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>can feel the borders between my ego and reality
>realize that i exist only as a very minute slice of a reality that is too large to be defined
>i am a carbon being made of flesh and bone living on a rock in the milky way system, and i can only see the visible range of colors with two eyes wired to a very complicated electrical piece of meat
>as a meatthing, my ego separates my concept of self from my external perceptions of reality to prevent everything from becoming a milky haze
>begin to synchronize and fully realize the mechanics of my own existence
I don't care about so many things that seem important. I've realized that so many of our values as human beings are rooted in hyperreality that doesn't have any real grounds beyond us believing them.
I feel like I've touched a cold spot facing away from the sun on some faraway planet. In a scary kind of way, I think I've hit a realization that has disconnected me from certain things I've known since I was a child.
I need to be my own anchor, now. Nothing else is real enough to hold on to.
I want to know if this is my depersonalization fucking with me or if this could be some kind of spiritual/paranormal ego thing. My mental health might just be fucked.
"It's like how in cartoons, they draw outlines to separate the character from the background. It's like I can feel that, almost." - Related.
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I'm completely sober, by the way. I just feel like this very often. Too aware of my physical existence.
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Also, I'm on the Autism spectrum, if that is related at all.
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>>17197886
Become an artist. It's the only way to find meaning in this world when you've gone as far as you have.
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You are an idiot.
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>>17197903
Do people live and die and not get this far?
Do they just ignore it and live in a bubble?
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>>17197907
I might be so far in a hole that it's hard for you to explain to me comprehensively why I'm an idiot, but it would be nice to know why you think that.
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>>17197910
I do
I am still attached to this plane
Just do mindfulness meditation and let everything flow
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>>17197886
>is on the autism spectrum
>has depersinalization
Autists tend to live in their own world and see it with a unique mind. That can be good and bad but usually ends in people feeling disconnected from the world around them because their heads perceive the world differently.
Depersonalization... anyone who ever had a longer period of heavy weed smoking knows this feeling.
It's not a spiritual awakening, it's your brain chemistry and perception of the world fucking up
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>>17197954
The fact that mental states are physically influenced by "brain chemistry" doesn't mean spirituality doesn't exist, and your definition of autism is lazy and inaccurate, please unstupidify yourself before you make any further posts on this site.
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>>17197987
The world is way more complex than you think.
And after saying that I must say that is so simple that is scary .
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>>17198000
how could you possibly know what I think?
got over-Internet telepathic abilities?
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>>17197910
I dunno man. I'm only 24.
But most people just get lost chasing status, random pussy, alcohol etc.
the universe just pushes some people in a different direction. Become a musician, artist, athelete, or hardcore magician. Pick an obsession and run with it, buddy. You're not here for long. Do something.
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>>17197886
Tl;Dr I'm an edgy teen who believes they are having an existential crisis.
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>a very minute slice of a reality that is too large to be defined
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