couple weeks with my dad, it'll be the first vacation I've taken in a couple of years and I think it will do me a lot of good. Cheers m8
It's definitely weird, OP. I'm just trying to think of logical explanations. I think when you return you'll be more rested and hopefully this issue will go away.
If not, I'd suggest talking with a friend at work. Just let him know what's going on in your life, the sleep paralysis, say you've been stressed and just feel like you've been having bad luck. Maybe you can get them to watch your back, and vouch for you in the future that something weird is going on. A best case scenario would be if they can vouch for your bad luck and maybe report on creepy/unlucky things that have been happening to you. Who knows, maybe the other people there have had the same, unexplained bad luck and were just reluctant to come forward about it when everyone else just brushed off that kind of thing.
Perhaps it is a curse, someone died in the cab or who was under your care and they aren't happy. I would imagine being haunted by a restless spirit at an already stressful job would be especially distressing, so I would make sure to exhaust all possible logical explanations first. Either way, it sounds like you've been having a rough time, so enjoy your vacation. You guys work way too damn hard at that job as it is.
I definitely appreciate the logical point of view bringing me back down to earth, wasn't really expecting it on /x/
I will try to talk more about it to my coworkers, maybe put some feelers out about who I can get more personal with
And thanks for your kind words. We spend all day getting kicked and spat at, I recently got a scar on my forehead because some drunk chick took a swipe at my face with her raptor claws, so a little appreciation goes a long way.
This is a PSA not related to the thread:
Always be nice to your EMTs, folks. Burger flippers are petitioning for $15/hr, that's what most EMTs make on overtime. One of my work buddies recently left us to go work at a 7/11 because the pay was better and they treat their employees like humans
Hey OP, Asian med-fag here from earlier. Came by to check up on you and see if things are improving. Things have been pretty tame on my end, save for the weird knocking on my door by 'spooks'.
What >>17262285 is very sound advice and some good and proper rest as well as open conversation about your issues will do you alot of good. Hell, all of us could use it.
I'm sure you'll thoroughly enjoy your camping trip, OP. Get out there, clear your head and come back a more energized and revitalized man.
I'm going in for another shift right now, one of my good buddies is crew chief tonight so I'll talk to him about it. I'll report in tomorrow morning
I'm interested about your spoops too, are they just way bolder in general in Asia because they are more generally excepted as real?
I have 4.5 more hours before I end my 12 hour shift for the night. Hope you have a good shift too.
I wouldn't call the spoops here bolder per se, but it's generally creepier because of the rituals associated with the religious superstitions that take place. For example, we have a 'festival' held every year in August called the Hungry Ghost Festival. Why the hell they thought it would a good idea to call it a festival? Beats me. The story behind it is that in that time of the month, all the ghost from the Chinese version of hell are released from the gates and wonder around for about a week. Family members provide offerings for their loved ones long gone. Mind you, the Chinese believe EVEYONE goes to hell, but your treatment there is different based upon your actions on earth. If you are to receive judgement first, you are placed in Purgatory.
They put red candles and small offerings of food for the ghosts near playgrounds, schools and houses and it is accepted that no one is to bother the food or candles lest you want to be haunted by the soon-to-be angry ghost. It would normally freak people out especially those from foreign countries considering this seems a little morbid and I hardly believed in it much myself. But I have always been under the impression that when you conduct rituals like these and try to, in essence, call back your loved ones and provide for them while showing respect, you begin to attract the wrong sort of attention.
Mostly seen cases of acute schizophrenia, psychosis, paranoia and delirium when unlucky individuals step upon one of these offerings and proceed home/work only to begin screaming in pain with standard complains of a stabbing pain in their legs or thighs and seeing 'shadows' moving around them.
The Malay and Indian communities also have their own... well, disturbing rituals that they conduct. Some well known and accepted and others, a little more than taboo. The fetus in a jar thing I mentioned, is primarily a Malay spiritualist practice that is shunned in public but utilized by seedier individuals to bring harm to others.
The Indians sometimes make vows to one of their many dieites and when they reach a certain age, are expected to participate in a ritual called 'Thaipusam' where they, and I kid you not, have metal spikes poked into various parts of their body to support a metal banner of sorts that weighs a few kilograms and proceed to walk a few miles while in a trance state, as if possessed by the deity. However that's mostly just a spectacle.
It's mostly a matter of respecting the various rituals and avoid unnecessary curiosity that prevent spirits from disturbing you. Or so they say.
The presence of so many cultures living within the same community in a multi-racial environment and nation brings about a very interesting and diverse society that has many benefits. But the traditions of old seems to have a foundation based upon fear and unhealthy worship and dependence upon the multitudes of dieties, spirits and gods. This also bleeds into the younger generation and I personally feel, at least in a strictly rational standpoint, it limits an individual's morality and rational thinking in favor of highly superstitious beliefs just "to be safe".
And on a less rational and more spiritual note, all of this in turn pressurizes our society to constantly be in fear and servitude of such spirits, which I am opposed to. So to answer the question, perhaps the spoops here are much bolder because of the society which elavates their presence and influence.
On a lighter note, I managed to resuscitate a guy after a collapse preceding an asthma attack about an hour ago. Feeling good.