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i am a 25 year old schizo NEET who is interested in the occult for possible financial and romantic opportunities, i would be interested in any advice you might have for me
in case you were wondering about me, here is my story:
>grew up catholic
>went to private school
>liked latin and saints and angels and prayers and wanted to be a priest
>was a smart kid
>but didn't do work
>school psychiatrist put me on ritalin
>spent most of my time reading scifi and fantasy and drifting by in class
>eventually moved to a gifted and talented program at a public middle school
>began to lose faith in church and government and structure and hierarchy and authority
>became a super fedora atheist
>got to high school
>had art class with really chill, intellectual kid
>he starts telling me about buddhism
>realize just cause i reject christian dogma doesn't mean i reject everything
>start studying hinduism, buddhism, daoism, tantra, kabbalah, sufism, etc.
>stumble upon the principia discordia and illuminatus! trilogy
>learn about r.a.w. and chaos magick
>start reading leary and lily
>decide to take acid to enlighten myself in college
>get to college
>take acid
>find everything i ever wanted
>start taking acid regularly
>start selling acid
>fall in deep with the acid plot
>eventually go insane
>come up with a plot to "immanentize the eschaton"
>end up arrested then put in a psych ward
>spend the next couple of years in and out of psych ward
>eventually got stabilized on antipsychotics and antidepressants
>can no longer take drugs (except that sweet sweet ganja i partake in regularly)
>have not finished my degree because of schizo breakdown
>have not held a job in five years
>currently on disability and living with parents
i just wanna find some sort of job that pays enough so i can have a cat and a girlfriend and weed, i lack funds and brainpower to finish college
will the occult help? what should i do? i've always been skeptical of crowley and his ilk
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What meds are you on and how are they working out?
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>>17244901
546 mg Invega Trinza tri-monthly injectible (antipsychotic) + 100 mg Pristiq daily tablet (antidepressant)
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>>17244832
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfPeprQ7oGc
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>>17244832
Hey OP, I'm a 30 year old schizo neet, on disability ever since my first psychosis 6 years ago.
I dunno though, I looked in the occult for answers for a long time, but it hasn't helped me in getting back to work in the slightest. It's very interesting and it helped me to work trough my psychotic experiences though.
What helped in getting back to life and not just lying around all day was quit smoking weed and building up a structure in my day that I try to follow as good as I can. Waking up, taking a shower, going out for a walk, etc..
I'd forget about the occult for now and focus on getting a job if I were you. After you have a daily structure to follow, try to do some volunteer work, to see if your able to handle the workload, but start slow with like 20% (that's where I'm at now) and start building a resumee for a real job one day.
We schizos live enough in our heads and the inner worlds as it is, adding another occult layer to dwell on isn't really helping with getting out there and getting shit done so yeah..
tl;dr: forget occult, get back to work step by step, also quit smoking weed, not really something that is recommended for schizos.
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