Last year I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder and since

the first i went 'there' i was taking prozac everyday and had come off of antipsychotics a few months prior. i think that while i was on the antipsychs i was disconnected from .... it.... entirely. maybe just due to apathy i don't know. i did not meditate or project back then so it is hard to say but i was still connected before i started them.

>>14956309
Listen to your Doctor and don't deviate from what He/She says. Side effects of meds usually wear off after a few months.

>>14956349
I was originally placed on an antidepressant and it made me loose all interest in spirituality when it was a huge part of my life before. This was a year and a half ago and I've only recently been starting to get back into it. It's been very difficult. Are you still on meds?

Paliperidone palmatite. Caused all kinds of physical and mental distress. Been off it maybe 3 months, not enough time to have fully recovered. Slowly getting back to normal I guess. Basically like starting over on all my physical and mental progress. Not the best or only way I could have handled what I was going through but meh, still live close to family and unfortunately preferred not upsetting them over my own desires from life. Hurray poison I guess. Hopefully won't have to see another doctor simply due to side effects.

>>14956355
Yeah, I know. But some of the side effects really did some damage. I was on an antipsychotic for a month and got off it in April and I am still experiencing residual side effects.
I have a lot of faith in science, especially in chemical neurological advancement, but a part of me has died since I've been on some of these meds. Maybe that's a good thing, maybe not. I wouldn't have a problem if my spirituality wasn't affected by these pharms.

>>14956362
no, i started to resent the idea of medication after my first visit there. i quit prozac cold turkey and i know everyone is different but it was the best thing i could have ever done for myself. i had some withdrawal symptoms because i didnt quit right. head zaps mostly but they have since gone. i feel more in touch with it. i am it.

>>14956376
Can you elaborate on mental and physical distress? Paliperidone palmatite seems a lot more "intense" than what I was on (Asenapine). But I completely lost my ability to think. I could not spell words that I had learned how to spell in 2nd grade. I lacked all comprehension of abstract concepts and ended up failing my lit analysis class because of it.

>>14956393
I don't blame you there. As much as I don't like being on medication I am worried about my safety when I am not on it. Without them I would be in the hospital or in court again.

>>14956429
Affected how much sleep I was getting, typically 5 hours a night compared to the 10 I enjoy (when possible). Lost all imagination. I mean, my own voice was gone from my mind. no longer able to day dream or picture words objects or people mentally. thought I went sterile but been slowly seeing improvements. drugs and alcohol stopped affecting me (yeah I'm probably crazy for doing them while medicated. I like to have a good time). Emotions went away completely. Did plain awful in school but was thankful to have a place to go every day. Lost interest in games and TV. Didn't even have a friendly doctor. Just recalled the term anhedonia, I think that is an accurate descriptor of the side effects.

Really hope it all clears up, likely going to be something of a struggle.

>>14956485
That sounds similar to what I was going through. Really frightening. I've been off of it for about 3 months now and I am just now starting to get my basic spelling, communication, and creativity skills back. My psychiatrist never seemed to believe me when I told him about the side effects I was experiencing.
Are you still on any medications?

>>14956355
WOW. no. no no no. thats NOT. okay. ALL my doctors.. YES. EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. OF. THEM. told me to stop taking medication IMMEDIATELY if I get any adverse side effects. Because 99% of the time, they DONT go away. and a MONTH??? no. if you *do* want to power through, a week at the most. holy shit, do NOT spread misinformation like that. you could get people KILLED.

>>14956549
(more angry ranting from me)
jsyk I have schizoaffective disorder and I've never had any problems with my doctors. My doctors said that even if I dont like how I act on the medication I can stop it at any time, or to call them to wean myself off of them if I've taken them for more than a week.

They also told me to stick to the lowest dosage thats effective for me.

I keep running into people who keep having shit for doctors. Take my advice.. if something's hurting you, stop doing the thing.

>>14956485
was your fucking doctor a "family doctor" or a bona-fide psychiatrist?

also fuck them. There are plenty of good doctors out there, and fuck that guy.

>>14956535
No, was going through a nervous breakdown. Looked too far down a rabbit hole. When I realized I wasn't myself I went to the doctor on my own. She wanted it to be on the permanent side, taking injections. I got out of there and wish I had done it a bit sooner.

>>14956582
jesus christ.
I went to the doc thinking I didnt exist and I was hallucinating cats coming out of walls and starving myself to death, and all they did was talk to me calmly and give me lamictal.

been pretty fine ever since.
sometimes reality breaks for me, but I'm not so dissociative now.

Just wanted to add...
After medication, I seem to have lost a bit of time management, and focus. But otherwise nothing negative.
I'm just glad I'm not randomly falling asleep anymore or depressed. Or laughing, then crying, then laughing, or crying. Or thinking I'm my rp characters, or thinking I dont exist.

