Last month I went to cape cod to visit my Portuguese grandmother.

It's all in ur brain.

Wash some cold water over your face, slap yourself and get your head straight. Then go try a cupcake without the crazy thoughts.

>Other aspects of Portuguese folk religion were not approved by the official church, including witchcraft, magic, and sorcery. Formal religion, folk beliefs, and superstition were frequently jumbled together, and in the popular mind all were part of being Roman Catholic. Particularly in the isolated villages of northern Portugal, belief in witches, witchcraft, and evil spirits was widespread. Some persons believed in the concept of the "evil eye" and feared those who supposedly possessed it. Again, women were the main practitioners. Almost every village had its "seers," practitioners of magic, and "healers."

>>17174276
Eh, even if I'm just imagining the fish oil taste, that doesn't explain why/how this woman showed up claiming to be my aunt when I've never heard of her and the rest of my family regarded her as a stranger.

I know, however, that I'm not topically susceptible to suggestion. If not for that, I would be more likely to accept that I'm just imagining the taste.

>>17174249
Eu gosto como qualquer outra nacionalidade é tomada por algo distante e estranho.

>Exótica Portugal. Distante e cheia de magia

>>17174514
What's your point?
My grandmother could just as easily be from Arizona and this situation would still be fucked. The fact that my family has ties to a country/culture that has a richer history than America's just puts this thing in context.

>>17174487
Everybody thinks they aren't susceptible to suggestion.

I'll humor you though because the worst I can do is waste my own time. Two or three things I need from you an indepth description of this aunt? Also did she have any strange accent, was she supposed to be portugese as well?
Next I need a better description of how you offended her?
Finally I need what she said to you about the sweetness in as close to the original wording as possible( I assume it wasn't in english so do your best translation) this might be important.

>>17174793
Like I mentioned, she was very withdrawn and disinterested in me or anyone else. She sat on the corner of a bed in a sideroom glowering at nothing through the doorway. She had a reasonably neat demeanor, save for a yellow tooth. She wore silver rings, but nothing about her was too different from my other relatives that come straight from Europe.
However, she did speak Spanish, but that also didn't stand out too much because I've had other aunts and cousins by marriage that spoke Spanish or Italian.

What she said to me, as exactly as I can remember it, was "y que la dulzura morirà de su vida, mijo."

As for how I insulted/shamed her... I have no idea. We didn't interact directly or encounter each other alone before that moment when she pulled me aside.

>>17174925
Hmm, your best bet would be going to a practicioner of most any religion/spirituality and get them to do a purifying ritual or a blessing. If you're religious then I'd say go with that however if you aren't a wiccan or ceremonial magician would probably be more willing to do a full ritual than say a pastor.

In the meantime I'd burn incense (but preferably sage) around your house but espescially where you and others sleep. Chuck a pinch of salt over your left shoulder while you're at it.

This is pretty general advice but without knowing who or what she is and how she did it I can't give any more.

>>17175010
I didn't even realize that's what the OP picture was referring to.

>>17174925
>y que la dulzura morirá de su vida mijo
Literally
And that the sweetness shall die from your life, my son

>>17174249
Only advice I can give is get some cayenne and enjoy some sriracha

>>17174249
sounds like a blessing to me

i would give a lot to not crave cola anymore

File: image.png (96KB, 265x258px) Image search: [Google]

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t. Alberto Barbosa

WE

WUZ

KINGZ

N

SHIT

>>17175010
Some Turkish merchants fill yellow nylon bags with sponges, give them some shape and sell them to the refugges as flotation vests. Hilarity ensues.

Do you want to taste the sweet things again mijo?

>>17174249
You know nothing about the "European character", which isn't even a thing.

You know even less about the Portuguese character. Come to Portugal.

>>17174249
are you overweight, by anychance?

amerifat much?

are you a fatass?

>>17177031
tubby wubby?

got a little extra fluff?

carrying around a few million unnecessary calories?

>guys a person who lives in a non-english speaking country, who speaks a language with a different syntax than my own tried to convey a thought to me, and my life is so laughable that i misinterpreted it as a paranormal curse

>>17174249
humanity should fall.

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148KB, 673x515px

>>17174249
this picture is op btw

>>17175254
This, your initial translation was pretty bad.
Could you transcribe the "You ashamed me" part in spanish, exactly how she said it? Maybe she meant something different.
Also have you thought that she may not like you (or your parents) and is putting fish oil in your food to mess up with you?

>>17177082
most rational explaination. she's from a country where being fat is bad. she sees what her familia has become while living in burgr-faceb-instagarmastan, and naturally is disappoint, but because she's familia, tries to make her better herself WITH MAGIC

>>17177127

That shit got a mad laugh out of me yo

>>17174249
>literal sand nigger

File: image.jpg (1MB, 3264x2448px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 3264x2448px

I woke up this morning only to find every dish in the kitchen covered in this black dust. It tastes like charcoal.

>>17177451
Why the fuck would you taste it, you fat fuck

>>17177189
>>17177082
I'm not fat, although I am tall and used to play football so I do have a bulky build from my days of a college weight room.

>>17177133
We live two hours away, she hasn't been to our house. And the "you shamed me" part was in English.

OP we really need to know your weight

why did you shame a witch anyway?

>>17174672
>richer history than America's
so some humans move a few thousand miles on the speck of rock they live on and everything is SO DIFFERENT
She sounds like an asshole with influence over the people around her. It's reasonable to ask her to explain any hostile actions and if she acts unreasonable, slap her shit. It's a reasonable consequence of her actions, if you lean on someone or crowd them without respecting them then you get laid out like a rug.

>>17177479
Stop the tough guy shit, please. It's an absolute shibboleth for a pussy. It makes you sound weak and insecure.

>>17177470
>>17174672
OP is shit. I side with the witch.

>>17177473
200 pounds at 182 cm. Not particularly fat, though I'm sure my BMI is high.

>>17177133
My initial translation wasn't bad? The literal translation is, of course, different from the actual meaning of what she said. And I say that not just as someone reading into shit, but as a fluent speaker of Spanish.

>>17177464
That's a pretty standard response to unfamiliar substances, isn't it? Interacting with each of the primary senses until you can identify the substance is the simplest way to figure it out.

>>17174249

>Shaming the Europeans instead of ISIS

FUCK THIS EARTH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


AHHH

AHH