I still have lucid dreams and hallucinations sometimes. sometimes it saps up my creativity, but I think that's more related to the buffering of depression for me.

as for the paranormal bit... I can go off my meds for a day, and hear the voices, and sometimes see the cracks in reality break open. For the past three days I've been sleeping too much and lucid dreaming nonstop.

been pretty enjoyable.

>>14956626
I'm happy to hear things are better for you. Is lamictal/lamotrigine the only medication you have tried?

>>14956603
Yeah, well, incompetent Texas doctor lady only spoke with me once before starting with the medicine. Might have something against people who smoke marijuana. I probably shouldn't get into all this. Just know there were heavy misunderstandings or lack of interest in what I was going through from the professional.

>>14956638
I've tried lamictal and respridol.

respridol was pretty awful. It made me super dissociative and I couldnt think at all. I kept losing things and I couldnt remember where I was.

also note, I just get myself functional to the level of "eating every day", brushing teeth, and showering.

everything else is just bonus. I pay my rent though.. but I dont have a job. kinda live at a commune. So, knowing that, I'm probably not functional enough to be in "normal" society.

>>14956660
there are reasons why I fucking hate texas.

Here's what happened to me the first time I went to go see my psychiatrist..

I went to the hospital. I didnt know where I was. I didnt know who I was supposed to see. I didnt know where to go.

I walked up to a random part of the hospital and walked inside and asked a nurse where to go. She fucking called a shuttle to pick me up to take me to the front desk. I was scared so i cried because I was lost in the shuttle. The guy was super nice.

I got up there, we found out where I was supposed to go, they took me again in the shuttle. I got in a little bit late. the guy was super super nice, and let me use his phone to call a doc to get me checked out medically.

I had three sessions with him before being put on meds. he wanted to get to know me first and talk about things.

also.
he fucking had a supervisor and he was peer reviewed.

>>14956309
it pisses me off when doctors act like a bunch of cunts

>>14956689
Glad you got help, seriously. Had family take me to the location of her office. Spoke with her alone. She mostly works with criminals, and I have a clean record. It's all very shady in retrospect, mostly trying to march on.

>>14956626
>Or thinking I'm my rp characters
Not to poke fun at everyone's disorders here, but damn, no wonder why /x/ is the way it is :(

>>14956711
lmao I'm pretty aware of my own stupidity.
long story short. I didnt think I existed and that I was a conglomerate of characters that were in my mind, and that they had taken over my body from their own dimension, and were using me as a puppet to interact with the earth world. Also, they missed their home dimension and wanted desperately to get back to it.

this was the batshit things I said to my therapist/psychiatrist.
(also less rp characters, more characters I was writing about for my book. I actually dont rp.)

>>14956309
>have a strong link with other planes and frequencies.
> I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder
ahahaha. you are mentally sick, dude. anti-psychotics actually will try to block your psychotic episodes, they don't "enhance" it.

PROTIP FOR ANYONE ON LAMICTAL..

Lamictal has a strange interaction with ibuprofen.
I can induce dissociation and hallucinations by taking 800mg ibuprofen at the same time as lamictal. or a bit afterwards.

drug interaction will be different for each person though.

>>14956762
>strange interaction
don't fuck up your liver, drugs can combine into really toxic shit down there

>>14956666
You should talk to your doctor about alternatives.

>>14956905
why?
Lamictal is working fine for me.
I stopped taking the respridol.

>>14956762
Are there any other side effects?

>>14956925
If that is all you can do all day I don't think it's working for you.

>>14956933
1) I'm able to make art.
2) I'm able to pay rent
3) able to drive and pay car insurance
4) eat, brush teeth, drink water,shower.


what else would I need to do??? What else is there *to* do?

>>14956933
you know.. its people like you, with that mentality, that hurts people who seek psychiatric help.
Everyone's "functionality" level is different. For some, the complete eradication of negative mental effects is "functional". For others, they just want to sleep at night, or stop hallucinating.

the thing that bothered me was the dissociation and depression. Everything else didnt bother me. Once I got medicated, I was able to take care of myself, my car, my pets, and my gf.

It doesnt matter if I still see cats come out of the wall. It doesnt bother me, and doesnt hinder my functionality.

>>14956954
I suppose.
How old were you when you started hallucinating cats and stuff?

>>14956976

19.
I was at college and I was convinced the palm trees were people's heads on a pike. I was also convinced that I could see the sun rays individually and that they danced in the light.

I wrote a speech for my public speaking class that didnt make any sense.
Later on, I stopped making less sense and had to drop out of college.

I lost my ability to read books because the letters visably move up and down and the voices in my head wouldnt stop.

still have difficulty reading, but less-so when it's on the computer. I also used to keep transcripts of the voices in my head.

>>14956933

Uh, you clearly don't have any idea of how anti-psychotics work.

They aren't meant to make you a functioning member of society, they don't generally enable you to hold down a job because they do a number on your cognitive abilities.

All anti-psychotics do are stop you from being a danger to yourself and others, you're still likely to be a hermit for the rest of your life.